Ryan Parker: Welcome to the Retired in California

Ryan Parker: Welcome to the Retired in California

Joined: December 14th, 2001, 1:34 am

July 31st, 2011, 1:43 pm #1

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JrmSbx5n ... r_embedded

On the AA highway, orange paint in my hair,
Warm smell of the tailgates rising up through the air,
But up ahead in the distance, I saw a frightening sight,
A maniacal smiling Mike Brown gripping his wallet so tight,
There he stood in his office saying all will be well,
And I was thinking to myself, 'Loving your Bengals is certainly hell',
Then he passed on free agents as he showed me the way,
But I heard voices from the Bengals past, I thought I heard them say,

Carson's now retired in California,
He was Bengalized, it comes as no surprise,
Carson is done and retired in California,
Promising careers, they're all ended here,

Mike is financially-twisted, he's got a Mercedes Benz,
And a county full of taxpaying fools that he calls friends,
Mikey goes down to Georgetown for some sweet summer sweat,
To make heartbreaks to remember and seasons to forget,
So I called up Dave Lapham and said, 'Is there a positive sign?',
He said, 'we haven't had that spirit here since nineteen eighty nine',
Those Bengal voices are calling from far away,
So many years gone by, thought I heard them say,

Carson's now retired in California,
He was Bengalized, it comes as no surprise,
Carson is done and retired in California,
Promising careers, they're all ended here,

Retreads on the roster who've been cut once or twice,
Then Mike says 'we've even got some prisoners here just to show I am nice',
And in the family's chambers where life isn't so tough,
They count our money with their greedy hands, But they just can't get enough,
Last thing I remember, it all seemed like a dream,
I tried to do it but I couldn't stand to pull for another team,
'Relax,' said the Mike man, we are programmed to deceive,
You can retire any time you like, but you can never leave...

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In Memory of Dunn4QB
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Joined: December 8th, 2008, 2:25 am

July 31st, 2011, 4:00 pm #2

Brilliant! I love it!
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Joined: September 8th, 2003, 9:31 pm

July 31st, 2011, 7:02 pm #3

Now that's good stuff right there!
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Joined: November 25th, 2007, 12:30 am

July 31st, 2011, 7:51 pm #4

Wow. Excellent stuff.

Which reminds me... JB, are you ever going to recrd I'm a Redeemer? Not to put any pressure on you or anything... But that would motivate me to complete something I've been working on with some other people.
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" Bell-cow quarterbacks are like queen bees. Only one can take you to the land of milk and honey."
~ What Mike Brown never quite said, but should have.
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Joined: December 8th, 2008, 2:25 am

July 31st, 2011, 8:20 pm #5

I have been searchng for motivation myself psycho but I will try. I also wanted to do "You're a mean one Mister Brown" before XMAS.

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Joined: January 20th, 2001, 9:47 pm

July 31st, 2011, 9:18 pm #6

Awesome! Haha

I could do a version of the grinch but if someone can edit clever photos or the like together that's out of my expertise...well I don't want to do it.

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Joined: April 23rd, 2006, 10:26 pm

July 31st, 2011, 10:46 pm #7

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"With a quarterback greener than a first year, a hovering ghost, and a magic wand of an offense handed down from the founding fathers of the franchise, Jay Gruden is a fiery, passionate underdog in the Harry Potter mold." Geoff Hobson July 15, 2011

Brown on being back to work: "We're like Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs."


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