Miscarriage at 20 weeks after 3 years of infertility

Miscarriage at 20 weeks after 3 years of infertility

Holly
Holly

May 23rd, 2012, 10:34 am #1

Hi Ladies:

I haven't posted in quite awhile (5 months to be exact) due to my pregnancy. Just found out today after our 20 week visit that the baby had died most likely due to a genetic defect (Trisomy 18, 21 or Turner's). They'll obviously do more testing after the D&E this week which will be welcome news (I think). I'm 39 (B-day in Oct) and have been diagnosed with small ovaries and high FSH (13.7) at the last Clomid challenge. TTC for roughly 3 years. Got pregnant this go around naturally just prior to scheduled IVF. I have a BBG that will be turning 6 in Sept.

I'm obviously very emotional right not but more so scared. Dr. assured us that our chances of having another fetus with genetic complications are equal to my odds before the pregnancy (about 1%). Getting this far down the road after waiting so long is quite devasting. I'm weighing the risks of going forward with more treatments or just calling it quits on account of my age. I'm very concerned that my issue may very well be egg health which obviously I can not improve.

Jumping into the forum now that I've experienced a loss makes me feel selfish but it's the best support group I've had the privilege of participating in. Just hoping someone has some words of wisdom!

Holly
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Kim
Kim

May 23rd, 2012, 1:14 pm #2

about the m/c at 20 weeks. Cannot imagine how you must feel. Hoping you find peace when they are able to do some genetic testing!

Don't get discouraged as you are truly very young yet in the TTC world. I conceived my child around your age, so it CAN happen. M/c seem to be very common at ALL ages. We m/c once prior to our child and once after, and the m/c never are easy!

Hoping you find some answers soon and glad you came back to post!
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ekb88
ekb88

May 23rd, 2012, 3:16 pm #3

Hi Ladies:

I haven't posted in quite awhile (5 months to be exact) due to my pregnancy. Just found out today after our 20 week visit that the baby had died most likely due to a genetic defect (Trisomy 18, 21 or Turner's). They'll obviously do more testing after the D&E this week which will be welcome news (I think). I'm 39 (B-day in Oct) and have been diagnosed with small ovaries and high FSH (13.7) at the last Clomid challenge. TTC for roughly 3 years. Got pregnant this go around naturally just prior to scheduled IVF. I have a BBG that will be turning 6 in Sept.

I'm obviously very emotional right not but more so scared. Dr. assured us that our chances of having another fetus with genetic complications are equal to my odds before the pregnancy (about 1%). Getting this far down the road after waiting so long is quite devasting. I'm weighing the risks of going forward with more treatments or just calling it quits on account of my age. I'm very concerned that my issue may very well be egg health which obviously I can not improve.

Jumping into the forum now that I've experienced a loss makes me feel selfish but it's the best support group I've had the privilege of participating in. Just hoping someone has some words of wisdom!

Holly
How heartbreaking. I'm so sorry that this has happened to you. Just wanted to share that I got pg at 40 after 2.5 years trying (3 iui's, 2 ivf's, natural pg waiting on ivf#3) and had ds. Then 14 months after that got pg again (at 42) and it turned out to be a blighted ovum, which usually indicates a chromosomal issue. And then got pg again about 7 months later (at 43) with what appears so far (at 26 weeks) to be a healthy girl.

Unfortunately chromosomal issues happen, but especially at 39 I wouldn't let it stop you from continuing to try. I know it's hard to think about as you are grieving, but it is a good sign that your body was able to carry a pregnancy this far, and I think it's a good sign for your future chances. I think it would be helpful for you to do as much as you can in terms of taking supplements that are thought to improve egg quality, like coQ-10 and such. If you look for my "what worked for me" post from about three months back, you'll see what I posted about what I took.

Hugs to you, and I'm very sorry for your loss.
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anne
anne

May 23rd, 2012, 3:38 pm #4

Hi Ladies:

I haven't posted in quite awhile (5 months to be exact) due to my pregnancy. Just found out today after our 20 week visit that the baby had died most likely due to a genetic defect (Trisomy 18, 21 or Turner's). They'll obviously do more testing after the D&E this week which will be welcome news (I think). I'm 39 (B-day in Oct) and have been diagnosed with small ovaries and high FSH (13.7) at the last Clomid challenge. TTC for roughly 3 years. Got pregnant this go around naturally just prior to scheduled IVF. I have a BBG that will be turning 6 in Sept.

I'm obviously very emotional right not but more so scared. Dr. assured us that our chances of having another fetus with genetic complications are equal to my odds before the pregnancy (about 1%). Getting this far down the road after waiting so long is quite devasting. I'm weighing the risks of going forward with more treatments or just calling it quits on account of my age. I'm very concerned that my issue may very well be egg health which obviously I can not improve.

Jumping into the forum now that I've experienced a loss makes me feel selfish but it's the best support group I've had the privilege of participating in. Just hoping someone has some words of wisdom!

