Wrestling Icons Weigh In.

Wrestling Icons Weigh In.

pat
pat

July 11th, 2012, 3:49 am #1

Prompted by the latest revelation that German speaking foreigners (possibly from Austria, Luxembourg or Prussia, God forbid) have been stealing summit registers in the Idaho mountains, I solicited input from WWE wrestling superstars Kane and Undertaker. As some of you may recall, the "Brothers of Destruction" took up the cause a few years ago when other miscreants began the epidemic of register thefts in our fair state. A phone call to their agent last Wednesday, was promptly returned and it was agreed to meet last week on the summit of Lorenzo Peak near Sun Valley.

As you can imagine, it is quite intimidating to interview living legends like Kane and Undertaker, so I cautiously attempted to break the ice with manly wrestling conversation. "I was thrilled to see you fellows fighting one another in Wrestlemania XIV this past winter. I hope there are no hard feelings between you two", I meekly commented.

"Listen, Amigo, we've come here to discuss peak bagging and register thievery, not wrestling" responded the Undertaker. "Our manager would have a hissy fit if he knew we were discussing wrestling without compensation."

"Kane and I thought we had put this issue to rest a few years ago when we promised to crush the register thief's skull if we ever caught him" noted the older of the "Brothers of Destruction".

"I am truly dismayed that the thief is still out there" added 7 foot younger brother, Kane.

"I have an idea who may be behind this skullduggery" stated Kane. "The Iron Sheik sometimes speaks German when no one is listening."

"Now that you mention it, Little Bro, last time I saw the Sheik, I swear he had several film canisters in his wrestling trunks" commented Undertaker.

"Good observation, Big Bro. However, recall that last time we saw the Sheik, he was assisting the Divas with some new wrestling holds."

"Correct as usual, partner. Those may not have been film canisters after all."

Undertaker turned to me. "We will keep an eye out for the missing summit registers. And our promise still stands, if we catch that register stealing Kraut, we will break his face."

"Thanks a lot" I responded.

At this, the Brothers ended the interview and abruptly turned to scree ski down the West Face, leaving me in disbelief and awe.

"Good luck at RAW!" I shouted.


The auto-timer caught Kane and Undertaker with me on the summit of Lorenzo Peak. Kane was wearing his attractive new mask for the interview.

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Bob
Bob

July 11th, 2012, 2:51 pm #2

I'm old enough to say I have seen this kind of thing before. It seems innocent at first (like an itch in your throat before that nasty head cold sets in) but before you know it, it infects an entire generation.

First, a climber is introduced to a seemingly harmless breakfast of this;



This soon leads to experimentation and harder things such as this;



And the infection rapidly moves to the brain and it can't be stopped;



Before you know it, millions are infected;



Soon, we begin to suspect others, even our friends. (Splattski, is that a Fellows commercial shreader you were carrying on Gannett? I was sucking air big-time and my vision was blurry but when I recently looked closer at our photos I gasped. Good thing the register was buried in snow.



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Luddite
Luddite

July 11th, 2012, 3:29 pm #3

Prompted by the latest revelation that German speaking foreigners (possibly from Austria, Luxembourg or Prussia, God forbid) have been stealing summit registers in the Idaho mountains, I solicited input from WWE wrestling superstars Kane and Undertaker. As some of you may recall, the "Brothers of Destruction" took up the cause a few years ago when other miscreants began the epidemic of register thefts in our fair state. A phone call to their agent last Wednesday, was promptly returned and it was agreed to meet last week on the summit of Lorenzo Peak near Sun Valley.

As you can imagine, it is quite intimidating to interview living legends like Kane and Undertaker, so I cautiously attempted to break the ice with manly wrestling conversation. "I was thrilled to see you fellows fighting one another in Wrestlemania XIV this past winter. I hope there are no hard feelings between you two", I meekly commented.

"Listen, Amigo, we've come here to discuss peak bagging and register thievery, not wrestling" responded the Undertaker. "Our manager would have a hissy fit if he knew we were discussing wrestling without compensation."

"Kane and I thought we had put this issue to rest a few years ago when we promised to crush the register thief's skull if we ever caught him" noted the older of the "Brothers of Destruction".

"I am truly dismayed that the thief is still out there" added 7 foot younger brother, Kane.

"I have an idea who may be behind this skullduggery" stated Kane. "The Iron Sheik sometimes speaks German when no one is listening."

"Now that you mention it, Little Bro, last time I saw the Sheik, I swear he had several film canisters in his wrestling trunks" commented Undertaker.

"Good observation, Big Bro. However, recall that last time we saw the Sheik, he was assisting the Divas with some new wrestling holds."

"Correct as usual, partner. Those may not have been film canisters after all."

Undertaker turned to me. "We will keep an eye out for the missing summit registers. And our promise still stands, if we catch that register stealing Kraut, we will break his face."

"Thanks a lot" I responded.

At this, the Brothers ended the interview and abruptly turned to scree ski down the West Face, leaving me in disbelief and awe.

