backslash
Mr. Danya
Joined: 1:59 AM - Feb 22, 2013

4:02 AM - Oct 19, 2017 #166

TheLordOfAwesome wrote:I imagine V1 SOTF branding is one of those things that have long since been retconned from the RP's lore, yes?

Damn shame too, because the idea of Danya pitching merchandising ideas is a funny mental image.

"SOTF-the T-shirt, SOTF-the Coloring Book, SOTF-the Lunch box, SOTF-the Breakfast Cereal, SOTF-the Flame Thrower! The kids love that one." - Danya
It's more or less been retconned, though there are instances in lore of people trying to market or capitalize on SOTF. It's just not something you could get away with these days and would come off as kind of silly.
"Art enriches the community, Steve, no less than a pulsing fire hose, or a fireman beating down a blazing door. So what if we're drawing a nude man? So what if all we ever draw is a nude man, or the same nude man over and over in all sorts of provocative positions? Context, not content! Process, not subject! Don't be so gauche, Steve, it's beneath you."
[+] Spoiler
V5:
G063 Natali Greer was just unlucky.
B047 Marcus Leung lost his way. (Adopted from Solomir.)

V6:
B001 Min-jae Parker is locked away.
B021 Crist?bal Morales let his guard down.
G017 Raina Rose got washed away.
G003 Bridgette Sommerfeld got a shock. (Adopted from Aloha.)
G029 Georgia Lee Day went home. (Adopted from frogue.)
Nathan Lovegrove was left behind.

V7 Pregame:
Myles Roux is considering his options.
Dolores Upton is exploring the past.
Andy Silverman is balling out.
Siyanda Nagi is on the run.
Mercy Ames is passing judgment.
[+] Spoiler
[+] Spoiler

[+] Spoiler
Quote
Like
Share

Blastinus
Player
Joined: 8:57 PM - Sep 19, 2008

4:38 AM - Oct 19, 2017 #167

Neville Eden is a kid with a Yorkshire accent, which is going to make reading his dialogue a load of fun. Fortunately, he provided a handy translation aid:
wrote:the=t’, you=tha/thee, girl=lass
And that's all you need to know, apparently.

His first thread is somewhat different, since he's already awake, just despondent. Apparently the terrorists let him keep his CD player, since he mentions having two CD's to listen to. Now I've had a Sony CD player, and I can say that he's probably going to get a couple days of use out of it, maybe three if he's lucky, but he's only got three more threads, so that shouldn't be an issue.

Next thread, he comes across Ryan Torres having a good cry, so, and I found this actually kind of interesting, he rehearses his friendly approach a few times before going in. This is a fun little detail and it gives Neville a bit more character. You know what also gives someone character?
wrote:"Nev' Eden. Are thi two toghether? I just got dropped; an' I ain't keen on shootin' owt. 'Less I have to."
Huh, this must be the advanced course. But in all seriousness, the Yorkishness isn't really that bad. It's not so thick that you can't get the gist of what he's saying, and it's consistent across the board. Offering Ryan their support, he and Clare Shepherd get him back on his feet and they become a steady alliance. None of them appear to be deranged or unstable, so at face value, the team ought to be fine. And indeed, as they take a break by the well and meet their first non-groupie in Dorian Greywood, they seem to have it together. Neville even muses to himself that he'd never be so harsh as to judge someone at face value, which is why he's immediately concerned when he sees the blood on Dorian's shirt, not suspicious.

But enough about that, it's time for Vince Samsa to cover the group in smoke and then unload his gun into the smoke, hitting not a dang thing (but leaving a few nicks). For his part, Neville's handler tries to actually sell this stupid trick, describing the smoke choking him and irritating his eyes. Everyone else is carrying on a conversation just fine and shooting at each other, but Neville? Bless his heart, he's trying to make this work. And props for that. But then Vince makes the error of inserting a lewd comment into his stupid pseudo-philosophical banter, and that's just not cool.

Though he offers to shoot Vince on behalf of Clare, his offer is rebuffed as Clare does the job for him, while taking a few rounds in the process herself and THEN being shot at randomly by a Slayer murderbot. Fortunately, Neville is standing over her, so he shields her body from these rounds, and he offers her a shoulder to get out of this scene while still under heavy fire. But then Peri shows up, and I'm like come on, people! This is the one crowd of decent people I've read, and so everyone's decided it's open season? Give them a freakin' break already!

Fortunately, they're able to get out of there before Peri starts his stupid shenanigans, and Neville enters an incredibly crowded scene, all bloodied and messed-up. But oops, it's a different Slayer murderbot. In true Slayer fashion, it's shoot first, think later, and as the two of them gun each other down in a hail of lead, with Clare assisting, Neville says a few poignant words and dies in Clare's arms. It's well-done and touching, and if it was against someone who wasn't constantly trying to hog the spotlight of every scene, it'd have been that much better.

