Obama Accepts Putin’s Invitation To Drinking Contest For Control of Ukraine

Obama Accepts Putin’s Invitation To Drinking Contest For Control of Ukraine

47K14,443
47K14,443

    May 10, 2014#1

    Obama Accepts Putin’s Invitation To Drinking Contest For Control of Ukraine



    PARIS, France — The
    world diplomatic community was stunned today when U.S. President Barack
    Obama accepted Russian President Vladimir Putin’s challenge to a
    drinking contest.

    The stakes: control of Ukraine, which Russian troops invaded several months ago.

    The Paris talks between the U.S. and Russia have been ongoing since
    the invasion but have often been strained to the point of open
    hostility. But none of the assembled diplomats and journalists could
    have predicted a drinking contest between the two most powerful men in
    the world.

    As aides cleared most of the room, leaving few reporters and neutral
    diplomats as witnesses, many bottles of alcohol were brought in. The two
    men exchanged awkward pleasantries and then began to drink. President
    Putin graciously allowed Mr. Obama to drink whatever alcohol he wanted,
    declaring that he, Putin, would restrict himself to only straight vodka.

    Conversation during the contest was strictly off the record but
    included topics such as soccer, windsurfing, proper execution of false
    flag operations and both leaders’ deep love for the Russian synth-pop
    band t.A.T.u.

    Four hours later, a half-naked, sweaty and pale-looking Obama was
    rolled out on a stretcher, his chair surrounded by empty Zima bottles.
    The president was vomiting every 30 seconds or so into a hotel ice
    bucket as his detail wheeled him to the waiting Marine One transport
    helicopter.

    For his part, Putin walked out of the room on his own power, still
    fully dressed in suit and tie, leaving empty vodka bottles in neat rows
    beside his chair. Putin announced he was a little peckish, and devoured a
    rack of yak ribs before going on a 10-mile jog and house-training a
    wild ocelot.

    What the contest’s outcome will mean to Ukraine and the Balkan region
    in general is not clear at this time. Russian diplomats refused to
    comment on the contest, but the U.S. Ambassador to Ukraine said he was “deeply concerned.
    "Give Me A Fast Ship For I Intend To Go In Harm's Way"




    During WWII no other Naval Unit eclipsed the record of the Little Beavers lead by Captain "31 Knot Arleigh Burke." There are Sailors and there are
    DESTROYER SAILORS. Fast sleek they seek out the enemy to engage at point blank range.




    "Neptune was God, Mahan his prophet, and the United States Navy the only true Church"

    3,1244

      May 11, 2014#2

      When the people fear their government, there is tyranny; when the government fears the people, there is
      liberty.






      -Thomas Jefferson

      6867

        May 11, 2014#3

        Hahaha. That is great

        36K3,607
        36K3,607

          May 11, 2014#4


          Good luck with that
          rank amatuer
          I Identify as a Conspiracy Theorist- My Pronouns are I/Told/You/So
          Wake Up
          (The ranter formerly known as midnightscum)

          https://www.americanpolicenews.com

          3,6298
          3,6298

            May 11, 2014#5

            I think I pulled an Obama last night...... no zima though!!!!!

            9322

              May 11, 2014#6

              SCU77 wrote:
              I think I pulled an Obama last night...... no zima though!!!!!
              What the heck were you doing at a Chicago bath house, brother? 
              On second thought...I don't want to know. 
              - OSC 

              43K5,526
              43K5,526

                May 11, 2014#7

                Next time he should challenge Fidel Castro, Obama might actually have a chance.
                “I come in peace,” Mattis recalled telling them. “I didn’t bring artillery. But I’m pleading with you, with tears in my eyes: If you fuck with me, I’ll kill you all.”

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