How Would You Deal With the Following Situations?

The emotions that flow from nicotine cessation

How Would You Deal With the Following Situations?

Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

06 Oct 2000, 20:03 #1

Joel's Reinforcement Library

How would you deal with
the following situations?

Your 2-year-old is having a temper tantrum because he wants a new toy. Would you;
  1. Leave him alone until he calmed down
  2. Give into his demands
  3. Give him a tranquilizer
Your 7-year-old is anxious about next weeks' Little League tryouts. Would you;
  1. Assure him that he can do it
  2. Practice with him and tell him to try his best
  3. Give him a valium every three hours until the game
Your 14-year-old is crushed when she is not asked to the sophomore dance. Would you;
  1. Fix her up with one of your friend's children
  2. Tell her to go anyway
  3. Give her cocaine to pick up her spirits
Your 15-year-old is self-conscious about being 5 pounds overweight. Would you;
  1. Cook lower calorie meals
  2. Enroll her in a diet or exercise program
  3. Put her on appetite suppressants

All of these young people are experiencing what adults would consider "growing pains." A little time, patience and positive reassuring will help them overcome all of these difficult situations.

The fact is, as long as anyone continues to develop physically, emotionally, intellectually, professionally or spiritually, they too will experience growing pains. Adults are prone to hurt, pain, sadness, depression and anxiety just as children are. These feelings are all necessary if we wish to continue to develop our minds and bodies. Without such growth, we would not experience happiness, satisfaction, contentment or purpose to their full extent.

The third choice in each of the above situations was, of course, ridiculous. We would not subject our children to chemical hazards to overcome such trivial problems. However, as adults we are fully capable of practicing such dangerous behaviors for our own relief. Take cigarette smoking as an example.

When you were still a smoker, how many times would you say you had to smoke because you were lonely and sad without your friendly cigarettes? How many times did you say that you had to smoke because of all the stress in your life? How many times did you tell yourself that many social activities were just not fun without your cigarettes? How many times did you say that you would gain too much weight if you quit smoking? All you were saying was that you needed nicotine, a drug, to overcome everyday life problems.

It was not until you were off cigarettes that you realized you could overcome such problems without smoking, and in most cases more effectively than when you were a smoker. Once you had quit you realized just how much a source of stress the habit was to you. You were caught by a socially unacceptable and physically deadly addiction and were quite often aware of it. This is when you had the desire to give them up, but thought the pain of quitting too great to even attempt it.

Even today, you probably still desire an occasional cigarette. It may be in a stressful situation, at a party after a few drinks, or at a time when you find yourself alone with nothing better to do. The fact is, there is nothing worse you can do than take a cigarette. One cigarette will not help you over the problem. In reality, it will create a new problem, a disastrous situation of a reinforced addiction, with all the physical dangers and associated dirty habits.

So, next time you have the desire for a cigarette, sit back and take a few moments to reflect upon what you are setting yourself up for. Do you need that drug? Do you want that addiction? If not, simply remember - NEVER TAKE ANOTHER PUFF!

© Joel Spitzer 1982, 2000
Last edited by Joel on 29 Jul 2009, 01:50, edited 1 time in total.

nomadfaerie gold
Joined: 19 Dec 2008, 00:00

07 Oct 2000, 03:49 #2

Thank you, Joel. I needed to hear this right about now. OK, so I need to hear pretty much everything right about now, but you know what I mean... Smiles (regrettably, I am at the moment, gifless, sniffle) Peace Nomad Refusing to be seduced by the enemy for Six days, 14 hours, 47 minutes and 3 seconds. 264 cigarettes not smoked, saving $52.93. Life saved: 22 hours, 0 minutes.

Joined: 07 Jan 2009, 19:00

07 Oct 2000, 05:02 #3

Of course we would never "help" our children in a difficult situation by giving them any kind of drug - funny that we were so willing to do it to ourselves. And I would be lying if I said that a cigarette doesn't pop into my mind when I encounter something difficult or troubling even now . I hope that feeling eventually disappears. Until then...................
One month, two weeks, one day, 15 hours, 7 minutes and 0 seconds. 1165 cigarettes not smoked, saving $204.01. Life saved: 4 days, 1 hour, 5 minutes.
Last edited by Joyce on 29 Jul 2009, 01:52, edited 1 time in total.

Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

25 Feb 2001, 23:32 #4

Some problems and feeling happening here are just life going on without smoking. Hold cigarettes accountable for what they did to you, they were controlling you, costing you a small fortune, crippling you and killing you. But they didn't cause all of lifes problems. Life itself causes its own sets of obstacle and problems. You will survive them all though as long as you remember to never take another puff!


Joined: 07 Jan 2009, 19:41

27 Feb 2001, 01:09 #5

Wow, that article is a great way of putting the foolishness of smoking into perspective. Thanks Joel!

I have been nicotine free for: 4W 1D 2h. I have NOT smoked 582, for a savings of $87.31. Life Saved: 2D 30m.

Joined: 07 Jan 2009, 19:03

27 Feb 2001, 02:02 #6

Image Thanks for posting this one....needed to hear it! I am getting ready for my smoking husband to come back. He knows I quit and is VERY supportive, I just don't want to cave. I know I won't just that first initial night is going to be hard, but I know I will be fine! The problems we have during smoking are there, wether we like it or not and having a cig didn't make it any better, it made it worse! Thanks Joel!
2 weeks today!!Image

improud (golder)
Joined: 19 Dec 2008, 00:00

27 Feb 2001, 02:10 #7

Glad I saw this thread. I couldn't post this weekend because I messed up my computer and I think deleted Netscape. It's there just can't bring it up. Anyway had a really hard time this weekend, junkie thinking and all and thought a cig would help. Knew it wouldn't and I had a vivid dream last night that I smoked and kept counting the cigarettes that I smoked. I woke up this morning really upset. But this too shall pass. NEVER TAKE ANOTHER PUFF, those four words got me through the weekend. Thanks FreedomImage I have been Quit for: 1M 3W 1D 14h 32m 44s. I have NOT smoked 1608, for a savings of $241.22. Life Saved: 5D 14h.
Last edited by improud (golder) on 29 Jul 2009, 01:53, edited 1 time in total.

Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

09 Apr 2001, 21:09 #8

I am bringing this up because of the depression and medicine discussions today. I am not saying medicines are not sometimes necessary, but at the same time, I don't want people to think they are always necessary either. For initial down times encountered from quitting the feelings will normally adjust, especially if your resolve is strong and your mindset is positive. But, for some people, there are other issues that may need attention.

Again, nobody at the board can truly assess anyone else as to what they need for their specific problem. It is just improbable to really hear and understand with any accuracy the full extent of a persons feelings on line, and basically impossible to diagnose the organic basis of anything, no matter how educated a person may be.

If questions of medical or emotional issues are raised, the best advice is still for the person to seek live professional medical or psychological attention. Never feel that advising this is passing the buck, it is doing the person the best favor possible. Again, as this text talks about, some feelings in life are normal, but others may need attention and if you are ever questioning which category your specific feelings are in, get checked out by your medical professional to get an objective opinion.

To stay healthier and happier over your lifetime, stay on top of your life to the best of your own devices, seek help when things are beyond your grasp or control, and as far as smoking goes just always remember to never take another puff!


Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

14 Jul 2001, 11:17 #9

We must be careful not to assume all bad days or feelings are from not smoking. Life too goes on and has its moments. The important thing is to recognize how to deal with times of adversity as an free and independent adult, as opposed to an addict uising a drug to escape dealing with lifes pitfalls.

John (Gold)
Joined: 18 Dec 2008, 23:57

12 Jan 2004, 22:07 #10

  • Is there any guarantee that you'd ever come this far again?
  • Your brain was tuned and conditioned to function around nicotine's two-hour chemical half-life. What would be different next time?
  • How much more time do you have before risking being among the one-quarter of adult nicotine smokers who fail to live beyond middle-age, or the half for whom a birthday near their 60th is the last they'll ever see?
  • What chemical is worth surrenduring up to one-third of your functional lung capacity and a substantial portion of your ability to smell and taste?