Rock bottom (RELIGION MENTS)

Rock bottom (RELIGION MENTS)

Lost in space
Lost in space

June 26th, 2012, 11:52 am #1

I think I have hit rock bottom. I thought this cycle was perfect - TI - check, EWCM - check, ovulation pain on the side w/ the best tube - check - 10 DPO - BFN.

We got pregnant 3 times in 7 months and lost them all - I have not been pregnant since October.
I have no faith that God hears me anymore - so maybe I should change my approach and pray for some life ending/terminal illness so I don't have to deal with this pain the rest of my life.

No coverage or $ for treatment - we are at the end of the game.

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Joined: April 18th, 2012, 1:59 pm

June 26th, 2012, 1:52 pm #2

I understand you are upset, believe me I get it. But regardless of your situation one thing you should always be grateful for is your health. Trust me the pain of infertility does not equate to that of death. Ive been dealing with this for years and on Dec 29th, 2010 I lost my dad to a massive heart attack......no warning, no good bye, he went to bed and never for up! Life will NEVER be the same for my family.....DEVASTATING!

Maybe talking with a therapist would help? Meds?

I wish you all the best!
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Joined: April 18th, 2012, 1:59 pm

June 26th, 2012, 1:53 pm #3

Above post not anonymous: from Kathleen
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Joined: August 6th, 2011, 6:43 am

June 26th, 2012, 4:00 pm #4

I think I have hit rock bottom. I thought this cycle was perfect - TI - check, EWCM - check, ovulation pain on the side w/ the best tube - check - 10 DPO - BFN.

We got pregnant 3 times in 7 months and lost them all - I have not been pregnant since October.
I have no faith that God hears me anymore - so maybe I should change my approach and pray for some life ending/terminal illness so I don't have to deal with this pain the rest of my life.

No coverage or $ for treatment - we are at the end of the game.
I'm so sorry to read your post. You mentioned you didn't have money for treatments. I'm just wondering if you have considered donor embryos or doing a donor egg cycle overseas? Both are much less expensive than regular fresh DE cycles in the US. If you are interested in either of these options you should try posting on the pink board pregnancy and parenting after DE. Please don't close the door until you have looked at all your options. ((Hugs))
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Jennifer
Jennifer

June 26th, 2012, 4:17 pm #5

I think I have hit rock bottom. I thought this cycle was perfect - TI - check, EWCM - check, ovulation pain on the side w/ the best tube - check - 10 DPO - BFN.

We got pregnant 3 times in 7 months and lost them all - I have not been pregnant since October.
I have no faith that God hears me anymore - so maybe I should change my approach and pray for some life ending/terminal illness so I don't have to deal with this pain the rest of my life.

No coverage or $ for treatment - we are at the end of the game.
It totally sucks this infertility thing and even worse it seems everywhere you look there's some pregant woman walkinig around, or a mother yelling at her kids and your thinking..."if i could only have one" I know. Im going through it too. You have to have faith that there is a plan for you and at the end of the day if you want there to be, there will be a child in your life. Life rarely happens as we plan, but in the end it happens the way its supposed to.
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Anonymous
Anonymous

June 26th, 2012, 6:27 pm #6

I think I have hit rock bottom. I thought this cycle was perfect - TI - check, EWCM - check, ovulation pain on the side w/ the best tube - check - 10 DPO - BFN.

We got pregnant 3 times in 7 months and lost them all - I have not been pregnant since October.
I have no faith that God hears me anymore - so maybe I should change my approach and pray for some life ending/terminal illness so I don't have to deal with this pain the rest of my life.

No coverage or $ for treatment - we are at the end of the game.
I'm so sorry, it really is the most shattering thing to deal with. I am going to hold out hope that there is something special for you around the corner.. hugs to you.
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BabyDance
BabyDance

June 27th, 2012, 3:43 pm #7

I think I have hit rock bottom. I thought this cycle was perfect - TI - check, EWCM - check, ovulation pain on the side w/ the best tube - check - 10 DPO - BFN.

We got pregnant 3 times in 7 months and lost them all - I have not been pregnant since October.
I have no faith that God hears me anymore - so maybe I should change my approach and pray for some life ending/terminal illness so I don't have to deal with this pain the rest of my life.

No coverage or $ for treatment - we are at the end of the game.
There are writings about the stages of healing through a crisis. They are denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance. You will have to go through these stages to get to the other side. It sounds like you are in anger or depression, but you will get to acceptance. And perhaps you will get a miracle on the way. I hope so. But, in the meantime, it may help to read about the stages of healing or perhaps to talk to someone professionally will help. So sorry you are feeling this way.
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anne
anne

June 27th, 2012, 9:54 pm #8

I think I have hit rock bottom. I thought this cycle was perfect - TI - check, EWCM - check, ovulation pain on the side w/ the best tube - check - 10 DPO - BFN.

We got pregnant 3 times in 7 months and lost them all - I have not been pregnant since October.
I have no faith that God hears me anymore - so maybe I should change my approach and pray for some life ending/terminal illness so I don't have to deal with this pain the rest of my life.

No coverage or $ for treatment - we are at the end of the game.
this is such a devastating journey and so gut wrenching.
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lost
lost

June 28th, 2012, 12:17 am #9

There are writings about the stages of healing through a crisis. They are denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance. You will have to go through these stages to get to the other side. It sounds like you are in anger or depression, but you will get to acceptance. And perhaps you will get a miracle on the way. I hope so. But, in the meantime, it may help to read about the stages of healing or perhaps to talk to someone professionally will help. So sorry you are feeling this way.
Not sure I will ever accept it. It will never be ok
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BabyDance
BabyDance

June 28th, 2012, 1:30 am #10

Some days, I'm there, some days, I'm not. It always hurts, but it is hurting less. You will get there. I know you don't want to hear that, but it takes time. So sorry.
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