Fact is, Neville deserved better than this. He was well-written, friendly, kind, and loyal to the end to his team. He got one nice quiet character moment and the rest was nonstop being shot at by pricks. I hate how many guns there were in V1, because everyone and their mothers had it in their heads that they needed to spray every single freakin' emotional scene with lead. I am honestly angry at Slayer for how many scenes he's ruined with his stupid characters and their stupid guns. They added nothing, and destroyed so much, leaving fun characters like Neville with no chance to grow. And there's the real tragedy.

One more please?
Quote
Like
Share

Randomness
Player
Joined: 10:40 PM - Nov 19, 2010

5:58 AM - Oct 19, 2017 #168

Elise's profile isn't bad, but it's still not great. That said this is the first v1 profile I've fully read, so take this with a grain of salt. Her appearance notes that people tell her that her hair is pretty, that she's plump but not fat, and how she wears black but isn't goth.

She's both poor but elitist, a combination that I honestly think is an interesting start for a character, but it's also coupled with androphobia/misandry, because she was bullied by boys before transferring to an all-girls school, an issue which I thoroughly assume is going to be explored in a manner that such a complex subject deserves. She's also an exchange student and has a reputation of having "an appreciation of violence", which I assume is v1 profile code for "likes beating shit up".

Elise playes out with more nuance than I expect, though she's surprisingly aware of what's going on. There's an offhanded statement about sorta knowing how guns work from video games, but you know Elise, World of Guns: Gun Disassembly only came out in 2014, so how well do you really know guns?

As she tests the gun, she notices one Peri Barclay, who is turning this into a holdup. He just wants the gun, and she starts out indignant, but turns fearful when he notes that he's already killed someone. As a note, as far as I've parsed his first post, he only found a body, but I actually can't make heads or tails of it. (Note from me from the future: he's a lying liar who lyingly lies and this becomes important later)

In any case, Elise makes this a strong scene, and if Peri's writing was better, she would be a recommendation from this scene alone. But once he actually robs her, Peri offers her a cigarette and an alliance, tossing her weapon back to her. From this point on, they work as an awkward duo, Peri being a dick in a way that seems more fitting for a forty year old than a sixteen year old kid, with Elise slowly realising that Peri's ideas are designed to keep him safe, and not her.

Later on, their time at the lookout point is interrupted by the arrival of Stevan, and he joins the group, leading Elise to become more paranoid about the two of them ganging up on her. As they enter the small house, she runs off with the gun that Peri had offered her earlier. She thinks she's okay, when Peri, who was chasing her this whole time, catches up. He shoots her in the legs, taking his gun back and leaves her for dead.

Somehow, she makes it to the hospital where the Doddsquad comes upon her. They are about to help her, when a gunfight breaks out due to the definitely coincidental arrivals, Stevan and Peri (Jacob was there too but he matters little to Elise's story). Most of them run and leave Elise, who is unable to follow. Stevan tortures her for a bit, before Peri interrupts them to stop Stevan, but in a confusing move, he tosses her back to Stevan who kills her.

In all, I think Elise is worth a read. Slight minus for having to suffer through the combined grammatical wreck that Peri and Stevan are and her voicework is inconsistent, but she has an interesting path, which is very self contained, as well as several interesting ideas, though many of which are never explored as much as I'd like. Her death thread is the main flaw in an otherwise strong character. The gunfight is largely skippable if you are reading her as she posts only once during it, but really, shame on the Doddsquad for leaving her behind.

Give me another kid that I can procrastinate on.
"I have the heart of a young boy. I keep it in a jar on my desk" -- Stephen King
[+] Spoiler
[+] Spoiler
G040 - Amanda Tan
Pregame 1-2
Island 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-END

B039 - Jordan Green
Pregame 1
Island 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10-END
[+] Spoiler
DECEASED Stephanie Wright
DECEASED Grace Faraday
It's the Grand Map of Doom! v6
Quote
Like
Share

Inge
Player
Inge
Player
Joined: 9:02 PM - Mar 29, 2013

6:59 AM - Oct 19, 2017 #169

Blastinus: Andrew Lipson

Randomness: Cillian Crowe
[+] Spoiler
Serena Waters
Will Mckinley
[+] Spoiler
Seth Dunn
Sean Leibowitz
I do let's plays on my youtube channel here.
Quote
Like
Share

Aura
Winner
Aura
Winner
Joined: 6:39 PM - Dec 09, 2011

7:29 AM - Oct 19, 2017 #170

Kouji Ginsenshi is a character who I can't really describe the way I talk about most characters that I have reviewed on the RAT, so bear with me for a moment while I explain my reaction to him.

