Lupron not working...can't even do fresh cycle. Need advice/thoughts/encouragement?

Lupron not working...can't even do fresh cycle. Need advice/thoughts/encouragement?

MacRita
MacRita

February 8th, 2012, 1:43 pm #1

I can't even believe it. I recall reading this happening to Seymo and couldn't believe it...must be one in a million, I thought...

Starting my very first DE cycle at SG and now the Lupron isn't successfully suppressing my completely useless ovaries after nearly 2 weeks. My FSH in my late 30s was in the 80s. I haven't had a period in over a year and now this (and its a useless attempt at ovulation, confirmed by other bloods). Can't move forward with a fresh transfer because it's a shared cycle and they can't hold up the other recipient (understandable). All doc can say is this is bizarre, he doesn't know why, but I have to keep taking it and retesting.

I'm full of anxiety now. They tell me my mock went well and I have no other issues. Since my reproductive system has done nothing but fail me for 4 years, why would I have hope? My DH keeps saying he has hope, but that hope was what kept me from moving to DE a year ago...and now i feel I've lost so much valuable time based on nonsense hope. All I can do is keep thinking the whole thing will fail, because that has been my history. If I have POF so early, and now my body won't cooperate here, what else is going to fail? And knowing that FETs have a lower success rate (looks like 52% v 36% at SG for vitrified), when I finally get to transfer the frozen embryos, why would I feel positive? I know DE isn't guaranteed, but I didn't think I would get clipped at the starting line.

--Does anyone know/has heard of lupron being ineffective long term on someone with my details? Did it cause damage?
--Does anyone know of anyone who has gone on to success despite this kind of thing?
--Presuming I can cycle at some point, and I had 2 frozen blasts, would you recommend transferring both? If they had been fresh, I would've done an eSet, since I'm learnign that for me what can go wrong will (ie, health risks to twins). Now I'm concerned even one "perfect" won't implant.

Any advice? I feel like throwing in the towel and I haven't even gotten to start.

I'm really struggling emotionally. I didn't anticipate this at all...failed transfers, I was sort of anticipating, but not self induced ones. Talking to social workers/therapists doesn't help.
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Melissa
Melissa

February 8th, 2012, 2:16 pm #2

Hi there, MacRita. First, let me say how sorry I am that I have been where you are. My cycle with my super donor was canceled in November for the same reason. Though I am still on the waiting list, I am not sure what my doc will do to try to suppress ovulation this next time around. I did not pass my mock cycle and ovulated through the Lupron, so for my actual cycle, they put me on daily Ganirelix. SO EXPENSIVE. But it didn't work for me, either. They have mentioned that they might try Depot Lupron next time for a month or longer to try to suppress me. Maybe you can ask your doctor about one of those two options?

I, too, had such feelings of confusion....my ovaries, who can NEVER seem to do their thing, went into super overdrive during the times when they were supposed to be quiet. Its so unbelievably frustrating.

I wish I had more answers for you. All I know is that my doctor was pretty flummoxed, and that I'm still pretty nervous about next time, too. I'm curious to see if others pop on here with any new ideas.

For the time being....I hope you can find a safe place to just feel your sadness and disappointment but that you can somehow find the strength you need to find peace in this journey.

Melissa
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Joined: January 29th, 2012, 10:44 pm

February 8th, 2012, 2:17 pm #3

I can't even believe it. I recall reading this happening to Seymo and couldn't believe it...must be one in a million, I thought...

Starting my very first DE cycle at SG and now the Lupron isn't successfully suppressing my completely useless ovaries after nearly 2 weeks. My FSH in my late 30s was in the 80s. I haven't had a period in over a year and now this (and its a useless attempt at ovulation, confirmed by other bloods). Can't move forward with a fresh transfer because it's a shared cycle and they can't hold up the other recipient (understandable). All doc can say is this is bizarre, he doesn't know why, but I have to keep taking it and retesting.

I'm full of anxiety now. They tell me my mock went well and I have no other issues. Since my reproductive system has done nothing but fail me for 4 years, why would I have hope? My DH keeps saying he has hope, but that hope was what kept me from moving to DE a year ago...and now i feel I've lost so much valuable time based on nonsense hope. All I can do is keep thinking the whole thing will fail, because that has been my history. If I have POF so early, and now my body won't cooperate here, what else is going to fail? And knowing that FETs have a lower success rate (looks like 52% v 36% at SG for vitrified), when I finally get to transfer the frozen embryos, why would I feel positive? I know DE isn't guaranteed, but I didn't think I would get clipped at the starting line.

