Triggers: Reminders From Your Executive Assistant

Subconscious use cue extinguishment
Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

22 May 2004, 12:38 #11

Thanks again John for another great post! (And not because you tagged it on the end of one of my ramblings.) I cannot say enough about patience. One of the great things about getting further into my quit is that I seem to be applying to other areas of my life what I have been learning and practising about patience. Time is such a gift to give yourself; it's incredible.

I did not see your post about nicotine before. Very interesting. I suspect then that more consequences will be found about NRT abuse over the next few decades. I noticed you posted a few relevant articles recently. I'm so glad I don't have to worry about it all anymore now that I NTAP.

One more note. This is our first spring long weekend in Canada; my family opens the cottage this weekend for the year. I don't have any full-fledged craves anymore but I had to write a little memo today to myself to no longer worry about packing enough cigarettes for the weekend. Nowadays I laugh at passing thoughts like "pack cigarettes". I don't even stop in my tracks. They are like echoes, just memories. There's no going back.

~ Kay ~
Celebrating 4 Months, 28 Days, 19 Hours and 7 Minutes of Freedom.
Forsaking 3016 doses of poison has liberated $971.10 and 10 Days and 11 Hours of my life.
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Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:58

02 Jun 2004, 11:52 #12

Kay,
Thank you so much for your post. I found it when I was trying to stay busy fighting off an urge. Do other addicts feel this urge to go back, do you think?
Samson 3 weeks, 6 days
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Joined: 19 Dec 2008, 00:33

06 Jun 2004, 22:21 #13


very nice. It is good to come back and see these posts. I havnt been posting latly and it is not because I no longer feel the urge. I feel a powerfull pull towards a cig. I know it is wrong and it can kill me, but I still want the feeling back. Alas and alack that love was not meant to be.

Ace
Ace - Has been breathing fresh air for Four Months, Three Days, 11 Hours and 22 Minutes, while extending the time with my family for 11 Days and 7 Hours, and not even missing the 3262 little, smelly, stinking devices that would have cost me $459.09.
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Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:58

13 Sep 2004, 21:05 #14

Kay, I ***LOVE*** this post! I was chuckling away as I read it as it explains with 100% accuracy exactly what is going on inside my head. I love the imagery, my EA is in there with all those internal memos, effieciently filed away. Good God! If you could work out the indexing system he uses, you'd be a millionaire!

Peter - Free and Healing for Nine Days, 1 Hour and 4 Minutes, while extending my life expectancy 15 Hours, by avoiding the use of 181 cigarettes that would have cost me £43.43.
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Joined: 07 Jan 2009, 19:36

12 Nov 2004, 02:17 #15

Thanks!!! That's a huge help. I'm at 17 days and learning the "brain" part of it makes a big difference. I don't feel like i'm going quite so crazy.
Thanks,
Roohster
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Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:58

12 Nov 2004, 03:21 #16

What can I say that has not already been said? Great perspective prividing yet another slant on the war against addiction. Great Post!!!!!!
Kevin, NicFree & Luv'n It for 4 Months, 3 Weeks, 4 Days, 4 hours, 8 minutes and 21 seconds. I quit chewing tobacco on 6/17/04, have not spent $735.86 on copenhagen.
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Joined: 19 Dec 2008, 01:42

12 Nov 2004, 09:05 #17

Kay, this is outstanding. Once I find out how I can mark something as my favourite post, this has got to be it.
I frequently experince "never-smokers" who have this "wasn't that yesterday?" attitude towards my quit. This really addresses all my current issues and growth.
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Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:58

23 Jan 2005, 05:36 #18

Lol...I have to admit, "Executive Assistant" sounds a lot better than "Junkie Mind". Thanks for bringing this up.

Amy
Free and Healing for Nineteen Days, 10 Hours and 36 Minutes, while extending my life expectancy 2 Days, by avoiding the use of 583 nicotine delivery devices that would have cost me $145.93.
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Joined: 19 Dec 2008, 00:00

15 Feb 2005, 07:16 #19

Thanks, Kay, for this wonderful story. I don't know how often I've read and re-read it ... especially in the first two weeks or so when my Inner Junkie (IJ) was nearly drving me mad. She tried very hard but I'm more than happy to report she didn't succeed.

