Not Much of a Smoker

Joined: 07 Jan 2009, 20:37

15 Apr 2005, 23:17 #21

I too have just come upon your wonderful post today and as I have told many people and posted on this board, when urged by my doctor to quit, I have always answered, I don't smoke that much -- only ten a day. My doctor who complimented me on my weight control, exercise habits and great blood work results, commented, even if it's one, it's too many and you are negating all the good you are doing. That thought shall always stay with me and now that I am green (yesterday) with a long way to go, and taking it a day at a time, I know my doctor was right. Thanks for an inspiring post. I am passing it along to a friend of mine who is trying (?) desperately to quit. Maybe it will shed some light on her addiction.

Joined: 19 Dec 2008, 00:45

16 Apr 2005, 08:33 #22

Thank You, for the great post. I just came across it today. Like you I thought the same I am not that much of a smoker and all sorts of people around me smoke alot more then me, I must be ok, I have control. Until I tried to quit, oh so many times.
Also like Lo, so many people did not know that I smoked and now I tell them, I guess this is because I feel SO good about not smoking now. Now I can say, I am not a smoker.
What a wonderful talent you have for writing.
Keep up the great work and congrats on your progress

Kimberly - 20 days and about 22 hours.

kattatonic1 gold4
Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

16 Apr 2005, 12:23 #23

Hello Freedom friends,
Thanks for the nice comments about my old dramatic high horsin' post. The dramatics actually embarass me now but I'll blame it on the phase I was going through being Double Green when I wrote it. (I skipped the anger phase but did other emotional swinging!)
I am very proud of you all(!) and glad that something I wrote could be of some help. I wanted to check in to show you my stats these days.
The most important thing I learned about being Not Much of a Smoker was that I was in almost constant withdrawal for years. I learned that here at Freedom and WhyQuit. I thought I loved every cigarette because each one, after several hours of abstaining, was fulfilling the dependency I had on nicotine.
Law of addiction
Are "aaahh" memories calling your name?
Now I perceive the pursuit of that feeling as an addict searching for a high. We don't usually use the word "high" with nicotine addiction but I know I was looking for that "ahh" feeling all the time, particularly when I was binge smoking. It took me a while to find my "normal" here in Quitsville Image, but I cannot express to you how glad I am that I did. I don't need that "ahh" feeling any more.
Believe it or not, Ripley, I haven't even wanted that "ahh" feeling for a very, very, very long time. Freedom is fantastic! Keep up the great work, friends. You are worth it!
Kay (Gold)
Celebrating 1 Year, 3 Months, 23 Days, 18 Hours and 49 Minutes of Freedom!
Forsaking 9596 rolls of burning toxic weeds and chemicals
has liberated $3,131.97 and 33 Days and 7 Hours of my life!
Last edited by kattatonic1 gold4 on 12 Sep 2009, 11:18, edited 1 time in total.

JoeJFree Gold
Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

27 Oct 2005, 21:18 #24

Well Jamie,
If you liked Kay's Today is Some Day, One Day, Tomorrow and Monday
then I hope you and many others will enjoy another of the 'Kay Classics'.
ImageJoeJ Free on Day 290 and every day I choose to NTAP!
Last edited by JoeJFree Gold on 12 Sep 2009, 12:03, edited 2 times in total.

Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:58

27 Oct 2005, 21:45 #25

Wow how many chords does that strike with me? Let me count the ways.
I'm having another one of my "I'm not alone" moments. Image

I too had responses like "that's all you smoke? why bother then?"
* or *
(from an ex-smoker) "If I only smoked 4 or 5 a day I would have never quit!" - hmmm...who was I lying to then? 4 or 5 a day...puh-lease. Maybe a few times, thinking I was on my way to quitting by gradual withdrawal. Good thing I found Freedom so I could stop torturing myself. How ironic- I thought I was doing a good thing. It made me feel like I "deserved" those that I did smoke that much more.

I remember my father-in-law told me once (he's a recovering alcoholic for almost 30 years)...he told me that he used to smoke, and he had himself down to ONE cigarette a day. That's it, just one. At the end of his day in the evening. But if he didn't have that one, he'd pull his hair out. He was just as addicted to that one smoke, as I was to my "not many smokes." Just as addicted as some are to their 3+ packs a day.

Just when I think my eyes are wide open, I read another eye opener. Thank you so much Kay for writing another tremendous post. Image
And thank YOU JoeJ for popping it up. It's amazing that was written a mere 2 months into a quit...I have so many emotions regarding my quit but I could hardly dream of putting them down into such eloquent words.

What a great place. Freedom rocks.

jamie - workin on day 192

JoeJFree Gold
Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

24 Nov 2005, 14:17 #26

After a night in a smoky bar celebrating my daughter's 21st - Just had to post to this 'Kay Classic'.
Oh, did I mention that the cousin I refer to in Message 19 above, her name is Kathleen.Image
Her nickname - Kat.
"Afterward whenever I wanted to quit, I would marvel to my doctor, "How can it be so hard for me to quit? I barely smoke compared to most people I know!" She would say, "Someone who uses 5mg of heroine a day is just as much an addict as someone who uses 200mg a day."ImageImage

Doesn't matter the degree - an Addict is an Addict is an Addict! If you are not totally clean then your addiction is in control & callling the shots. You are not.

If you are totally clean then you ARE in control & calling your own shots.

Naturally, nicotine free, the way you were meant to be. NTAP!
Last edited by JoeJFree Gold on 12 Sep 2009, 12:02, edited 1 time in total.

JoeJFree Gold
Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

24 Jan 2006, 10:54 #27

For MJImage
see also - Quitting by gradual withdrawal

Joel's Audio lessons
Joel's Audio lessons
Quitting by gradual withdrawal 2.35mb 7.54mb 1.03mb 07:13 10/18/06
Last edited by JoeJFree Gold on 12 Sep 2009, 11:32, edited 2 times in total.

forza d animo
Joined: 04 Apr 2005, 07:00

02 May 2006, 22:53 #28

Jason's diary entry (381) made me think of this. It is perhaps most disconcerting when we see someone relapse who has been nicotine free for an extended period of time. Denial is an insidious disease of the mind that allows us to justify our self destructive behavior without having to admit to it. "It is only a cigar, it is only once a week and it is not actually smoking because I am not inhaling."

Regardless of your delivery device, it is still nicotine addiction.

I hope he finds his way back.


JoeJFree Gold
Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

08 Aug 2006, 09:59 #29

Reposting Kay's 'HighHorsin' classic For a recently arrived member who 'only smoked 1 - 3 cigarettes a day' as well as a few other reasons' near and dear to me.

Joe J exercising my Freedom of Choice for 574 Days (I know that for sure cause I looked it up on my Quit Counter) NTAP!

Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

28 Nov 2006, 04:13 #30

I almost could have written this, except my Not Much of a Smoker was in the closet. Brilliantly written! Thank you so much.