Mr. Danya
Joined: May 26th, 2007, 12:17 am

August 11th, 2014, 10:02 pm #16


The Book of Life looks really good. Write a story about the afterlife of the party. 200 words.
199 words.

Louis's 8th 10th birthday was all fun and games until Jerald took Louis's eye.

Mr. Peacock quickly broke up the scuffle with a leering snarl. "What's all this ruckus?"

"He took my eye." Louis said, streaming tears and blood and vitreous humour.

"Your eye? Who took your eye?"

Louis sniffed and pointed at Jerald. The eye was still connected to the cord and Jerald seemed more interested in chewing that than the eye itself. Mr. Peacock scraped his bony fingers down Jerald's face.

"Jerald, give your brother back his eye." Mr. Peacock hissed.

Jerald growled, showing grimy teeth. He limped right over to Louis and forced the eye back in. The socket began to twist until the eye was facing the right direction.

"Fine." Jerald moaned. "I didn't even want Louis's stupid eye."

Mr. Peacock placed one, bones cracking with each twist.

"That's it. You aren't getting any of the birthday brain. Go to your room."

"Laaame. I hate you dad."

"You keep this up and I'll take away your intestines for a week."

Jerald stuck out his dried-up tongue. Mr. Peacock placed his hand into Jerald's chest and pulled out his guts. Such is life in Zombie City.

Mr. Danya
Joined: May 26th, 2007, 12:17 am

September 16th, 2014, 12:46 pm #17

It's been awhile. I have a few stories to drop.

502 words

This is a story about a goon named Phobia, who promised to have a Choose Your Own Adventure story done by 3:00 AM Monday morning. He was quite confident, so much so that he finished everything the night before! Having inflated his hubris, Phobia spent Sunday afternoon out on the town, only arriving back home after 11 PM. He sat down at his computer and cracked his

"Perhaps I'll post my entry early," he said, using a smug, witty said-bookism that would make Oxxidation squint his eyes in disapproval.

He went to his idling computer and came to a shocking discovery - it restarted while he was gone! Windows must have ran an update and shut everything down.

"Huh." He scratched his goatee. "That's inconvenient. Not a big deal. Lazarus must have saved it."

Unfortunately for him, the chrome extension Lazarus: Form Recovery was and still is a finicky bitch and it did not save anything.

"That's okay." He twitched. "I saved a copy on the computer."

He checked the C: drive. It was nowhere to be seen.

"Well fuck me sideways!" Phobia said. "What the fuck, are you serious? It was there yesterday!"

Fearing the :toxx:, Phobia frantically started to rewrite everything with only three hours on the clock! But then, to his delight, he realized something!

"Wait. Okay. Okay." Phobia said, outloud, in an empty room at 12 AM. He sipped his leftover Starbucks cappuccino from earlier in the day. "I saved a copy on my external hard drive so I should be good. Solid. Crystal."

He checked his $200 dollar external hard drive that he totally talked his friend into giving him bought from his university. He expected the copy to be there! It was not. In fact, on closer inspection, several days worth of data magically disappeared!

"God." Phobia twitched. "Damn it."

After a quick binge of cute kitty pictures to calm himself down, Phobia came back to the matter at hand.

That was when he remembered! Of course! He was working on the story a couple of days ago and sent an earlier draft to his personal email! Feeling rejuvenated, he quickly opened Gmail and searched.

He grinned. There it was! An email with a Microsoft Word document named "BOW WOW BATTLE ROYALE"! Thumbing his leather jacket (in the middle of August mind), with the hopes of salvaging his sinking ship, he opened the document -

- to find everything was replaced with wing-ding-type-corruped-bullshit-gobbily-goop that he couldn't make heads or tails over and could not recover.

Phobia then proceeded to curl up into a ball like a pathetic dog and cry stale tears into his stale Starbucks Cappuchino.

"I am dead. I have died." He blew his nose into his fedora, as most goons tend to do. "I lost my story and all I have left is some stupid photoshop I spent two hours making. Boo hoo woe is me."

And somewhere, far far away in Uganda, a child was crying out for it's mother.

Mr. Danya
Joined: May 26th, 2007, 12:17 am

September 16th, 2014, 12:52 pm #18

This is probably my favorite story so far, writing wise. Editing was an utter bitch. Might go back and do something with it in the future, not sure.
wrote:Your prompt this week is simple, if not easy. You are to write the first episode of a series. The pilot for this years hit TV show, the first volume of an epic trilogy, whatever. This means that your story must accomplish, at minimum, two things:

1) It must be a complete, stand-alone story. It starts, it ends, stuff happens in between. It stands on its own two legs, and it doesn’t fall apart if there’s never any more.