First off, I will say straight-out that Kouji is not a good character. Far from it, in fact. His biography is absurd, his personality is ridiculous, and his first three posts are absurdly similar to each other barring a few words. As soon as he runs into someone, he tries way too hard to be a ruthless, badass tough guy, but when he fails to follow through, he comes off as an utter buffoon instead. The best case of this would be in his waterfall encounter with Eh-Sun, which ends up looking like a total farce by the end of it. This comes to a head in his final thread, where Scott Jameson is attacking Jeremy Torres with a brick about ten feet away, and Kouji just stands there thinking about soup.

These sort of writing and tonal issues are the kind of thing that I would normally rip into a character for, but I just can't do that with Kouji. For you see, Kouji was the most fun I have had reading any v1 character thus far by a wide margin. He's very bad, but unlike a lot of bad v1 characters who are just bland, uncomfortable, or shock value, Kouji ends up being hilarious. I would go so far to call him the v1 equivalent of The Room. He was just a delight to read, and he really cheered me up after a not-so-great day.

However, there was one thing that I took issue with in Kouji's story. In his final thread, the other handlers were clearly unhappy with his handler. Nevera's handler even went so far as to suggest that Kouji's handler quit the site and let Nevera kill Kouji. After that, all the other characters in the thread teamed up and started attacking Kouji, much to his handler's bafflement. Now, this is something that I was definitely not okay with, and it was really uncomfortable to read. Yes, Kouji's handler was not a good writer, but to go after him in that way was completely uncalled for, and it was very unpleasant to watch.

As Blast said in the chat while I was reading Kouji, a good improv actor will run with someone else's terrible idea and make something great out of it, while a bad improve actor will break character and complain about the other guy's bad idea. That was what happened in Kouji's final thread, and it absolutely should not have come to that. Kouji was by no means the only ridiculous character in v1, and even if he had been, there was no reason for them to go after his handler like that. So it soured his story right at the end. I remember he argument more than Kouji's inactive death, actually.

Also, apparently Kouji came back to life briefly when his handler posted with him again after his death due to a misunderstanding of the rules. Nobody acknowledged him in-character and nothing came of it aside from a brief bit of confusion.

So would I recommend Kouji? The surprising answer is... yes. Absolutely. He's an absolute blast, flaws and all. His story is ridiculous, it makes no sense, and Kouji himself is just a treasure trove of memorable quotes. It's a bit soured by the drama at the end, but I can say with 100% certainty that I do not regret reading him at all.

Another character, if you please.

[+] Spoiler
v5 Characters:

B029- Matt Masters- DECEASED (114/152)

B043- Adonis Alba- DECEASED (124/152)

G051- Stacey Mordetsky- DECEASED (136/152)
Quote
Like
Share

Blastinus
Player
Joined: 8:57 PM - Sep 19, 2008

8:13 AM - Oct 19, 2017 #171

When I read Andrew Lipson, it becomes immediately clear to me what role he's supposed to take in the narrative of Adam Dodd. He's got the love interest who serves just as a motivator for revenge, the mentor figure who sacrifices himself for him, and now we have the tragic friend who establishes that Dodd is a caring and compassionate person but is ultimately disposable. As a wheelchair-riding character who was apparently abducted as a separate victim just so handicapped viewers would have someone to root for (I'm not making this up), it's fairly clear right from the start that Dodd has no intention of actually having Andrew make it all the way to the end. Instead, his goal is to milk as much tragedy as he can from a single character in the hopes of creating the forum equivalent of Oscar Bait.

Case in point, he starts out buried in a ditch so he can only struggle and shout for help. He's helped up and into his wheelchair by Umi Martin, and as people file in, he spends most of his time just saying "Hi, I'm Andrew." More and more people show up and are typically confrontational, so he just remarks how weird it is that nobody can get along, and he laments that he isn't good for anything, when that's clearly wrong. He's in a wheelchair, yes, but as long as he has an ally to wheel him around, all he needs is a gun and you've got yourself a mobile artillery platform that looks like a man. The closest we come to a spark of character is that Umi used to know him before the accident that crippled him, and she makes him feel bad about how he's declined since then. He agrees. He friggin' agrees, and right when I'm about to seriously get angry at this character, he gets the call from Adam Dodd...somehow. They make plans to meet up, but it's once again just Dodd talking to himself, and that's when his arm gets burned to a crisp by a bolt of lightning.

Oh right, here's the main thing that Andrew Lipson is known for. He gets struck by lightning which burns one side of his body, his wheelchair shorts out so he rolls off a cliff, he reflects on his life on the way down, lands, shatters a bunch of things but doesn't die, and is left lying broken on the beach, where the tide comes in and he drowns. Rather than doing something dignified or subdued, Dodd just had to go for the whole nine yards of misery, and it doesn't work that way. If you keep layering on tragic thing after tragic thing, there's a diminishing return for each layer. If he'd just had him roll off the cliff and die on impact, that would have been good right there. He had the time for reflection, he had the song number (for what THAT'S worth). End scene right there, and it's fine. Having him survive that just to drown slowly, painfully, and miserably doesn't make you deep or clever. It just makes you a mean spirited jerk.

