Junkie thought clouds starting to build. Why!

ccathy247
ccathy247

1:05 AM - Jul 01, 2009 #1

My quit has been quite easy and continues to be so. I am almost at three months.

I do appear to be doing food substitutions as witnessed by my weight gain but that's ok with me. I will take care of it later and have actually started to be firmer with myself of late.

I have had a few thoughts "of smoking and then quitting in a few months". I dismiss them immediately but they are starting to come into my mind.

Is it maybe because I am "starting to challenge my nicotine substitutions" that junkie rationalizations are appearing?? I don't have any nicotine craves at all.

I do have an unpleasant but necessary action to perform in a few weeks. Usually when I have thoughts of a cigarette I have experienced some feeling of discomfort be it ever so small.

Maybe it is the expectation of feeling uncomfortable that is bringing on the thoughts of resuming smoking? Guess I should try to perceive this task that I must perform as an action that will eventually have a positive outcome.

Read something recently about around three months, addiction comes back with a Masters in psychology. Did that post plant a seed in my mind???

Reading the Law of Addiction is powerful for me so.......
The Law of Addiction

"Administration of a drug to an addict will cause
re-establishment of chemical dependence
upon the addictive substance."


I have been quit for 2 Months, 2 Weeks, 6 Days, 21 hours, 4 minutes and 10 seconds (81 days). I have saved $81.87 by not smoking 1,637 cigarettes. I have saved 5 Days, 16 hours and 25 minutes of my life. My Quit Date: 10/04/2009 12:00 AM
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theMazeSays
theMazeSays

1:50 PM - Jul 01, 2009 #2

Cathy, wow! Can I ever relate to your description. Thank you for your candid and honest insight; I consider you a spiritual quit mate. Sometimes, just knowing that you have helped somebody else understand (and relate to) their own experience a little better may help you. Here's to health and long life--well lived!

I'm about where you are on the recovery path. I've noticed other less dramatic neuroses and hang-ups seem to be more pronounced, though they have always been lurking in the shadows. But I think the reality is that an 800 pound gorilla (addiction) is dead, and now I can get on with my life. Little things that I, well--simply don't like about myself have come to the forefront. The only thing that can make them recede is to address them. Hmmm, yet I suppose there is one, unthinkable, alternative.

Just plain thankful for whyQuit, FFN, and our lessons learned!

~maze

It has been 123 days 11 hours and 13 minutes since I arrested nicotine addiction. Refusing to inhale the exhaust from 2469 burning tobacco sticks has saved me $493.87 and added 18 days 20 hours and 42 minutes to my life!
Never Take Another Puff
Last edited by theMazeSays on 9:46 PM - Jul 01, 2009, edited 5 times in total.
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Joe J free
Joe J free

1:41 PM - Jul 17, 2009 #3

Welcome to the Bronze Club Cathy! At three months of freedom I'd say it is we who have obtained the Master of Psychology about addiction recovery. Our addiction cannot obtain a degree or take a form in any way. Like nicotine our addiction is chemically based. Our addiction dependency relationship to the substance nicotine has no cognition, no thought pattern, no malice aforethought. It simply is. It's a fact of life for those of us who unwittingly became caught in the snare all those years ago. However, even though we had grown dependent through repetitive use of the substance it need not define our future lives. As long as we choose to NTAP we are free and healing. Our dependency does not have to have an active part in our life going forward. That's the beauty of recovery. We heal, we get better, we adjust back to our true sense of self. This happens because nicotine is a non-essential chemical. It has no useful purpose, it serves no real need. If you are still - even unconsciously - harboring the thought or belief that nicotine (cigarette smoking) could help or assist you overcome a situation or event in some way then you are still healing from the many years we all held False Associations about what nicotine did or could do for us. This is an ever changing journey Cathy, congratulations to you for getting past a tough spot on the Freedom Road for you. You can do anything as just you - no additives required. Get free - Stay free - Live Free - NTAP.

Joe J free Four and a half years.
Last edited by Joe J free on 4:20 PM - Jul 17, 2009, edited 4 times in total.
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