" I'm different, I'll never be comfortable without nicotine "

" I'm different, I'll never be comfortable without nicotine "

Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:58

31 Jul 2002, 03:28 #1

Remember that little voice? Junkie Thinking!
" I'm different, I'll never be comfortable without nicotine "

" It just isn't a good time to quit, my life is so complicated"

Our addiction enjoys talking to us, we really need to get a bit closer and hear the truth....

We don't have to be strong to work through our addiction, we just have to be smart....

Maybe we can use this thread as a tool to share the hope for those working through the early stages of recovery. Feel free to join in, tell our new members what it is like to be a comfortable ex-smoker. : )

Quitting is really a process and what we are doing now is working through it. Here I am at three and a half years free, and I must tell you, there is no "junkie thinking" in my head, at any time. But, just like the a new quitter, I remain one puff away from relapse. In time, not smoking will be a way of life without the pains of our addiction scratching at the door, hence, that little voice. I often try to remember the times where smoking was just perfect for the situation (a wedding, funeral - etc), just to show myself the illogical mindset I once had. I am so proud and grateful to recognize the truth behind the lies - the stupidity of it all and how my life was once controlled by such a dangerous regiment, both physically and mentally.

For everyone recovering, thoughts of smoking will simply become a form of relief and nothing scary or bothersome. It is sort of like remembering something we did in our youth that wasn't too smart, we shook our heads and wondered what in the world we were thinking. When it comes to making vital decisions in life, it is amazing what a bit of growth and

understanding will do for any situation.

That little voice tried distorting my mindset - I often wondered if being clean from nicotine was always going to be some sort of inner struggle. I was positive that I was different than the rest. Life is different for each of us, but as nicotine addicts the promise of complete comfort is the same. We have taken the time to educate ourselves on addiction, this is where we find the true freedom. Free, meaning that we TRULY UNDERSTAND that we must NEVER TAKE ANOTHER PUFF...no matter what. Living out those situations and triggers associated to smoking and proving to ourselves, that life does go on without nicotine. No more going through the cycles of relapse or constant desires of wanting to quit and never knowing quite how. You are going to feel better, it will not be continuous work. Addiction has no cure, and of course, the remedy being... never taking that one puff. Be assured, you will not have to work on this forever.

The process is like learning to walk - it takes some patience and a bit of work to find our way...we do some observing and whatever it takes to get started...this along with the natural instinct to stand up and take those first steps...once we do....it may feel a bit unsteady...we hold on a bit and look to others for support...we do our best to keep going but we take little steps to keep the momentum going and give ourselves the chance to build up endurance and balance...we must be patient and take our time....before we know it....we are walking freely and all on our own....as time goes by it is natural that we take walking for granted....no more worries or work...we walk steady and enjoy our new freedom. BUT...no matter how long we have been walking freely....we must keep our eyes open and watch where we are going....if we happen to find an icy spot..we must call on our strategies that keep us from falling. There is no such thing as ONE PUFF for addicts, we would always end up taking ALL of them. A fall can cost us our lives.


It has always been helpful for me to read the concerns from new members, this not only serves as a reminder of what it once felt like to be an EX-SMOKER IN TEMPORARY RECOVERY but gives me the pleasure to share the truth and hope of what it REALLY feels like to be an EX-SMOKER IN TOTAL COMFORT. It gets better and better and I truly mean it. Pat yourself on the back for doing such a great job at working through this wonderful process, your life is certainly worth it!

Congratulations and a big warm welcome to all of our newbies. We hope you are finding the information and support helpful. Don't minimize for a second the great work you are doing, some folks could only dream of beginning this journey. So many smokers want to quit but can't quite find their way, very sad indeed. Just hold on tight because for each of us, the days of complete comfort do come. Thanks for being here with us, we look forward to making this wonderful journey with each of you. If you have any concerns or questions, feel free to get in touch with us. We must hold on tight..our lives are worth any temporary challenges, we deserve to be free from a killer addiction...the way we were meant to be!

Onward with baby steps....one day at a time....not one puff...no matter what.