I would not recommend Andrew Lipson. It's a cheap attempt to shock and elicit sympathy, and you're better off just reading the synopsis on the wiki.

One more please.
Quote
Like
Share

Inge
Player
Inge
Player
Joined: 9:02 PM - Mar 29, 2013

4:21 PM - Oct 19, 2017 #172

[+] Spoiler
Serena Waters
Will Mckinley
[+] Spoiler
Seth Dunn
Sean Leibowitz
I do let's plays on my youtube channel here.
Quote
Like
Share

Inge
Player
Inge
Player
Joined: 9:02 PM - Mar 29, 2013

7:15 PM - Oct 19, 2017 #173

Alright, a switch has been made.

Ruggahissy now has Madelaine Shinohara and Aura Master Fox now has Martyn Ferdinand.
[+] Spoiler
Serena Waters
Will Mckinley
[+] Spoiler
Seth Dunn
Sean Leibowitz
I do let's plays on my youtube channel here.
Quote
Like
Share

Blastinus
Player
Joined: 8:57 PM - Sep 19, 2008

10:57 PM - Oct 19, 2017 #174

Well, at least now I know why Jimmy Moreland came on so hard with Chi when he met her. The guy's profile lists him as a young playboy, hitting on every girl he meets. Coming at it from his perspective, he seems to be almost a bit pathetic, trying desperately to hit on a girl who's clearly not that interested in him. Then a wild Slayer character appears, and we know how that goes. They fight for a bit, and then they flee. Chi's becoming increasingly erratic and strange, and Jimmy's really not into it. So when she gives him the option, they go their separate ways.

Final thread for Jimmy, he comes across Blaine Eno. Blaine immediately sets off Jimmy's weirdness alarms, but mostly out of that desire to get some allies, he plays along, which turns out to be a tactical error, since Blaine has a nasty case of the crazies. Word to the wise: if someone asks you to give them your hand in this game, chances are they're speaking 100% literally. Panicking, but unable to escape, Jimmy is sectioned off the rest of the way while hallucinating a really bizarre and unusual nightmare. To guitarjack87's credit, even though I have no idea what's going on, at least I remember this death. Can't really say whether or not I'd recommend Jimmy, since he's constantly taking backseat to weird or psychotic characters, playing straight man to their antics. I feel like he was competently written and I felt for him when he was trapped in a room with Blaine, but there just wasn't enough of him to get a real opinion.

Let's keep on going.
Quote
Like
Share

Inge
Player
Inge
Player
Joined: 9:02 PM - Mar 29, 2013

11:04 PM - Oct 19, 2017 #175

Blastinus: Cody Jenson
[+] Spoiler
Serena Waters
Will Mckinley
[+] Spoiler
Seth Dunn
Sean Leibowitz
I do let's plays on my youtube channel here.
Quote
Like
Share

Blastinus
Player
Joined: 8:57 PM - Sep 19, 2008

5:36 AM - Oct 20, 2017 #176

Well, nuts. Cody Jenson has been worming his way through so many of these stories, it's almost intimidating to have to deal with the man himself. Of one thing I am assured, Cody is perhaps the most prolific of characters in the entirety of V1, managing with one character to be a match for Dodd's entire cadre. Does that mean I like him as a character? Oh, heavens, no. But the impact he made on the story is tremendous, and that deserves a long, hard, look.

So without further ado, let's get this over with.
[+] Spoiler
Cody Jenson's backstory is super important to his character on the island, since it shows him being beaten out for the chance to go pro by one Sidney Crosby. Bitter, angry, and building within him the seeds of revenge, Cody is at his absolute worst when he comes to the island, and that factors heavily into how he acts. That being said, he doesn't make a very convincing first impression, since he catches Marcus Roddy (another guiterjack87 character) in a snare trap and beats him until he falls into another thread. No clues on how Marcus escapes, but I guess that's supposed to establish Cody's savagery and petty nature. Or something.

Next thread, he encounters Max McNeal and immediately attacks him, demanding to know if he has a gun. Once Max reveals that, no, he doesn't have a gun, Cody just attacks him for no good reason and the two of them are broken up by Shinya. As Shinya threatens to shove Cody into the ravine, Cody's handler accuses his handler of GMing and then tries to attack a guy who actually has a gun with hand-to-hand combat, earning a bullet for his troubles. But it's okay, he just cut one of his fingers in half. No reason why Cody's rampage can't last another...18 threads.

Oh boy.

