Can't say I didn't warn ya

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Can't say I didn't warn ya

Parker Price
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Joined: Jul 21 2016, 08:00 AM

Jul 23 2016, 09:34 AM #1

July 20th, 2016
2:15 pm

Parker was at the end of his rope. He needed to stay awake and Starbucks was expensive so he had to opt for a more homegrown option. And that required a dangerous quest to Walmart to retrieve commoner's coffee because that's where poor people shopped and that meant nothing he could've afforded as a not poor person would be found there. It was upsetting considering he had never set foot inside the establishment, Parker had only heard whispers of the unspeakable horrors that took place here. Sales and discounts existed here. He didn't know if he liked that or if it was the green light to run the other way. He laughed at kids that shopped at Walmart as a kid and now he had to actually go inside and try not to touch anything but what he came for.

It was going to be a valiant effort. He may not even come back alive. Steeling his nerves, Parker slowly got out of his porsche, let out a breath and marched towards the building with his chest puffed out with gusto and his ball cap worn backwards. Like he was a frat boy here for a beer run. Soon he was inside the establishment, glancing everywhere with a furtive of expression. He would not be touched, that was rule number one. People here probably had diseases and their perpetual poorness could rub off on him. So far though they looked normal, but perhaps that's what they wanted him to think. Then they'd leap in for the kill and drag his carcass back to their lair under a dumpster somewhere. it was his theory and he was going to stick with it.

The only problem with his plan was the fact that he had no idea where he was going in here. There was like a billion aisles and despite the plethora of people to choose from, which one was safe? Was there a safe zone here? What if his family never heard from him again? Letting out a breath, he balled his right hand into a fist and pounded on his chest. No. He was Parker Price. Destroyer of worlds and king of games, he would not be defeated by mere peasants of the common bred variety. He would succeed at great lengths to achieve his goal of acquiring mediocre coffee of the acceptable brand. He would live on, he would be a legend! He needed to move from where he was standing because he was blocking traffic.

Right. Letting out another breath, Parker shuffled forward, glancing anxiously at the aisles. Dairy. No. Chips. No. Where was the end to this madness? Finally he simply glanced about, feeling rather trapped, like he was in a box with no air. Parker Price would not suffocate in here, he would purify the air just by existing! Okay…maybe not that last one, that actually sounded kind of weird. He just needed to corner one of the peasants and receive information. Simple as that. After spotting one of the lone ones, he walked up, his expression of serious business before he acknowledged them. "Hey…so I'm new to this Walmart and I was wondering if you could tell me where I could find the coffee aisle?" There it had been said, now he just needed to wait for an answer.
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Joined: Jul 18 2016, 05:01 AM

Jul 24 2016, 06:51 AM #2

Emerson Lively wasn't a huge fan of grocery shopping, but if she wanted to eat, she needed to shop. Her parents having split up and moved into separate houses, she and Teddy essentially gained their own houses in the process -- each parent couple had a guest house. Emerson didn't know about Teddy, but she'd opted for the guest house at their dad's for herself. If there was anyone she despised less, it was her new stepfather -- even though she refused to consider him anything on the fatherly scale. Just because he married her dad didn't mean he was her new dad.

As long as they funded her living headquarters and let her do her own thing, she would be fine with it. Even though Emerson had plenty of grocery allowance to shop at some health food store, or at least Target, Walmart was the only place that carried a special kind of junk food she liked: Pocky. If she was feeling adventurous, she'd travel out to Indianapolis, but most days, Emerson preferred to stay in the town of Evergreen, because driving long distances had a mean way of making her tired. Plus, if she ever got too desperate, all she needed to do was hop onto Amazon and order away what she wanted. She could have done that this time, but she wanted her Pocky now, and even Amazon Prime's Next-Day Delivery couldn't satisfy that need.

The plan was simple: enter the store, go straight to the international aisle, grab several boxes of Pocky, checkout, exit the store. But her plans were interrupted by some guy walking toward her, and wow, was he cute. Emerson was tempted to offer him her number until he asked her about coffee. Coffee. Of all the things that were bad for the body, he had to be into coffee? An internal eye roll and groan was immediately transmitted from Emerson's brain to the rest of her body. Of course: guys were so hopeless these days, filled up on all the toxic things possible to do x and y, and was it too much to ask for just one guy in the universe who wasn't all about flooding his veins with such toxic substances?

