Quitting can be a very lonely experience

Maurice
Joined: 16 Oct 2010, 19:53

17 Oct 2010, 20:43 #31

Lonely for me too! I have people not believing that I actually have quit, who are continually asking me if I am back smoking. Seems to be the reverse of supporting me, in my quit. It's like they expect me to fail.

The articles and posts here, counterbalance a lot of that lonely/isolation stuff, I guess each of us, quietly endure to varying degrees.

mo
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Joel Spitzer
Joined: 13 Nov 2008, 14:04

17 Oct 2010, 21:00 #32

Here is another string addressing this issue: 


[font=ARIAL, GEORGIA, 'TIMES NEW ROMAN', TIMES, SERIF]When did people start to take your quit seriously?[/font][font=ARIAL, GEORGIA, 'TIMES NEW ROMAN', TIMES, SERIF] [/font]
[font=ARIAL, GEORGIA, 'TIMES NEW ROMAN', TIMES, SERIF]
[/font]
[font=ARIAL, GEORGIA, 'TIMES NEW ROMAN', TIMES, SERIF]Another side concept also in that string:[/font]
[font=ARIAL, GEORGIA, 'TIMES NEW ROMAN', TIMES, SERIF]
[/font]
[font=ARIAL, GEORGIA, 'TIMES NEW ROMAN', TIMES, SERIF]I saw where a couple of members have made a point of saying that this quit is for them so that others taking the quit serious is not important. They are right in this assessment, whether other people take your quit serious or not is not important to your success. What is important is that you take it serious. 

But there is one side benefit to quitting that this issue does touch upon. There are smokers around you, possibly family members or friends who still think that quitting is impossible. They may feel that when a person who smoked like just them tries to quit, that they will eventually fail because that is just the way it is supposed to be. 

Your quit just may help in shaking up this illusion that they have. When a smoker starts to realize that you did quit and also recognize that you are intent on staying off, it may very well stir something inside of him or her that maybe there is hope for him or her too. Even non-smokers around you may be using you as an example to help another smoker they know. 

So yes, your quit is for you and you are the primary benefactor of the benefits. But don't be surprised if just maybe one day someone else close to you quits and tells you that your success helped influenced him or her. That person too then will be the primary benefactor of his or her quit, and both of you will be able to be shining examples for others of how staying smoke free is as simple as staying committed to never take another puff! 

Joel
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Last edited by Joel Spitzer on 17 Oct 2010, 21:02, edited 1 time in total.
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Maurice
Joined: 16 Oct 2010, 19:53

17 Oct 2010, 21:28 #33

@ Joel:

From your first post in this thread:

[font=ARIAL,GEORGIA,'TIMES NEW ROMAN',TIMES,SERIF] When did people start to take your quit seriously?[/font][font=ARIAL,GEORGIA,'TIMES NEW ROMAN',TIMES,SERIF]   

"
[/font] I suspect a lot of newer members are encountering great skepticism as to the odds of you actually quitting from family members and friends".

I guess, after the many years of my smoking and failed previous attempts, has given the people closest to me, the right to be a little skeptical.

Good point you made earlier. It is only important that I am serious in my remaining quit. Also, who knows how many of those who are still smoking, are secretly (or not so secretly, by their questions), are watching how I am doing, to learn for themselves, how it might be for them to quit.

Thanks!
mo
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Johnnie
Joined: 17 Aug 2010, 16:35

20 Oct 2010, 16:13 #34

Something I've never been aware of before, the chance to be a good example.  Actually, I was inspired many years ago by a favorite folk singer who'd kicked both booze and smoking, cold turkey for each.  I managed to quit drinking, but of course did less well with the smoking...till now.  Now, yes now, of the double fists of that famous singer.  And, aside from my natural selfish concerns, I hope to be a good example of the power to quit both.  Whatever pains he went through, the singer never made anything of it.  All he said, basically, was that quitting was something he needed to do.  And that he took care of business.  Along those lines, I keep my trials and tribulations to my posts on site here.  Whenever anyone outside asks, I keep my replies simple and upbeat:  if I can do it, so can you and there's a website you might want to visit...
Gratefully Gold

I escaped from the prison of smoking on August 14, 2010.  
[font]The best revenge is quitting well![/font] 
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Guest
Posts 0
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03 Feb 2011, 15:37 #35

Wow! - thanks Joel!  so much stuff on this website that helps.  My husband and I both quit on January 15th, 2011.  I quit cold turkey with support from whyquit.com.  My husband got laser therapy - he thinks I'm foolish to do this "on my own".  I will not sabotage our recoveries but I know I'm not alone like he thinks.Hey - success is all that matters!!
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JulieS
Joined: 20 Sep 2011, 18:36

22 Sep 2011, 18:37 #36

This was so helpful!  Thank you.  I am feeling pretty alone.
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