People Who "Get" to Smoke

Eric Gold
Eric Gold

April 3rd, 2007, 2:54 am #1

Everyone who quits smoking will be faced with a situation at one time or another where there they may get strong urges to smoke and may feel deprived, because they no longer "get" to smoke.

A fellow quitter brought up such a scenario that she was concerned about.

For years, about once a year, her and her friends get together for a weekend holiday and catch up with each other. They all still smoke and this worried her, not only because she was now the only non smoker and this was her first time meeting up with them as a non smoker, but also the fact that she had junkie thoughts that were already surfacing and she was feeling a bit deprived.

What new quitters need to be aware of in situations like this, is that they may be dealing with nostalgia. Being with their friends and having a good time, thoughts of smoking may come up. It is these situations that can create the illusion that smoking was pleasurable.


If these thoughts do arise, it is important to remember that their friends HAVE to smoke. They don't GET to smoke.

When a new quitter is in a situation such as this when they are with all their friends who are smoking and everyone is having a good time laughing and drinking . This can sometimes make the quitter miss smoking and feeling a bit deprived, because their friends still "get" to smoke.

This is an illusion and the truth is, the quitters friend's are having a merry time laughing it up and enjoying themselves DESPITE smoking, not because of it.

All of those smokers are just trying to keep themselves comfortable. They are only trying to keep themselves calm and the only way they can do it, is to smoke a cigarette. That calmness is only temporary. The ex smoker on the other hand is constantly feeling that calmness that the smokers are trying to maintain. Even if they are still re adjusting to life as a non smoker.

Smoking is not a pleasure.It is a burden! While the quitter might occasionally think of smoking and maybe envy their friends in situations like this. It is a moment and moments pass. It is really the smokers who probably constantly envy's the quitter and wish they could do the same, by relieving themselves of this nasty addiction.

Your friends don't have a choice, you do. While in situations like this. It might feel like you don't "GET" to smoke, understand thought, that you do. You can smoke anytime you desire, but the beautiful truth is, you are making a choice not too. That is empowering, for the ex smoker has complete control over this decision to smoke or not.

Unfortunately, the smoking friends do not have this gift to choose. They do not have the luxory to smoke or not. Unless they want to feel withdrawal and anxiety, they must continue to smoke to feel what ex smokers already feel...Calmness.

This is such a cruel trick. Don't fall for it anymore.


I just came back from Japan a while ago and was watching smokers as I was waiting for my ride.

I'll tell you what. If you ever think of smoking, go to the airport and watch smokers. Nothing will break the illusion of smoking faster than watching people smoke before they go to catch their plane.

Watch them stand outside cold, bundled up trying to keep warm in winter weather. Watch them concentrate smoking that cigarette. Watch them as they take their last drag before they put it out. Really watch them and you will see their hesitation as they take that last drag. You can allmost see them thinking to themselves. Do they try to get one more drag out of the cigarette or do they put it out in the ashtray. Sometimes you will actually see the hesitation as they allmost put it out then reconsider and take that last drag off their cigarette.

If you really watch them as they put that cigarette out. You can allmost see the fear in their eyes. You can see the contemplation of deciding should they go catch the plane or do they have just enough time to **** down one more cigarette before they go on a plane where they will not be able to smoke for probably hours.

When you really watch them this way, you can really see that smokers don't GET to smoke. They HAVE to smoke.

Smoking is a none issue in my life anymore, but it's scenes like that where I remember smoking and am so thankful that I no longer HAVE to do that.


Eric


I have been quit for 2 Years, 8 Months, 3 Weeks, 5 Da, 11 hours, 51 minutes and 22 seconds (999 da). I have saved $9,994.93 bnot smoking 39,979 cigarettes. I have saved 4 Months, 2 Weeks, 1 Da 19 hours and 35 minutes of mlife. MQuit Date: 7/7/2004 12:00 AM
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Gump19690
Gump19690

April 3rd, 2007, 3:36 am #2

I always hated airports...they are a smokers nightmare. I've been in that situation more than once and its no fun, chain smoking outside the door before the clock starts ticking between destinations. I've even gone as far as going through security twice, risking missing my plane to get my fix.

Its amazing how a smoker thinks they are enjoying that last one outside the airport, but with just a little bit of education the scene looks completey different.

As for meeting with new friends...I am coming upon a similar situation and am looking forward to leading the way and showing others it can be done. Actions speak louder than words.

Nice post!
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ScottA0
ScottA0

April 3rd, 2007, 3:50 am #3

Thanks for the reminders Eric, I have not been on a plane since I quit , but I will be looking the next time I am.
Gump I was one of the Morons that actually missed my flight because me and my buddy went out to grab "one more" before our flight took off. We had the nerve to give the poor flight girl grief because she would'nt let us on the plane. Thankfully we were able to catch our connecting flight. Shows me how important that fix was. Never again NTAP

Scott
I have been quit for 3 Weeks, 5 Days, 16 hours, 4 minutes and 49 seconds (26 days). I have saved $158.68 by not smoking 933 death sticks. I have saved 3 Days, 5 hours and 45 minutes of my life. My Quit Date: 3/6/2007 11:45 PM
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DynamicAsh1
DynamicAsh1

April 3rd, 2007, 4:33 am #4

Thank You Eric for the great perspective. Smokers don't" get "to smoke, They HAVE to smoke. What an awful way to live.


