can't believe what my boss just said...

can't believe what my boss just said...

Joined: January 23rd, 2009, 5:02 pm

October 21st, 2011, 7:10 pm #1

Hey Ladies, so it's no secret in my office that I've been having miscarriages. I work for a small company...
So I told my boss this week that I was pg and asked him what I had left for vacation and sick time b/c I'm making multiple trips to see the specialist in Chicago. He got back to me 2 days later (today) and told me how much time I had left, then proceeded to tell me that he's going to be likely restructuring the bereavement/miscarriage time off. For my past 2 losses, I asked if I could take bereavement and they said yes. I never took more then 3 days,....usually just 2. So today he tells me, he's probably going to do what other companies do which is give 1 bereavement day for losses with a D&C and 3 bereavement days for losses that are just a normal delivery! I told him, "all my losses are deliveries, I've just had to get D&C's to stop bleeding or get retained tissue out!?!?" And he said, 'doesn't matter.' Then I go, "Well it's obvious you're changing this rule just b/c of me." And he goes, "Not necessarily!"

WTF? I would know if anybody else m/c'd! For gosh sake! Is he fricken kidding me!?!? Most the other women in my office are too old to have babies any more anyways!!! So that was just ridiculous!

I'm really upset by all this, it's just a huge slap in the face, like he's saying, "In the event you m/c again...." Frick! Makes me feel like I work for a heartless a$$ hole!! All b/c they don't want to grant me 2 extra bereavement days!!! Good God!

I'm looking at this guy in a whoooole new light now. I had no idea this was what his true colors were!

Legally I don't think there's anything I can do b/c it's a small company, they don't have to follow FMLA. But this really feels like prejudice!



TTC: Since Nov. 2006
Diagnosis: Ovarian Dysfunction & PCOS
28 Years Old
cd3 FSH 16.8
cd10 FSH 13.6
7 Unmonitored Cycles of Clomid
3 Unmonitored Cycles of Letrozole
Positive CCCT
TAB for cysts
1st Cycle of 150iu of Menopur with Timed BDing - 5 mature follies - BFN
TAB for cysts
2nd Cycle of 150iu of Menopur with Timed Intercourse - 4 mature follies in play - BFN
3rd Cycle of 150 iu of Menopur with Timed Intercourse - 2 follies - BFN
1st Cycle of Gonal F - 1 follie & cyst on right - BFN
TAB for a cycle
2nd Cycle of Gonal F = BFP!!!!!
11dpo Beta=27.9
14dpo Beta=120
16dpo Beta=210
18dpo Beta=429
21dpo Beta=1064
5w6d - baby measuring 3mm, h/b 101
6w6d - baby measuring 6mm, h/b 126
7w6d - baby 18mm, h/b 171, measuring ahead at 8w2d! RE noticed enlarged yolk sac so keeping a close eye on that
8w6d - baby 2.52cm with h/b of 174
9w5d - baby 3.22cm with h/b of 180 measuring 10w1d
10w6d - baby 4.34cmcm with h/b of 174 measuring 11w1d
12w u/s showed baby at 11.2cm with h/b of 162 - unfortunately, that evening I suffered a horrible m/c of a chromosomally NORMAL girl.... RIP my angel girl...you were loved....

Gonal F with Timed Intercourse-2WW
First cycle of Gonal F with Timed Intercourse since m/c - BFN
2nd Cycle of Gonal F with Timed Intercourse - BFN
TAB for a month on bcp's
3rd Cycle of Gonal F - BFP
-11dpo beta=14.9
-14dpo beta=45.7
-16dpo beta=140
-18dpo beta=366
u/s at 6w1d showed heart-rate of 114!!!!
u/s at 7w1d showed heart-rate of 141!!!!
u/s at 8w showed heart-rate of 179
u/s at 9w showed 2 SCH's, h/r of 197
u/s at 10w showed h/r of 175
u/s at 11w showed h/r of 180
u/s at 12 w showed h/r of 188
12w2d...m/c'd baby at home, lost too much blood, had to have emergency D&C...severely anemic....baby was a chromosomally normal boy
-developed a blood clot in leg 1 1/2 wks post D&C...saw a hematologist and had testing done and everything came back normal, will still treat me with Lovenex on next pregnancy

-First cycle since m/c....Gonal F, triggered with 8 mature follies, T/I - BFP!
-13dpo beta 106, progesterone 21.4
-15dpo beta 260, progesterone 12.2
-16dpo beta 411, progesterone 16
-20dpo beta 845, progesterone 19 (went in for u/s to rule out ectopic, couldn't see anything yet, but lining was thick)
-22dpo beta 1158, progesterone 18
-24dpo beta 1655, progesterone 20
-5w?? u/s showed 2 sacs...one measuring 4w0d, the other measuring 5w1d....possibly vanishing twin???
-6w u/s showed TWINS! 2 h/r's....121, 119. both measuring 6w1d! SCH 1cm
-At 7w pg, tested positive for lupus anticoagulant, on lovenox to treat it, TSH was 2.55
-7w2d u/s showed 2 babies measuring 7w4d & 7w3d, h/r's 158 & 153! SCH 2cm
-8w1d u/s showed 2 babies measuring 8w3d & 8w2d, h/r's 185 & 179! SCH 3cm
-10w2d u/s showed we lost baby A measuring 9w1d and had no h/r...baby B measured 10w1d with a h/r of 180...praying for Baby B to hang on, SCH gone, started thyroid med
-11w1d u/s showed Baby B measuring right on track, h/r of 174
-12w1d had a red bleeding episode & u/s showed Baby B measuring 1 day ahead and a h/r of 168, bleeding likely caused by Baby A's passing
-13w1d had some red spotting & u/s showed Baby B measuring 2 days behind and h/r of 157
-14w...baby measured 14w3d...and I suffered a horrible, very sudden miscarriage...another angel baby...that makes 4.
Saw Dr Mary Stephenson at U of Chicago for recurrent pregnancy loss....dx with Lupus Anticoagluant and Incompetent Cervix, will be treated with lovenox
5-25-11 - Had a Transabdominal Cerclage placed by Dr Haney at U of Chicago

Gonal F with Timed Intercourse (self medicated/unmonitored) BFN
Gonal F with Timed Intercourse: 7 follies in play - BFP at 10dpo!!!
12dpo hcg level 80.5, progesterone 16.8
14dpo hcg level 295, progesterone 18
6w3d u/s showed 1 baby with a h/r of 120, measuring 6w4d
7w3d u/s showed baby with h/r of 160, measuring 7w3d
7w5d u/s showed a possibility of TWINS! Baby A (the original) measured 8w, h/r 167...Baby B, hiding in the upper uterus measured 6w6d, h/r 176...time will tell if Baby B will make it
8w4d u/s showed Baby A doing well measuring 8w4d and h/r of 185....Baby B measured 7w3d and no h/r detected My 5 angels better help me out through the rest of all this
TTC: Since Nov. 2006
Diagnosis: Ovarian Dysfunction & PCOS
26 Years Old
cd3 FSH 16.8
cd10 FSH 13.6
7 Unmonitored Cycles of Clomid
3 Unmonitored Cycles of Letrozole
Positive CCCT
TAB for cysts
1st Cycle of 150iu of Menopur with Timed BDing - 5 mature follies - BFN
TAB for cysts
2nd Cycle of 150iu of Menopur with Timed Intercourse - 4 mature follies in play - BFN
3rd Cycle of 150 iu of Menopur with Timed Intercourse - 2 follies - BFN
1st Cycle of Gonal F - 1 follie & cyst on right - BFN
TAB for a cycle
2nd Cycle of Gonal F = BFP!!!!!
11dpo Beta=27.9
14dpo Beta=120
16dpo Beta=210
18dpo Beta=429
21dpo Beta=1064
5w6d - baby measuring 3mm, h/b 101
6w6d - baby measuring 6mm, h/b 126
7w6d - baby 18mm, h/b 171, measuring ahead at 8w2d! RE noticed enlarged yolk sac so keeping a close eye on that
8w6d - baby 2.52cm with h/b of 174
9w5d - baby 3.22cm with h/b of 180 measuring 10w1d
10w6d - baby 4.34cmcm with h/b of 174 measuring 11w1d
12w u/s showed baby at 11.2cm with h/b of 162 - unfortunately, that evening I suffered a horrible m/c of a chromosomally NORMAL girl.... RIP my angel girl...you were loved....