I was so scared of the psychological side when I started my quit ... only recently dawned on me that this might have been why it was so hard in the very beginning. Talk about self-fulfilling phrophecies and attitudes.

Like all the golden Oldies keep saying: it gets better! It IS getting better.

Having said that ... I blame you that she now sometimes comes out and wants a promotion. What she really wanted was to put my perfectly capable EA out of her job. I'm so glad that my EA seems to have won that particular battle.

Thank you, too, for so many great posts and very belated congratulations on your golding -- the colour suits you so well.

Gitte
81 days and a bit
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Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

21 Feb 2005, 02:23 #20

Well that certainly made me smile. Thanks for the great post. I need to bring my Executive Assistant in and sit him down for a long old talk. He just doen't seem to want to get it. Never take another puff. Needs to become his new Mantra.

Thanks again for making me smile.

Day seven and still trucking on!!! 132 death sticks not smoked. 10hrs and 59 minutes of my life back!!!

Ealine
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Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:58

28 Mar 2005, 22:55 #21

Thanks for bumping this one up! I"ve printed it and review it often. This is one of the articles that gave me hope I could quit and it would'nt be horrible forever. It empowers me to know all I have to do is face certain situations once or twice and I can rewrite how I respond to them.

Thanks again. :)

A.
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Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

22 Sep 2005, 19:42 #22

Printed the lead post out for my Dad who says he is still having regular 'thoughts' about smoking, even after 3 months.
Not all that unusual for somone who has smoked a lifetime!

Thanks for the wisdom & viewpoint Kay.
I'm sure your now famous article will help him with his 'Thiggers'.

yqb - JoeJ Free retraining my 'Assistant' for the last 254 days.
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Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

07 Jan 2006, 05:25 #23

As Kay shares here, we each conditioned our minds to expect nicotine at certain times, places, locations, events or when encountering certain emotions. As I've heard Joel say more than once, when phones were still tied to cords most of us wouldn't pick it up when it rang without first ensuring that we had our nicotine source handy as we didn't know how long we'd be on it.
It may be little things like ice cubes hitting a glass, our little walk, or subtle distinctions like the weekly paper being a single cigarette read while the Sunday paper was always three. Each trigger encountered means an opportunity to reclaim one additional aspect of our life, to obtain another piece of the puzzle. Soon the pieces start fitting together and before long more of the puzzle is complete than missing.
Unless we insist upon keeping a few pieces in our pocket (those lingering romantic dependency fixations) - with each passing day the challenges will grow fewer, shorter and generally less intense. Fully retrain your EA, complete the puzzle and taste the full flavor of a life where wanting for nicotine becomes the exception not the rule.
This can be one of the most interesting adventures in self discovery that we'll ever make if we'll only stop being afraid and allow ourselves to notice and smell the beauty of the slowly opening rosebud that is us.
John (Gold x6)
Last edited by John (Gold) on 14 Apr 2009, 12:50, edited 1 time in total.
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Joined: 19 Dec 2008, 00:59

10 Feb 2006, 02:38 #24

Kattatonic,

Thank you for this wonderful analogy. It came to me not a moment too soon as today is one of the hardest days I've had so far.

I'm going to print it and refer to it whenever I feel my "Assistant" needs a little refresher training.

Tracy - Free and Healing for Eleven Days, 21 Hours and 11 Minutes. I have extended my life by 19 Hours by avoiding the use of 238 cigarettes that would have cost me $87.50.
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Joined: 16 Jan 2003, 08:00

05 Apr 2006, 22:17 #25

Last edited by Sal GOLD.ffn on 29 Mar 2009, 22:45, edited 1 time in total.
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Joined: 19 Dec 2008, 00:35

05 Apr 2006, 23:59 #26

Great post - this scenario must surely remind us all of some trigger that has suddenly sprung into our heads for no apparent reason. What a great site Freedom is!

