When will my comfort come?

Retraining the conscious mind

When will my comfort come?

Rickgoldx5
Rickgoldx5

January 28th, 2006, 7:15 am #1

forza-d-animo (Original Message) Sent: 1/27/2006 9:32 AM

When will my comfort come?



Tomorrow. For every newbie who has recently asked or is getting ready to ask that question, the answer is tomorrow. At exactly 9:00 am EST comfort will come to everyone who quit smoking since the beginning of the new year 2006. Synchronize your watches, and get ready to let out a collective Woo Hoo! You will never have another thought about smoking. You will no longer crave nicotine. You will no longer be angry or sad. The frustrations of quitting will melt away like the last stubborn pile of snow on a warm spring day. That is tomorrow at 9:00 AM. If you are not ready, you will miss it.



Does that sound ridiculous? It should. Can I predict when you will start to feel better because He or She started to feel better after 32 days, and they looked a lot like you. Because Ellen weighed about the same as you and was the same age as you, you will start to feel comfort at 47 days because that is when she began to feel comfort. Don't expect it a moment sooner or a moment after. If you are a man then of course Ellen's recovery has no bearing on when you will feel comfort.



Still sound ridiculous? It should. We all want to know when, because if we know when, then we can start counting the days down until comfort arrives like the Avon lady ringing the bell. Ding Dong - Comfort calling. Not knowing is what makes it difficult because you are waiting for an event. Something solid like a milestone, a medal of honor, a diploma that is unmitigated proof that I have graduated, I am cured of my addiction and it says so right here ... You may have expected that you would feel better by now. Because you have not, you think something is wrong - You are growing impatient.



Many have posted recently in response to these questions that recovery is not an event, it is a journey. It is a lifelong comittment to never take another puff. You are never cured of nicotine addiction. Despite the promise you make to never take another puff, you must learn to live with your addiction one day at a time. This is something that newcomers find difficult to understand. How can you tell me forever and then in the same breath tell me one day at a time? My answer to you is you will understand, but only if you never take another puff. When you truly understand one day at a time, you will find it a powerful ally in all of your life.



Your decision to quit smoking was made because you all recognized the health risks associated with continuing to inhale smoke from burning tobacco that has been laced with hundreds of additives and the byproducts of burning it. Few of you, if any, before finding this site, recognized why you smoked or understood nicotine addiction like you do now. My mother recently had lens replacement surgery. I went with her to the drug store to fill a precsription for 1 Oz. of eye drops that act as an antibiotic. The cost of the prescription was more than $60.00. At that same drug store, I can purchase over the counter, one days supply of the most powerfully addictive subtance known to man, for about $5.75. So if you ever get tired of waiting, or don't believe us who have walked the road ahead of you, you can always go buy a pack of over the counter dopamine rush. It is readily available and comparatively inexpensive.

Much of your experience with recovery from nicotine addiction is dependent upon your attitude towards the experience. It has all been said before as well in many well written posts. If you take the attitude that everything you face is part of the healing process then what you face becomes a source of encouragement instead of a source of discouragement. (If this goes on like this, I will never make it.) Take credit for what you have done and understand the significance of having quit.

If you are posting on this forum then you have quit. You have made it. You are already there. I quit smoking more than 15 months ago, but If I were to smoke a cigarette today then those 15 months would mean absolutely nothing. Nothing, because I smoked today. When I post my stats, I don't post my name and the length of time as if it were some sort of badge of honor. It is simply proof that it can be done. The further I get from my last puff, the more precious each day becomes because I never want to experience withdrawl again, not for 3 days nor for the 30 seconds it took me to pull a cigarette from the box in my breast pocket, pack it on my thumb nail and spark it up.


If you want to wait until tomorrow at 9:00 AM, you may feel a difference or you can decide that right now things are infinitely better than they were when you were still smoking or chewing or however you got your nicotine. They will continue to get better too, as long as you never take another puff.