First cycle of Gonal F with Timed Intercourse since m/c - BFN
2nd Cycle of Gonal F with Timed Intercourse - BFN
TAB for a month on bcp's
3rd Cycle of Gonal F - BFP
-11dpo beta=14.9
-14dpo beta=45.7
-16dpo beta=140
-18dpo beta=366
u/s at 6w1d showed heart-rate of 114!!!!
u/s at 7w1d showed heart-rate of 141!!!!
u/s at 8w showed heart-rate of 179
u/s at 9w showed 2 SCH's, h/r of 197
u/s at 10w showed h/r of 175
u/s at 11w showed h/r of 180
u/s at 12 w showed h/r of 188
12w2d...m/c'd baby at home, lost too much blood, had to have emergency D&C...severely anemic....baby was a chromosomally normal boy
-developed a blood clot in leg 1 1/2 wks post D&C...saw a hematologist and had testing done and everything came back normal, will still treat me with Lovenex on next pregnancy
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Joined: June 5th, 2011, 4:39 pm

October 21st, 2011, 7:35 pm #2

First of all. Amy I am so happy for this new pg of yours and I wish you all the success. I no longer post much on these boards as I have moved on to DE. Anyways, my advice. When people show you who they are....... listen. Get through this pg and then look for another job. So sorry that u have seen his true colors. Good luck! Futurebeauty
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bigboy
bigboy

October 21st, 2011, 7:49 pm #3

Hey Ladies, so it's no secret in my office that I've been having miscarriages. I work for a small company...
So I told my boss this week that I was pg and asked him what I had left for vacation and sick time b/c I'm making multiple trips to see the specialist in Chicago. He got back to me 2 days later (today) and told me how much time I had left, then proceeded to tell me that he's going to be likely restructuring the bereavement/miscarriage time off. For my past 2 losses, I asked if I could take bereavement and they said yes. I never took more then 3 days,....usually just 2. So today he tells me, he's probably going to do what other companies do which is give 1 bereavement day for losses with a D&C and 3 bereavement days for losses that are just a normal delivery! I told him, "all my losses are deliveries, I've just had to get D&C's to stop bleeding or get retained tissue out!?!?" And he said, 'doesn't matter.' Then I go, "Well it's obvious you're changing this rule just b/c of me." And he goes, "Not necessarily!"

WTF? I would know if anybody else m/c'd! For gosh sake! Is he fricken kidding me!?!? Most the other women in my office are too old to have babies any more anyways!!! So that was just ridiculous!

I'm really upset by all this, it's just a huge slap in the face, like he's saying, "In the event you m/c again...." Frick! Makes me feel like I work for a heartless a$$ hole!! All b/c they don't want to grant me 2 extra bereavement days!!! Good God!

I'm looking at this guy in a whoooole new light now. I had no idea this was what his true colors were!

Legally I don't think there's anything I can do b/c it's a small company, they don't have to follow FMLA. But this really feels like prejudice!



TTC: Since Nov. 2006
Diagnosis: Ovarian Dysfunction & PCOS
28 Years Old
cd3 FSH 16.8
cd10 FSH 13.6
7 Unmonitored Cycles of Clomid
3 Unmonitored Cycles of Letrozole
Positive CCCT
TAB for cysts
1st Cycle of 150iu of Menopur with Timed BDing - 5 mature follies - BFN
TAB for cysts
2nd Cycle of 150iu of Menopur with Timed Intercourse - 4 mature follies in play - BFN
3rd Cycle of 150 iu of Menopur with Timed Intercourse - 2 follies - BFN
1st Cycle of Gonal F - 1 follie & cyst on right - BFN
TAB for a cycle
2nd Cycle of Gonal F = BFP!!!!!
11dpo Beta=27.9
14dpo Beta=120
16dpo Beta=210
18dpo Beta=429
21dpo Beta=1064
5w6d - baby measuring 3mm, h/b 101
6w6d - baby measuring 6mm, h/b 126
7w6d - baby 18mm, h/b 171, measuring ahead at 8w2d! RE noticed enlarged yolk sac so keeping a close eye on that
8w6d - baby 2.52cm with h/b of 174
9w5d - baby 3.22cm with h/b of 180 measuring 10w1d
10w6d - baby 4.34cmcm with h/b of 174 measuring 11w1d
12w u/s showed baby at 11.2cm with h/b of 162 - unfortunately, that evening I suffered a horrible m/c of a chromosomally NORMAL girl.... RIP my angel girl...you were loved....

Gonal F with Timed Intercourse-2WW
First cycle of Gonal F with Timed Intercourse since m/c - BFN
2nd Cycle of Gonal F with Timed Intercourse - BFN
TAB for a month on bcp's
3rd Cycle of Gonal F - BFP
-11dpo beta=14.9
-14dpo beta=45.7
-16dpo beta=140
-18dpo beta=366
u/s at 6w1d showed heart-rate of 114!!!!
u/s at 7w1d showed heart-rate of 141!!!!
u/s at 8w showed heart-rate of 179
u/s at 9w showed 2 SCH's, h/r of 197
u/s at 10w showed h/r of 175
u/s at 11w showed h/r of 180
u/s at 12 w showed h/r of 188
12w2d...m/c'd baby at home, lost too much blood, had to have emergency D&C...severely anemic....baby was a chromosomally normal boy
-developed a blood clot in leg 1 1/2 wks post D&C...saw a hematologist and had testing done and everything came back normal, will still treat me with Lovenex on next pregnancy

-First cycle since m/c....Gonal F, triggered with 8 mature follies, T/I - BFP!
-13dpo beta 106, progesterone 21.4
-15dpo beta 260, progesterone 12.2
-16dpo beta 411, progesterone 16
-20dpo beta 845, progesterone 19 (went in for u/s to rule out ectopic, couldn't see anything yet, but lining was thick)
-22dpo beta 1158, progesterone 18
-24dpo beta 1655, progesterone 20
-5w?? u/s showed 2 sacs...one measuring 4w0d, the other measuring 5w1d....possibly vanishing twin???
-6w u/s showed TWINS! 2 h/r's....121, 119. both measuring 6w1d! SCH 1cm
-At 7w pg, tested positive for lupus anticoagulant, on lovenox to treat it, TSH was 2.55
-7w2d u/s showed 2 babies measuring 7w4d & 7w3d, h/r's 158 & 153! SCH 2cm
-8w1d u/s showed 2 babies measuring 8w3d & 8w2d, h/r's 185 & 179! SCH 3cm
-10w2d u/s showed we lost baby A measuring 9w1d and had no h/r...baby B measured 10w1d with a h/r of 180...praying for Baby B to hang on, SCH gone, started thyroid med
-11w1d u/s showed Baby B measuring right on track, h/r of 174
-12w1d had a red bleeding episode & u/s showed Baby B measuring 1 day ahead and a h/r of 168, bleeding likely caused by Baby A's passing
-13w1d had some red spotting & u/s showed Baby B measuring 2 days behind and h/r of 157
-14w...baby measured 14w3d...and I suffered a horrible, very sudden miscarriage...another angel baby...that makes 4.
Saw Dr Mary Stephenson at U of Chicago for recurrent pregnancy loss....dx with Lupus Anticoagluant and Incompetent Cervix, will be treated with lovenox
5-25-11 - Had a Transabdominal Cerclage placed by Dr Haney at U of Chicago