So next thread, Cody's finger is all bandaged but still bleeding. Let's assume that he lost a fair amount of blood from that, and he's been running with nothing but friggin' bread to sustain him. I want to keep track of Cody's injuries, because I don't think his handler did. Anyway, a girl named Mallory DeLuca trips over him, he tries to force her to stay, but then Mallory's handler gets bored and she leaves. Then Cody leaves, because he's about to encounter the love of his life in motorcycle form. Yes, it's Loretta the Magical Motorbike. And thank goodness too, because Cody's knee injury that he'll conveniently forget whenever a fight breaks out is making it difficult for him to walk. I just want to emphasize how bizarrely coincidental this all is. Somehow, under a tarp, in a shed, in an island that, I should mention, Sydney Morvran claims was the staging area for games before this, lurks a motorcycle that's in pristine condition with brand-new tires. Naturally, he treats this irreplaceable treasure with the respect and care it deserves by plowing it right through the shed door. I hope his knee isn't sensitive to shocks or anything, because that seems like it would have hurt.

Oh, almost forgot to mention, the terrorists let him keep a book of matches and some cigars. Because clearly, there's no possible benefit to having a fire source. I'm beginning to notice that Cody does a lot of things because they're cool, not because they would make any kind of logical sense. But anyway, his finger is apparently still bleeding and such, so he appeals to the Angharad and Jacob Starr standoff to supply him with some antiseptic and proper bandages, but they're too busy yelling at each other in both IC and OOC, and a bunch of other characters show up in anticipation of some weirdo named Dodd arriving, whoever he is. But enough about that, since Jacob Starr just locked the warehouse doors, trapping him inside while somehow nobody else steals his bike. Oh right, and here's a detail I missed the first time: apparently when he went in to kiss Amanda, her shotgun being pressed against his groin made him hard. And that's...why couldn't Amanda have just blown his nuts off there and spared us from this stupidity? I guess someone hit him in the back of the head with a crowbar, so he can just die of a traumatic brain injury instead.

No such luck I'm afraid, as a freaky dream sequence informs him that he's still got more killing to do before he springs up and disgorges everything he's eaten plus a bit more blood. So yeah, that's a concussion, most likely, one that he'll presumably also be writing off in the near future. The odd thing about the dream is that it implies that somehow he knows that Sidney Crosby is on the island, because a dream version of Danya tells him as much. And so, with his head pounding, with his knee injury, with his finger presumably still bleeding, he manages to get to his bike and not crash into anything as he drives out of the scene and into the next one, where all he does is listen to the announcement and drive on, but not before leaving us with this odd tidbit:
wrote:Sometimes, the juice is worth the squeeze, you know.
Apparently he's convinced that Sidney Crosby is on the island because of Dream Danya. He's right, but he really shouldn't be. The implication seems to heavily be that Danya somehow knew that Cody would need a rival, because there's no other reason for Crosby to be here besides that. I mean, imagine if Cody had died before any of this. Imagine that. What would have been the point of abducting a pro hockey player then? But that hardly matters now, does it, because Cody roars onto a scene of a recent kill to pull a Bobby Jacks, by which I mean he enters a scene just to steal a recent victim's bag and then leave. But hey, that means that Cody finally has a handgun, which means he can join the elite club of "Psychos who join scenes to shoot at people".

And indeed, in the very next thread, he comes driving down the road and, while driving, fires at the folks in his way. I'm no expert on finger dismemberment, but I'm reasonably certain that either task would be difficult to do one-handed with a concussion, especially if you're missing a finger on one of those hands. But enough about that, it's time for Cody to use both f-words in a single sentence. Because if his other qualities weren't shining enough, his handler had to also throw in casual homophobia. After doing a pass on the group, he swings the bike off the road in order to sneak back and ambush them, but he changes his mind because he's infatuated with one of the potential victims. I kid you not.
wrote:Cody shook his head. This was no time to be thinking like that! He had things to do and people to kill.

She was very pritty though.

veeeery pritty...
This only makes the following scene even worse. It's his kill of Madelaine, along with...that. I thought that I'd feel something, having followed Cody up until now, but the guy's only actions have been attacking people, creeping on people, hating people, and so on, so if anything, my opinion of him was already at rock bottom. There is literally nothing, NOTHING likable about Cody Jenson, and having his first kill be a thoroughly repugnant rape scene just made me realize how much I'm tired of this guy. The man has nothing to offer in the ways of entertainment or intrigue. He's not strange or complicated. He has no sympathetic moments thus far. His very existence drags down every scene he's in. I don't care about his rivalry with Sidney Crosby. I just want him gone.

Oh yeah, and I guess he killed Amanda too, plus he took a bullet in his arm, which means that he's lost even more blood, but that's okay, because he washed his wounds in a creek. He then does some stupid chant which came out of nowhere. I guess he's become the patron saint of murder now or something. Also, we get a brief glimpse of Vince Samsa in this thread, but the gist of it is that Cody's not sharing his weapons and he's also planning more murder. Hardly matters that they separated because Vince ends up in the very next thread, along with the love of Cody's life, ol' whatsherface.
wrote:Gotta do him quick, then I can squeeze some shots off at dumbo there, and then I'll take the girls. Kill the bimbo. Keep Lyndi. Love Lyndi.