Joseph

1 Year, 3 Months, 1 Week, 6 Days, 15 hours, 18 minutes and 58 seconds
One day at a time
Last edited by Rickgoldx5 on July 24th, 2009, 2:00 am, edited 2 times in total.
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KatieDidIt1999
KatieDidIt1999

January 28th, 2006, 7:33 am #2

This was absolutely the perfect message. First of all, I never laughed so hard in my life, thought I'd never get through the first 3 paragraphs! In those 3 hilarious paragraphs I saw myself...a newly quit smoker with 3 weeks behind me waiting for that magical moment ....and this was my answer . Thank you. You know, even though there aren't many hours that go by yet that I don't think about smoking, I am definately more comfortable than I was 3 weeks ago! I must be pretty happy with that too. After all I bought cigs for 33 years, I certainly know how to do it but chose not to today. Thank you for that wonderful eye opening post.
Kat
Last edited by KatieDidIt1999 on December 19th, 2009, 11:18 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Aprilangel1951
Aprilangel1951

January 28th, 2006, 1:33 pm #3

Joseph,
Thanks so much for this post you must have read my mind as this is just what I needed!! At almost 4 weeks I am asking myself this question although I do realize there can be no answer. Things are definately better then that first week so why isn't that enough? I had to stop and remind myself that I am coughing less,breathing better,have more energy and can climb a flight of stairs now without having to stop half way to catch my breath!!! Why are we so obsessed with wanting that comfort that we fail to celebrate the healing taking place in us and be thankful for how far we have come? Remember to live in the present and appreciate the miracle that is taking place in each of us,comfort will come!
Carol
26 days of healing!
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FoolishWorkinj
FoolishWorkinj

January 31st, 2006, 10:57 pm #4

great message, and one I will need to read often. What a big baby a nicotine addict can be -- and I'm really good at whining. Just for today, I'm going to remember the good stuff, be grateful, and change attitude without a fix.
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sondrat123
sondrat123

February 1st, 2006, 1:50 am #5

Thank you for this. It inspired me and I even quoted it to a loved one who is 5 days quit. I also do not mention my time quit for pride but to show it can be done. I have felt times of "comfort" and, though fleeting, they felt good enough to know more is on the way!!!

Sandy 25 days nicotine free
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Starshinegrl Gold
Starshinegrl Gold

February 1st, 2006, 9:54 pm #6

Joseph, thank you so much for this post.
I just wish you had written it about 12 months ago ... just at the time when I was thinking about the What is comfort? question such a lot and never could hear enough about this magic word.
It is still amazing for me to have joined those who are now saying
"It will get better.
Comfort will come.
There is absolutely no need to rush -
enjoy this wonderful journey you have set out on!"
Wishing you and all of us another nicotine free day!
Gitte
432 days and a bit
Last edited by Starshinegrl Gold on December 19th, 2009, 11:14 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Em B 12106
Em B 12106

February 2nd, 2006, 1:24 am #7

I think in a lot of ways it's about letting the calm come. We've been programmed for so long and so thoroughly to believe that ridding ourselves of nicotine is difficult/miserable/uncomfortable/hard/etc. that we're forever vigilant of those feelings and thereby perpetuate them on ourselves. What we focus on multiplies, so try changing your focus. It doesn't have to be such a struggle. Just let the calm come. It's almost like we must completely retrain our brains because nicotine has hijacked our thought patterns for so long. I've found that by simply changing my enviornment I can stop the discomfort in it's tracks: if it's quiet, turn on music or the t.v., if it's dark, turn on a light, go to another room, put down your current activity (book) and pick up another (make a snack). It may sound overly simple but sometimes it's just enough to stop all of those habitual thoughts and get me started down a new thought pathway simply filled to the rim with calm. Recognize the angst for what it is and then by all means, move on. Nobody ever said you had to STAY there and wallow in it. If you meditate, you'll have more practice at this sort of thing. I hope this is helpful... it's a bit hard to explain to someone else. Some would refer to it as mind over matter. I just think we have more control over our thoughts and feelings than nicotine ever allowed us to believe.
Em
One week, three days, 14 hours, 15 minutes and 28 seconds. 158 cigarettes not smoked, saving $33.69. Life saved: 13 hours, 10 minutes.
Last edited by Em B 12106 on December 19th, 2009, 11:15 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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LeoEx Smoker
LeoEx Smoker

February 2nd, 2006, 8:47 am #8

Hey Joseph,

Really, really funny. The Avon Lady of Comfort, perfect. I'm sending this to mates.

Absolutely spot on the mark too - for a moment, I was thinking idiotically and hopefully - what, there IS a time when total comfort arrives?