Joanne
Gold Club



Last edited by Joanne Gold on 01 May 2013, 11:16, edited 2 times in total.
Reply
Like

Joined: 19 Dec 2008, 00:08

31 Jul 2002, 04:02 #2

thank you!

thought provoking and encouraging!

SandyBob
6 weeks, 6 days
Reply
Like

Joined: 19 Dec 2008, 00:00

31 Jul 2002, 04:07 #3

Joanne I can't even begin to expand on your post it was very well said I too am in a comfort zone that I NEVER thought I would be after smoking for 40+ years. It was a way of life something that I did and did not even hesitate to think about except when I "thought" I'd like to quit. Tried probably 5 times in my 40+ years but you just can't do it without education and the knowledge that you are an addict. Gosh I never wanted that word associated with me. But guess what when I read Whyquit.com and Joel's library I was extremely upset with those words telling me that I was an addict and then I realized that the truth will set you free and it has Education is a must, support is a very much needed, willpower and committment are so important and we owe it to ourselves to live the way we are meant to live SMOKE, NICOTINE FREE, quitting; is the best thing that I have done for myself and i'm so proud that I am now an exsmoker. Thanks Freedom Cathy ~ 1 Year 6 Months (almost 7 months) :))
Reply
Like

Joined: 19 Dec 2008, 00:03

31 Jul 2002, 04:49 #4

Joanne - wonderful article.
I too, thought that I would never live a life without nictine after smoking for 30 years! I felt that it was pointless for me to even try to quit especially when I knew I'd never make it. "Little" do we know. Education is so important. It's like your first year of school. If they don't teach you anything and you are not learning........alas, you repeat the same year over again. I'm thankful to a friend who found this site for me prior to my QUIT and the information I was able to glean from it. With the knowledge I have gained I have found it difficult to not PREACH to my smoking buddies! But, it's interesting since they've been watching my QUIT, they have all set their own QUIT dates since they've seen me do it. They too thought I wouldn't never make it without the nicotine. But, this is my QUIT and I'm enjoyng my FREEDOM. I now wish them luck in their QUITS and to remember to stay strong, keep healthy and TO NEVER TAKE ANOTHER PUFF!

Catherine
"I'd rather be an ex-smoker who has an occasional thought about smoking than a smoker obsessing about quitting."
I have not smoked for 2 Months 3 Weeks 3 Days 14 Hours 46 Minutes 41 Seconds.
I'M NEVER TAKING ANOTHER PUFF!
Reply
Like

Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:58

31 Jul 2002, 06:57 #5

Beautifully said, and so true it hurt - my friends all smoke still, even knowing the success I'm having here they are manufacturing their own little junkie excuses to continue their habit. I had to let go of my junkie thinking - particularly about so much going on I just can't quit "right now"...
But you know, one day you realize that EVERYDAY....ya just can't quit "right now". It will always be "not today" and years go by. That's when you make the decision to quit or smoke for the rest of your life - when you accept that you are not "stronger" than nicotine....everything gets easier.

Thanks for putting that up today Joanne!

Dos (Dubious)
9 Weeks 7 Hours 56 Minutes
Reply
Like

Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:59

31 Jul 2002, 08:08 #6

Hi Joanne, I'd just like to say:
For everyone recovering, thoughts of smoking will simply become a form of relief and nothing scary or bothersome. It is sort of like remembering something we did in our youth that wasn't too smart, we shook our heads and wondered what in the world we were thinking. When it comes to making vital decisions in life, it is amazing what a bit of growth and understanding will do for any situation.

That little voice tried distorting my mindset - I often wondered if being clean from nicotine was always going to be some sort of inner struggle. I was positive that I was different than the rest. Life is different for each of us, but as nicotine addicts the promise of complete comfort is the same. We have taken the time to educate ourselves on addiction, this is where we find the true freedom. Free, meaning that we TRULY UNDERSTAND that we can NEVER TAKE ANOTHER PUFF...no matter what. Living out those situations and triggers associated to smoking and proving to ourselves, that life does go on without nicotine. No more going through the cycles of relapse or constant desires of wanting to quit and never knowing quite how. You are going to feel better, it will not be continuos work. Addiction has no cure, and of course, the remedy being... never taking that one puff. Be assured, you will not have to work on this forever.

