New to the forum- starting DE cycle soon

New to the forum- starting DE cycle soon

Joined: June 23rd, 2012, 12:06 pm

June 23rd, 2012, 12:26 pm #1

Hi everyone. I am 42 years old and we are starting a donor egg cycle in August. We are finishing our round of tests required by the clinic, and have already chosen our donor. My situation is a bit different, I have two children already but I have always wanted a third. I am living in Singapore, and we are doing our donor egg cycle in New York. I initially tried to use my sister as a donor, but she is 37 and a doctor I saw in Singapore actually told me "Why should we make an exception for you to use a 37 year old donor (their limit is 35), you already have two children?" Needless to say, I was devastated and decided to move on and pursue this back home in New York. We later decided to use an anonymous donor (not an option in Singapore because they don't allow donors to be compensated and the number of caucasian donors volunteering out of the goodness of their hearts is slim here.) So here we are, getting ready to do our cycle in a couple of months, and I am getting excited and nervous at the same time. I am trying to temper my excitement so as not to be crushed if it doesn't work. Has anyone done donor eggs after having biological children?

1st baby - clomid/iui at age 35
2nd baby - natural conception! At 37
Working on number 3 since 2009. I have an AMH of .2 and a FSH of 27.
Quote
Like
Share

thesameboat
thesameboat

June 23rd, 2012, 2:11 pm #2

Just wanted to welcome you to the boards. There are women here who have done DE after already having children conceived with their own eggs and they've often posted here about the fact that there is no difference in mothering there. Most of the people with children post on the PG after DE board, though. Link is above. You might get more responses there. I don't have OE children. We were always infertile and years of ttc with our own eggs ended with our move to DE. We finally found success and have a daughter now.

Just a gentle nudge here. There are some topics that maybe some women might choose not to read about, so we usually put headers in the title, for example about children, miscarriages, death, pregnancy, etc.

Wishing you the best of luck with your upcoming cycle.
Quote
Share

Joined: June 23rd, 2012, 2:53 pm

June 23rd, 2012, 3:15 pm #3

Hi everyone. I am 42 years old and we are starting a donor egg cycle in August. We are finishing our round of tests required by the clinic, and have already chosen our donor. My situation is a bit different, I have two children already but I have always wanted a third. I am living in Singapore, and we are doing our donor egg cycle in New York. I initially tried to use my sister as a donor, but she is 37 and a doctor I saw in Singapore actually told me "Why should we make an exception for you to use a 37 year old donor (their limit is 35), you already have two children?" Needless to say, I was devastated and decided to move on and pursue this back home in New York. We later decided to use an anonymous donor (not an option in Singapore because they don't allow donors to be compensated and the number of caucasian donors volunteering out of the goodness of their hearts is slim here.) So here we are, getting ready to do our cycle in a couple of months, and I am getting excited and nervous at the same time. I am trying to temper my excitement so as not to be crushed if it doesn't work. Has anyone done donor eggs after having biological children?

1st baby - clomid/iui at age 35
2nd baby - natural conception! At 37
Working on number 3 since 2009. I have an AMH of .2 and a FSH of 27.
Hi Jennifer
I have been trying to find someone exactly like you to talk/share experiences.
DH and I have three (7, 10, and 12 all dd's) biological children together. We decided Oct.'09 to try again for one more. I am now 37 and DH is 41. We tried 3 rounds of clomid, uping the dosage each time with no response Ended up deciding to do an IVF cycle. RE wanted me to have an amh test done. Came back .16.
We are now doing de's as well. Have our donor match complete and will probably be cycling in August as well. Just waiting for our donor nurse to get our schedule to us.
After almost 3 years of this journey this is the only/last attempt.
I am in the same boat as feeling anxious and scared.
Would be great if we could keep in touch. Best of luck to you and all of the other couples out there struggling with this journey
Last edited by kjrobins on June 23rd, 2012, 3:26 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Quote
Like
Share