Thanks, NTAP,

Leonie

Leo - Free and Healing for One Month and 7 Minutes, while extending my life expectancy 3 Days and 18 Hours, by avoiding the use of 1085 nicotine delivery devices that would have cost me $478.09.
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KatieDidIt1999
KatieDidIt1999

March 5th, 2006, 11:10 pm #9

Kat
Free for 2 Months, 2 Days, 2 hours and 38 minutes (61 days). $284.15 saved, 1,833 cigarettes not smoked. I have not stood freezing or frying in the elements for 6 Days, 8 hours and 45 minutes of my life. Quit date: 1/3/2006 7:30 AM
Last edited by KatieDidIt1999 on December 19th, 2009, 11:16 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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flymikee1
flymikee1

May 19th, 2006, 8:43 am #10

Well said!!!!

The key is as said "If you take the attitude that everything you face is part of the healing process then what you face becomes a source of encouragement instead of a source of discouragement."

It's all perception!!-

Change can be difficult depeding on how it is percieved....

Insanity=doing the same things over and over again expecting different results-

The opposite=Change> which is not usually a comfort zone!!!


Mike - Free and Healing for Eleven Days, 23 Hours and 42 Minutes, while extending my life expectancy 1 Day and 10 Hours, by avoiding the use of 420 nicotine delivery devices that would have cost me $62.97.
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GracefromOz45
GracefromOz45

May 19th, 2006, 6:47 pm #11

Brilliant!

and oh so timely, thank you.


Free and Healing for One Month, Fourteen Days and 1 Minute, while extending my life expectancy 5 Days and 12 Hours, by avoiding the use of 1584 nicotine delivery devices that would have cost me $364.67.
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elvisluvrgirl1
elvisluvrgirl1

May 19th, 2006, 7:50 pm #12

Congratulaton on your quit and this post Joseph! It seems no matter where you are in your quit we all have this same question.....and thank you for easing that wonder with humor, afterall laughter is the best medicine
NNi
I have been quit for 1 Week, 5 Days, 2 hours, 50 minutes and 5 seconds (12 days). I have saved $16.35 by not smoking 145 cigarettes. I have saved 12 hours and 5 minutes of my life. My Quit Date: 5/7/2006 5:00 AM
Last edited by elvisluvrgirl1 on December 19th, 2009, 11:19 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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tedd1011
tedd1011

May 19th, 2006, 9:49 pm #13

Great post Joe. I was having a pretty rough morning thinking about exactly that. When will everything be okay????

This really put things in perspective for me. I can get back to work now.

Much appreciated!!!

NTAP!!!!

Cheers,

Ted

tedd1101 - Free and Healing for Four Days, 9 Hours and 6 Minutes, while extending my life expectancy 9 Hours, by avoiding the use of 109 nicotine delivery devices that would have cost me $39.92.
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Aprilangel1951
Aprilangel1951

May 28th, 2006, 10:30 am #14

I have always liked this post and it helped me get through some tough times early in my quit. Now I am happy to say I get it!!! I truely understand the meaning to one day at a time and I am now being rewarded with comfort on most days
Carol
146 days of freedom by taking it one day at a time and NTAP!
Last edited by Aprilangel1951 on December 19th, 2009, 11:21 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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KatieDidIt1999
KatieDidIt1999

June 4th, 2006, 12:18 am #15

As Joseph said above.......and you can't read it too many times
"If you want to wait until tomorrow at 9:00 AM, you may feel a difference or you can decide that right now things are infinitely better than they were when you were still smoking or chewing or however you got your nicotine. They will continue to get better too, as long as you never take another puff."
Kat
5 months
Last edited by KatieDidIt1999 on December 19th, 2009, 11:22 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Sifu Brian1
Sifu Brian1

June 4th, 2006, 12:29 am #16

Brian
I quit smoking 1 Week, 2 Days, 3 hours, 29 minutes and 40 seconds ago. I have saved $34.29 by not smoking 274 cigarettes. I have saved 22 hours and 50 minutes of my life. I quit on 5/25/2006 4:00 PM
Last edited by Sifu Brian1 on December 19th, 2009, 11:23 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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JoeJFree Gold
JoeJFree Gold