The process is like learning to walk - it takes some patience and a bit of work to find our way...we do some observing and whatever it takes to get started...this along with the natural instinct to stand up and take those first steps...once we do....it may feel a bit unsteady...we hold on a bit and look to others for support...we do our best to keep going but we take little steps to keep the momentum going and give ourselves the chance to build up endurance and balance...we must be patient and take our time....before we know it....we are walking freely and all on our own....as time goes by it is natural that we take walking for granted....no more worries or work...we walk steady and enjoy our new freedom. BUT...no matter how long we have been walking freely....we must keep our eyes open and watch where we are going....if we happen to find an icy spot..we must call on our strategies that keep us from falling. There is no such thing as ONE PUFF for addicts, we would always end up taking ALL of them. A fall can cost us our lives.


It has always been helpful for me to read the concerns from new members, this not only serves as a reminder of what it once felt like to be an EXSMOKER IN TEMPORARY RECOVERY but gives me the pleasure to share the truth and hope of what it REALLY feels like to be an EXSMOKER IN TOTAL COMFORT. It gets better and better and I truly mean it. Pat yourself on the back for doing such a great job at working through this wonderful process, your life is certainly worth it!

Congratulations and a big warm welcome to all of our newbies. We hope you are finding the information and support helpful. Don't minimize for a second the great work you are doing, some folks could only dream of beginning this journey. So many smokers want to quit but can't quite find their way, very sad indeed. Just hold on tight because for each of us, the days of complete comfort do come. Thanks for being here with us, we look forward to making this wonderful journey with each of you. If you have any concerns or questions, feel free to get in touch with us. We must hold on tight..our lives are worth any temporary challenges, we deserve to be free from a killer addiction...the way we were meant to be!

Onward with baby steps....one day at a time....not one puff...no matter what.
but somebody beat me to it......
but I wholeheartedly endorse every word !!! -richard
Reply
Like

Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

31 Jul 2002, 08:15 #7

Thank you, Joanne!

Melissa
Gold Club
Reply
Like

Joined: 07 Jan 2009, 19:06

31 Jul 2002, 08:31 #8

I am a relatively newbie, but already I don't think about smoking all the time like I did when I was addicted. It is so much better being a recovering addict, than an active one!!! Glad to be FREEEEEEE!!! WHEEEEE!! Kat44 I have chosen not to smoke for 1 Month 2 Weeks 4 Days 21 Hours 59 Minutes 19 Seconds. Cigarettes not smoked: 978. Money saved: $141.37.
Reply
Like

Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

31 Jul 2002, 10:10 #9

If someone had come up to me during day three of any of my prior quits and told me that if I just hung in there - one day at a time - that it wouldn't be toooo long before I'd begin experiencing a deeper sense of inner calmness than I'd ever know while smoking, I would have thought them I liar! If they'd told me that it was far far easier being an recovered nicotine addict than making sure I was fully prepared for my next required nicotine feeding, I would have thought them a liar!

If they'd told me that I'd still be the exact same person, that I  keep my edge (or maybe better) and that all I'd be giving up was my chemical dependency, I would have thought them a liar. If they'd told me that it really wasn't too late to stop the damage and in many cases reverse it, and that unless the damage was permanent that within just 90 days I should expect an almost one-third increase in overall lung function, I would have thought them a liar.

All I can say now is that the lies were the bars that kept me a prisoner inside my own mind. It isn't necessary that you believe any of us but I do think you've earned the right to see for yourself what it's really like being free! As Papa Jim used to say, if you give it 90 days and you're not totally satisfied with the new you, we'll gladly give you a 100% refund of your misery! Thanks for the comfort thread Jo! John : )
Last edited by John (Gold) on 30 Mar 2010, 18:41, edited 1 time in total.
Reply
Like

Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:58

31 Jul 2002, 10:14 #10

Thank you Joanne for a great post.

I was one of those that didn't think I would ever be comfortable without my fix of nicotine. Just goes to show you what an education on nicotine addiction can do for you.

The thrill when you first realize you didn't think about smoking all day!!!!! Boy does that ever build your self-esteem. There are so many things to look forward to in this quitting process.

