My sister's bloke, divorced now, not seen him for 20 odd years - but he was a cock. A cockney cock. When I first met him I thought he was alright. Liked a drink and a smoke, was funny, liked a laugh. He was a breath of fresh air in our usually sombre household. As time went on I realised what a self-opinionated tool he was. He'd done it better, bigger, faster etc. My brother hated him and they got into a blazing prog rock row. He (b.i.l) was going on about Rick Wakeman,
'He was brilliant in E.L.P - his keyboard skills were out of this world'
'He wasn't in E.L.P'
'He was, I've got all their stuff'
'How the fuck could Rick Wakeman be in E.L.P? Emerson, Lake & Palmer. The clue's in the name you fanny. It's not Emerson, Lake & Palmer and er...Wakeman is it you tit?'
'Look, I grew up with this stuff. I think I know a little bit more about it than you'
This went on for ages. Brother in law got more and more frustrated. My brother eventually called him a fucking ignorant twat and went upstairs to put his Clash T-shirt on. Brother in law was last seen in his car with the glove compartment open desperately rifling through the liner notes to his ELP cassettes searching for Rick, wide-eyed and sweating, tossing the cases over his shoulder.
Anyone else got dicks for brother in laws/brothers in law? Either.