Mrs. M
Mrs. M

June 23rd, 2012, 3:50 pm #4

Hi everyone. I am 42 years old and we are starting a donor egg cycle in August. We are finishing our round of tests required by the clinic, and have already chosen our donor. My situation is a bit different, I have two children already but I have always wanted a third. I am living in Singapore, and we are doing our donor egg cycle in New York. I initially tried to use my sister as a donor, but she is 37 and a doctor I saw in Singapore actually told me "Why should we make an exception for you to use a 37 year old donor (their limit is 35), you already have two children?" Needless to say, I was devastated and decided to move on and pursue this back home in New York. We later decided to use an anonymous donor (not an option in Singapore because they don't allow donors to be compensated and the number of caucasian donors volunteering out of the goodness of their hearts is slim here.) So here we are, getting ready to do our cycle in a couple of months, and I am getting excited and nervous at the same time. I am trying to temper my excitement so as not to be crushed if it doesn't work. Has anyone done donor eggs after having biological children?

1st baby - clomid/iui at age 35
2nd baby - natural conception! At 37
Working on number 3 since 2009. I have an AMH of .2 and a FSH of 27.
You will find lots of support, info. and encouragement her.
Quote
Share

Joined: August 6th, 2011, 6:43 am

June 23rd, 2012, 4:44 pm #5

Hi everyone. I am 42 years old and we are starting a donor egg cycle in August. We are finishing our round of tests required by the clinic, and have already chosen our donor. My situation is a bit different, I have two children already but I have always wanted a third. I am living in Singapore, and we are doing our donor egg cycle in New York. I initially tried to use my sister as a donor, but she is 37 and a doctor I saw in Singapore actually told me "Why should we make an exception for you to use a 37 year old donor (their limit is 35), you already have two children?" Needless to say, I was devastated and decided to move on and pursue this back home in New York. We later decided to use an anonymous donor (not an option in Singapore because they don't allow donors to be compensated and the number of caucasian donors volunteering out of the goodness of their hearts is slim here.) So here we are, getting ready to do our cycle in a couple of months, and I am getting excited and nervous at the same time. I am trying to temper my excitement so as not to be crushed if it doesn't work. Has anyone done donor eggs after having biological children?

1st baby - clomid/iui at age 35
2nd baby - natural conception! At 37
Working on number 3 since 2009. I have an AMH of .2 and a FSH of 27.
Yes I have a baby DS after having a naturally conceived DD. I love both children the same amount and am so happy I decided to use donor eggs to have another child. I feel he is 100% my baby to love and care for. When I look at his cute little features it doesn't matter at all that they are not from my genetics. He is perfect exactly the way he is. If I would have known I would feel this way I never would have spent the money and time trying with my own eggs. I really hope your upcoming cycle works for you.
Quote
Like
Share

futurebeauty
futurebeauty

June 23rd, 2012, 9:13 pm #6

Hi everyone. I am 42 years old and we are starting a donor egg cycle in August. We are finishing our round of tests required by the clinic, and have already chosen our donor. My situation is a bit different, I have two children already but I have always wanted a third. I am living in Singapore, and we are doing our donor egg cycle in New York. I initially tried to use my sister as a donor, but she is 37 and a doctor I saw in Singapore actually told me "Why should we make an exception for you to use a 37 year old donor (their limit is 35), you already have two children?" Needless to say, I was devastated and decided to move on and pursue this back home in New York. We later decided to use an anonymous donor (not an option in Singapore because they don't allow donors to be compensated and the number of caucasian donors volunteering out of the goodness of their hearts is slim here.) So here we are, getting ready to do our cycle in a couple of months, and I am getting excited and nervous at the same time. I am trying to temper my excitement so as not to be crushed if it doesn't work. Has anyone done donor eggs after having biological children?

1st baby - clomid/iui at age 35
2nd baby - natural conception! At 37
Working on number 3 since 2009. I have an AMH of .2 and a FSH of 27.
In more ways than one as we share the same name as well but I go by a shorten version w/ an "a" at the end but on this board I am futurebeauty. Anyways, I am also 42 and have been TTC baby #3 for 3 1/2 yrs since Jan 2009 when DS was 11 months old. I had our first at 34 and second at age 37. We have had a whole enchalada of losses b/t kids and afterwards and I am too tired of writing about it all. We turned to DE last yr w/ a successful twin pg that ended in m/c and we are going to transfer 1 or 2 of our frosties in July.