Newbies, the time will come when you are comfortable without smoking. When you are feeling down, just post and let your feelings be known.

I cannot even imagine I would ever want to put another cigarette in my mouth.

Nora
1Y,11M,25D
Reply
Like

Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:58

31 Jul 2002, 11:47 #11

Joanne,

Well said. Thanks for you thoughts. They left me with many of my own thoughts to reflect upon.

Roger

7 Months
Reply
Like

Joined: 07 Jan 2009, 19:06

31 Jul 2002, 12:11 #12

Joanne,
I can't believe you and Marty posting identical themes today...it was like you were reading my mind (see my post on Marty's). I really thought it would be getting easier but it's getting harder...this scares me a little. I guess it doesn't matter because I know what I need and have to do...but thanks for reminding me that the future will be better.
TJ
I have chosen not to smoke for 3 Weeks 1 Day 20 Hours 2 Minutes 57 Seconds. Cigarettes not smoked: 913. Money saved: $159.85.
Reply
Like

Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:58

31 Jul 2002, 13:16 #13

Hi T John, I was just processing some of Freedom's new applications (hey, where are all these new guys coming from?) and took one last look at the board before bed when I discovered your post, thanks for the input. I hear ya loud and clear with the uncertainty of it all. During my early days I remember really zeroing in on the ONE DAY AT A TIME concept.
Just get through the moment and don't worry about the next one until it comes. It really is the key here. Joel tells us, for some, we are led to think it gets harder as more time goes by. What may be really going on here - those first few days every minute is a constant thought about quitting...no matter what we seem to do, we are reminded that we no longer are reaching for nicotine. Then, it really doesn't take long to get used to the fact that we no longer need a fix, our body is not in a constant roller coaster of withdrawal. As we gain this comfort and a situation does occur, a trigger to smoke, it about startles us since every moment is no longer focused on smoking. Boy, did I just confuse you or what. lol I'll attach Joel's article* he explains this much better than I can.

We can tell you in thousands of posts that things get better but you will see for yourself, soon enough, everything falls into place. As I said in my post, I thought myself to be different and didn't truly believe things would be back to normal. Normal? Heck, some of us had been smoking for so long we had no recollection as to what it felt like not to be controlled by a drug.


Hold on tight T John, focus on your reasons for quitting, look upon each day as a true victory for not taking that first one. As our other John says...it's doable!

Anyway, it is getting late here but I wanted you to know that we are listening and understanding your present concerns. Great work, and congratulations for taking your life back! What a wonderful gift you have given to yourself, hold it close.


A big thanks to everyone else who responded, I appreciate your support and valued input.



Never take another puff...

Your friend - Joanne



*
Thoughts that seem worse than the first days urges



You said it would get better but it's just as bad!



Smoking triggers



Why am I still having "urges?"


Emotional loss experienced when quitting


Last edited by Joanne Gold on 30 Mar 2010, 18:50, edited 2 times in total.
Reply
Like

Joined: 19 Dec 2008, 00:00

31 Jul 2002, 22:36 #14

Please read this Lance, every single word is very true to all of us, and thanks Joanne for a lovely post. and here I was thinking it had been me who was different from the rest and needed nicotene more than anyone else, seems I was wrong then yet again I find out that none of the feelings we go through are unique.
Love Naymor xxxx
Reply
Like

Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:58

13 Oct 2002, 17:05 #15

Every nicotine addict has asked it....
"Now that I have learned so much about my addiction and understand that I should never take another puff....how long will it take to feel comfortable where I am not constantly thinking about smoking?"
Moving through the twists and turns of daily life are the stepping stones to comfort and freedom.
Experience is the essence!
Last edited by Joanne Gold on 30 Mar 2010, 18:51, edited 1 time in total.
Reply
Like

Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:58

24 Oct 2002, 14:43 #16

For those of you out there struggling a bit, I hope this helps.
Hang in there!
Reply
Like

Joined: 19 Dec 2008, 00:00

15 Dec 2002, 20:42 #17

(((JoAnne)))

I've been caught lurking! Even us old timers come around once in a while for a good dose of re-inforcement. Once an addict, always an addict:)

I began smoking at 9. It took me 35 years to find Freedom. I am truly one of those people of whom you speak. I truly did not know what "normal" was. I did not remember a time in my life ever that I wasn't looking for a smoke. Was I scared? You bet I was! Like John says, my addiction was supported by years and years of my own self-denial! Deep down inside I really didn't know if I even wanted to live without them! Or if I even could! If cigarettes were killing me then what the heck. Live by the sword, die by the sword. Yes, I really have said that.