Love Lyndi.
Right, Lyndi. That's it. A bullet scrapes his neck during this fight, but he's able to back the group up to the point where Fred Hughes tries to take him one on one while Cody rants in his stupid way. During the fight, Cody gets smashed in his hand, his forearm, and his ribs, and lest we forget, he's missing a finger and has a bum knee, but he's still able to pull out a victory, and then he beats up Vince Samsa (albeit with his permission) before finally rounding on Lyndi. Cody's handler tries to give him a sympathetic scene with him promising Lyndi he'd never hurt her, but he raped someone to death, so who cares? And of course it's just a setup for him crippling her and dragging her off against her will when she resists, because we needed even MORE creepiness from this character.

Sure enough, somehow, dragging along a girl, with shattered ribs, missing a finger, with a concussion, he's still riding his motorcycle. What's more, even with his knee injury, he's able to shoot at a group in front of him while taking off at a run. Naturally, the ensuing fight scene results in him being sexually aroused, BECAUSE OF COURSE IT DOES! You want to know why that is? Turns out that, in a ridiculously over-the-top flashback to when he was a kid, a man shot his wife and then himself in a restaurant, causing all the nearby cars to spiral out of control, resulting in a man crashing into a telephone pole which fell down and split Cody's mother in half, causing his little boy self to develop an erection. I couldn't make any of this up if I tried. Also, modern day him is cradling his motorcycle. But at least the upside is that Lyndi got away from all this nonsense, so there's something.

Next thread, Adam Dodd passes out in front of him, and he somehow knows that Adam Dodd is the greatest hero that SOTF has ever seen. Ooooookay? How? The announcements wouldn't have said so, and he's only barely met Dodd face to face. But regardless, he takes this opportunity to immediately put a hatchet in Dodd's head, but not really, because that was actually a super clever fakeout. Right. Instead, he bandages up Dodd because "it's not the right time" yet, whatever that means. And it's time for another flashback. This time, his mother becomes super fat after his dad leaves the family to the point where he has to take care of her, and he suffocates her with peanut butter. Wait what? a) How is his mother still alive in one constituent whole after the previous flashback? b) How did he not immediately go into foster care or juvie, and c) Why is he a murderous psycho as a kid? This makes no sense, and it's needlessly evil, and I think at this point, we can safely say that Cody Jenson is not a person so much as a Hate Elemental wearing the skin of an actual person.

And get this, when Dodd wakes up, Cody tries to pal around with him under a fake name. Once again, ONLY BECAUSE Cody has never truly met him and would have no idea that Adam Dodd is this big hero, it actually works. Naturally, Adam spends the entire scene talking about Sidney Crosby and how the two of them are after this no-good bottom feeder hockey player named Cody Jenson. What a loser, right? Because the plot says he has to keep it together in this scene, he lets Adam's comments slide without jumping out at him, only to try accusing HIM of being a terrible killer. And you know what this scene is? This is Adam Dodd getting a chance to justify himself in front of the haters, since all the accusations coming from Cody can be immediately refuted because he's a psycho himself while Adam gets a chance to do a longwinded monologue about how everything he did was 100% justified and cool.

Oh also, Cody hacks up more blood and bile at this point because of his shattered ribs, so just chalk that one up on the injury counter. It's at this point that guitarjack87 passes on control to Megami, so Cody spontaneously breaks character as Adam storms off in order to do an evil villain laugh that makes him spew EVEN MORE blood out. Next thread, he reflects on how he really wants to kill Sidney, and end scene. I think that Megami's trying to find the right voice for Cody, so they're doing this oneshot to get acclimated before continuing his game. But I'm not sure that Megami has the right idea, since in the next thread, he's monologuing like he's the Joker before attacking Elsie, and then this happens:
wrote: In one fell swoop, Cody Jenson swung the axe and all Elsie Darroch saw was the gleam of the blade, followed by an intense black, as Cody completely severed her mid-section in half with the weapon. Elsie continued to stand for a moment, as if dumbfounded, before finally both her top and bottom half fell to the ground with a loud thump.
And with that, we've gone from a vile psycho to basically a supervillain. A delusional one at that, since he finds the dead body of Lyndi and does this weird schtick about how he thinks she's still alive and that he'll protect her from yada yada. I'm sure Megami is a good writer, but this is not Cody.

But oh no, the true tragic death of V1 happens in the very next thread, as Loretta finally runs out of gas, leaving Cody heartbroken and in denial. His valiant steed can serve him no more, and he has a good cry over it. All of these previous threads have been oneshots, by the way, including this next one where he monologues at and kills off Clemence the psycho ballerina. This particular death is so over-the-top it's kinda lame, since he stabs a dagger into her hand, chops it off, and stabs her with the dagger hand. Come on people, we're not writing V2 yet.