"Coffee is usually near the cereal," Emerson replied, seemingly uninterested in the topic. "Do you want me to walk you there? It's kinda on my way." Do you need to be babied? is what she was really asking him.
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Parker Price
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Joined: Jul 21 2016, 08:00 AM

Jul 25 2016, 10:28 AM #3

So far his daring quest to boldly go into the vapid space that was Walmart wasn't going so bad. Sure there was still a million poor people running around with their overly sugared kids and Target brand attire but none of them had touched him or shown the slightest interest in him for that matter. He wasn't sure if he should feel feel offended or delighted that things were working outside far. And soon he came upon a pretty maiden that seemed to know what she was doing. Parker had to give her props for that after he figured out where to retrieve the coffee of course. "You have no idea how awesome that sounds, thank you." At least he wasn't screaming yes up into the rafters, before nodding vigorously.

Oh yes, this was going very well. "I've never…actually been in a Walmart before." Yeah it wasn't confessional time but she happened to be nice and he had a feeling that they might have had common ground or something. Or perhaps it was the fumes from the deli, that could've been it too. "I'm Parker Price by the way." Had to get off on the right foot and besides he had got what he wanted so far, might as well provide some stats to make this seem fair and all. "Are you a local? I've only been in town for the past six months myself." There wasn't much else he could offer besides undying gratitude given his down sized life plan at the moment. People just didn't understand how hard it was to be poor after being rich for so long. He didn't like it.

What he did like was coffee, so that he was awake for his afternoon shifts and not sneaking naps in the background. Good employees were actually chipper and hard working, which were two things that he did not gain from his parents but with coffee in his system he could at least give the allusion of both by walking around with things and conning customers into buying things because that's what good sales associates did at Gamestops. More games sold equaled more money for Parker. Even if they were games he wanted or something he had played and tried not to openly give his opinion on in the store unless it was asked for and not entirely a rant. Ranting was the best part of opinions, but his boss thought otherwise, which was a serious bummer.
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Joined: Jul 18 2016, 05:01 AM

Jul 25 2016, 10:47 PM #4

"There are signs on the ceiling, over the aisles, you know," Emerson noted as she walked with him, pointing up at the ceiling. Perhaps, if he was timid, he couldn't balance walking and looking up -- whatever the case, her impression of him thus far was weird; he couldn't be any younger than her, so his helplessness level was odd. He was also chattier -- obviously, this was more than a mere random act of helping someone else out; they were going to exchange names, and Emerson mentally crossed her fingers out of hope she wouldn't hear his whole life story by the time they arrived there.

And he drank coffee.

"Ah," Emerson sounded, exhaling slowly. "Emerson. Lively." She shrugged. "I gathered you might not be from around here when you mentioned you've never been in one before; they're pretty prominent here in the good, ole US-of-A…unless, of course, you're sheltered instead, in which case…my apologies." Emerson had heard her fair share of sheltered stories, and if there was anything her parents had made sure of in raising her and her brother, it was that they'd never be sheltered.

She took a little longer to answer his townie question, because it'd been a long time since she'd identified as a local, so the question caught her off guard. "Yeah." Emerson nodded. "Born and raised here in Evergreen -- from The Hills." Living in a rich neighborhood had to earn her at least some bragging rights; what was the point in living in such a place if not to at least brag about it on occasion? "I recently returned from England." But that was enough about her -- anymore and he'd probably assume she was trying to impress him. Emerson didn't live to impress members of the opposite sex.

