Quit Expectations - Start with Baby Steps!

Quit Expectations - Start with Baby Steps!

John (Gold)
Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

25 Feb 2002, 02:39 #1

Quit Expectations Skills - Baby Steps
Are you just beginning a new quit? What do you currently expect of yourself? Do you truly believe that you will NEVER EVER smoke another cigarette for the REMAINDER of your life? It's a bit hard to believe, isn't it! Then why begin your journey by imposing such distant, remote or unrealistic expectations? Try this instead. Do you truly believe that you have the ability to not smoke for the next HOUR? Of course you can! We all can!

If we are being honest and realistic with ourselves then why would we force our mind to accept the concept or goal of quitting FOREVER when today it seems unrealistic? Why not instead develop an outlook that focuses entirely on remaining successful here and now, by engaging in what we each know that we are 100% capable of doing - quitting for the next 60 minutes! In fact, if our definition of success at quitting is in staying quit FOREVER, instead of here and now, the only time we will ever feel that we've achieved victory and entitled to celebrate is after we've died as an ex-smoker. What good would that do us? Why not celebrate each hour and each day as its own victory!

Here at Freedom you'll hear our members refer to this important quit expectations skill as "baby steps," "One Day at a Time," or simply as patience! New babies don't start out by attempting to run or even believing it possible! We each crawled and gradually over time our confidence grew. It's the same with quitting. To begin, we should each be content with crawling just one hour at a time! If you focus on remaining successful for the next 60 minutes, it won't be long until the hours will have built themselves into an entire day of healing!

Most of the anxiety associated with quitting is self-induced. An initial unrealistic goal of quitting FOREVER (like trying to force a new born baby to run immediately upon birth) can be extremely discouraging and act as anxiety fuel that seems only to magnify the intensity of a crave that would have ended within three minutes anyway. Learn to crawl first! There will be plenty of time later for walking and then running!

Picture yourself as a mountain climber engaged in a steep 72 hour climb to the top. Like the new born crawling babe, the entire climb will be on all fours. Would it benefit the climber to allow their mind to constantly remain filled with thoughts about how much further remains to be climbed or would that only create unnecessary anxieties? Would it benefit the climber to allow their mind to constantly dwell upon the thought of how far they would fall if they lost their grip, or would that only create unnecessary anxieties?

Baby steps is an expectations skill that allows quitters to concentrate on remaining successful here and now by doing what they already know they can do - baby steps! It encourages all engaged in climbing withdrawal's mountain to focus upon getting a solid grip on the rocks (one hour at a time) beneath their hands, knees and feet. It's a mental tool and skill that allows all new quitters to successfully navigate this temporary period called quitting, so that the can begin feeling the comfort and calmness beyond! No nicotine here and now! Give your confidence a chance to build! Baby steps! YQB John : )
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arravee(BRONZE)
Joined: 07 Jan 2009, 18:57

25 Feb 2002, 15:35 #2

John,

A great string for the newbies to start..(now I am getting the feeling I am no more a newbieImage)!!..

My baby boy (now 11 months old) was crawling on all four when I started my quit on Jan 12 th from Jan last week he started getting up by Holding on to things..started to hold and walk ..and yesterday he walked the first few steps by himself!!

When I watch him i really feel excited! here I am too taking baby steps!!

Ravi

One month, one week, six days, 15 hours, 34 minutes and 53 seconds. 892 cigarettes not smoked, saving S$308.08. Life saved: 3 days, 2 hours, 20 minutes.
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John (Gold)
Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

27 Feb 2002, 06:10 #3

Congratulations Ravi! His very first steps and in clean air too! You can't beat that! Congratulations on both of you as you walk together! My mom smoked throughout my childhood, Ravi, and although it was not her fault that I started, it sure did make it easier. I loved her more than anything and whether she knew it or not, she was always my role model! I pray that you get to spend more years with your son than my mom was able to spend with me! Congratulations again! Just one day at a time Ravi! This is doable! YQB John : )
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Lori225 (Silver)
Joined: 07 Jan 2009, 18:57

06 Mar 2002, 01:32 #4

John. Great advice. Changes that mountain into a very small hill!! I smoked for 28 years and I've decided that I want to be around for my children and my childrens children. My girls are 11 and 7 and I don't want them to follow in my footsteps! I was 13 when I started - and it embarreses me to even admit it. I only I hope that it's not too late to be a positive role model for my daughters.