Finally, saying goodbye to Loretta, he goes off on his mission to kill Adam Dodd and Sidney Crosby, and you got the highlights from when I talked about Sid the Kid. Considering all the injuries he had, it's downright ridiculous that he managed to even win against Sidney, let along Dodd. But I'm guessing that Megami forgot about all the things afflicting him, since if they were accurately representing how he would have looked with everything that had happened, he'd have basically been a shambling corpse that would have been toppled with a stiff breeze. But you know, big hero's gotta have his climactic boss fight, no matter how little sense it makes.
Would I recommend Cody Jenson? Maybe? I absolutely hated him. Hated everything about him, but he's an important part of V1's history. Most of what he does is thoroughly skippable after the baton is passed, and I would never recommend Madelaine's death, or anything having to do with Lyndi, or the stuff about his backstory, or...You know what, no, don't read Cody Jenson. Just skip ahead to endgame and forget everything else about him. You'll have saved yourself so much time that way.

Well, roll 'em again. Here's hoping for someone actually fun.
Quote
Like
Share

Randomness
Player
Joined: 10:40 PM - Nov 19, 2010

5:40 AM - Oct 20, 2017 #177

Cillian Crowe is lazy writing and I really don't like him. The profile is not the greatest start, from how the descriptions are overly lavish in how they describe him, to the fact that the clothing desccription starts "Clothing wise, Cillian hasn't had much luck".

His back story is just a mishmash of tragic things that focus on some potentially demonic creature called "Haddy". He suddenly becomes your classic creepy child who starts doing more and more creepy things. His parents (always called "the foster parents" in the profile) leave him 10 miles away from home in an attempt to leave him behind. Apparently, they could only spare their lunch break for this and wanted an actual lunch on the way back, because 10 miles? Really?

Anyway Cillian takes months to get back home, probably having some wacky murder adventures along the way (ten miles?), and decides to kill his parents. With them dead, he was sent to Arkham Asylum with unethical psychiatrists(?) unable to diagnose him(?). Also somehow they had let him grow long nails and couldn't get them cut short, because he would claw people with them.

I'm not going to give Cillian a story summary, because I've actually forgotten most of it despite having just finished reading him. His kills blur together, the overwrought childish mannerisms, the weird mood, tone, tense whiplashes, make Cillain bland and difficult. In every horror movie, there tends to be at least one death that stands out by being either ridiculous or well executed, but Cillian feels monotonous in quality throughout. There's no motivation for murder beyond the voice in his head, there's some mild strain of paranoia, but it never does anything beyond trying (and failing) to pull at heartstrings for his treatment by the psychiatrists.

There are a few flashbacks, in blue on the blue background of invisionfree, but these are generally paint-by-numbers affairs, as if someone was pulling ideas out of a list of things that belong in a tragic backstory. Authoritarian father, men in labcoats, child abuse, things thst might work but placed where it is, admist Cillain's story, feels like a gross mismatch.

What makes things worse is that I can see glimmers of good writing in Cillian. But the fact is, when it comes down to it, there's really nothing that elevates Cillian beyond a simple stereotype of a madman. He's not even fun in his madness, and he is often too predictable in his next move (it's always murder).

One more.
"I have the heart of a young boy. I keep it in a jar on my desk" -- Stephen King
[+] Spoiler
[+] Spoiler
G040 - Amanda Tan
Pregame 1-2
Island 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-END

B039 - Jordan Green
Pregame 1
Island 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10-END
[+] Spoiler
DECEASED Stephanie Wright
DECEASED Grace Faraday
It's the Grand Map of Doom! v6
Quote
Like
Share

Inge
Player
Inge
Player
Joined: 9:02 PM - Mar 29, 2013

9:41 AM - Oct 20, 2017 #178

Blastinus: Shannon McLocke

Randomness: Cleo Barston
[+] Spoiler
Serena Waters
Will Mckinley
[+] Spoiler
Seth Dunn
Sean Leibowitz
I do let's plays on my youtube channel here.
Quote
Like
Share

Bowser
Survivor
Joined: 5:33 PM - May 09, 2013

5:48 PM - Oct 20, 2017 #179

Daphne Rudko is awful and quite possibly some of the worst that V1 has to offer in my opinion. Everything about her two thread arc (Because lbr her first thread is completely pointless) is infuriating to read and honestly just left me wanting to yell at my screen at how stupid both Daphne and the people around her acted. Worst part is I knew she was going to be awful from the start, and even after finishing I still felt disappointed.

Starting with Girls #15-GAME START, the useless thread, we learn that she killed her parents because her dad abused her and some random girl who "Bullied" her. But considering how she randomly kills three people in what she claims to be self defense even though there was no reason for her to murder any of them I'm willing to bet she just panic murdered all three of them over something stupid every single time. She then talks with some boy for like a few posts and then they both just ditch the thread I guess.