--Does anyone know/has heard of lupron being ineffective long term on someone with my details? Did it cause damage?
--Does anyone know of anyone who has gone on to success despite this kind of thing?
--Presuming I can cycle at some point, and I had 2 frozen blasts, would you recommend transferring both? If they had been fresh, I would've done an eSet, since I'm learnign that for me what can go wrong will (ie, health risks to twins). Now I'm concerned even one "perfect" won't implant.

Any advice? I feel like throwing in the towel and I haven't even gotten to start.

I'm really struggling emotionally. I didn't anticipate this at all...failed transfers, I was sort of anticipating, but not self induced ones. Talking to social workers/therapists doesn't help.
So sorry to read about your predicament. I'm also in shared program @ SG starting my first DE cycle.. I started Lupron yesterday. ET scheduled for 3/8. I have been trying to prepare for anything and everything that could go wrong along the way. After reading your story, I realize there is no way to fully prepare. My thoughts are with you and all I can say is DON"T GIVE UP!!! Keep your eye on the prize and remember what has brought you to this point. I don't want to try and blow alot of sunshine up your a$$, cuz you probly don't want to hear it, but take and deep breath and remember why you are doing this! KEEP TRYING!!!! Go through all your emotions, don't deny yourself, then move forward. You don't want to have any regrets!
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MacRita
MacRita

February 8th, 2012, 3:05 pm #4

I can't even believe it. I recall reading this happening to Seymo and couldn't believe it...must be one in a million, I thought...

Starting my very first DE cycle at SG and now the Lupron isn't successfully suppressing my completely useless ovaries after nearly 2 weeks. My FSH in my late 30s was in the 80s. I haven't had a period in over a year and now this (and its a useless attempt at ovulation, confirmed by other bloods). Can't move forward with a fresh transfer because it's a shared cycle and they can't hold up the other recipient (understandable). All doc can say is this is bizarre, he doesn't know why, but I have to keep taking it and retesting.

I'm full of anxiety now. They tell me my mock went well and I have no other issues. Since my reproductive system has done nothing but fail me for 4 years, why would I have hope? My DH keeps saying he has hope, but that hope was what kept me from moving to DE a year ago...and now i feel I've lost so much valuable time based on nonsense hope. All I can do is keep thinking the whole thing will fail, because that has been my history. If I have POF so early, and now my body won't cooperate here, what else is going to fail? And knowing that FETs have a lower success rate (looks like 52% v 36% at SG for vitrified), when I finally get to transfer the frozen embryos, why would I feel positive? I know DE isn't guaranteed, but I didn't think I would get clipped at the starting line.

--Does anyone know/has heard of lupron being ineffective long term on someone with my details? Did it cause damage?
--Does anyone know of anyone who has gone on to success despite this kind of thing?
--Presuming I can cycle at some point, and I had 2 frozen blasts, would you recommend transferring both? If they had been fresh, I would've done an eSet, since I'm learnign that for me what can go wrong will (ie, health risks to twins). Now I'm concerned even one "perfect" won't implant.

Any advice? I feel like throwing in the towel and I haven't even gotten to start.

I'm really struggling emotionally. I didn't anticipate this at all...failed transfers, I was sort of anticipating, but not self induced ones. Talking to social workers/therapists doesn't help.
You'll never get to cycle? And that our ovaries might never shut down properly? I thought I was technically in menopause, so don't understand this at all.

I'm beside myself.
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Denise
Denise

February 8th, 2012, 3:45 pm #5

One idea to consider is freezing your embryos, then doing a(( natural FET)) according to your cycle when the embryos are transferred with only progesterone support..
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Julie
Julie

February 8th, 2012, 4:24 pm #6

I can't even believe it. I recall reading this happening to Seymo and couldn't believe it...must be one in a million, I thought...

Starting my very first DE cycle at SG and now the Lupron isn't successfully suppressing my completely useless ovaries after nearly 2 weeks. My FSH in my late 30s was in the 80s. I haven't had a period in over a year and now this (and its a useless attempt at ovulation, confirmed by other bloods). Can't move forward with a fresh transfer because it's a shared cycle and they can't hold up the other recipient (understandable). All doc can say is this is bizarre, he doesn't know why, but I have to keep taking it and retesting.