Lyn

(3 Weeks, 2 Days, 44 minutes and 18 seconds. Quit date: 13/03/2006 16:15).
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Joined: 19 Dec 2008, 01:40

22 Jun 2006, 23:33 #27

I love this!! I'm printing this! I can just imagine the little guy running up behind me or tapping me on the shoulder while finishing a cup of coffee. From now on, I will talk to him and remind him of the new memos and please throw the old memos out.
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Joined: 16 Jan 2003, 08:00

19 Jan 2007, 07:02 #28

A great reply in Roger's Patience:
It is so important to remember that this is a healing process.
It takes time to re-wire the brain.
It takes time to learn to move through our daily lives and routines without relying on a drug.
It takes time to educate ourselves and to gain confidence in our ability to succeed.
For today...make a promise to yourself to give time time.
Be patient with your healing.
Keep reading and learning and trusting us when we say: it will get better!
Parker
Last edited by Sal GOLD.ffn on 14 Apr 2009, 12:51, edited 1 time in total.
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Joined: 19 Dec 2008, 00:41

07 May 2007, 09:02 #29

This is an excellent topic. Whenever I find myself thinking about smoking, I try to go through this analysis in an effort to determine what the trigger is. Just knowing that it is a trigger helps. NTAP
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Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

22 Aug 2007, 14:42 #30

Perfect!
Just what I was needing to read:
"He will get it; I know he will. It will just take a while and a walk through all my various scenarios. He is really very, very good. He learned so well the first time -- I have to give him time to learn the new mandate."

I was doing something tonight that was frustrating me. It triggered an old junkie thought or two (which went away actually pretty fast considering the situation!).
I tend to be impatient and expect thoughts/triggers of smoking to be gone....period...end of subject!

This reading helped me have more understanding
for myself. I owe my executive assistant a little grace, considering he/she is dealing with reconditioning 35 years worth of junkie thinking. I extend my apologies to my executive assistant!.....for having unrealistic expectations of you. You really are doing a fine job! Carry on, I'd wouldn't be Free & Healing without you!!

Lou - Keeping it simple, One day at time & NTAP now ='s
2 Months, 3 days Free and Healing
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Joined: 19 Dec 2008, 00:21

27 Aug 2007, 19:50 #31

That memo, I mean note, is a brilliant, fantastic explanation of what goes on once the 72 hours passes. What a great tool to throw in the mix - Thanks!
E.

I have been quit for 1 Week, 5 Days, 23 hours, 43 minutes and 49 seconds (12 days). I have saved $49.76 by not smoking 207 cigarettes. I have saved 17 hours and 15 minutes of my life. My Quit Date: 8/14/2007 5:11 AM
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Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

29 Aug 2007, 08:17 #32

HA HA HA KATTATONIC!!! LOVE THE EXECUTIVE ASSISTANT BIT!!! Cheers, Suzi

I have been quit for 1 Week, 21 hours, 16 minutes and 42 seconds (7 days). I have saved $31.54 by not smoking 157 cigarettes. I have saved 13 hours and 5 minutes of my life. My Quit Date: 8/20/2007 10:00 PM
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Joined: 19 Dec 2008, 00:26

16 Oct 2007, 05:48 #33

wow, awesome and right on the money. this is so accurate!

One week, six days, 18 hours, 16 minutes and 56 seconds. 275 cigarettes not smoked, saving $72.93. Life saved: 22 hours, 55 minutes.
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Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

07 Nov 2007, 07:26 #34

Here's a great read for some of our newcomers. It was (and still is) one of my favorites regarding triggers.

Kathy - I have been quit for 1 Year, 7 Months, 1 Week, 2 Days, 11 hours, 27 minutes and 12 seconds (588 days). I have saved $2,765.83 by not smoking 23,539 cigarettes. I have saved 2 Months, 2 Weeks, 6 Days, 17 hours and 35 minutes of my life. My Quit Date: 03/28/2006 6:00 AM
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Joined: 19 Dec 2008, 00:19

13 Nov 2007, 13:27 #35

It never fails that I find just what I need here every time I log on! My EA has been sneaking up on me at really strange times, and has actually been hanging around this weekend.

I have discussed the new policy with him, and he says, "Very good, Miss. Would you like a chocolate instead?"

Jenny - Free and Healing for Seventeen Days, 8 Hours and 56 Minutes, while extending my life expectancy 1 Day and 4 Hours, by avoiding the use of 347 nicotine delivery devices that would have cost me $104.31.
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