Holly
i am so sorry this happened but i believe you are young yet and still have a chance. start taking 800 ubiquinol coq10; i think that did the trick for jamie when she was your age.
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PhoebeMass
PhoebeMass

May 23rd, 2012, 3:39 pm #5

Hi Ladies:

I haven't posted in quite awhile (5 months to be exact) due to my pregnancy. Just found out today after our 20 week visit that the baby had died most likely due to a genetic defect (Trisomy 18, 21 or Turner's). They'll obviously do more testing after the D&E this week which will be welcome news (I think). I'm 39 (B-day in Oct) and have been diagnosed with small ovaries and high FSH (13.7) at the last Clomid challenge. TTC for roughly 3 years. Got pregnant this go around naturally just prior to scheduled IVF. I have a BBG that will be turning 6 in Sept.

I'm obviously very emotional right not but more so scared. Dr. assured us that our chances of having another fetus with genetic complications are equal to my odds before the pregnancy (about 1%). Getting this far down the road after waiting so long is quite devasting. I'm weighing the risks of going forward with more treatments or just calling it quits on account of my age. I'm very concerned that my issue may very well be egg health which obviously I can not improve.

Jumping into the forum now that I've experienced a loss makes me feel selfish but it's the best support group I've had the privilege of participating in. Just hoping someone has some words of wisdom!

Holly
I cannot imagine your pain and how numb you must feel. I am so very sorry that you are having this sad journey.

My sister had two late term m/c's and they were devastating. She did find solace with a counselor. I think she and her DH had talked to each other as much as they could and then needed a 3rd party to help with the emotions. The sadness is still there. I wish I could make it go away for her. And for you.

Big hugs to you, Holly.
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DeeinNYC
DeeinNYC

May 23rd, 2012, 4:30 pm #6

Hi Ladies:

I haven't posted in quite awhile (5 months to be exact) due to my pregnancy. Just found out today after our 20 week visit that the baby had died most likely due to a genetic defect (Trisomy 18, 21 or Turner's). They'll obviously do more testing after the D&E this week which will be welcome news (I think). I'm 39 (B-day in Oct) and have been diagnosed with small ovaries and high FSH (13.7) at the last Clomid challenge. TTC for roughly 3 years. Got pregnant this go around naturally just prior to scheduled IVF. I have a BBG that will be turning 6 in Sept.

I'm obviously very emotional right not but more so scared. Dr. assured us that our chances of having another fetus with genetic complications are equal to my odds before the pregnancy (about 1%). Getting this far down the road after waiting so long is quite devasting. I'm weighing the risks of going forward with more treatments or just calling it quits on account of my age. I'm very concerned that my issue may very well be egg health which obviously I can not improve.

Jumping into the forum now that I've experienced a loss makes me feel selfish but it's the best support group I've had the privilege of participating in. Just hoping someone has some words of wisdom!

Holly
M/c is never easy but I can't imagine going through it at 20 weeks. I am so very sorry. I would agree with previous posters..you are YOUNG Your FSH is not that bad right now. Don't get me wrong, you need to act quickly and soon, but you still have a good chance of having your OE baby if you get to the right doctor that understands how to treat high FSH and get the right protocol. I would get an AMH test done ASAP to determine your AMH level which will give you an indication of your ovarian reserve. All the best to you.
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jkl
jkl

May 23rd, 2012, 4:37 pm #7

Hi Ladies:

I haven't posted in quite awhile (5 months to be exact) due to my pregnancy. Just found out today after our 20 week visit that the baby had died most likely due to a genetic defect (Trisomy 18, 21 or Turner's). They'll obviously do more testing after the D&E this week which will be welcome news (I think). I'm 39 (B-day in Oct) and have been diagnosed with small ovaries and high FSH (13.7) at the last Clomid challenge. TTC for roughly 3 years. Got pregnant this go around naturally just prior to scheduled IVF. I have a BBG that will be turning 6 in Sept.

I'm obviously very emotional right not but more so scared. Dr. assured us that our chances of having another fetus with genetic complications are equal to my odds before the pregnancy (about 1%). Getting this far down the road after waiting so long is quite devasting. I'm weighing the risks of going forward with more treatments or just calling it quits on account of my age. I'm very concerned that my issue may very well be egg health which obviously I can not improve.

Jumping into the forum now that I've experienced a loss makes me feel selfish but it's the best support group I've had the privilege of participating in. Just hoping someone has some words of wisdom!

Holly
It's very devastating to find that out especially so late in the pregnancy. Did you have any earlier testing?