2) While not failing Requirement 1, it must leave an avenue open for more stories featuring your characters within your setting and it must make us actively want to read those stories. Maybe there’s a hint of a larger story arc, maybe your story sets up a premise that supports future episodes, you get the idea.

Everyone who enters will receive a flash rule.
My flashrule is "Let them cry for laughter's end."
Biggest Monster
912 words

Oni showed up at her contact's bar past one in the morning. The safe room was in the basement. The haze of neon and cigarette smoke up top did not belie the low-hanging lamps below, nor the shady hint to her middleman's grin. He slid the gym bag over to her, along with a manilla envelope.

She opened the envelope first. There was a cellphone and a picture, along with a note. The picture was of a father giving his daughter a piggyback ride. Both of them were laughing. Real candid moment.

"Cute little girl there." Her contact, Yoshi, said with a innocent litte smile.. He tapped the father's face. "That's him by the way. Hey, kid, listen. No offense? You need to be more careful with your clients."

Oni said nothing. She placed the picture down and started reading the note. The note detailed the man's intention to commit suicide. It also gave her the time, place and description of the target.

"Again, I mean no disrespect. Your guy today was an absolute wreck. All nerves, was practically crying up a storm when he made the drop off. Real liability."

Oni again said nothing. Her lips bunched as she reached for the phone. Phone was a brick, though the battery was fully charged. She flipped it open.

"He say what this is all about?" Oni asked.

"Yep." Yoshi lit a cigarette. "Said it was on the other side of the paper.”


She reached for the gymbag, noticing it was heavier than she expected. Oni unzipped the bag and the money spilled out. She took one of the bills and held it up.

"Five-hundred thousand." Yoshi took a drag from his cancer stick. "I checked already. It's all there, though I'd love it if you threw in a bonus, y'know?"

Oni pressed her fingers to her temples. She asked fifty, he gave her five hundred. Part of her tried to rationalize that he wasn't going to need the money after she finished the job. The note made that very clear. She could not help feeling the least bit guilty as she slipped Yoshi his stack of bills and left.


Oni checked the phone. There were pictures. There was a video. All recorded on the phone.

She wish she had just cut that goddamn line.


Oni's original plan was to hit the target in his hotel room at 8 PM. However, she did not anticipate him to head straight to the hotel bar and start hitting on every girl there. Oni watched him in that dark corner, eyes glancing at the ring around his finger. Two hours she spent, watching a man well into his fifties drinking his ass off in the hopes of getting his dick wet. Oni's frown morphed into an ugly sneer just thinking about it. She was not getting paid enough for this.

But she was certain it was him. No doubt.

He eventually got to his feet, hobbling over to the bathrooms. Oni checked her watch. She adjusted the cap on her head and stood.

Oni blocked the door with a nearby mop. Her target was at a urinal. If this was going to happen, it had to happen now. She walked up behind him and pushed him on the shoulder.

"Whuh?" The man staggered, squinting. "Ain't… Ain't this the men's-"

The man shuddered to a halt when the knife tore through his chest. Oni withdrew, letting him tumble to the tile floor. Oni was on top of him in an instant. She brought the knife down, digging into the man's stomach while her mouth clasped over his mouth. It wasn't just her arm but her entire body, moving, driving with the blade, striking more and more as droplets of red flew in all directions. Eventually the man stopped struggling but she did not stop, stopping was never an option, in fact the silence only served to make her stab even harder and dig even deeper. Oni desecrated his corpse like a pickaxe to an ice block, again and again, only stopping when her arm grew too numb to continue.

Oni stood. She made a mess. The urinal alone was like some macabre work of art. She clenched her teeth. Her gloves were covered. Her pantlegs were bloodless. There was piss on her cuff though. Serves her right for not letting him finish. She zipped up her jacket. Then she pulled out the picture of a father and daughter and threw it at the man’s corpse.

"Sick fuck."


Oni lost it. She admitted it. She was mad. But she had done just as the father instructed her to. The target ended his daughter. Oni remembered the picture, the expression of giggles rising from her belly almost palpable. Her father could never revel in her childish laughter.

Assassins revel in anonymity but Oni honestly wanted to speak to her client. She wanted to talk, or at least talk him down from killing himself. Had it been any other night, without the phone and the photo, she wouldn't even bat an eyelash at the idea of contacting a client after the hit. Now? She wasn’t sure. She was mixed on a lot of things.

Until that phone call, Oni only killed for money. But now that she witnessed true evil, she could not help feeling… no, satisfied was not the word. Peaceful seemed more appropriate. And at least she didn't have to worry about money for awhile.

Yoshi told her to be more careful with her clients. There may be some truth to that.