Reading at other quit smoking sites

soulagement0
Joined: 19 Dec 2008, 00:05

23 May 2008, 21:34 #11

I hope it is not innapropriate to point out (because I may be the poster who "uses" that term), that one of the quitmeters recommended at why quit uses "Smobriety" in the stats formula. Since I am on Mac, that is the only quitmeter available, apparently. So unless I write over it each time I use my stats, they wil always say "Smobriety comes to...". So, in a way, it does not necessarily have any relationship to looking at other stop smoking sites, but can come from using one of the ttols recommended here.
Reply

Joel
Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

23 May 2008, 21:55 #12

Actually, I never knew that about a quit meter. I see it makes sense though for when I do a word search of Freedom it shows that the term "smobriety" has been used at Freedom 248 times, so I suspect a lot of that is from that quit counter. When I do the same word search for "smober" it brings up 5 occurences of its use.
Reply

soulagement0
Joined: 19 Dec 2008, 00:05

23 May 2008, 23:54 #13

And Joel, I forgot to say thank you. A huge, enormous, heart and lung felt thank you. What you have created here is tremendous.
Reply

katsrule8
Joined: 09 Oct 2006, 07:00

24 May 2008, 06:07 #14

From: ImageImageLburgguy1 Sent: 5/24/2008 5:18 AM
I'm sorry but I fail to see the big deal about using the term "smober". I don't want to make a big deal about it but I will say this much: I think it is a logical extension of the words smoke and sober, and even though I have never used it it made sense to me when I saw it and I thought it was novel and cute. I think to infer that the person using it learned it elsewhere is premature.

Joel I love you and this site for literally saving my life. I just think that you risk offending the person who could very well have come up with the term independently and innocently. You risk making that person feel alienated here and vulnerable to a relapse. IMHO. I could be wrong by not seeing the bigger picture.

I think about smoking (or rather I think about smoking fondly) maybe a total of five minutes/day - tops.

John day 77
Reply

Joel
Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

24 May 2008, 06:42 #15

Lburgguy (John) wrote in a different string:
"I'm sorry but I fail to see the big deal about using the term "smober".

Hello John:

This string it what explains the history of the use of the term "smober." It is a term that is used a lot around the Internet by sites dealing with smoking, but not a term that is used much in real world settings. In fact, as a post from a couple of years ago illustrated this point when a new member wrote asking what the term actually meant.

I just looked it up in what I believe is the most common Internet dictionary/encyclopedia and got the following response:

Search results From xxxxx, the free encyclopedia No article title matches
There is no page titled "smober".




Being that it isn't used much in real world settings, and from the look of things not even in popular Internet dictionary/encyclopedias yet, when it is used by a member it probably is still a pretty good indicator that the member does read at other sites.



This in itself is not a problem--we suspect that many of our members participate at other sites and that is fine. We do however want members to know that they need to be careful as to what they bring here to Freedom from other sites, and, equally important, how they must be careful of what they share of information we use at Freedom for much of what we talk about here is not welcome by the management of most other sites.



Our views on pharmaceuticals are not shared by most other sites, and our views on relapse will also stir up debates at other sites. We appreciate the problems that stirring up debates can pose and we really do not want our members doing it with our materials.



So until we start seeing the term used in general media and real world encounters, it is still a pretty good bet that a member using it at our board is reading elsewhere and probably still a good idea to get them to see this thread and understand the implications of bringing materials onto the Freedom site from other locations. The other string that discusses this implication is The Teaching of Conventional Wisdom at Freedom. Here are comments from that thread that tie into this issue:

Conventional Wisdom and Quitting Smoking
We always want to be careful about giving advice that is considered conventional wisdom, sounds great on paper, and is basically wrong for most people trying to quit smoking.

Things like the idea of feeling you have to wait till a certain day of the week, or prepare for a certain time period gives many people the excuse to put off a quit that they may be ready to do at the point in time that they show up. Putting off a quit to the "right time" has caused many a smoker to put it off till death.

