OT: Scared to get a mammogram

OT: Scared to get a mammogram

Joined: September 6th, 2007, 1:40 am

April 13th, 2011, 3:37 am #1

I know this is ridiculous but I have to get a mammogram to qualify for another program.

But I'm really afraid to get one.

Why am I having this problem?

I guess I feel like I have bad luck and something will turn up.
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Joined: February 6th, 2007, 12:57 am

April 13th, 2011, 4:08 am #2

The thing is, I tell myself if there was something, it is so curable and I really need to know. I've also had a few scares where they had to do additional views and u/s. I was on 6 month follow ups and now all seems to be clear. I had a cyst that looked just like a follicle on an ovary by u/s. It went away on its own. I think most of us dread them and fear delaying cycles due to possible follow up testing, but you can do it! Last year I got my first totally clear one and am now back to yearly. Good luck, you will be so happy to have it off your list.

xoxo, Tracy

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Joined: September 6th, 2007, 1:40 am

April 13th, 2011, 4:21 am #3

It's just scary.

I am surprised. I never cared about things like this. I had that 'I am invincible' feeling. But I think these experiences with infertility make me not trust my body anymore.
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Joined: September 6th, 2007, 1:40 am

April 13th, 2011, 4:04 pm #4

I know this is ridiculous but I have to get a mammogram to qualify for another program.

But I'm really afraid to get one.

Why am I having this problem?

I guess I feel like I have bad luck and something will turn up.
There's a part of me that has trouble not trying for a baby ALL THE TIME by ANY MEANS NECESSARY.

But then I get really scared of Downs' or whatever other disasters could occur should I get pregnant.

I know that's a personal decision...but I just wondered what other people do.

It feels wrong somehow to make extra careful not to get pregnant. Aren't I trying to have a baby?

Am I wrong that the risk of downs is between 4-5% when you are 45?

Perhaps if I understood what the risks really are, I would be able to make a better decision. I have a hard time getting it--is 5% a terrible risk?

What other awful things will happen should I accidentally get pregnant with my own eggs?

I guess I'm asking whether it is irresponsible to have unprotected sex...as strange a question as that is. Am I doing something wrong?

Sorry for this idiotic question. My view is whatever happens, happens and the most likely thing is miscarriage.

I only ask because I am still a teeny tiny bit fertile still and I guess I tend to be pessimistic about everything.

I should also mention that I am bizarrely superstitious about all fertility-related decisions.

I know this is kind of a ridiculous question. I just realized part of my apprehension was something cruel my (much younger) brother said to me a few years ago about how it was 'wrong' for me to keep trying to get pregnant. I wonder if it was something my dad had said to him in private. I was looking forward to explaining to him how YOUNG the eggs were I used!

People say such mean things and I know if you got pregnant with Downs and kept the baby (I would not be able to do anything else, really I wouldn't) I fear the blame of others. But maybe those people are just jerks. I certainly think they are. Am I wrong?

What is the responsible, morally OK choice? Risk it or don't risk it?

I wish people were more understanding about the complexities of human life. They want everything to be 'clean.' They want everything to be controlled. Life is messy. Kids have handicaps. We aren't in control of everything that happens.
Last edited by arive on April 13th, 2011, 4:07 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Anonymous
Anonymous

April 13th, 2011, 6:06 pm #5

You mentioned that what might happen is a m/c if you got pg at 45, maybe and maybe not...and that it wouldn't be a big setback if that happened. My problem is that a m/c was a big setback, a few months at least (waiting waiting waiting, testing, D&C, recovery, more waiting, healing, needing 2 natural normal cycles, risking scar tissue, not to mention emotional impact and grieving). I guess most of the time the natural pregnancies fizzle out pretty quickly as chemical pgs with absolutely no down time, but m/cs can also be drawn out and derail your other plans.
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Anonymous
Anonymous

April 13th, 2011, 7:08 pm #6

There's a part of me that has trouble not trying for a baby ALL THE TIME by ANY MEANS NECESSARY.

But then I get really scared of Downs' or whatever other disasters could occur should I get pregnant.

I know that's a personal decision...but I just wondered what other people do.

It feels wrong somehow to make extra careful not to get pregnant. Aren't I trying to have a baby?

Am I wrong that the risk of downs is between 4-5% when you are 45?

Perhaps if I understood what the risks really are, I would be able to make a better decision. I have a hard time getting it--is 5% a terrible risk?

What other awful things will happen should I accidentally get pregnant with my own eggs?

I guess I'm asking whether it is irresponsible to have unprotected sex...as strange a question as that is. Am I doing something wrong?

Sorry for this idiotic question. My view is whatever happens, happens and the most likely thing is miscarriage.

I only ask because I am still a teeny tiny bit fertile still and I guess I tend to be pessimistic about everything.

I should also mention that I am bizarrely superstitious about all fertility-related decisions.

I know this is kind of a ridiculous question. I just realized part of my apprehension was something cruel my (much younger) brother said to me a few years ago about how it was 'wrong' for me to keep trying to get pregnant. I wonder if it was something my dad had said to him in private. I was looking forward to explaining to him how YOUNG the eggs were I used!