Knowledge is what gives us the power to walk through all our fears. We learn that it is the substance that keeps us in bondage. Only by clearing it from our systems do we really have the freedom to choose. For those of you struggling remember that you have the secret weapon...the truth. When you feel scared or weak, remind yourself of what you know. Come back here and re-inforce it. Every day you are dis-abling triggers. Every day you are learning to live without a smoke. There is a wonderful day just ahead for you. It is the day you wake up, look in the mirror and see that brand new wonderful self, the one that doesn't need or want nicotine anymore.

Big hugs, Joy


~Two years, six months, one week, four days, 10 hours, 41 minutes and 44 seconds. 18488 cigarettes not smoked, saving $2,958.36. Life saved: 9 weeks, 1 day, 4 hours, 40 minutes~
Reply
Like

Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:58

21 Jan 2003, 04:15 #18

You know, Tess and I were talking last night about a friend who's approaching a month nic-free. Last year, when the 2 of us quit, our friend was pretty certain that she had no desire to quit, and no confidence that she ever could.

Tess and I agreed that an important component of both her eventual decision to quit, and of maintaining her resolve over the rough patches during her first few weeks, was the assurance from others who had walked the path, that life IS comfortable for ex-smokers.... in fact, more comfortable than it was as a smoker (not having to deal with chronic withdrawal and all). In addition to Tess and me, 3 other common friends have quits going of 5 months or more. Our friend has been able to see several friends go through the trials of withdrawal and adjustment, and come out on the other side, finding themselves leading more comfortable lives than before.

At somewhere between 2 and 3 weeks, I was finding it pretty rough. My junky mind was in overdrive, and the assurances of those who'd walked before me were sounding like distant voices. At some point, though, I decided to take it on faith...... I am no different than the others here with respect to the comfort that awaits me after quitting. I decided it was worth at least another couple weeks of doing the same to find out. I'd come that far.... let's see if I'm different or not. I'll never know if I just go back to smoking now.

Guess what.... they were right. Within a couple weeks, I was feeling REAL comfort. The kind they'd told me about. There were still challenges, but they were getting easier. And it just kept getting better.

When you're in the depths of it, at some point, you've got to look at your situation and say, I've come this far, let's see if they're telling me the truth, or quit trying and never know.

You're not different. It gets better. I promise.

Reply
Like

Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:58

01 Apr 2003, 13:23 #19

....how long will it take to feel comfortable where I am not constantly thinking about smoking?
Moving through the twists and turns of daily life are the stepping stones to comfort and freedom.
Experience is the essence!
Reply
Like

Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:58

06 May 2003, 10:15 #20

For Lynda (comfort is yours, if you'll allow it to be)...

Last edited by OBob Gold on 30 Mar 2010, 19:04, edited 1 time in total.
Reply
Like

Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

20 May 2003, 08:03 #21

OBob wrote:

At some point, though, I decided to take it on faith...... I am no different than the others here with respect to the comfort that awaits me after quitting. I decided it was worth at least another couple weeks of doing the same to find out. I'd come that far.... let's see if I'm different or not. I'll never know if I just go back to smoking now.
Guess what.... they were right. Within a couple weeks, I was feeling REAL comfort. The kind they'd told me about. There were still challenges, but they were getting easier. And it just kept getting better.

And he was right!

Melissa
23 months
Reply
Like

Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

26 Jun 2003, 22:46 #22

Due to our own prior quitting history or horror stories from  others, we may start this temporary journey of adjustment with a humble or even frightened sense of confidence but before long a warm smile floods our mind and face as we truly begin to believe, with every fiber of your being, that this quit is different. This is it! Freedom's dream is unfolding before our eyes!