Gonal F with Timed Intercourse (self medicated/unmonitored) BFN
Gonal F with Timed Intercourse: 7 follies in play - BFP at 10dpo!!!
12dpo hcg level 80.5, progesterone 16.8
14dpo hcg level 295, progesterone 18
6w3d u/s showed 1 baby with a h/r of 120, measuring 6w4d
7w3d u/s showed baby with h/r of 160, measuring 7w3d
7w5d u/s showed a possibility of TWINS! Baby A (the original) measured 8w, h/r 167...Baby B, hiding in the upper uterus measured 6w6d, h/r 176...time will tell if Baby B will make it
8w4d u/s showed Baby A doing well measuring 8w4d and h/r of 185....Baby B measured 7w3d and no h/r detected My 5 angels better help me out through the rest of all this
are you going back to work after the baby is here? would be so great if you werent but told him that you were. then when the 6 weeks leave is up or whatever and he's all prepared for you to come back, you just call him and say "oops changed my mind..you know how that goes."
seriously i dont miss the days of dealing with a*shole bosses. sorry you had to deal with that.
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Newbie
Newbie

October 21st, 2011, 11:37 pm #4

Hey Ladies, so it's no secret in my office that I've been having miscarriages. I work for a small company...
So I told my boss this week that I was pg and asked him what I had left for vacation and sick time b/c I'm making multiple trips to see the specialist in Chicago. He got back to me 2 days later (today) and told me how much time I had left, then proceeded to tell me that he's going to be likely restructuring the bereavement/miscarriage time off. For my past 2 losses, I asked if I could take bereavement and they said yes. I never took more then 3 days,....usually just 2. So today he tells me, he's probably going to do what other companies do which is give 1 bereavement day for losses with a D&C and 3 bereavement days for losses that are just a normal delivery! I told him, "all my losses are deliveries, I've just had to get D&C's to stop bleeding or get retained tissue out!?!?" And he said, 'doesn't matter.' Then I go, "Well it's obvious you're changing this rule just b/c of me." And he goes, "Not necessarily!"

WTF? I would know if anybody else m/c'd! For gosh sake! Is he fricken kidding me!?!? Most the other women in my office are too old to have babies any more anyways!!! So that was just ridiculous!

I'm really upset by all this, it's just a huge slap in the face, like he's saying, "In the event you m/c again...." Frick! Makes me feel like I work for a heartless a$$ hole!! All b/c they don't want to grant me 2 extra bereavement days!!! Good God!

I'm looking at this guy in a whoooole new light now. I had no idea this was what his true colors were!

Legally I don't think there's anything I can do b/c it's a small company, they don't have to follow FMLA. But this really feels like prejudice!



TTC: Since Nov. 2006
Diagnosis: Ovarian Dysfunction & PCOS
28 Years Old
cd3 FSH 16.8
cd10 FSH 13.6
7 Unmonitored Cycles of Clomid
3 Unmonitored Cycles of Letrozole
Positive CCCT
TAB for cysts
1st Cycle of 150iu of Menopur with Timed BDing - 5 mature follies - BFN
TAB for cysts
2nd Cycle of 150iu of Menopur with Timed Intercourse - 4 mature follies in play - BFN
3rd Cycle of 150 iu of Menopur with Timed Intercourse - 2 follies - BFN
1st Cycle of Gonal F - 1 follie & cyst on right - BFN
TAB for a cycle
2nd Cycle of Gonal F = BFP!!!!!
11dpo Beta=27.9
14dpo Beta=120
16dpo Beta=210
18dpo Beta=429
21dpo Beta=1064
5w6d - baby measuring 3mm, h/b 101
6w6d - baby measuring 6mm, h/b 126
7w6d - baby 18mm, h/b 171, measuring ahead at 8w2d! RE noticed enlarged yolk sac so keeping a close eye on that
8w6d - baby 2.52cm with h/b of 174
9w5d - baby 3.22cm with h/b of 180 measuring 10w1d
10w6d - baby 4.34cmcm with h/b of 174 measuring 11w1d
12w u/s showed baby at 11.2cm with h/b of 162 - unfortunately, that evening I suffered a horrible m/c of a chromosomally NORMAL girl.... RIP my angel girl...you were loved....

Gonal F with Timed Intercourse-2WW
First cycle of Gonal F with Timed Intercourse since m/c - BFN
2nd Cycle of Gonal F with Timed Intercourse - BFN
TAB for a month on bcp's
3rd Cycle of Gonal F - BFP
-11dpo beta=14.9
-14dpo beta=45.7
-16dpo beta=140
-18dpo beta=366
u/s at 6w1d showed heart-rate of 114!!!!
u/s at 7w1d showed heart-rate of 141!!!!
u/s at 8w showed heart-rate of 179
u/s at 9w showed 2 SCH's, h/r of 197
u/s at 10w showed h/r of 175
u/s at 11w showed h/r of 180
u/s at 12 w showed h/r of 188
12w2d...m/c'd baby at home, lost too much blood, had to have emergency D&C...severely anemic....baby was a chromosomally normal boy
-developed a blood clot in leg 1 1/2 wks post D&C...saw a hematologist and had testing done and everything came back normal, will still treat me with Lovenex on next pregnancy

-First cycle since m/c....Gonal F, triggered with 8 mature follies, T/I - BFP!
-13dpo beta 106, progesterone 21.4
-15dpo beta 260, progesterone 12.2
-16dpo beta 411, progesterone 16
-20dpo beta 845, progesterone 19 (went in for u/s to rule out ectopic, couldn't see anything yet, but lining was thick)
-22dpo beta 1158, progesterone 18
-24dpo beta 1655, progesterone 20
-5w?? u/s showed 2 sacs...one measuring 4w0d, the other measuring 5w1d....possibly vanishing twin???
-6w u/s showed TWINS! 2 h/r's....121, 119. both measuring 6w1d! SCH 1cm
-At 7w pg, tested positive for lupus anticoagulant, on lovenox to treat it, TSH was 2.55
-7w2d u/s showed 2 babies measuring 7w4d & 7w3d, h/r's 158 & 153! SCH 2cm
-8w1d u/s showed 2 babies measuring 8w3d & 8w2d, h/r's 185 & 179! SCH 3cm
-10w2d u/s showed we lost baby A measuring 9w1d and had no h/r...baby B measured 10w1d with a h/r of 180...praying for Baby B to hang on, SCH gone, started thyroid med
-11w1d u/s showed Baby B measuring right on track, h/r of 174
-12w1d had a red bleeding episode & u/s showed Baby B measuring 1 day ahead and a h/r of 168, bleeding likely caused by Baby A's passing
-13w1d had some red spotting & u/s showed Baby B measuring 2 days behind and h/r of 157
-14w...baby measured 14w3d...and I suffered a horrible, very sudden miscarriage...another angel baby...that makes 4.
Saw Dr Mary Stephenson at U of Chicago for recurrent pregnancy loss....dx with Lupus Anticoagluant and Incompetent Cervix, will be treated with lovenox
5-25-11 - Had a Transabdominal Cerclage placed by Dr Haney at U of Chicago

Gonal F with Timed Intercourse (self medicated/unmonitored) BFN
Gonal F with Timed Intercourse: 7 follies in play - BFP at 10dpo!!!
12dpo hcg level 80.5, progesterone 16.8
14dpo hcg level 295, progesterone 18
6w3d u/s showed 1 baby with a h/r of 120, measuring 6w4d
7w3d u/s showed baby with h/r of 160, measuring 7w3d
7w5d u/s showed a possibility of TWINS! Baby A (the original) measured 8w, h/r 167...Baby B, hiding in the upper uterus measured 6w6d, h/r 176...time will tell if Baby B will make it
8w4d u/s showed Baby A doing well measuring 8w4d and h/r of 185....Baby B measured 7w3d and no h/r detected My 5 angels better help me out through the rest of all this
Wow, is all I can say. It is just disgusting. My only m/c was close to the end of the first tri similar to a few of yours. Either way, any m/c is hard enough. I don't know what they chalked up the few days off I took as but I just didn't care. I know the economy is so tough right now. I know it will be hard to deal with this insensitive bastard. Hopefully, you will be able to work around what you have left to continue to go to Chicago without any fear of losing your job. I know its easier said then done, but the only thing that matters is that baby growing in your belly.
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A freind
A freind