People say such mean things and I know if you got pregnant with Downs and kept the baby (I would not be able to do anything else, really I wouldn't) I fear the blame of others. But maybe those people are just jerks. I certainly think they are. Am I wrong?

What is the responsible, morally OK choice? Risk it or don't risk it?

I wish people were more understanding about the complexities of human life. They want everything to be 'clean.' They want everything to be controlled. Life is messy. Kids have handicaps. We aren't in control of everything that happens.
I was too afraid too for fear of a m/c. I had suffered one m/c and an ectopic prior to DE so I didn't want to take the chance that it would derail our upcoming DE cycle. We were also cycling out of the country and I just didn't want to take that chance. But that is certainly just my opinion. Everyone has to do what feel right to them .

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anon
anon

April 13th, 2011, 7:27 pm #7

You mentioned that what might happen is a m/c if you got pg at 45, maybe and maybe not...and that it wouldn't be a big setback if that happened. My problem is that a m/c was a big setback, a few months at least (waiting waiting waiting, testing, D&C, recovery, more waiting, healing, needing 2 natural normal cycles, risking scar tissue, not to mention emotional impact and grieving). I guess most of the time the natural pregnancies fizzle out pretty quickly as chemical pgs with absolutely no down time, but m/cs can also be drawn out and derail your other plans.
not to mention that there is the possibility also, of a m/c causing such bad scarring that it could lead to asherman's, or even a resulting D&C needed that could cause scarring as well and lead to asherman's. which could render the uterus unable to have the necessary embryo implantation and/or then carry a baby to full term. it has happened to some on these boards.

at the same time there are always those reports of 45+ ladies that do conceive on their own naturally and do have healthy babies, stories we hear that are current and those that come from people with grandmothers, as example, that did just such a thing years and years ago. there is no telling who the lucky and unlucky will be unfortunately.

still goes back to the simple fact that ttc, whether natural or with ART, is a gamble either way in the grand scheme of things.

do what feels right and what is best for your heart and soul ultimately.

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Dee
Dee

April 13th, 2011, 9:05 pm #8

I know this is ridiculous but I have to get a mammogram to qualify for another program.

But I'm really afraid to get one.

Why am I having this problem?

I guess I feel like I have bad luck and something will turn up.
If you've already had a mammogram this year, they shouldn't ask you to get a "new" one for their program this soon.
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Dee
Dee

April 13th, 2011, 9:07 pm #9

There's a part of me that has trouble not trying for a baby ALL THE TIME by ANY MEANS NECESSARY.

But then I get really scared of Downs' or whatever other disasters could occur should I get pregnant.

I know that's a personal decision...but I just wondered what other people do.

It feels wrong somehow to make extra careful not to get pregnant. Aren't I trying to have a baby?

Am I wrong that the risk of downs is between 4-5% when you are 45?

Perhaps if I understood what the risks really are, I would be able to make a better decision. I have a hard time getting it--is 5% a terrible risk?

What other awful things will happen should I accidentally get pregnant with my own eggs?

I guess I'm asking whether it is irresponsible to have unprotected sex...as strange a question as that is. Am I doing something wrong?

Sorry for this idiotic question. My view is whatever happens, happens and the most likely thing is miscarriage.

I only ask because I am still a teeny tiny bit fertile still and I guess I tend to be pessimistic about everything.

I should also mention that I am bizarrely superstitious about all fertility-related decisions.

I know this is kind of a ridiculous question. I just realized part of my apprehension was something cruel my (much younger) brother said to me a few years ago about how it was 'wrong' for me to keep trying to get pregnant. I wonder if it was something my dad had said to him in private. I was looking forward to explaining to him how YOUNG the eggs were I used!

People say such mean things and I know if you got pregnant with Downs and kept the baby (I would not be able to do anything else, really I wouldn't) I fear the blame of others. But maybe those people are just jerks. I certainly think they are. Am I wrong?

What is the responsible, morally OK choice? Risk it or don't risk it?

I wish people were more understanding about the complexities of human life. They want everything to be 'clean.' They want everything to be controlled. Life is messy. Kids have handicaps. We aren't in control of everything that happens.
It depends. For some people, a 5% chance is bad. For others, its not.

I don't think a 4 or 5% chance is bad. That means you have about a 95% chance of the baby NOT having down's.
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Joined: September 6th, 2007, 1:40 am

April 14th, 2011, 4:07 am #10

You mentioned that what might happen is a m/c if you got pg at 45, maybe and maybe not...and that it wouldn't be a big setback if that happened. My problem is that a m/c was a big setback, a few months at least (waiting waiting waiting, testing, D&C, recovery, more waiting, healing, needing 2 natural normal cycles, risking scar tissue, not to mention emotional impact and grieving). I guess most of the time the natural pregnancies fizzle out pretty quickly as chemical pgs with absolutely no down time, but m/cs can also be drawn out and derail your other plans.
I guess that's what I was thinking could happen.

I can't cycle until August anyway. So maybe that's why I was thinking I would risk it.
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