DE is such a great option and I would be so blessed to turn our frosties into our last baby. My advice is to make sure you are tested for everything under the sun prior to your transfer as I thought I was in the clear but the m/c still happened. I recommend blood clotting testing and immune testing just to be sure as you do not want to find out the hard way like so many of us on this board. I am about to test for NK cells (natural killer cells) and DQ Alpha testing (similar DNA matching b/t spouses) next wk to see if anything shows up that would explain all my losses except bad luck.

I am glad to see you on this board and we are welcomed to discuss our previous success but we need to do so w/ grace and kindness as so many women were not as fortunate as us.

Good Luck,

FB
Quote
Share

Joined: June 23rd, 2012, 12:06 pm

June 24th, 2012, 9:14 am #7

Futurebeauty, that is a startling amount of similarity! I have never met anyone who wanted a large family bad enough to go through all of this! We have been trying again since August 2009.

I just had $1500 worth of blood tests, and there were at least 15 immunity tests in there. I am really hoping my insurance decides to reimburse for these, because they were expensive! Our insurance doesn't cover fertility treatments, only diagnosis. It kills me that two years ago, my RE advised IVF, but we couldn't afford it. When I finally had the money, at age 41, I went back and was told too late, now you need donor eggs. Ironically, my husband feels better about spending the money with a higher success rate than he did for using my eggs at age 39, with a success rate of around 35%.

Here is what they tested me for, among other things.

Thyroid peroxidase antibody (TPO)
Thyroglobulin antibody
Thyrotropin receptor antibody
Immunoglobulins quantitative
Antinuclear antibody
Anticardiolipin antibody
Phosphatidylserine antibody
Beta-2 g lycoprotein
Lupus anticoagulant
Anti ovarian antibodies
Anti adrenal antibodies

Good luck with your upcoming transfer! Hope your tests come back normal.
Quote
Like
Share

Joined: June 23rd, 2012, 12:06 pm

June 24th, 2012, 9:19 am #8

Just wanted to welcome you to the boards. There are women here who have done DE after already having children conceived with their own eggs and they've often posted here about the fact that there is no difference in mothering there. Most of the people with children post on the PG after DE board, though. Link is above. You might get more responses there. I don't have OE children. We were always infertile and years of ttc with our own eggs ended with our move to DE. We finally found success and have a daughter now.

Just a gentle nudge here. There are some topics that maybe some women might choose not to read about, so we usually put headers in the title, for example about children, miscarriages, death, pregnancy, etc.

Wishing you the best of luck with your upcoming cycle.
Thanks, I understand it is a sensitive topic. I have never used donor eggs before, and I have never even gone through an IVF cycle, so I figured my questions were more like a newbie's questions than someone who has already had a child using donor eggs. Yes, I know about the pregnancy and childbirth part, but I am pretty clueless on cycling with a donor and what to expect in the next few months. I'll be sure to use headers.
Quote
Like
Share

Joined: June 23rd, 2012, 12:06 pm

June 24th, 2012, 9:27 am #9

Yes I have a baby DS after having a naturally conceived DD. I love both children the same amount and am so happy I decided to use donor eggs to have another child. I feel he is 100% my baby to love and care for. When I look at his cute little features it doesn't matter at all that they are not from my genetics. He is perfect exactly the way he is. If I would have known I would feel this way I never would have spent the money and time trying with my own eggs. I really hope your upcoming cycle works for you.
Hi Raindrops, I was wondering about that! I was thinking about that last night. One of the reasons we decided to go for donor eggs rather than adoption was so I could have the pregnancy experience. I was reading an article discussing the biological vs recipient mother, and one interesting thing they pointed out was that's the way genes are expressed depends on the hormones in the Mother's womb and the genes from the father, and that while the egg donor contributes genetic material, the way the genes are expressed depends entirely on the recipient's womb and therefore the resulting baby is uniquely the recipient's, the egg donor would never have produced a baby exactly like yours. I am glad to know you feel that way, thanks for sharing!
Quote
Like
Share

Joined: June 23rd, 2012, 12:06 pm

June 24th, 2012, 9:28 am #10

You will find lots of support, info. and encouragement her.
Thanks, Mrs. M!
Quote
Like
Share