October 22nd, 2011, 2:45 am #5

Hey Ladies, so it's no secret in my office that I've been having miscarriages. I work for a small company...
So I told my boss this week that I was pg and asked him what I had left for vacation and sick time b/c I'm making multiple trips to see the specialist in Chicago. He got back to me 2 days later (today) and told me how much time I had left, then proceeded to tell me that he's going to be likely restructuring the bereavement/miscarriage time off. For my past 2 losses, I asked if I could take bereavement and they said yes. I never took more then 3 days,....usually just 2. So today he tells me, he's probably going to do what other companies do which is give 1 bereavement day for losses with a D&C and 3 bereavement days for losses that are just a normal delivery! I told him, "all my losses are deliveries, I've just had to get D&C's to stop bleeding or get retained tissue out!?!?" And he said, 'doesn't matter.' Then I go, "Well it's obvious you're changing this rule just b/c of me." And he goes, "Not necessarily!"

WTF? I would know if anybody else m/c'd! For gosh sake! Is he fricken kidding me!?!? Most the other women in my office are too old to have babies any more anyways!!! So that was just ridiculous!

I'm really upset by all this, it's just a huge slap in the face, like he's saying, "In the event you m/c again...." Frick! Makes me feel like I work for a heartless a$$ hole!! All b/c they don't want to grant me 2 extra bereavement days!!! Good God!

I'm looking at this guy in a whoooole new light now. I had no idea this was what his true colors were!

Legally I don't think there's anything I can do b/c it's a small company, they don't have to follow FMLA. But this really feels like prejudice!



TTC: Since Nov. 2006
Diagnosis: Ovarian Dysfunction & PCOS
28 Years Old
cd3 FSH 16.8
cd10 FSH 13.6
7 Unmonitored Cycles of Clomid
3 Unmonitored Cycles of Letrozole
Positive CCCT
TAB for cysts
1st Cycle of 150iu of Menopur with Timed BDing - 5 mature follies - BFN
TAB for cysts
2nd Cycle of 150iu of Menopur with Timed Intercourse - 4 mature follies in play - BFN
3rd Cycle of 150 iu of Menopur with Timed Intercourse - 2 follies - BFN
1st Cycle of Gonal F - 1 follie & cyst on right - BFN
TAB for a cycle
2nd Cycle of Gonal F = BFP!!!!!
11dpo Beta=27.9
14dpo Beta=120
16dpo Beta=210
18dpo Beta=429
21dpo Beta=1064
5w6d - baby measuring 3mm, h/b 101
6w6d - baby measuring 6mm, h/b 126
7w6d - baby 18mm, h/b 171, measuring ahead at 8w2d! RE noticed enlarged yolk sac so keeping a close eye on that
8w6d - baby 2.52cm with h/b of 174
9w5d - baby 3.22cm with h/b of 180 measuring 10w1d
10w6d - baby 4.34cmcm with h/b of 174 measuring 11w1d
12w u/s showed baby at 11.2cm with h/b of 162 - unfortunately, that evening I suffered a horrible m/c of a chromosomally NORMAL girl.... RIP my angel girl...you were loved....

Gonal F with Timed Intercourse-2WW
First cycle of Gonal F with Timed Intercourse since m/c - BFN
2nd Cycle of Gonal F with Timed Intercourse - BFN
TAB for a month on bcp's
3rd Cycle of Gonal F - BFP
-11dpo beta=14.9
-14dpo beta=45.7
-16dpo beta=140
-18dpo beta=366
u/s at 6w1d showed heart-rate of 114!!!!
u/s at 7w1d showed heart-rate of 141!!!!
u/s at 8w showed heart-rate of 179
u/s at 9w showed 2 SCH's, h/r of 197
u/s at 10w showed h/r of 175
u/s at 11w showed h/r of 180
u/s at 12 w showed h/r of 188
12w2d...m/c'd baby at home, lost too much blood, had to have emergency D&C...severely anemic....baby was a chromosomally normal boy
-developed a blood clot in leg 1 1/2 wks post D&C...saw a hematologist and had testing done and everything came back normal, will still treat me with Lovenex on next pregnancy

-First cycle since m/c....Gonal F, triggered with 8 mature follies, T/I - BFP!
-13dpo beta 106, progesterone 21.4
-15dpo beta 260, progesterone 12.2
-16dpo beta 411, progesterone 16
-20dpo beta 845, progesterone 19 (went in for u/s to rule out ectopic, couldn't see anything yet, but lining was thick)
-22dpo beta 1158, progesterone 18
-24dpo beta 1655, progesterone 20
-5w?? u/s showed 2 sacs...one measuring 4w0d, the other measuring 5w1d....possibly vanishing twin???
-6w u/s showed TWINS! 2 h/r's....121, 119. both measuring 6w1d! SCH 1cm
-At 7w pg, tested positive for lupus anticoagulant, on lovenox to treat it, TSH was 2.55
-7w2d u/s showed 2 babies measuring 7w4d & 7w3d, h/r's 158 & 153! SCH 2cm
-8w1d u/s showed 2 babies measuring 8w3d & 8w2d, h/r's 185 & 179! SCH 3cm
-10w2d u/s showed we lost baby A measuring 9w1d and had no h/r...baby B measured 10w1d with a h/r of 180...praying for Baby B to hang on, SCH gone, started thyroid med
-11w1d u/s showed Baby B measuring right on track, h/r of 174
-12w1d had a red bleeding episode & u/s showed Baby B measuring 1 day ahead and a h/r of 168, bleeding likely caused by Baby A's passing
-13w1d had some red spotting & u/s showed Baby B measuring 2 days behind and h/r of 157
-14w...baby measured 14w3d...and I suffered a horrible, very sudden miscarriage...another angel baby...that makes 4.
Saw Dr Mary Stephenson at U of Chicago for recurrent pregnancy loss....dx with Lupus Anticoagluant and Incompetent Cervix, will be treated with lovenox
5-25-11 - Had a Transabdominal Cerclage placed by Dr Haney at U of Chicago

Gonal F with Timed Intercourse (self medicated/unmonitored) BFN
Gonal F with Timed Intercourse: 7 follies in play - BFP at 10dpo!!!
12dpo hcg level 80.5, progesterone 16.8
14dpo hcg level 295, progesterone 18
6w3d u/s showed 1 baby with a h/r of 120, measuring 6w4d
7w3d u/s showed baby with h/r of 160, measuring 7w3d
7w5d u/s showed a possibility of TWINS! Baby A (the original) measured 8w, h/r 167...Baby B, hiding in the upper uterus measured 6w6d, h/r 176...time will tell if Baby B will make it
8w4d u/s showed Baby A doing well measuring 8w4d and h/r of 185....Baby B measured 7w3d and no h/r detected My 5 angels better help me out through the rest of all this
He had no right to say that to you. At all. Jerk.

Also: check on your states Family and Medical Leave Act (FMLA). Check into that.

And: from what he said: In your previous pgs, as you said, you did deliver. He would not need to know the steps taken after to insure your health, that is your right to privacy as well. He is wrong that becasue you later had a procedure that that makes it the same. (The reason for the difference is to try to discriminate against people who ended their pg by choice, which totally does not apply to you. This should be set by how far in the PG it was, not what Dr. chose to do!) Also, a D&C is often done if the miscarriage is after 10 weeks... so this rule of his or anyone's is cruel.

