A little encouragement

A little encouragement

Wannababy
Wannababy

March 14th, 2011, 5:12 am #1

Hi ladies,
I am the mother of 3 de children, two different donors. This can work. My oldest was success on our first try. We only got 3 fertilized, two survived til transfer. We had a singleton. Three years later we tried again with the same donor. We did one fresh and two frozen transfers, all bfn. Then we chose a new donor. She became very ill and everything stopped. We then started over, but finally found a new donor. We had our twins last year. This process allowed us to be parents and me to experience pregnancy twice. I hardly visit this board anymore, but just wanted to give some encouragement. I know I have the children I was meant to have. And yes people tell me they look nothing like me to which I just say, I know, they look like their dad. We are telling our children and I've started that process. It does make me sad a bit that I will never see a genetic child of mine and I can't trace the histories of my kids. But I can't imagine my life without my kids. I really feel that my infertility was a blessing because without it, these wonderful, beautiful, smart, strong little people wouldn't exist.
Good luck to all of you.
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MacRita
MacRita

March 14th, 2011, 9:27 pm #2

Thanks for taking time from all your responsibilities to say that. I needed to hear it. Had a very tough weekend coming to grips with my reality here.

All the best to you.
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keifel
keifel

March 15th, 2011, 2:44 am #3

Hi ladies,
I am the mother of 3 de children, two different donors. This can work. My oldest was success on our first try. We only got 3 fertilized, two survived til transfer. We had a singleton. Three years later we tried again with the same donor. We did one fresh and two frozen transfers, all bfn. Then we chose a new donor. She became very ill and everything stopped. We then started over, but finally found a new donor. We had our twins last year. This process allowed us to be parents and me to experience pregnancy twice. I hardly visit this board anymore, but just wanted to give some encouragement. I know I have the children I was meant to have. And yes people tell me they look nothing like me to which I just say, I know, they look like their dad. We are telling our children and I've started that process. It does make me sad a bit that I will never see a genetic child of mine and I can't trace the histories of my kids. But I can't imagine my life without my kids. I really feel that my infertility was a blessing because without it, these wonderful, beautiful, smart, strong little people wouldn't exist.
Good luck to all of you.
I can use all that I can get!
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Joined: October 22nd, 2010, 7:15 am

March 15th, 2011, 4:01 am #4

Hi ladies,
I am the mother of 3 de children, two different donors. This can work. My oldest was success on our first try. We only got 3 fertilized, two survived til transfer. We had a singleton. Three years later we tried again with the same donor. We did one fresh and two frozen transfers, all bfn. Then we chose a new donor. She became very ill and everything stopped. We then started over, but finally found a new donor. We had our twins last year. This process allowed us to be parents and me to experience pregnancy twice. I hardly visit this board anymore, but just wanted to give some encouragement. I know I have the children I was meant to have. And yes people tell me they look nothing like me to which I just say, I know, they look like their dad. We are telling our children and I've started that process. It does make me sad a bit that I will never see a genetic child of mine and I can't trace the histories of my kids. But I can't imagine my life without my kids. I really feel that my infertility was a blessing because without it, these wonderful, beautiful, smart, strong little people wouldn't exist.
Good luck to all of you.
At least they do in my case. It's that mantra of "Keep your eyes on the prize." It is so encouraging to see women get up and keep going, and hoping, and fighting and believing even when the things that are visible to the eyes say otherwise. There are so many things along the way that would make even the most hearty among us want to give up. But it's that glimpse of the possibilities on the other side, and I find that energy to take another shot, or put up with crazy hormonal induced mood swings or hot flashes or headaches, or my newest fun symptom...joint pain. But the thought of the other side of the mountain, the beautiful, happy, finally "at peace" side of the mountain is making this rocky climb worth it.

Thanks for taking time to write your note and for caring enough to send words of encouragement to women who are where you have been.

All the best to you and your family!
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Joined: September 6th, 2007, 1:40 am

March 15th, 2011, 4:35 am #5

Hi ladies,
I am the mother of 3 de children, two different donors. This can work. My oldest was success on our first try. We only got 3 fertilized, two survived til transfer. We had a singleton. Three years later we tried again with the same donor. We did one fresh and two frozen transfers, all bfn. Then we chose a new donor. She became very ill and everything stopped. We then started over, but finally found a new donor. We had our twins last year. This process allowed us to be parents and me to experience pregnancy twice. I hardly visit this board anymore, but just wanted to give some encouragement. I know I have the children I was meant to have. And yes people tell me they look nothing like me to which I just say, I know, they look like their dad. We are telling our children and I've started that process. It does make me sad a bit that I will never see a genetic child of mine and I can't trace the histories of my kids. But I can't imagine my life without my kids. I really feel that my infertility was a blessing because without it, these wonderful, beautiful, smart, strong little people wouldn't exist.
Good luck to all of you.
This can be VERY discouraging.

I know I will love my kid so much--if I can just get to that point.

I would love a genetic child but I don't really have any doubts I'll be CRAZY about my DE kid too.
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Joined: April 27th, 2007, 10:46 am

March 15th, 2011, 9:37 am #6

Hi ladies,
I am the mother of 3 de children, two different donors. This can work. My oldest was success on our first try. We only got 3 fertilized, two survived til transfer. We had a singleton. Three years later we tried again with the same donor. We did one fresh and two frozen transfers, all bfn. Then we chose a new donor. She became very ill and everything stopped. We then started over, but finally found a new donor. We had our twins last year. This process allowed us to be parents and me to experience pregnancy twice. I hardly visit this board anymore, but just wanted to give some encouragement. I know I have the children I was meant to have. And yes people tell me they look nothing like me to which I just say, I know, they look like their dad. We are telling our children and I've started that process. It does make me sad a bit that I will never see a genetic child of mine and I can't trace the histories of my kids. But I can't imagine my life without my kids. I really feel that my infertility was a blessing because without it, these wonderful, beautiful, smart, strong little people wouldn't exist.
Good luck to all of you.
We have the kids we were meant to have. They don't look like me either but we picked a donor who could have been a cousin of mine, so it was just by chance that Buddy resembles hubby and Girlie resembles, er, herself.

My first M/C was 16 years before we heard of DE, and it was a rough 16 years, but once we had the kids a lot of the heartache (not all) left. I can go to shopping malls now, or child-friendly restaurants without wanting to leave immediately.

I lurked on this board for a long time before posting. Now I mostly post on the pink board, but sometimes come here to see if I can offer any suggestions. Other sources of help were PVED (see "forum" on left of page): http://www.parentsviaeggdonation.org/v2/index.html

and Surrotalk (we needed a surrogate too): http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/Su ... d=81283401

I also received a lot of support from my local Resolve Egg Donor group. If you are interested, go to www.resolve.org and look for regional groups in your area.
Last edited by Obie9 on March 15th, 2011, 10:45 am, edited 1 time in total.
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