Mary, free and healing for 1 month, 24 days, 18 hours, 32 minutes and 35 seconds (55 days).

I've not smoked 1115 death sticks, and saved $237.58.
I've saved 3 days, 20 hours and 57 minutes of my life.
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RachaelRebecca
RachaelRebecca

April 3rd, 2007, 5:00 am #5

Wow! That is a great analysis of the airport smoking. My poor husband never smoked and he put up with all the times I had to go find someplace to smoke. I think he just grew tired of fighting me. We all know that a spouse can't make you quit...The threat of DEATH doesn't make us quit so why would we listen to anyone??? Knowledge is power and I think it is the reason most of us have been able to stay QUIT...from the knowledge we have learned here.

I love this post!!!
Rachael - Free and Healing for Eight Days and 3 Hours, while extending my life expectancy 10 Hours, by avoiding the use of 122 nicotine delivery devices that would have cost me $27.43.
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Kim730
Kim730

April 3rd, 2007, 11:51 am #6

Thanks for this post! I've been having some crazy junky thoughts hanging out with all my smoking friends lately, but this put it all back into perspective again!

Kim
Free and Healing for 3 Months, 23 hours, 50 minutes and 36 seconds (90 days). I have saved $407.64 by not smoking 1,819 cigarettes. I have saved 6 Days, 7 hours and 35 minutes of my life.
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Just Hannes
Just Hannes

April 4th, 2007, 2:36 am #7

This is the perfect description of the AAAHHHH while inhaling smoke.

This AAAHHHH doesn't exist like you state here:

'Unless they want to feel withdrawal and anxiety, they must continue to smoke to feel what ex smokers already feel...Calmness.'

We ex-smokers and non-smokers are living in the contstant state of AAAHHHH which a smoker chases by smoking.

Great post Eric. Did you by the way have a good look at people during the flight?
How smokers suffer by the minute more and how hard they run outside after the flight?

Frits (116 days)
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LindaQuit1
LindaQuit1

April 4th, 2007, 7:56 pm #8

Being 6 weeks into my quit, my mind still trys to convince me that having a puff would solve all my problems.I must say my addictive mind has cut back from a full time position to part time.
Being in a position that is out of the ordinary is difficult. Last weekend I went to a party,~ the first one since I quit trying to kill myself smoking. The smokers would all go outside to the bomfire to smoke. As the evening went on, more and more people ended up outside around the fire.At first I was actually stareing at the smokers, I'd remember "when", ~my addictive mind was in overdrive. At that point I started to carry on a conversation with myself. No, I'm not crazy (well maybe a little).I got my addictive brain to take a back seat and my "I am never going to smoke again" brain came thru with amazing control. I was now again looking at all the smokers having their fix. But, this time I was not "remembering when", I was not needing a cig, I was not thinking of how good a couple puffs would be.I was pitying those people, I was thinking how it stinks, I was thinking that if I was getting cold outside I could go in and not have to worry about going back out to smoke. I was in control, not my habit controlling me. I felt great!!!
That evening as we were driving home I realized how my clothes smelled like smoke. Most likely from the fire, perhaps some of the people smoking around me. It was disgusting. To think I walked around for 35 years smelling like smoke. I wonder why friends never told me I stunk! Most likely because a good many of them smelled the same way.
I have taken back control of my life its GREAT!!!
Linda
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johnnynonic
johnnynonic

September 21st, 2008, 2:13 am #9

I'll tell you what. If you ever think of smoking, go to the airport and watch smokers. Nothing will break the illusion of smoking faster than watching people smoke before they go to catch their plane.

Watch them stand outside cold, bundled up trying to keep warm in winter weather. Watch them concentrate smoking that cigarette. Watch them as they take their last drag before they put it out. Really watch them and you will see their hesitation as they take that last drag. You can allmost see them thinking to themselves. Do they try to get one more drag out of the cigarette or do they put it out in the ashtray. Sometimes you will actually see the hesitation as they allmost put it out then reconsider and take that last drag off their cigarette.

If you really watch them as they put that cigarette out. You can allmost see the fear in their eyes. You can see the contemplation of deciding should they go catch the plane or do they have just enough time to **** down one more cigarette before they go on a plane where they will not be able to smoke for probably hours.

When you really watch them this way, you can really see that smokers don't GET to smoke. They HAVE to smoke.

Unfortunately, the smoking friends do not have this gift to choose. They do not have the luxory to smoke or not. Unless they want to feel withdrawal and anxiety, they must continue to smoke to feel what ex smokers already feel...Calmness.

This is such a cruel trick. Don't fall for it anymore.
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MrsRed8
MrsRed8

September 21st, 2008, 4:39 am #10

I am headed to the airport next week & this will be my first time on a plane smoke free. to be honest I was a little bit concerned about it really as I will only be smoke free not quite a month then. So thanks for the tip about watching the other smokers.

quit 3 weeks & loving it smell so much better.

Robin
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