I'm full of anxiety now. They tell me my mock went well and I have no other issues. Since my reproductive system has done nothing but fail me for 4 years, why would I have hope? My DH keeps saying he has hope, but that hope was what kept me from moving to DE a year ago...and now i feel I've lost so much valuable time based on nonsense hope. All I can do is keep thinking the whole thing will fail, because that has been my history. If I have POF so early, and now my body won't cooperate here, what else is going to fail? And knowing that FETs have a lower success rate (looks like 52% v 36% at SG for vitrified), when I finally get to transfer the frozen embryos, why would I feel positive? I know DE isn't guaranteed, but I didn't think I would get clipped at the starting line.

--Does anyone know/has heard of lupron being ineffective long term on someone with my details? Did it cause damage?
--Does anyone know of anyone who has gone on to success despite this kind of thing?
--Presuming I can cycle at some point, and I had 2 frozen blasts, would you recommend transferring both? If they had been fresh, I would've done an eSet, since I'm learnign that for me what can go wrong will (ie, health risks to twins). Now I'm concerned even one "perfect" won't implant.

Any advice? I feel like throwing in the towel and I haven't even gotten to start.

I'm really struggling emotionally. I didn't anticipate this at all...failed transfers, I was sort of anticipating, but not self induced ones. Talking to social workers/therapists doesn't help.
I am so sorry -- I know you feel just crushed. I don't have any advice on what to do about your ovaries BUT I did want to make sure you knew my FET was successful at SG. My DD was the result of an FET of a tx of 2 6-day blasts. Oh gosh what a curve ball you have had thrown at you. THinking of you.
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Melissa
Melissa

February 8th, 2012, 4:26 pm #7

One idea to consider is freezing your embryos, then doing a(( natural FET)) according to your cycle when the embryos are transferred with only progesterone support..
Yes, that was another option presented to us, to go ahead and make the embryos and then freeze them. Our clinic doesn't do vitrification, and so it didn't really seem worth it to us.

I really really hope it doesn't mean we can't cycle, MacRita. I really hope. But, like you and others have pointed out, I sometimes feel like there is literally no limit to the number of ways in which this can not work . It is so frustrating and scary how much control we do not have, and how much of this is out of everyone's (even the doctor's) control.

I have had to take a break from all of this to finish some academic work, which has been good and bad at the same time. It is nice not to be obsessing about every twinge, every blood draw, every phone call. I think that when I can focus more energy on this again, I will likely start calling some of the big names, like in San Diego, and just ask for some phone consults about their ideas about how to approach a case like ours. If I get that far, I will be sure to share it with all of you.

Melissa
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MacRita
MacRita

February 8th, 2012, 4:48 pm #8

I am so sorry -- I know you feel just crushed. I don't have any advice on what to do about your ovaries BUT I did want to make sure you knew my FET was successful at SG. My DD was the result of an FET of a tx of 2 6-day blasts. Oh gosh what a curve ball you have had thrown at you. THinking of you.
Thank you. ((hugs)) I will meditate on that response.
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MacRita
MacRita

February 8th, 2012, 4:50 pm #9

Yes, that was another option presented to us, to go ahead and make the embryos and then freeze them. Our clinic doesn't do vitrification, and so it didn't really seem worth it to us.

I really really hope it doesn't mean we can't cycle, MacRita. I really hope. But, like you and others have pointed out, I sometimes feel like there is literally no limit to the number of ways in which this can not work . It is so frustrating and scary how much control we do not have, and how much of this is out of everyone's (even the doctor's) control.

I have had to take a break from all of this to finish some academic work, which has been good and bad at the same time. It is nice not to be obsessing about every twinge, every blood draw, every phone call. I think that when I can focus more energy on this again, I will likely start calling some of the big names, like in San Diego, and just ask for some phone consults about their ideas about how to approach a case like ours. If I get that far, I will be sure to share it with all of you.

Melissa
Sending angry "shut down!" vibes to your ovaries. They have to knock it off at some point, right?
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MacRita
MacRita

February 8th, 2012, 4:52 pm #10

One idea to consider is freezing your embryos, then doing a(( natural FET)) according to your cycle when the embryos are transferred with only progesterone support..
I wonder if it's possible that the lupron is forcing my pituitary to work harder in opposition to it, as if it's still fighting that initial lupron surge that happens (I think) the first day or so you take it. After all, when you have high FSH, don't drugs that stim you for IVF cause FSH to go even higher (to no effect)?

I'm partially tempted to go off it and then retest, see what happens. But of course, I'm afraid to...
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