I would also document this conversation and date it and have a notary, usually at the bank, seal the date. If he changes your medical because of your being PG, which this conversation seems to lead to, if you wanted to it seems like you could talk to an lawyer about this.

And, as was already mentioned, I'd look for a new job when you feel able. This guy is bad energy.

I'd really like to kick him in the shins for you.
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Alli
Alli

October 22nd, 2011, 12:38 pm #6

Hey Ladies, so it's no secret in my office that I've been having miscarriages. I work for a small company...
So I told my boss this week that I was pg and asked him what I had left for vacation and sick time b/c I'm making multiple trips to see the specialist in Chicago. He got back to me 2 days later (today) and told me how much time I had left, then proceeded to tell me that he's going to be likely restructuring the bereavement/miscarriage time off. For my past 2 losses, I asked if I could take bereavement and they said yes. I never took more then 3 days,....usually just 2. So today he tells me, he's probably going to do what other companies do which is give 1 bereavement day for losses with a D&C and 3 bereavement days for losses that are just a normal delivery! I told him, "all my losses are deliveries, I've just had to get D&C's to stop bleeding or get retained tissue out!?!?" And he said, 'doesn't matter.' Then I go, "Well it's obvious you're changing this rule just b/c of me." And he goes, "Not necessarily!"

WTF? I would know if anybody else m/c'd! For gosh sake! Is he fricken kidding me!?!? Most the other women in my office are too old to have babies any more anyways!!! So that was just ridiculous!

I'm really upset by all this, it's just a huge slap in the face, like he's saying, "In the event you m/c again...." Frick! Makes me feel like I work for a heartless a$$ hole!! All b/c they don't want to grant me 2 extra bereavement days!!! Good God!

I'm looking at this guy in a whoooole new light now. I had no idea this was what his true colors were!

Legally I don't think there's anything I can do b/c it's a small company, they don't have to follow FMLA. But this really feels like prejudice!



TTC: Since Nov. 2006
Diagnosis: Ovarian Dysfunction & PCOS
28 Years Old
cd3 FSH 16.8
cd10 FSH 13.6
7 Unmonitored Cycles of Clomid
3 Unmonitored Cycles of Letrozole
Positive CCCT
TAB for cysts
1st Cycle of 150iu of Menopur with Timed BDing - 5 mature follies - BFN
TAB for cysts
2nd Cycle of 150iu of Menopur with Timed Intercourse - 4 mature follies in play - BFN
3rd Cycle of 150 iu of Menopur with Timed Intercourse - 2 follies - BFN
1st Cycle of Gonal F - 1 follie & cyst on right - BFN
TAB for a cycle
2nd Cycle of Gonal F = BFP!!!!!
11dpo Beta=27.9
14dpo Beta=120
16dpo Beta=210
18dpo Beta=429
21dpo Beta=1064
5w6d - baby measuring 3mm, h/b 101
6w6d - baby measuring 6mm, h/b 126
7w6d - baby 18mm, h/b 171, measuring ahead at 8w2d! RE noticed enlarged yolk sac so keeping a close eye on that
8w6d - baby 2.52cm with h/b of 174
9w5d - baby 3.22cm with h/b of 180 measuring 10w1d
10w6d - baby 4.34cmcm with h/b of 174 measuring 11w1d
12w u/s showed baby at 11.2cm with h/b of 162 - unfortunately, that evening I suffered a horrible m/c of a chromosomally NORMAL girl.... RIP my angel girl...you were loved....

Gonal F with Timed Intercourse-2WW
First cycle of Gonal F with Timed Intercourse since m/c - BFN
2nd Cycle of Gonal F with Timed Intercourse - BFN
TAB for a month on bcp's
3rd Cycle of Gonal F - BFP
-11dpo beta=14.9
-14dpo beta=45.7
-16dpo beta=140
-18dpo beta=366
u/s at 6w1d showed heart-rate of 114!!!!
u/s at 7w1d showed heart-rate of 141!!!!
u/s at 8w showed heart-rate of 179
u/s at 9w showed 2 SCH's, h/r of 197
u/s at 10w showed h/r of 175
u/s at 11w showed h/r of 180
u/s at 12 w showed h/r of 188
12w2d...m/c'd baby at home, lost too much blood, had to have emergency D&C...severely anemic....baby was a chromosomally normal boy
-developed a blood clot in leg 1 1/2 wks post D&C...saw a hematologist and had testing done and everything came back normal, will still treat me with Lovenex on next pregnancy

-First cycle since m/c....Gonal F, triggered with 8 mature follies, T/I - BFP!
-13dpo beta 106, progesterone 21.4
-15dpo beta 260, progesterone 12.2
-16dpo beta 411, progesterone 16
-20dpo beta 845, progesterone 19 (went in for u/s to rule out ectopic, couldn't see anything yet, but lining was thick)
-22dpo beta 1158, progesterone 18
-24dpo beta 1655, progesterone 20
-5w?? u/s showed 2 sacs...one measuring 4w0d, the other measuring 5w1d....possibly vanishing twin???
-6w u/s showed TWINS! 2 h/r's....121, 119. both measuring 6w1d! SCH 1cm
-At 7w pg, tested positive for lupus anticoagulant, on lovenox to treat it, TSH was 2.55
-7w2d u/s showed 2 babies measuring 7w4d & 7w3d, h/r's 158 & 153! SCH 2cm
-8w1d u/s showed 2 babies measuring 8w3d & 8w2d, h/r's 185 & 179! SCH 3cm
-10w2d u/s showed we lost baby A measuring 9w1d and had no h/r...baby B measured 10w1d with a h/r of 180...praying for Baby B to hang on, SCH gone, started thyroid med
-11w1d u/s showed Baby B measuring right on track, h/r of 174
-12w1d had a red bleeding episode & u/s showed Baby B measuring 1 day ahead and a h/r of 168, bleeding likely caused by Baby A's passing
-13w1d had some red spotting & u/s showed Baby B measuring 2 days behind and h/r of 157
-14w...baby measured 14w3d...and I suffered a horrible, very sudden miscarriage...another angel baby...that makes 4.
Saw Dr Mary Stephenson at U of Chicago for recurrent pregnancy loss....dx with Lupus Anticoagluant and Incompetent Cervix, will be treated with lovenox
5-25-11 - Had a Transabdominal Cerclage placed by Dr Haney at U of Chicago

Gonal F with Timed Intercourse (self medicated/unmonitored) BFN
Gonal F with Timed Intercourse: 7 follies in play - BFP at 10dpo!!!
12dpo hcg level 80.5, progesterone 16.8
14dpo hcg level 295, progesterone 18
6w3d u/s showed 1 baby with a h/r of 120, measuring 6w4d
7w3d u/s showed baby with h/r of 160, measuring 7w3d
7w5d u/s showed a possibility of TWINS! Baby A (the original) measured 8w, h/r 167...Baby B, hiding in the upper uterus measured 6w6d, h/r 176...time will tell if Baby B will make it
8w4d u/s showed Baby A doing well measuring 8w4d and h/r of 185....Baby B measured 7w3d and no h/r detected My 5 angels better help me out through the rest of all this
Setting bereavement leave depending on medical condition??! Sounds intrusive and discriminatory. Unfortunately you are right about FMLA. Newbie is also right about the economy and you don't need financial pressure on top. Take some deep breaths, but do document if he continues to make statements like that. I'm guessing you don't really have a good HR dept per se.
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Joined: January 23rd, 2009, 5:02 pm

October 22nd, 2011, 1:05 pm #7

Of course, small company, no HR rep, and my boss isn't much of a boss anyways. So it's just an annoying situation. Legally, I'm not sure there is much I can do b/c bereavement is a part of a benefits program which employers are not required to grant. FMLA is the law, however, as I said before, I know for a fact our company is not large enough to have to follow FMLA. You have to have a minimum of 50 employees. We're not even half way there.