June 24th, 2006, 1:57 am #17

The further I get from my last puff, the more precious each day becomes because I never want to experience withdrawl again, not for 3 days nor for the 30 seconds it took me to pull a cigarette from the box in my breast pocket, pack it on my thumb nail and spark it up. Joseph forza d'animo

Comfort? You don't find it, it finds you. Patience, Commitment, Forgiveness...yes those all help. But if you give yourself sufficient time to heal and regain your natural blood chemistry AND believe that life is better lived without the omnipresent influence of an addictive chemical altering your brain chemistry and moods....well you can't stop it, you'll become a comfortable ex-smoker. Just might take a little extra time. Took my Dad about 5 or 6 months to really believe. You could not now convince him (or me for that matter) to ever take another puff. We're free because it is our preffered choice to NTAP!

JoeJ Free for 529 days
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SandyO00
SandyO00

June 27th, 2006, 12:43 am #18

Thank you so much!! I'm sure I will be reading this post many times.

Sandy
Free from nicotine for 6 days, 12 hours
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auntvaleria
auntvaleria

June 28th, 2006, 12:37 pm #19

I needed this! Thanks!
aunt valeria
I have been quit for 4 Months, 4 Days, 4 hours, 7 minutes and 59 seconds (124 days). I have saved $341.46 by not smoking 2,483 cigarettes. I have saved 1 Week, 1 Day, 14 hours and 55 minutes of my life. My Quit Date: 2/23/2006 7:30 PM
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KatieDidIt1999
KatieDidIt1999

August 10th, 2006, 7:41 am #20


ntap is the only requirement. Humor and knowledge just make it better This one is priceless...thanks Joseph.
Kat
7 months and a few days free
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Sojournerxl1
Sojournerxl1

October 15th, 2006, 9:00 pm #21

absolutely...to everything you said in this post.

DrD

175 days and not counting
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KatieDidIt1999
KatieDidIt1999

May 15th, 2007, 9:28 am #22

This one plants a smile when you most need it.
Kat
31 years actively addicted
1 year, 4 months free
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thinkwild
thinkwild

May 17th, 2007, 1:02 am #23

No need to worry when, just know that it will come. NTAP

I have been quit for 366 days
I have saved $4,397.00 by not smoking 10,992 cigarettes.
I have saved 1 Month, 1 Week and 4 hours of my life.
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Jacqui672 Gold
Jacqui672 Gold

May 26th, 2007, 1:26 am #24

To anyone reading this in need of comfort, hang on, I swear on my life it will come. I didn't believe it. I was struggling at 4 months, 6 months, 9 months. Folks that quit around the same time as me here were always posting happy thoughts.

I was miserable. Crying all the time, wondering what was wrong with me? Nothing was. It just wasn't my time to feel comfort yet. I define comfort as getting through a day not once thinking about smoking. Living as if I never smoked.

Last night, my hubby, ( a chain smoker) accidentily blew smoke right in my face. And it occured to me: I didn't think about smoking. I hadn't all day. Or the day before for that as a matter of fact. Or the day before, well, you get the point. 20 minutes later I remembered I'd thought about smoking while on vacation in Florida....in March. It is May.

Holy God! My comfort has come. And yours will too as long as you NTAP.

One year, one month, three weeks, six days, 2 hours, 26 minutes and 2 seconds. 16924 cigarettes not smoked, saving $4,654.12. Life saved: 8 weeks, 2 days, 18 hours, 20 minutes.
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JoeJFree Gold
JoeJFree Gold

July 28th, 2007, 5:32 am #25


It can be done. Make the commitment to find the true you.

Comfort can't be grabbed, bought or bargained for.

It arrives when you are ready to accept and live with - not survive in spite of - your addiction dependency relationship.

Accpetance is an embrace. Stay true to you and sooner than you can imagine Comfort and a calmness of mind not felt in a long time will envelop you too.

NTAP

Joe J Free 2 years 6 months 17 days

Al J - an ex-smoker (now living and fighting lung cancer) for 2 years, 1 month, 7 days, 5 hours, 23 minutes and 45 seconds (767 days). Dad has reclaimed 39 days, 23 hours and 1 minute to of precious remaining life time.
  • Despite Dad's recent deadly diagnosis the one thing we've not discussed in the last few weeks was how a tobacco cigarette would ever again have any place in our lives now that we are comfortably free.
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