Mr. Danya's Guide to Survival

Mr. Danya
Joined: September 22nd, 2006, 2:13 am

October 3rd, 2006, 2:55 am #1

Well hello, children! I'm absolutely, positively thrilled that you've chosen to read over this wonderful book that I've so laboriously crafted just for you -- it could be the difference between life and death, you see. The fact that you've even opened this book tells me one thing about you: you're smart. Perhaps smarter than I've given you credit for. Within this guide are some key facts you'll need to know in order to survive on this island... or should I say, perhaps prolong your lives a bit longer. What you'll need to survive, most of you don't have. However, little warriors, I'll get on with it.

The Collars.
So, what do you all need to know about the collars this go around? They're waterproof, they're shockproof, and they aren't removable. But don't take my word for it, please, try to remove them. You'll experience a rather painful demise. You see, much like the first model we used, these collars are also tamper-proof, and explode when messed with, effectively leaving a nice big gap where your neck used to be. As those of you who watched the previous SOTF might've noticed, the design's a bit different -- don't let it fool you, they're still just as menacing and lethal as ever.

The collars are a vital part of our little experiment here. They monitor your pulses. Don't be lulled into a false sense of security, children. We know where you are and what you're doing at all times. Just because we aren't responding doesn't mean we aren't watching you. If you cause us trouble, we can easily have you disqualified from the game... in a rather grisly and unpleasant manner, I might add. Keep that in mind before attempting yet another futile and pointless escape plan.

Danger Zones.
We can't have you all camping out in a certain location until the end of time, now can we? I'll be announcing new danger zones and clearing others during every announcement, so be on your toes. Don't linger anywhere for too long, that's almost ensuring that that area will become a danger zone. I've got to keep you kids on the run, you see. A spooked herd stampedes more easily, and all that jazz.

Morning Announcements.
You know, children, I make the announcements for your own good, so it would be in your best interests to listen, and listen intently. I'll be giving you a list of all of your fallen friends. I might even tell you who killed them, if I'm in the mood. Then you can enact exact retribution upon their murderer and all that good stuff. Makes for good ratings, you know. Not only will I give you a tally of the dead, but I'll also tell you which areas are becoming restricted. Take heed of that, children, because once an area becomes restricted, you're sealing your own fate by lingering within.

Kill or Be Killed.
Twenty-four hours. If we've not had at least one death over the course of one day, you'll all die. Doesn't seem fair, does it? That's why you should take the initiative, children, and make sure that at least one person dies every day. They say collar explosion is a very painful way to go. Not that I would know. Regardless, it would work in your favor to make sure that the kill count is met. I'd hate to have this game end prematurely, you see. It costs me ratings, and loss of ratings costs me money.

You might've noticed the cameras mounted in various places across the island. Much like the original SOTF, this one is being broadcast nationwide. Remember, kiddos, you're on television, so play to the crowd! This is a blood sport in the darkest sense of the word, and people are watching for the carnage they expect you to unleash. Don't disappoint me. On the subject of cameras, it's also safe to remind you that you're being watched at all times -- not only by me, but by people around the world. Do something interesting, little warriors, make me proud!

Take Heed of Others.
I leave you with these parting words. It may seem like a great idea to team up with friends and attempt to take on the system. Remember -- you aren't the first person to have this ingenius idea, and odds are, you won't be the last. You can't defeat me. Groups seem smart. They aren't. There's always a weak link. Always someone who can't be trusted. Just because you aren't willing to do unto others, children, doesn't mean that others out there are so kind. This is a game about deceit. It's a game about murder. Be wary of others. Could you kill your best friend? ... What if your best friend could kill you?