Some people advise people to sleep through the quitting process. Sleeping as much as you can teaches a smoker in the midst of a quit how to be a prisoner in bed as opposed to how to start to live life as soon as he or she can. Some people, if totally exhausted or sleepy from the withdrawals may need the sleep, but they are not the majority. If a person is tired and needs sleep, staying in bed is fine--but if they are doing it as an escape, they are slowing up their psychological adjustments more than helping them. There are plenty of other such tidbits of wisdom out there, such as carry cigarettes to show how strong you are or give up coffee or change all of your daily routines that have many advocates but is still not necessarily right for the majority of people.

We have a Quit Smoking Tip Sheet that gives a few tried and true techniques, not all inclusive by any means, but a starting point. Keep in mind, this list in controversial in most places, especially when considering the first line reads "Quit cold turkey. In the long run it's the easiest and most effective technique of smoking cessation." Controversial elsewhere or not, it is key to note that this concept and a few others are the reasons that our members joined up at Freedom and have stayed here.

Most people are here because they like the focus we put on our simplicity to quitting. I think many if not most have been to other sites and realized that idea of anything that works for you is fine just didn't seem to work for them. If you think other sites have an edge, go and read at them for a few days. Read carefully what is often going on. You will often see numerous relapses that are down played as not being big mistakes, and you will also likely see people who are complaining a lot more of physical and emotional problems much longer than the average participant here at Freedom. We are trying to help people get adjusted both mentally and physically the fastest they can to life as an ex-smoker.

We want to caution our newest members to read here and learn as much as you can and not to be so quick to throw in quitting advice that you have picked up elsewhere--either at other sites or in your real world encounters. We want people to come to Freedom to first learn how to quit before they shift their attentions on how to teach people to quit. Although in truth, the real reason people should be here should always be to enforce his or her own personal quit even more than influencing others--each and every members quit and life depends on this goal. Any advice that is telling people that they must somehow shift their way of life in order to start or sustain a quit may not be accurate for most people.

The bottom line of quitting is, the sooner people realize that everything they could do as a smoker they can now do as an ex-smoker--the sooner they realize that there is life without smoking. They will also find out there may be many things that they can now do better without smoking and that life is basically better on many fronts from them having quit smoking. The faster people get back to their life--the sooner they will break triggers and habits and the sooner they will realize that they can do anything as an ex-smoker as long as they always remember to never take another puff!

Joel

and

Every now and then I see a post that has the line line, "I've heard that...," or "I've seen somewhere...", or "I've read at another site...," or even "My doctor says...,"and then goes on to tell of some of conventional wisdom or folk tale for all to read and maybe get the impression that there is some validity to the specific quitting advice claim. This kind of post is likely standard fare at many other Internet Support Sites but we are not set up to be a standard Internet Support Site. We are set up to be an educational forum that also happens to offer support. We really make a concerted effort at Freedom to make sure that all of the concepts presented have some real value and validity.

It is one thing for a person to write that they have heard or read something and want to know if it is valid, but to just write out the comment as advice or as a fact because they have heard it that it must be true can pose a problem. This string talks about how important it is for people who post here to be cautious on what they pass out as advice that is picked up elsewhere.

I'm not saying that there isn't some good advice out there, but it is best to clear ideas though our managers first before putting it out as some sort of factual statement. At a minimum, if you heard something elsewhere that you may think is of value, post the idea as a question so as to make it clear that you are just trying to do some fact finding and not trying to give the impression that you are stating a known and valid fact that may impact people reading here at Freedom.





I hope this answers your concerns. If you have further concerns feel free to write me or to [url=mailto:managers@whyquit.com]managers@whyquit.com[/url].

Joel
Last edited by Joel on 27 May 2010, 11:06, edited 1 time in total.
Reply

soulagement0
Joined: 19 Dec 2008, 00:05

24 May 2008, 18:02 #16

As per reading on other sites... I admit, there have been a couple of times when I have strayed, just to see what else is out there - in particular to see what exists in the country where I live and in that language.