If every smoker on earth could magically spend just one day again feeling that almost constant sense of calmness that resided inside their mind immediately before climbing aboard that endless nicotine/dopamine roller coaster ride of highs and lows, they'd seize that day as motivation for the journey home to "them." There's no pot of gold at the end of the quit rainbow. Instead, what you'll find, all the gold in the world cannot buy. What awaits you is "you," fully engaging every aspect of life without the need to feed nicotine's two-hour chemical half-life.

Forget a momen about improved breathing, smoking related health concerns, living a full life, the pile of money your save, your loved ones, and all the social pressures, what about starting home - just one hour and challenge at a time - as your loving gift of "you" to "you!" Anything the chemically captive you can do, the free and real you can do even better!

Patience, baby steps, the next few minutes will always be doable and no subconsciously triggered crave episode will last longer than three minutes. Be sure and look at a clock as time distortion during early cessation is very real! Also, remember to put a small amounts of fuel into your tummy every few hours as nicotine will no longer be feeding you by pumping stored fats and sugars into your bloodstream via adrenaline releases. We don't need to add wild avoidable blood-sugar swing symptoms to our journey!
Breathe deep, hug hard, live long! John - The Gold Club
Last edited by John (Gold) on 30 Mar 2010, 18:53, edited 1 time in total.
Reply
Like

Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

30 Jul 2003, 09:49 #23

Is there any challenge out there that's bigger than your dreams?
or
Will the next few minutes always be doable?
Reply
Like

Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

11 Sep 2003, 21:08 #24

We Are "Real" Drug Addicts

If you removed all nicotine from your brand of cigarettes how long do you think you would have continued smoking them? According to R.J. Reynolds Tobacco Company the tobacco industry has known that nicotine was the sine qua non of smoking for over thirty years. How long have you had to come to terms with this critical realization?

It will be very difficult to not become comfortable without nicotine if you'll only use the next few weeks to be honest with you. We each walked through life insulated by a thick blanket of dependency, cost and recovery denial that protected us  from truth.

Our inital youthful decision to like or not like the dopmaine spike sensed within 8 to 10 seconds of that first puff of nicotine (that aaahhh sensation) became meaningless once we became chemically hooked. What was our only alternative? Look around at Freedom. This forum reflects the only alternative any of us had - withdrawal and recovery to the "real" us!

Being truthful about the entire spectrum of a nicotine addict's feeding cycle should help allow you to find you again. Yes, there was a dopamine spike but the bottom spike the anxiety, inner turmoil and sense of depression of going far beyond the real you and a crashing type low below. Yes, there was a dopamine spike but the other end of the spike can be easily seen here at Freedom (Help Me - SOS).

But Freedom isn't about artifical chemical highs and lows but about you developing the honesty, insight, recovery philosophy, and basic patience needed to give yourself an opportunity to meet "you" again.

Drug addiction isn't about getting high but about feeling normal. Somewhere between the dopamine high and the anxiety/depressive low resides the "real" you. It's a comfortable place where the sad moments of life are lived and not escaped from by nicotine providing a sudden burst of dopamine. On the other end, home is also a place where the joyous moments in life are not being constantly interrupted by the anxieties associated with badly needing another fix.

This place isn't about quitting you but recovering you! Each and every crave episode that's moved beyond is a true sign restoring the real you. Each and every smoking related thought is a golden opportunity to cast it in honest light and set the record straight. There is no such thing as one (addiction denial), smoking nicotine is self-destructive (cost denial), and you are no different than us and you can again be comfortable as you (recovery deinal).

For most of us this is the most amazing journey in healing that we've ever embarked upon. These are speical days, a time to proud of you. Forget about tomorrow, the next few minutes are all that really matter and there's only one rule - no nicotine today, Never Take Another Puff! John
Last edited by John (Gold) on 30 Mar 2010, 18:54, edited 1 time in total.
Reply
Like

Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:58

04 Dec 2003, 12:57 #25

"For everyone recovering, thoughts of smoking will simply become a form of relief and nothing scary or bothersome. It is sort of like remembering something we did in our youth that wasn't too smart, we shook our heads and wondered what in the world we were thinking.When it comes to making vital decisions in life, it is amazing what a bit of growth and understanding will do for any situation."
Reply
Like