"Why do you drink coffee? Why not fill your body with something less toxic, like fresh smoothies or something? I mean, Whole Foods and the like are more expensive, but in the end, it's less expensive than coffee -- especially when you work in the filters and coffee maker itself. At least with a blender, you can make more than just smoothies."
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Parker Price
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Joined: Jul 21 2016, 08:00 AM

Jul 28 2016, 02:23 AM #5

Parker had to admit that despite being the social butterfly that he was, Walmart intimidated the hell out of him. It wasn't that it was large or the fact that people could buy items here at low costs that weren't all that great in his opinion. It was the fact that Walmart was filled with people that had to actually have jobs to survive and didn't spend their summers in Martha's Vineyard. Damn he missed Martha's Vineyard. Anyone's vineyard at this point. And yes perhaps it was selfish. He couldn't be a trooper and run in and out like a wizard or whatever. Parker may have been been many things but a competent adult wasn't one of them. It was one of the main reasons he preferred the States. Many of his kind lived here and it was easy to blend in.

Now that he had dropped from the high life and was now narrowly dodging the bottom feeders, any sign of significant life was a god send. "Nah not sheltered. Just I'm used to…higher end places." And not shopping at all. That's what his people were for but then he had to let them go because he was lacking the funds to keep them. He never thought he'd have that problem. To not even have enough money to get a shirt tailored or go to Starbucks everyday. Ugh, missing Starbucks was the worst. They had just gotten his regular order down here and now he couldn't do a damn thing to come back and be their totally favorite customer again. What did he do deserve such a fate? Clearly the gods were looking down and laughing at his despair. Life fucking sucked.

The hills. He knew that place. He partied there not too long ago and now he was suddenly feeling a bit better than before. This girl was like him - loaded. Did she get cut off from her cash cow too? Was this some cruel experiments created by their parents to watch them squirm? How did he past that test? "Lovely to meet you Emerson, and ah England. Great place." His parents liked to visit London periodically. He was more accustomed to the night life though it wasn't too bad in the day time either. "I'm from Australia, though I've been to school here." It wasn't impressive he supposed but he hadn't had time to think about between being awesome and adulting. Gone were the days of the globe trotting Parker. Evergreen was how his hot spot. He needed more culture, but at least the town had a night club.

Emerson's coffee inquiry caused him to blink. Well…he didn't have a deep relationship with coffee but it kept him awake and came in various flavors of caffeine goodness. Somehow he didn't think that would work out as an argument though. "I dunno actually, I suppose it's because everyone else was drinking when I was younger and I hadn't really stopped…" Oh no he was actually thinking about it. Good news was his brain wasn't broken. "Smoothies…well if I knew how to make them I'd give them a shot." Saving money hadn't been a big deal until now. How much did it really save him in the long run though besides more than Coffee? Maybe it was a good idea though since it would be better for him. Logic was hard, but at least Parker was keeping up.
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Joined: Jul 18 2016, 05:01 AM

Aug 20 2016, 01:48 AM #6

“Right…” Emerson rolled her eyes and shook her head. “So you’re privileged.” She, too, was privileged, but she’d not say what he’d just said. Coming from money didn’t mean one had to be snobby and could never shop at stores with lower prices. Lower-priced things weren’t always horrible. If Parker was so privileged he didn’t know how to navigate Walmart, she assumed he was also stuck up—and maybe thinking and assuming she she was of the low-class citizens. He’d be wrong.

Emerson wasn’t cut off and wasn’t having to scrounge around for funds to pay her phone bill or shopping therapy or incessant gas usage from traveling to Indianapolis so much for the more organic products. She had money—she wasn’t a daddy’s girl for nothing. Her parents had always been into organic diets, with non-organic items in moderation, and she wasn’t complaining. She was better for it—healthier, even.

She didn’t make any comments on him having been to Australia. She had, too, but…she wouldn’t totally want to live there. She liked in the States, where there were more places that were fairly interesting than just one well-known city, but…well, she wasn’t all for fueling him to ramble on further about his life.

“You don’t know how to make smoothies?” Emerson blurted in disgust. “You literally prepare the fruits and throw them into a blender. I’ve been doing it since I was seven.” She exhaled deeply and tried to keep the rest of her berating thoughts to herself. “My parents are into self-sufficiency and healthy eating, with an emphasis on healing foods. It’s the key to living a long, fruitful life.” But at this rate, she figured he couldn’t care less about that. “Anyway,” she began, stopping in front of the coffee aisle, “Coffee aisle.” Emerson pointed in the direction of the coffee aisle, smiled at Parker, and disappeared down the aisle before it, which had her Asian snacks.
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