I have a very healthy dd that I conceived at 39 and had at 40. I have very similar stats to you, small ovaries and FSH usually between 10 and 14, highest 18. The chromosomal thing is a crapshoot, obviously the risks increase with age but still the odds are on your side. It is very stressful though, I am pregnant again at almost 42 and very nervous for the testing part. Take care, what does BBG stand for?

jkl
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Jamie
Jamie

May 23rd, 2012, 5:20 pm #8

Hi Ladies:

I haven't posted in quite awhile (5 months to be exact) due to my pregnancy. Just found out today after our 20 week visit that the baby had died most likely due to a genetic defect (Trisomy 18, 21 or Turner's). They'll obviously do more testing after the D&E this week which will be welcome news (I think). I'm 39 (B-day in Oct) and have been diagnosed with small ovaries and high FSH (13.7) at the last Clomid challenge. TTC for roughly 3 years. Got pregnant this go around naturally just prior to scheduled IVF. I have a BBG that will be turning 6 in Sept.

I'm obviously very emotional right not but more so scared. Dr. assured us that our chances of having another fetus with genetic complications are equal to my odds before the pregnancy (about 1%). Getting this far down the road after waiting so long is quite devasting. I'm weighing the risks of going forward with more treatments or just calling it quits on account of my age. I'm very concerned that my issue may very well be egg health which obviously I can not improve.

Jumping into the forum now that I've experienced a loss makes me feel selfish but it's the best support group I've had the privilege of participating in. Just hoping someone has some words of wisdom!

Holly
This is simply devastating. I lost a pregnancy very early and it was very hard. I cannot imagine how this feels; it is so tragic.

I want to reassure you that yes, you can have a healthy baby! On my first IVF at almost 39 I got pregnant and miscarried, probably because of a chromosomal defect. I went on to get pregnant on my second IVF at 39 and have a healthy girl and almost 40. My FSH was 20.

I personally believe that you can improve egg quality. On my first IVF with the early miscarriage, I was told that my eggs were dark and grainy. None of them turned into a baby. On my second IVF I had dramatically better eggs. One was my daughter and I have another frozen embryo that we've tested and know is chromosomally normal (this is out of six fertilized eggs, so pretty good for my age!). The difference was that for the second IVF I had three months of large doses of CoQ10 and Ubiquinol under my belt. I also had seen a chiropractor and done herbs and acupuncture. Many of us on this board have had success after doing the CoQ10/Ubiquinol, and I think it's especially helpful in perking up eggs in the 30s.

Other people have used inositol and melatonin to improve quality. Some have used DHEA (tread carefully--this can go either way). I think the CoQ10/Ubiquinol is a no-brainer.

Don't despair--it CAN happen for you!

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smrc
smrc

May 23rd, 2012, 8:38 pm #9

Hi Ladies:

I haven't posted in quite awhile (5 months to be exact) due to my pregnancy. Just found out today after our 20 week visit that the baby had died most likely due to a genetic defect (Trisomy 18, 21 or Turner's). They'll obviously do more testing after the D&E this week which will be welcome news (I think). I'm 39 (B-day in Oct) and have been diagnosed with small ovaries and high FSH (13.7) at the last Clomid challenge. TTC for roughly 3 years. Got pregnant this go around naturally just prior to scheduled IVF. I have a BBG that will be turning 6 in Sept.

I'm obviously very emotional right not but more so scared. Dr. assured us that our chances of having another fetus with genetic complications are equal to my odds before the pregnancy (about 1%). Getting this far down the road after waiting so long is quite devasting. I'm weighing the risks of going forward with more treatments or just calling it quits on account of my age. I'm very concerned that my issue may very well be egg health which obviously I can not improve.

Jumping into the forum now that I've experienced a loss makes me feel selfish but it's the best support group I've had the privilege of participating in. Just hoping someone has some words of wisdom!

Holly
I can't imagine how heartbreaking it is to get that far along. I'm hopeful for you for further TTC attempts and take good care of yourself over the next few weeks.
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BroodyHen
BroodyHen

May 25th, 2012, 5:06 am #10

Hi Ladies:

I haven't posted in quite awhile (5 months to be exact) due to my pregnancy. Just found out today after our 20 week visit that the baby had died most likely due to a genetic defect (Trisomy 18, 21 or Turner's). They'll obviously do more testing after the D&E this week which will be welcome news (I think). I'm 39 (B-day in Oct) and have been diagnosed with small ovaries and high FSH (13.7) at the last Clomid challenge. TTC for roughly 3 years. Got pregnant this go around naturally just prior to scheduled IVF. I have a BBG that will be turning 6 in Sept.

I'm obviously very emotional right not but more so scared. Dr. assured us that our chances of having another fetus with genetic complications are equal to my odds before the pregnancy (about 1%). Getting this far down the road after waiting so long is quite devasting. I'm weighing the risks of going forward with more treatments or just calling it quits on account of my age. I'm very concerned that my issue may very well be egg health which obviously I can not improve.

Jumping into the forum now that I've experienced a loss makes me feel selfish but it's the best support group I've had the privilege of participating in. Just hoping someone has some words of wisdom!

Holly
that is just terrible. i'm so very sorry for your loss. it is hard to think about moving forward now, but you are young! and you've already had success. i think the odds are in your favor when you are ready to try again. maybe that can bring you a little bit of comfort. oh, it is just so hard! all the best to you as you heal...
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