depressed (child ment'd)

depressed (child ment'd)

Anonymous
Anonymous

March 4th, 2011, 12:26 pm #1

Does anyone here have kids and still feel depressed that they can't have another? I should feel fortunate and I do, but still feel depressed and sad. It is affecting my daily activities. I don't want to start any antidepressants since not good for TTC, but I need to really get over this. How can I even think about feeling depressed when I should feel grateful. Even writing this makes me feel like a bad person.
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Joined: February 24th, 2011, 10:09 pm

March 4th, 2011, 3:23 pm #2

I think a lot of people with secondary infertility have guilt...but IF is IF, it's about not being in control, not about "well you should be grateful because you could have one at least." We're not here for one-upmanship. Also, there is a support group specific to secondary IF (above). Hope you feel better soon.

I know there are a variety of opinions out there, but I'm treated by someone who thinks depression is worse for TTC than meds. Some of them are contraindicated, though, so if you decide to explore it, definitely seek pro advice.
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Anonymous
Anonymous

March 4th, 2011, 5:35 pm #3

Does anyone here have kids and still feel depressed that they can't have another? I should feel fortunate and I do, but still feel depressed and sad. It is affecting my daily activities. I don't want to start any antidepressants since not good for TTC, but I need to really get over this. How can I even think about feeling depressed when I should feel grateful. Even writing this makes me feel like a bad person.
I know exactly what you mean, you already have kids so you almost feel greedy for wanting another. For me it's almost worse having infertility the second time around because you want to have that sibling for the kid you already have. I still debate with myself...shouldn't I just be happy with what I have?? The bottom-line is, I think infertility is just hard no matter what and no, I don't think you are a bad person at all I think you are normal to have those feelings.
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Anonymous
Anonymous

March 4th, 2011, 7:44 pm #4

Does anyone here have kids and still feel depressed that they can't have another? I should feel fortunate and I do, but still feel depressed and sad. It is affecting my daily activities. I don't want to start any antidepressants since not good for TTC, but I need to really get over this. How can I even think about feeling depressed when I should feel grateful. Even writing this makes me feel like a bad person.
they might be much better with advice and encouragement as most of us here have not been lucky enough to have a child yet?

I am very sorry you are feeling sad. I hope we or they can help.
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Anonymous
Anonymous

March 4th, 2011, 9:06 pm #5

Does anyone here have kids and still feel depressed that they can't have another? I should feel fortunate and I do, but still feel depressed and sad. It is affecting my daily activities. I don't want to start any antidepressants since not good for TTC, but I need to really get over this. How can I even think about feeling depressed when I should feel grateful. Even writing this makes me feel like a bad person.
I had never heard that ADs are bad for TTC - can you explain? I was always told they were OK
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Anonymous
Anonymous

March 4th, 2011, 9:14 pm #6

some RIs (reproductive immunologists) prescribe ADs during TTC on purpose after measuring the level of serotonin in your blood. The theory is if you have low levels it makes the uterine lining less receptive ("teflon uterus" they call it), they want serotonin levels high. RI docs gave me lexapro and zoloft. Most of the medical world thinks that theory is ludicrous though.

I gave up on the RIs long ago but do take an AD. My lining was fine/ healthy pg on ADs.
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anon
anon

March 4th, 2011, 9:36 pm #7

Can you suggest a RI that gives antidepressants? I thought they AD were not to be used when TTC - that they harm the embryo.
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Anonymous
Anonymous

March 4th, 2011, 9:58 pm #8

Beer Center (Dr Stricker) recommends antidepressantshttp://repro-med.net/repro-med-site2/

Not recommending them though, I quit doing their most controversial treatments, better results without it.

Elsewhere I've not heard anything negative about using certain antidepressants while TTC and during pregnancy, they can really help mood during this stressful process.
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anon
anon

March 4th, 2011, 11:07 pm #9

Did I understand you correctly that you took an AD and had a healthy pregnancy? I may look into this as my lining is also very thin.
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Anonymous
Anonymous

March 4th, 2011, 11:24 pm #10

I took prozac (and a high dose) with the blessing of my OBGYN, RE, and shrink. All researched it and said it was fine. Had an ideal 40 week pg with 8+ lb healthy child. Taking prozac (or whatever approved AD) is very common in pg, the reason I stuck w/ prozac is because it is one of the oldest and most studied SSRIs for pregnancy. I wasn't taking it to help my lining though, it was to help depression/anxiety.
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