I really like what I do, and I can kind of come and go as I please. So I always thought this would be the ideal situation for me to have a family with. But man, this was just so tough to hear come out of his mouth.

I'm probably just going to ignore him and try to forget about it all and pray like crazy I don't have to worry about taking bereavement for a m/c ever again!



TTC: Since Nov. 2006
Diagnosis: Ovarian Dysfunction & PCOS
28 Years Old
cd3 FSH 16.8
cd10 FSH 13.6
7 Unmonitored Cycles of Clomid
3 Unmonitored Cycles of Letrozole
Positive CCCT
TAB for cysts
1st Cycle of 150iu of Menopur with Timed BDing - 5 mature follies - BFN
TAB for cysts
2nd Cycle of 150iu of Menopur with Timed Intercourse - 4 mature follies in play - BFN
3rd Cycle of 150 iu of Menopur with Timed Intercourse - 2 follies - BFN
1st Cycle of Gonal F - 1 follie & cyst on right - BFN
TAB for a cycle
2nd Cycle of Gonal F = BFP!!!!!
11dpo Beta=27.9
14dpo Beta=120
16dpo Beta=210
18dpo Beta=429
21dpo Beta=1064
5w6d - baby measuring 3mm, h/b 101
6w6d - baby measuring 6mm, h/b 126
7w6d - baby 18mm, h/b 171, measuring ahead at 8w2d! RE noticed enlarged yolk sac so keeping a close eye on that
8w6d - baby 2.52cm with h/b of 174
9w5d - baby 3.22cm with h/b of 180 measuring 10w1d
10w6d - baby 4.34cmcm with h/b of 174 measuring 11w1d
12w u/s showed baby at 11.2cm with h/b of 162 - unfortunately, that evening I suffered a horrible m/c of a chromosomally NORMAL girl.... RIP my angel girl...you were loved....

Gonal F with Timed Intercourse-2WW
First cycle of Gonal F with Timed Intercourse since m/c - BFN
2nd Cycle of Gonal F with Timed Intercourse - BFN
TAB for a month on bcp's
3rd Cycle of Gonal F - BFP
-11dpo beta=14.9
-14dpo beta=45.7
-16dpo beta=140
-18dpo beta=366
u/s at 6w1d showed heart-rate of 114!!!!
u/s at 7w1d showed heart-rate of 141!!!!
u/s at 8w showed heart-rate of 179
u/s at 9w showed 2 SCH's, h/r of 197
u/s at 10w showed h/r of 175
u/s at 11w showed h/r of 180
u/s at 12 w showed h/r of 188
12w2d...m/c'd baby at home, lost too much blood, had to have emergency D&C...severely anemic....baby was a chromosomally normal boy
-developed a blood clot in leg 1 1/2 wks post D&C...saw a hematologist and had testing done and everything came back normal, will still treat me with Lovenex on next pregnancy

-First cycle since m/c....Gonal F, triggered with 8 mature follies, T/I - BFP!
-13dpo beta 106, progesterone 21.4
-15dpo beta 260, progesterone 12.2
-16dpo beta 411, progesterone 16
-20dpo beta 845, progesterone 19 (went in for u/s to rule out ectopic, couldn't see anything yet, but lining was thick)
-22dpo beta 1158, progesterone 18
-24dpo beta 1655, progesterone 20
-5w?? u/s showed 2 sacs...one measuring 4w0d, the other measuring 5w1d....possibly vanishing twin???
-6w u/s showed TWINS! 2 h/r's....121, 119. both measuring 6w1d! SCH 1cm
-At 7w pg, tested positive for lupus anticoagulant, on lovenox to treat it, TSH was 2.55
-7w2d u/s showed 2 babies measuring 7w4d & 7w3d, h/r's 158 & 153! SCH 2cm
-8w1d u/s showed 2 babies measuring 8w3d & 8w2d, h/r's 185 & 179! SCH 3cm
-10w2d u/s showed we lost baby A measuring 9w1d and had no h/r...baby B measured 10w1d with a h/r of 180...praying for Baby B to hang on, SCH gone, started thyroid med
-11w1d u/s showed Baby B measuring right on track, h/r of 174
-12w1d had a red bleeding episode & u/s showed Baby B measuring 1 day ahead and a h/r of 168, bleeding likely caused by Baby A's passing
-13w1d had some red spotting & u/s showed Baby B measuring 2 days behind and h/r of 157
-14w...baby measured 14w3d...and I suffered a horrible, very sudden miscarriage...another angel baby...that makes 4.
Saw Dr Mary Stephenson at U of Chicago for recurrent pregnancy loss....dx with Lupus Anticoagluant and Incompetent Cervix, will be treated with lovenox
5-25-11 - Had a Transabdominal Cerclage placed by Dr Haney at U of Chicago

Gonal F with Timed Intercourse (self medicated/unmonitored) BFN
Gonal F with Timed Intercourse: 7 follies in play - BFP at 10dpo!!!
12dpo hcg level 80.5, progesterone 16.8
14dpo hcg level 295, progesterone 18
6w3d u/s showed 1 baby with a h/r of 120, measuring 6w4d
7w3d u/s showed baby with h/r of 160, measuring 7w3d
7w5d u/s showed a possibility of TWINS! Baby A (the original) measured 8w, h/r 167...Baby B, hiding in the upper uterus measured 6w6d, h/r 176...time will tell if Baby B will make it
8w4d u/s showed Baby A doing well measuring 8w4d and h/r of 185....Baby B measured 7w3d and no h/r detected My 5 angels better help me out through the rest of all this
TTC: Since Nov. 2006
Diagnosis: Ovarian Dysfunction & PCOS
26 Years Old
cd3 FSH 16.8
cd10 FSH 13.6
7 Unmonitored Cycles of Clomid
3 Unmonitored Cycles of Letrozole
Positive CCCT
TAB for cysts
1st Cycle of 150iu of Menopur with Timed BDing - 5 mature follies - BFN
TAB for cysts
2nd Cycle of 150iu of Menopur with Timed Intercourse - 4 mature follies in play - BFN
3rd Cycle of 150 iu of Menopur with Timed Intercourse - 2 follies - BFN
1st Cycle of Gonal F - 1 follie & cyst on right - BFN
TAB for a cycle
2nd Cycle of Gonal F = BFP!!!!!
11dpo Beta=27.9
14dpo Beta=120
16dpo Beta=210
18dpo Beta=429
21dpo Beta=1064
5w6d - baby measuring 3mm, h/b 101
6w6d - baby measuring 6mm, h/b 126
7w6d - baby 18mm, h/b 171, measuring ahead at 8w2d! RE noticed enlarged yolk sac so keeping a close eye on that
8w6d - baby 2.52cm with h/b of 174
9w5d - baby 3.22cm with h/b of 180 measuring 10w1d
10w6d - baby 4.34cmcm with h/b of 174 measuring 11w1d
12w u/s showed baby at 11.2cm with h/b of 162 - unfortunately, that evening I suffered a horrible m/c of a chromosomally NORMAL girl.... RIP my angel girl...you were loved....