Next up in the thread Advent, Daphne runs into Jeremy's group which consisted of himself, Glenn, Marie, Heather, and Fred after the group encounters the body of Gabrielle Minase. When questioning her on if she's the one who killed him, she says "Well I killed my dad and some random girl who bullied me, and my mom who was totally innocent, but I haven't killed anyone yet" and then keeps saying a bunch of shit that would make anyone think she was going to start murdering everyone around her and that they should just end her now. But for SOME REASON they do nothing about the confessed killer even after she slits Marie's throat for the crime of approaching her and trying to be nice. Heather's then all "Okay this bitch is crazy" and leaves the scene by slipping down a hill with everyone just abandoning the thread behind her as they give chase lol. All alone in the thread, Daphne then leaves to go hide in a bush.

That's not even a joke by the way, her stint in the thread arrival literally starts with her hiding in a bush, Eddie LIGHTLY kicking a rock into said bush, and Daphne thinking he's trying to kill him and stabbing him in the throat. Because reasons. Miranda's then all "OH SHIT!" and tries to run away, only for Daphne to brutally stab her to death thinking both kills were in self defense. I'm not even kidding by the way, every time she kills somebody she thinks she's acting in self defense and that everyone is out to get her when in reality she's the one causing her own problems. Nobody's causing Daphne issues but Daphne. None of the people she killed were in any way hostile towards her and two of them were even trying to hatch an escape plan. Which brings me to quite possibly my biggest issue with Daphne, her death.

See, after Daphne killed Miranda, Heather shoots her like three times and Glenn flashbangs her, blinding her for a bit. Glenn then goes inside to finish the job with a 2 by 4 about to kill her and she's all "Lol you're just like me" and he's basically all "You killed my friend and two other people who did nothing to you right in front of me, and you pose a threat to my friends as well. I'm nothing like you" and I'm sitting there rooting for Glenn to kill her ass. Seriously Daphne has caused nothing but pain and suffering to Glenn and those around him, and with him and his group trying to get an escape going. Him killing her would of made sense on both a story and morality level since leaving her alive would of only lead to more people Glenn was trying to save dying and her whole arc directly involved indirectly hurting Glenn. It would of been a great end to an awful character, would of redeemed her story somewhat, and pushed Glenn's forward in intresting ways. But, of course, a bunch of randos have to walk in all "GLENN DON'T DO IT, YOU'LL BE JUST AS BAD AS HER!"

So he doesn't kill her.

Then two seconds later Jason walks in and shoots her dead.

And I'm just sitting here wondering why Glenn couldn't of just gotten the kill when everything was pointing towards him being the best one to do it. I just... Why?

In short, Daphne sucks and you shouldn't read her. End of story

I'll take another character please.
Quote
Like
Share

Blastinus
Player
Joined: 8:57 PM - Sep 19, 2008

6:00 PM - Oct 20, 2017 #180

Shannon McLocke is another one of the terrorists who performed an act so phenomenally stupid that they got themselves volunteered as tributes. While it's Elijah Rice who actually plops his soda can down on the public address button, it's McLocke who distracts him by looking at the fanfiction online, so really, there's plenty of blame to go around. For his part, McLocke is described as a smug jerk with a weird exercise regimen, so of the three, he's probably the least sympathetic, and therefore the most expendable.

Case in point, after the thread that puts the terrorists in play, he's only got two threads to his name, of which the first is a simple oneshot with no dialogue where he stabs Ai Kurosawa in the arm and then slits her throat. Once again, they can't talk, so I wasn't expecting a lot of villain monologues, but this is really minimalist in terms of how he approaches it. I suspect this is because Shannon is being controlled by Kaishi instead of the incredibly longwinded Dodd.

Not to say this thread gets off entirely scot-free. There's always this delightful quip:
wrote:The knife left a nasty mark, unleashing a strong spray of blood. This is why the audience is given vomit bags, my dears. SOTF brand plastic and paper bags for all occasions.
Imagine the possibilities for bootleg SOTF merch. You could have replica weapons, action figures, "greatest hits" tapes for the character of your choice...Sure, it'd be in horrible taste, but I can't imagine bootleggers would care much about that.

In his last thread, true to his cocky nature, he walks right up to the alliance of Steven Hyde and Peri Barclay and just dares them to take the first move. This turns out to be a bit of an error, as he's now set upon by three kids at once since Eh-Sun also joins the party. I suppose this is true to his smug and cocky nature, but it doesn't end up doing him any favors. He ends up killing none of them and getting the snot beaten out of him before finally deciding to go out with a bang, setting off his collar right next to a bandolier of grenades which go up in a giant succession of booms. I will say that this fight scene is a great chance for Steven, Peri, and Eh-Sun to show off, since they finally have an opponent who is unambiguously okay to fight. The terrorists are kind of like boss fights where any of the characters can participate and feel 100% justified in doing so, and I wish that there were more occasions like this, since it's definitely cathartic to read.

Let's keep going!
Quote
Like
Share