"I miss smoking"

Retraining the conscious mind
OhRalph
Joined: 07 Jan 2009, 20:04

05 Jun 2004, 01:29 #11

Very well put. I don't think about smoking very much anymore but here and there it pops in my head.

But so do other things that I am nostalgic about and I have no desire to go back there either.

Once in awhile when I hear a Grateful Dead song I remember having long hair, wearing a head band, cut off shorts, beads, reeking of patchouli oil, standing barefoot at the front of the show but do I want to go back there?

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Do I want to be a smelly hippie? Do I want to scare old people? Of course not, that was then and this is now.

Your right that we are human and will sometimes remember things as being better than they were. The last time I ruined my quit I thought I was really craving a cigarette, but when I put it in my mouth and lit it up, it was not good and not satisfying like I had imagined. This was a turning point for me when I realized my perception of smoking was far better than it actually was.


Thanks for the post.

Ralph

I have been quit for 6 Months, 3 Days.
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naydeen gold
Joined: 07 Jan 2009, 20:02

05 Jun 2004, 08:40 #12

Hi, CF, thanks for checking back in!

The important thing is that you know in your heart of hearts that you are TOTALLY gold. Your on-screen name doesn't matter to us para-newbies -- just the fact that you got where you are, and that's where we are headed is what's important!

I'm lovin' that I'm headed down that road.

Naydeen

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JoeJFree Gold
Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

22 Apr 2005, 01:46 #13

Nostalgia is defined as a longing for the past often idealized and unrealistic; longing for something past; homesickness.

I do feel nostalgia for many things I've experienced in my life. However, not all memories qualify as nostalgia. Many rememberences and memories are good, some of them are painful, a few of them are bad and shameful. Smoking would not be in that first group, more appropriately I'd classify it in the last two. Is smoking a part of all those memories? Well, since I became addicted to nicotine from the time I was 9 smoking is as inseperable to my memories of life as nicotine is from tobacco. They will forever be a matched set. However, let me ask this question - Do you remember the day you graduated from grade school, high school, your first solo bike ride, your first kiss, the birth of your first child, your wedding day? Is the first thing you remember about these events is that you were a tobacco user?! When I remember great times in my life and friendships long gone I remember the good times and the friends, not that I smoked constantly (in the early years whenever I could sneak it in) because I had to feed my addiction. But maybe that's just my way of recalling memories.

Isn't recommending a controversial article like this one to a newbie a little like saying -
"Hello friend, welcome to Freedom, that's a really nice ball & chain you're dragging along there. Wanted to let you know there are two paths you can go by to find your Freedom & Comfort and get rid of that ball and chain*. On one path you put off making your final commitment to change. You'll get to wish and wonder, and yearn, and mope about what you're missing and drag around that ball & chain you're trying to get free of. Could make the journey a whole lot tougher but you'll find the process enirely doable with the right drive. After a while you'll wear that ball down to almost nothin. It'll get easier. I did find a key to get rid of the whole thing quite a ways down this path. I'm sure you'll find it too if you just stick with it and don't give up no matter what.
Now to walk on the other path you need to make a big and momentous decision. You need to make the commitment RIGHT NOW to get absolutely 100% comfortable with the decision to get rid of that ball and chain. I know you've had it with you for a long time and are pretty attached to it. Leave it behind, let it go. Don't need it anymore, didn't want it in the first place and I'll even bet you've wanted to get rid of that burden for a long, long time. Go ahead, take it off, here's the key to remove that shackle. Take this path, it's smooth easy walkin and the views and vista are spectacular as you travel. Go ahead, embrace and enjoy your walk to FREEDOM"

I'm forever grateful that I was lucky enough to find the path markers a few people were kind enough to leave behind that showed me there indeed was that second, smoother path.

That's my story and I'm stickin to it.
joejFree - Three months, one week, four days, 3 hours, 2 minutes and 30 seconds. 2528 cigarettes not smoked, saving $502.90. Life saved: 1 week, 1 day, 18 hours, 40 minutes.

*(OK I know we will NEVER totally get rid our addiction, that we don't beat it we learn to manage it, but in essence if we NTAP we will never wear that ball & Chain or have to drag it around with us again)
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Joel
Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

06 Jun 2005, 18:27 #14

ImageThis post addresses sentiments and questions raised by another longer-term member.
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hgLancer
Joined: 23 Sep 2011, 18:54

25 Sep 2011, 05:34 #15

Thank you for posting about this. The last time I told someone that I missed smoking (which happened after the last time I quit, not this one), peeps were all over me about it...said that it was NOT okay to miss smoking.

I also miss my last personal relationship, even though I had to end it (because it was unhealthy), and there were lots of nostalgic moments in that relationship as well. Things that I miss. My therapist asked me if I wanted to be in that relationship again and I flat out told her NO. Same goes with smoking. I miss it but it must not be a part of my life anymore.
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