But I have found no other website devoted uniquely to cold-turkey quitting, where the focus is so purely kept. That is why I really respect the strongly enforced limits held up here. No chat, no diverging, no fluff, no squabbling, no "trolls", just 100% no nonsense get-over-the-nicotine and on with your life aid and education.

Every other site I have checked out (and I have spent very little time doing so and belong to no other such forum) has relapsers getting encouragement to "brush off your knees, re-patch, get back on the gum, it's not so bad, everybody slips now and again...", and then "What's better, this Chantix or another expensive big pharma drug? Patch, gum, lozenges?" Aaaargh!

There is precious, precious little education about nicotine addiction - and much less the Law of Addiction. WIthout that, in my humble opinion, it is useless to try quitting for the long term.

It makes me mad and frustrated to see how nicotine addiction is treated by and large, because I now know there is only one cure, and it is 100% free for the taking: NTAP.

So I cannot imagine any devotee of Why Quit finding anything other than frustration, nonsense and plain old bad advice anywhere else. Plus a lot of chit chat that has nothing to do with quitting smoking ("Whose going to win the world cup and who are you going to vote for and....").

We're all here for one purpose only - to understand and get over an addiction and get on with the rest of our lives!

NTAP!!!!

Smobriety comes to: 0Y 1M 2W 2D 19H 50Mns €-Saved to date: €260.19 - 962 chemical and nicotine laden smokes happily not consumed!!!!
Reply

Abu Daud1
Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

24 May 2008, 22:25 #17

I came across whyquit.com from another forum after feeling that there has GOT to be something else out there where the people are more serious. I was searching for something more serious and I'm grateful I came across Freedom. I consider myself truly blessed to have come across whyquit.com, and after reading, reading, and more readin...along with the wonderful videos posted by Joel, and did I mention reading? It became crystal clear that I had arrived at the right place where people had the same mindset as myself. It was a HUGE relief reading Joel's material as it cleared the air once and for all, explained things very clearly and rationaly, and made it possible to move forward towards recovery...but with one VERY big difference...this time I was educated and I actually had some sort of idea of what was going on, what to expect, why to expect it ect. I check in on the other forum from time to time and I am amazed at some of the so called "advice" that people are giveing. I don't post directly in order not to start any problems, but I have sent a private message to a few people with a link to articles that I thought might help explain what they were going through and why. Of course the articles are from the wonderful library available here.

By the way, I'm new and this is my first post, but I just want to say that I am truly thankful to be part of such a special group. Thanks to Joel and everyone else responsible for this forum and this website. I feel that, for me anyway, it is the main ingedient that has been missing is previous attempts and that having it for this quit has and continues to make all the difference.
Reply

Lburgguy1
Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

24 May 2008, 22:52 #18

I guess I was blessed, or lucky, to have only found this site.

The tough-love and no nonsense approach is what is needed to quit this nasty addiction.

If this site had even hinted that there was any other solution other than NTAP, I would have tried that route.... and I would have failed at my quit.

Thanks to Joel and the many others behind the scenes keeping this site up.

John day 78
Reply

hwc5
Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

06 Oct 2008, 13:31 #19

My favorite comment at other sites is:

"Oh yeah, product XYZ is such a blessing. It really works. I couldn't have done it without product XYZ. It's helped me quit four times. "

So, silly me, I'm thinking...wait a minute if something really is that great at helping you quit, you should only need to do it once!

I guess I'm just too simple-minded to get it.
Reply

FreedomNicotine
Joined: 06 Dec 2008, 16:58

01 Jan 2010, 22:13 #20

Being that it is New Years there are likely a higher number of people considering quitting now and exploring sites around the Internet. This thread here clearly defines how we have different views and operate very differently from other sites out there, and explains why. There are people here who may very well be using other sites while being members here or just reading here, which is fine. This thread though helps these members and readers understand discrepencies that they may see in what people experience at other sites compared to the experiences that most of our posting members seem to describe:

We have a thread called "Tell a newbie how how many seconds a day you still want a cigarette"

This thread gives a little perspective on that string. People who have been elsewhere may very well think that the responses in this string don't seem normal, that there must be something unique about our quitters. The only thing unique by our design is the only people who can respond to this question are people actually totally off of nicotine--most for some pretty significant time periods. As it says above...