"Good luck at RAW!" I shouted.


The auto-timer caught Kane and Undertaker with me on the summit of Lorenzo Peak. Kane was wearing his attractive new mask for the interview.
Maybe if the register thieves would do a bit more of this:



They would see that the stealing of the registers is just petty. I also believe that getting worked up about not having a Tchotchke to sign is kind of petty, as well. BUT, I always remember Dan's good point about having more info for SAR to narrow a search down. I wonder if the same people would feel right about ripping out a Trailhead register?

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Joined: October 3rd, 2006, 6:10 pm

July 11th, 2012, 6:01 pm #4

According to the ultimate source of truth and knowledge.... Wikipedia

"Michael Reardon was one of only a few professional Free Solo climbers. He traveled the world looking for the next ultimate solo climb, giving motivational speeches and presenting slideshows.

Reardon was known for leaving mementos for those who follow him. Examples include plastic tigers attached to bolts and over-sized panties in summit registers."

Michael Reardon later commented the following after doing the Palisade Traverse of california in 22 hours.

"Basically ran from Starlight to Bishop Pass Trail
Vomited at Winchell
Dry heaved at Bishop Pass trailhead with a bunch of tourists around - not pleasant.
Sun was getting lower and wanted to get back over to east side to camp past Sam Mack meadow before sun went down (headlamp on trail rather than bivy/get lost) and walking off the vomit feeling started base of peaks on west side to get pictures and enjoying what just happened, then began following obvious footpath up into a notch ended up going to the point of no return and topped out at North Palisade - Mark Niles on the walkie-talkie he was waiting for me in Glacier Notch I traversed back to Sill, then down the third class to the tent and best damn soup I ever had!
Personal:
6 pairs of panties
Donatello for conversation
5 tubes of Vagesil
Only signed one summit register Polemonium (after the wildflower/John )
Purple panties to match purple flower
Polemonium Eximium: the sky pilot. Purple flower that typically grows above 12,000 feet and lined the entire ridge, very cool experience
Michael"
http://www.supertopo.com/climbing/threa ... _id=835934

What can I say, California.... Land of fruits and nuts.
Kevin
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Ray Brooks
Ray Brooks

July 11th, 2012, 6:14 pm #5

Could be space aliens stealing those summit registers.

We captured this image back by the Rakers in 2006. The craft was hovering over Stein Sitzmark, but did not remove him.




If not, it sound like my cuzins could fix the problem, and the problem creator.



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Geo
Geo

July 11th, 2012, 6:50 pm #6

I'm old enough to say I have seen this kind of thing before. It seems innocent at first (like an itch in your throat before that nasty head cold sets in) but before you know it, it infects an entire generation.

First, a climber is introduced to a seemingly harmless breakfast of this;



This soon leads to experimentation and harder things such as this;



And the infection rapidly moves to the brain and it can't be stopped;



Before you know it, millions are infected;



Soon, we begin to suspect others, even our friends. (Splattski, is that a Fellows commercial shreader you were carrying on Gannett? I was sucking air big-time and my vision was blurry but when I recently looked closer at our photos I gasped. Good thing the register was buried in snow.


I think the register thievery is caused by infections from parasites like this one:



I found this little Lemhi hitchhiker on my torso at my lower ribs. Must be about where the backpack strap wraps around. Took it to work and put it under a scope to make sure I got the head. It was still wiggling and holding on to that chunk of skin.

I may wake up with the urge to steal something. Just to be safe, I'm not going to climb alone for a while.

-George
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splattski
splattski

July 11th, 2012, 6:54 pm #7

Could be space aliens stealing those summit registers.

We captured this image back by the Rakers in 2006. The craft was hovering over Stein Sitzmark, but did not remove him.




If not, it sound like my cuzins could fix the problem, and the problem creator.


I don't mean to create a rush (pun intended) to the summit, but there was a little bag o' green in the summit register on Cramer.
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Bob
Bob

July 11th, 2012, 8:22 pm #8

I think the register thievery is caused by infections from parasites like this one:



I found this little Lemhi hitchhiker on my torso at my lower ribs. Must be about where the backpack strap wraps around. Took it to work and put it under a scope to make sure I got the head. It was still wiggling and holding on to that chunk of skin.

I may wake up with the urge to steal something. Just to be safe, I'm not going to climb alone for a while.

-George
Dr Geo,

I got sick from a tick and ate so much granola I felt like I was developing bovine or equine characteristics. Is there any hope for me?


Bob


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Geo
Geo

July 11th, 2012, 9:17 pm #9

Hmm, dat's vely intelesting! You'd be faily safe as a equine. Tell me, when you have da bovine feelings, do you get excited when you pass by da cows? Do you like der smell? If so, you may live a vely long and happy life as a bull! If not, it's off to da feed lot for da steer and...

-George
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Smoove
Smoove

July 11th, 2012, 9:53 pm #10

I don't mean to create a rush (pun intended) to the summit, but there was a little bag o' green in the summit register on Cramer.
That was just moldy tobacco...
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