Get Stuffed, Truck Boy

James Ceno
Advanced Member
James Ceno
Advanced Member
Joined: January 19th, 2015, 3:58 am

June 1st, 2016, 3:47 am #1

~”Hell” by Disturbed shakes the arena as the fans, with mixed cheers, welcome James Ceno to the building. He slowly strides out from behind the backstage curtain, dressed in an EWE Shop promotional t-shirt and a pair of dark jeans, looking around at the people while a red spotlight illuminates him. He stands on the stage and picks out every booing fan, gritting his teeth with a sigh as he slowly walks down the ramp. It was a house show, and it was of no consequence: less than a thousand people, and they were all bored out of their minds with some lackluster matches, which accounted for some of the booing, but Wrestlemania made up for some of the others. As Ceno walks up the steel steps, he feels an aluminum can hit him between the shoulders; it wasn’t opened either. It was a good shot too, hitting him square in the back. He stops for a second as security goes to escort the troublemaker from the building, but he no-sells the ache in his back as he gets between the ropes and paces the ring. He pulls a mic out from the waistband of his jeans, and he lifts the mic to his lips.~

JC: First thing’s first: that little bastard that nailed me with the pop can, it wasn’t a bad shot. If I had been facing you, I’d have caught it and put it through your head. Have fun waiting for your friends outside, if you have any.

~The fans don’t react, nonplussed about the whole thing. They start chanting “What the fuck”.~

JC: What? Are you expecting something from me?

Fans: What?

JC: Am I here to amuse you?

Fans: What?

JC: I can only imagine what you think I have to offer you with who I’m going to call out for being nothing more than a little bitch.

~The fans start cheering a bit, but it’s nothing significant.~

JC: Big Rig Dick Prickson, I couldn’t help taking some time looking through YouTube, and I found your Wrestlemania promo. What a shock I had to find that my whole segment to interrupt your little bitch session was removed from the video. It was on the EWE Official channel too, and lo and behold: there was nothing of me dumping a good helping of the same shit you spew every night, which you put these poor fans through every God damned day you come to the ring.

~The fans start to cheer a bit more as Ceno lets his filter down.~

JC: Word on the street is that you took your cunty little ass to Jensen’s office and started to bitch and moan about how I mistreated your character. Wow, and you call yourself a man? You sound more like the baby-back butt fucker you really are, and your butt buddy must be that guy in the mask too. It was a gimp mask too, wasn’t it? Then again, should any of us be surprised that the big guy who’s trying to be all tough and muscular and randomly beating up other wrestlers can’t face up and deal with a real competitor? You don’t know what it’s like to be in a big match, and I can promise you that you squander every opportunity presented to you. Impressive debut? I watched your match. It was the Money in the Bank Invitational Qualifier.

~Ceno takes two steps off his mark and looks at the fans, and they start to chant his name. He smirks and shakes his head, signalling to the fans to keep it down.~

JC: Don’t worry, I’ve got more, and it’s that, Big Tick, you’re nothing more than a cog meant to turn the rotisserie in a smoker. You’re nothing more than some child hired to turn the spit over an open fire. You’re just the guy who gets fucked in the ass by the cook’s assistant while you are trying to wash dishes in the chuck wagon. You, Big Rig, are nothing more than a wannabe big man who knows nothing about what it takes to be a big man. You don’t even have the intestinal fortitude to call me out properly. You don’t even have the mental capacity to understand anything I just said: because you’re too stupid! You don’t have the balls to face me like a real man should. I’m sure you’ll try to come back at me, try to make me out to be a homosexual because I used “balls” and “real man” in the same sentence, but it only goes to prove how much of a redneck bitch you really are. You want to complain about being caked in shit? How about you take a fucking bath, clean up your disastrously bullshit in-ring ability, and take your ass to a wrestling school so that you can be shown how a real wrestler performs in the ring? You remind me of the Ultimate Warrior:

~Ceno takes a breath, taking his mouth away from the mic to look at the fans, before lifting it back up to his lips.~

JC: When it comes to the wrestling business and the life we live now, you’re better off dead.

~Ceno drops the mic and gets out of the ring, walking up the ramp in an authoritative strut before disappearing behind the curtain.~