First cycle of Gonal F with Timed Intercourse since m/c - BFN
2nd Cycle of Gonal F with Timed Intercourse - BFN
TAB for a month on bcp's
3rd Cycle of Gonal F - BFP
-11dpo beta=14.9
-14dpo beta=45.7
-16dpo beta=140
-18dpo beta=366
u/s at 6w1d showed heart-rate of 114!!!!
u/s at 7w1d showed heart-rate of 141!!!!
u/s at 8w showed heart-rate of 179
u/s at 9w showed 2 SCH's, h/r of 197
u/s at 10w showed h/r of 175
u/s at 11w showed h/r of 180
u/s at 12 w showed h/r of 188
12w2d...m/c'd baby at home, lost too much blood, had to have emergency D&C...severely anemic....baby was a chromosomally normal boy
-developed a blood clot in leg 1 1/2 wks post D&C...saw a hematologist and had testing done and everything came back normal, will still treat me with Lovenex on next pregnancy
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bigboy
bigboy

October 22nd, 2011, 2:08 pm #8

ive worked for a few small companies and a couple of them didnt have an HR dept. i was lucky though that this wasnt a big deal and didnt affect me most of the time bc they were good little companies.
one of them was not and i did have some HR issues that i had to take up with somenoe who wasnt HR. it sucked. bc that boss i had was an as*hole.
i agree with PP, i guess, since there isnt a whole lot you can do about it besides documenting (always document) try and ignore it and focus on the things you like about your job.
does this guy have a family? you would think if he did he wouldnt be quite such a jerk about it but if he doesnt then yeah, men just dont understand that stuff (i mean even the ones with families sometimes still dont truly get it it).
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Joined: January 23rd, 2009, 5:02 pm

October 22nd, 2011, 9:06 pm #9

He has 3 fully grown children of his own and even a grandchild. However, they all live many states away. So it's not a close family. But still. Ugh!



TTC: Since Nov. 2006
Diagnosis: Ovarian Dysfunction & PCOS
28 Years Old
cd3 FSH 16.8
cd10 FSH 13.6
7 Unmonitored Cycles of Clomid
3 Unmonitored Cycles of Letrozole
Positive CCCT
TAB for cysts
1st Cycle of 150iu of Menopur with Timed BDing - 5 mature follies - BFN
TAB for cysts
2nd Cycle of 150iu of Menopur with Timed Intercourse - 4 mature follies in play - BFN
3rd Cycle of 150 iu of Menopur with Timed Intercourse - 2 follies - BFN
1st Cycle of Gonal F - 1 follie & cyst on right - BFN
TAB for a cycle
2nd Cycle of Gonal F = BFP!!!!!
11dpo Beta=27.9
14dpo Beta=120
16dpo Beta=210
18dpo Beta=429
21dpo Beta=1064
5w6d - baby measuring 3mm, h/b 101
6w6d - baby measuring 6mm, h/b 126
7w6d - baby 18mm, h/b 171, measuring ahead at 8w2d! RE noticed enlarged yolk sac so keeping a close eye on that
8w6d - baby 2.52cm with h/b of 174
9w5d - baby 3.22cm with h/b of 180 measuring 10w1d
10w6d - baby 4.34cmcm with h/b of 174 measuring 11w1d
12w u/s showed baby at 11.2cm with h/b of 162 - unfortunately, that evening I suffered a horrible m/c of a chromosomally NORMAL girl.... RIP my angel girl...you were loved....

Gonal F with Timed Intercourse-2WW
First cycle of Gonal F with Timed Intercourse since m/c - BFN
2nd Cycle of Gonal F with Timed Intercourse - BFN
TAB for a month on bcp's
3rd Cycle of Gonal F - BFP
-11dpo beta=14.9
-14dpo beta=45.7
-16dpo beta=140
-18dpo beta=366
u/s at 6w1d showed heart-rate of 114!!!!
u/s at 7w1d showed heart-rate of 141!!!!
u/s at 8w showed heart-rate of 179
u/s at 9w showed 2 SCH's, h/r of 197
u/s at 10w showed h/r of 175
u/s at 11w showed h/r of 180
u/s at 12 w showed h/r of 188
12w2d...m/c'd baby at home, lost too much blood, had to have emergency D&C...severely anemic....baby was a chromosomally normal boy
-developed a blood clot in leg 1 1/2 wks post D&C...saw a hematologist and had testing done and everything came back normal, will still treat me with Lovenex on next pregnancy

-First cycle since m/c....Gonal F, triggered with 8 mature follies, T/I - BFP!
-13dpo beta 106, progesterone 21.4
-15dpo beta 260, progesterone 12.2
-16dpo beta 411, progesterone 16
-20dpo beta 845, progesterone 19 (went in for u/s to rule out ectopic, couldn't see anything yet, but lining was thick)
-22dpo beta 1158, progesterone 18
-24dpo beta 1655, progesterone 20
-5w?? u/s showed 2 sacs...one measuring 4w0d, the other measuring 5w1d....possibly vanishing twin???
-6w u/s showed TWINS! 2 h/r's....121, 119. both measuring 6w1d! SCH 1cm
-At 7w pg, tested positive for lupus anticoagulant, on lovenox to treat it, TSH was 2.55
-7w2d u/s showed 2 babies measuring 7w4d & 7w3d, h/r's 158 & 153! SCH 2cm
-8w1d u/s showed 2 babies measuring 8w3d & 8w2d, h/r's 185 & 179! SCH 3cm
-10w2d u/s showed we lost baby A measuring 9w1d and had no h/r...baby B measured 10w1d with a h/r of 180...praying for Baby B to hang on, SCH gone, started thyroid med
-11w1d u/s showed Baby B measuring right on track, h/r of 174
-12w1d had a red bleeding episode & u/s showed Baby B measuring 1 day ahead and a h/r of 168, bleeding likely caused by Baby A's passing
-13w1d had some red spotting & u/s showed Baby B measuring 2 days behind and h/r of 157
-14w...baby measured 14w3d...and I suffered a horrible, very sudden miscarriage...another angel baby...that makes 4.
Saw Dr Mary Stephenson at U of Chicago for recurrent pregnancy loss....dx with Lupus Anticoagluant and Incompetent Cervix, will be treated with lovenox
5-25-11 - Had a Transabdominal Cerclage placed by Dr Haney at U of Chicago

Gonal F with Timed Intercourse (self medicated/unmonitored) BFN
Gonal F with Timed Intercourse: 7 follies in play - BFP at 10dpo!!!
12dpo hcg level 80.5, progesterone 16.8
14dpo hcg level 295, progesterone 18
6w3d u/s showed 1 baby with a h/r of 120, measuring 6w4d
7w3d u/s showed baby with h/r of 160, measuring 7w3d
7w5d u/s showed a possibility of TWINS! Baby A (the original) measured 8w, h/r 167...Baby B, hiding in the upper uterus measured 6w6d, h/r 176...time will tell if Baby B will make it
8w4d u/s showed Baby A doing well measuring 8w4d and h/r of 185....Baby B measured 7w3d and no h/r detected My 5 angels better help me out through the rest of all this
TTC: Since Nov. 2006
Diagnosis: Ovarian Dysfunction & PCOS
26 Years Old
cd3 FSH 16.8
cd10 FSH 13.6
7 Unmonitored Cycles of Clomid
3 Unmonitored Cycles of Letrozole
Positive CCCT
TAB for cysts
1st Cycle of 150iu of Menopur with Timed BDing - 5 mature follies - BFN
TAB for cysts
2nd Cycle of 150iu of Menopur with Timed Intercourse - 4 mature follies in play - BFN
3rd Cycle of 150 iu of Menopur with Timed Intercourse - 2 follies - BFN
1st Cycle of Gonal F - 1 follie & cyst on right - BFN
TAB for a cycle
2nd Cycle of Gonal F = BFP!!!!!
11dpo Beta=27.9
14dpo Beta=120
16dpo Beta=210
18dpo Beta=429
21dpo Beta=1064
5w6d - baby measuring 3mm, h/b 101
6w6d - baby measuring 6mm, h/b 126
7w6d - baby 18mm, h/b 171, measuring ahead at 8w2d! RE noticed enlarged yolk sac so keeping a close eye on that
8w6d - baby 2.52cm with h/b of 174
9w5d - baby 3.22cm with h/b of 180 measuring 10w1d
10w6d - baby 4.34cmcm with h/b of 174 measuring 11w1d
12w u/s showed baby at 11.2cm with h/b of 162 - unfortunately, that evening I suffered a horrible m/c of a chromosomally NORMAL girl.... RIP my angel girl...you were loved....