Lori

I have chosen not to smoke for 1 Week 1 Day 58 Seconds. Cigarettes not smoked: 80. Money saved: $14.00.
Time/Life Saved 13 Hrs 20 Mins 4 Secs
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John (Gold)
Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

08 Mar 2002, 00:07 #5

Lori, not only will you be a positive role model for your daughters, you'll be an educated role model too! I'm sure you'll share a few extremely valuable lessons along the way. I have two daughters as well, now 20 and 22, and they both grew up witnessing just how difficult it was for their father to try and break free. I'm still not sure why, but I never once hid behind any lies or junkie thinking that gave them the impression that smoking made any kind of positive contribution toward my life - there was none and somehow they both knew it! It may be that I was trying to protect them from a force that I could never seem to defeat.

Education is power Lori and it's never too late to teach our children the true power of nicotine! Congratulations on a wonderful beginning to your new life! Motherhood is much more clean, healthy and free with Lori in charge of her addiction! No nicotine, just one day at a time! You're doing great! YQB John
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Alice
Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:59

08 Mar 2002, 07:23 #6

BABY STEPS
After all, we (most of us) have been smoking years and years and years. When we finally put our cigarettes down, we're just going to have to expect some difficulty. There's no other choice. And that's what its all about. Choices. But if we take it
ONE DAY AT A TIME (it gets better and it's not always neat and tidy these darn quits...they have a mind of their own)
and worry about next week next week.................it can be done. WE can do it! You can do it. I'm doing it. Yeah.
YQS
AliceImage
Bronze Plus
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Cathie (Green)
Joined: 07 Jan 2009, 18:57

07 Apr 2002, 00:46 #7

Good advice!

When I have tried to quit in the past I kept telling myself that it was just too overwhelming to think of quitting for the rest of my life and therefore it was not worth my while to quit now.

Freedom has taught me to take quitting in baby steps so that it does not seem overwhelming.

I have been free now for 5 days 11 hours and 44 minutes and proud of it!

Catatonic
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John (Gold)
Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

27 May 2002, 09:18 #8

Don't kid yourself into believing that you'lll ever be stronger than nicotine. None of us are! It doesn't require strength to break free and stay free. It requires desire, patience and understanding! Years of feeding your chemical dependency upon nicotine, and sensing relief from sagging blood serum nicotine levels within 8 to 10 seconds of that very first puff, has bred a tremendous sense of impatience when it comes to complying with your mind's commands to obtain more nicotine. The first step toward building a sense of patience when it comes to breaking free is in understanding the source of our impatience! It isn't all that hard Image
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Joanne Gold
Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:58

06 Jun 2002, 01:41 #9

If you are just starting out and wondering if you can hold on to this quit forever.... STOP! All you have to do is get through the rest of the day without taking that first puff. Each day free from the grips of a powerful addiction, is a victory. Day by day the healing process takes shape, recovery symptoms fade and comfort does come.Image

Hold on tight! Your life worth is any temporary challenges.Image

Just for today...not one puff...no matter what!Image
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Juanjuanjuanjuanjuan200
Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:58

12 Jul 2002, 09:39 #10

I am a real witness of the truth expressed in this simple phrase. Today I visited two clients, old friends that I hadn´t seen for a while. We use to smoke together. They work on the same company on different desks, rooms or offices. I felt the personal crave ( Is the one I am finding all over: people that used to smoke with you, always trigger a crave, they even offer one), I promised myself: I am not going to smoke while I am with this guy. Then again, with the other one: I am not going to smoke with this one either. I worked. Baby steps less than an hour, I survived my visit, open a deal, no puff at all.

Remember Never take another puff

Juan
4w3d23h
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