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It is true that we don't want people to jump in and share every birthday or anniversary or job promotion or numerous other events. Because we have so many members if everyone were to share every event we would have major celebratory threads everyday. The board would be cluttered with such posts and more substantive posts would soon be buried in the fray."I haven't been to Freedom in a couple weeks because I had my baby on November 4th. Despite a long labor and emergency C-section, everything is absolutely wonderful and we have a healthy little boy named Kevin Michael.
I didn't know if I should start a post on this at Freedom (I didn't want to create a diversion--it's a fine line I guess) but you had asked me a few months back to report on my post-partum feelings and if there were any triggers present. I'm delighted to report that I've had no post-partum depression in the slightest, and the only time I've thought about cigarettes is when my husband comes back inside after smoking and I make him wash his hands!
Every now and then we receive word that one of Freedom's messages has apparently been copied and posted at another quitting forum. It's often done by a visitor here who decides to take part of their visit home with them to share with members at their own forum but we beg all visitors and members alike to NEVER do so. Almost all other online forums are either mixed cold turkey and NRT quitters, or exclusively NRT.Mixed forums are doing their very very best under difficult circumstances to attempt to support all quitters regardless of the method chosen. To create division or controversy within any mixed support group only weakens the effectiveness of the entire forum. This isn't some game and there are quitters at every forum who, like it or not, have, to one degree or another, invested their confidence into a particular cessation method, procedure or product. We nicotine addicts share a common bond and when one of us breaks free, regardless of how, it's time for celebration by all!The two figures I most commonly use at WhyQuit when discussing efficacy are Dr. Hughes and Dr. Shiffman's March 2003 OTC NRT meta analysis figure of 7%, which was established by combining and averaging the results of all seven OTC patch and gum studies, and the 10% "on-your-own" six month cold turkey rate, that is at the low end for control and placebo group rates presented in all evidence tables of the June 2000 U.S. Guideline.What we each need to keep in mind is that these figures are BOTH horrible but that they BOTH reflect unassisted, uneducated and unsupported rates and can be tremendously enhanced if either method is combined with solid support and/or education programs. To disrupt a support program or engage in divisive debate diminishes the forum's effectiveness for all quitters within the group.We now make all applicants assert that they've read Our Courtesies prior to acceptance into the group and although not required we pray you'll apply them no matter what forum you visit, including our non-debate policy.The following is a portion of our Mission Statement :If we are not right for you please don't join. It would be like joining a religious group in order to convert all of their existing followers to your belief or joining a political party for the sole purpose of having all its members vote for the opposing party candidate. When a person joins a group under these terms they are not joining a group, they are trying to subvert the group. This is an act of hostility not an act of support or camaraderie.When a member joins a mixed cessation method support group they hopefully do so dedicated to an attempt to ensure that every member within the forum receives the very best opportunity possible to break the bonds that bind them - not to divide, weaken and disrupt the forum.Joanne, Linda and I all came from mixed forums where we worked hard to help every member break free regardless of method. Freedom started as a mixed forum as well. Although not easy, we worked hard making our NRT members as comfortable as possible within the group during our transition into the internet's first forum devoted exclusively supporting abrupt nicotine cessation.We have lots of members who started their journey with NRT and each day of their healing and freedom from nicotine is every bit as potent as any other members. Although we treat nicotine dependency regardless of delivery device, and we measure cessation only in terms of nicotine cessation, to preach our philosophy into a mixed forum could be devastating to the moral of every quitter not going cold.Yes, we share all the latest NRT study data both at WhyQuit and sometimes here at Freedom but we don't do so to provide a basis for dispute but so that those about to quit can make informed decisions by seeing important data that they would not otherwise likely ever see.We beg your assistance in keeping the big picture and what's at stake in mind. Although others may choose different paths, for us there's only one rule, no nicotine today, Never Take Another Puff! John
Freedom is DifferentIf you are a new arrival to Freedom, looking in and trying to compare what you see here to what you'll find at other forums, it's really rather simple. This is one place on the Internet where the actively feeding nicotine addict gets no voice. We each already know most of the excuses used in order to justify that next fix, or used to attempt to explain relapse, and the time for games is over.
If you're looking for a fun filled place to make lots of new friends, a place that celebrates birthdays, anniversaries, hundreds of national or religious holidays, or where each new world current event gets discussion, focus or tribute, this isn't it.
But if you're looking for a place that attempts to take your freedom, health and life expectancy as seriously as the risks posed by your addiction, then you are in the right place. The risk that continuing dependency upon smoking nicotine will permanently impair or cripple your mind and health is tremendous. The risk that smoking will deprive you of 13 to 14 years of life is 50%.
Only in a drug addict's mind is an exchange of 5,000 sunrises for one chemical a rational trade. If you're not afraid to explore an addict's mind then you're in the right place.
We ask that you check your ego and sensitivities at the door as words are the only window we have into the junkie mind. Honesty may feel like tough love but do expect our members to notice and explore every potential denial minimization, rationalization and blame transference they see, as to ignore them is to leave you with fuel for relapse.
This can be the most amazing adventure we'll ever make if only we'll open our minds to the possibility that the real quitting took place on the day nicotine took control. Millions of words here at Freedom but just one guiding principle determining the outcome for all (a principle that will always be our common bond) ... no nicotine today, Never Take Another Puff, Dip, or Chew! John (Gold x5)
|From: Joel.||Sent: 9/13/2001 12:08 PM|
| I am bringing this one up again because I want to reemphasize the importance of keeping Freedom focused on not smoking. We appreciate that most of the rest of our members from other countries are behind America at this terrible time, but in fact we are not an American board, and we are not a board focused on any political or ideological issues, no matter how popular they may be. We are a truly international site whose members share one purpose--to break free and stay free from tobacco. |
People come here to focus their attention on the importance of their quits. It is not that we are trying to be an escape here from other world issues. We all suspect most of our members are absorbed a good part of their days now on other issues and keeping apprised of such matters are likely of great importance. But I would suspect that if anyone here went to a bulletin board designed for supporting victims of terrorism and started writing about quitting smoking issues, you'd either be ignored or ridiculed by the majority of members there.
I would hope neither situation would happen, that instead of being ignored or ridiculed you'd be directed to go to a support group whose interest was helping you to quit smoking. That is what we feel here, that if any of our members feels the need to let out feelings on terrorism or support of America, spend time at sites dedicated to those premises. But spend your time here supporting your quit or helping others support their quits.
We are Freedom from Tobacco, and our members here are fighting to sustain their health and enhance the quality and lengths of their lives. They accomplish these goals by continuing to reinforce their focus and resolve to never take another puff!
What kind of focus would Noni have found if she'd arrived here while there was still time to make a difference? We're told that one-quarter of all adult smokers will die in middle-age. It may be true but let us dedicate ourselves to never being party to helping make it happen. Just one rule ... no nicotine today, Never Take a Puff!