This is an extremely important string. If you go back and read through the hundreds of responses from people who are off for weeks, months, or even years and you will get a real appreciation of just how infrequent smoking thoughts really are for people who totally break free from nicotine. If you were to pose the exact same question at other sites that have the limitations of variable interpretations of what it means to be truly quit you would likely see many different answers and a wide variety of responses to this very same question.

The problem of defining what is really being quit can even pose problems to people who are not using any form of NRT or had any "slips" (relapses), for by reading the comments of other people who are "off smoking" for days, weeks, months or years and who are still complaining of this symptom and that craving can set up the expectation that quitting is really a long drawn out battle. This sets the stage for either a self-fulfilling prophecy situation or for easily blaming everything that goes wrong in an ex-smoker's life on the fact that he or she had quit smoking.

If you are you feeling stressed on a particular day weeks into your quit or having a specific physical symptom-it must be because you quit smoking. After all, look at those other people who are feeling stressed or having the same physical symptom the same day who have been off for just as long. We on the other hand try to insure that our readers recognize that if they are feeling stress or are having a physical symptom it is probably because they are just facing one or more stressful situations or are having symptoms to a problem that they had better find the real underlying reason for the cause. The string Life goes on without smoking explores this issue.

Other sites often lack a very thorough educational component helping people to understand important concepts inspiring people to quit or reinforcing their resolve to stay off. We have four major components built into the sites of www.whyquit.com and Freedom. We try to give our readers the understanding of why they smoke, why they should stop, how to stop, and most importantly, how to stay free from not only smoking but from the control of nicotine. The combination of having all of this information and being truly nicotine free gives our readers a real edge in sustaining their quits and of helping them to have a healthier and happier outlook on their life as a non-smoker. We help them to develop a more positive attitude and this will often minimize the emotional adjustment period people can experience when quitting. We also help them to see early on that they are not depriving themselves of a cigarette as opposed to ridding themselves of smoking. We in essence help to speed up the emotional recovery process for many of our readers.

I sometimes worry about our members participating at other sites for the conventional wisdom advice and different philosophies taught can sometimes sidetrack them in their progress. In a way though I think it can also be helpful for some to read at other sites too as long as they read at these sites with an educated and critical eye. Our members will often see people having an extended hard time and may very well be able to recognize just why these other people are in a perpetual emotional or physical withdrawal state and end up feeling more grateful and protective of their own quits. Our members will also see relapses on a regular basis and realize just how important it is to do everything in their power to make this quit stick.

By the way, we have guidelines as to how to behave as a Freedom member when at other sites. I am going to copy comments we have in Our Mission Statement string that talks about how we don't want our members stirring up debates at other sites with our materials and philosophies. What we are doing here at Freedom is controversial and we do not believe in stirring up controversies at other sites.

Also I am going to attach a few other links here that I think would be good for people who participate at other sites to read. Again, if you do read at other sites work at developing a critical eye and recognize what you are reading may not be what the person is writing. You may be reading "nicotine free," when the writer was saying "smoke free" or even "smoke free except for that one puff here and there that didn't really count."

Again, read these additional links below, They will help to prepare you to read anywhere and to recognize the real advantage you have in understanding just why you quit and why you are still totally convinced that you want to stick to your personal commitment to never take another puff.

Joel

Forgot to attach these links earlier:
Threads that shows how we are different than other sites and other professional programs:

I Liked My Other Support Group More

The Teaching of Conventional Wisdom at Freedom

Good news, our members don't relapse anymore...

Do members of our board seem to be too happy? Misery Love Company

Quitting can be a very lonely experience

NRT and Quit Meters

Limitations with the use of NRT products
Reply