First cycle of Gonal F with Timed Intercourse since m/c - BFN
2nd Cycle of Gonal F with Timed Intercourse - BFN
TAB for a month on bcp's
3rd Cycle of Gonal F - BFP
-11dpo beta=14.9
-14dpo beta=45.7
-16dpo beta=140
-18dpo beta=366
u/s at 6w1d showed heart-rate of 114!!!!
u/s at 7w1d showed heart-rate of 141!!!!
u/s at 8w showed heart-rate of 179
u/s at 9w showed 2 SCH's, h/r of 197
u/s at 10w showed h/r of 175
u/s at 11w showed h/r of 180
u/s at 12 w showed h/r of 188
12w2d...m/c'd baby at home, lost too much blood, had to have emergency D&C...severely anemic....baby was a chromosomally normal boy
-developed a blood clot in leg 1 1/2 wks post D&C...saw a hematologist and had testing done and everything came back normal, will still treat me with Lovenex on next pregnancy
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Whitney
Whitney

October 23rd, 2011, 2:04 am #10

Hey Ladies, so it's no secret in my office that I've been having miscarriages. I work for a small company...
So I told my boss this week that I was pg and asked him what I had left for vacation and sick time b/c I'm making multiple trips to see the specialist in Chicago. He got back to me 2 days later (today) and told me how much time I had left, then proceeded to tell me that he's going to be likely restructuring the bereavement/miscarriage time off. For my past 2 losses, I asked if I could take bereavement and they said yes. I never took more then 3 days,....usually just 2. So today he tells me, he's probably going to do what other companies do which is give 1 bereavement day for losses with a D&C and 3 bereavement days for losses that are just a normal delivery! I told him, "all my losses are deliveries, I've just had to get D&C's to stop bleeding or get retained tissue out!?!?" And he said, 'doesn't matter.' Then I go, "Well it's obvious you're changing this rule just b/c of me." And he goes, "Not necessarily!"

WTF? I would know if anybody else m/c'd! For gosh sake! Is he fricken kidding me!?!? Most the other women in my office are too old to have babies any more anyways!!! So that was just ridiculous!

I'm really upset by all this, it's just a huge slap in the face, like he's saying, "In the event you m/c again...." Frick! Makes me feel like I work for a heartless a$$ hole!! All b/c they don't want to grant me 2 extra bereavement days!!! Good God!

I'm looking at this guy in a whoooole new light now. I had no idea this was what his true colors were!

Legally I don't think there's anything I can do b/c it's a small company, they don't have to follow FMLA. But this really feels like prejudice!



TTC: Since Nov. 2006
Diagnosis: Ovarian Dysfunction & PCOS
28 Years Old
cd3 FSH 16.8
cd10 FSH 13.6
7 Unmonitored Cycles of Clomid
3 Unmonitored Cycles of Letrozole
Positive CCCT
TAB for cysts
1st Cycle of 150iu of Menopur with Timed BDing - 5 mature follies - BFN
TAB for cysts
2nd Cycle of 150iu of Menopur with Timed Intercourse - 4 mature follies in play - BFN
3rd Cycle of 150 iu of Menopur with Timed Intercourse - 2 follies - BFN
1st Cycle of Gonal F - 1 follie & cyst on right - BFN
TAB for a cycle
2nd Cycle of Gonal F = BFP!!!!!
11dpo Beta=27.9
14dpo Beta=120
16dpo Beta=210
18dpo Beta=429
21dpo Beta=1064
5w6d - baby measuring 3mm, h/b 101
6w6d - baby measuring 6mm, h/b 126
7w6d - baby 18mm, h/b 171, measuring ahead at 8w2d! RE noticed enlarged yolk sac so keeping a close eye on that
8w6d - baby 2.52cm with h/b of 174
9w5d - baby 3.22cm with h/b of 180 measuring 10w1d
10w6d - baby 4.34cmcm with h/b of 174 measuring 11w1d
12w u/s showed baby at 11.2cm with h/b of 162 - unfortunately, that evening I suffered a horrible m/c of a chromosomally NORMAL girl.... RIP my angel girl...you were loved....

Gonal F with Timed Intercourse-2WW
First cycle of Gonal F with Timed Intercourse since m/c - BFN
2nd Cycle of Gonal F with Timed Intercourse - BFN
TAB for a month on bcp's
3rd Cycle of Gonal F - BFP
-11dpo beta=14.9
-14dpo beta=45.7
-16dpo beta=140
-18dpo beta=366
u/s at 6w1d showed heart-rate of 114!!!!
u/s at 7w1d showed heart-rate of 141!!!!
u/s at 8w showed heart-rate of 179
u/s at 9w showed 2 SCH's, h/r of 197
u/s at 10w showed h/r of 175
u/s at 11w showed h/r of 180
u/s at 12 w showed h/r of 188
12w2d...m/c'd baby at home, lost too much blood, had to have emergency D&C...severely anemic....baby was a chromosomally normal boy
-developed a blood clot in leg 1 1/2 wks post D&C...saw a hematologist and had testing done and everything came back normal, will still treat me with Lovenex on next pregnancy

-First cycle since m/c....Gonal F, triggered with 8 mature follies, T/I - BFP!
-13dpo beta 106, progesterone 21.4
-15dpo beta 260, progesterone 12.2
-16dpo beta 411, progesterone 16
-20dpo beta 845, progesterone 19 (went in for u/s to rule out ectopic, couldn't see anything yet, but lining was thick)
-22dpo beta 1158, progesterone 18
-24dpo beta 1655, progesterone 20
-5w?? u/s showed 2 sacs...one measuring 4w0d, the other measuring 5w1d....possibly vanishing twin???
-6w u/s showed TWINS! 2 h/r's....121, 119. both measuring 6w1d! SCH 1cm
-At 7w pg, tested positive for lupus anticoagulant, on lovenox to treat it, TSH was 2.55
-7w2d u/s showed 2 babies measuring 7w4d & 7w3d, h/r's 158 & 153! SCH 2cm
-8w1d u/s showed 2 babies measuring 8w3d & 8w2d, h/r's 185 & 179! SCH 3cm
-10w2d u/s showed we lost baby A measuring 9w1d and had no h/r...baby B measured 10w1d with a h/r of 180...praying for Baby B to hang on, SCH gone, started thyroid med
-11w1d u/s showed Baby B measuring right on track, h/r of 174
-12w1d had a red bleeding episode & u/s showed Baby B measuring 1 day ahead and a h/r of 168, bleeding likely caused by Baby A's passing
-13w1d had some red spotting & u/s showed Baby B measuring 2 days behind and h/r of 157
-14w...baby measured 14w3d...and I suffered a horrible, very sudden miscarriage...another angel baby...that makes 4.
Saw Dr Mary Stephenson at U of Chicago for recurrent pregnancy loss....dx with Lupus Anticoagluant and Incompetent Cervix, will be treated with lovenox
5-25-11 - Had a Transabdominal Cerclage placed by Dr Haney at U of Chicago

Gonal F with Timed Intercourse (self medicated/unmonitored) BFN
Gonal F with Timed Intercourse: 7 follies in play - BFP at 10dpo!!!
12dpo hcg level 80.5, progesterone 16.8
14dpo hcg level 295, progesterone 18
6w3d u/s showed 1 baby with a h/r of 120, measuring 6w4d
7w3d u/s showed baby with h/r of 160, measuring 7w3d
7w5d u/s showed a possibility of TWINS! Baby A (the original) measured 8w, h/r 167...Baby B, hiding in the upper uterus measured 6w6d, h/r 176...time will tell if Baby B will make it
8w4d u/s showed Baby A doing well measuring 8w4d and h/r of 185....Baby B measured 7w3d and no h/r detected My 5 angels better help me out through the rest of all this
This sounds like my ex boss. Maybe they are related. I have no words of wisdom, other then hang in there and what goes around comes around and he will get his in the end.
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