Lazlo Falconi
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Lazlo Falconi
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Joined: September 16th, 2013, 4:27 am

June 16th, 2016, 3:31 am #21

This is the longest game of Pokemon ever! A new world record!
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Joined: November 20th, 2006, 6:23 pm

June 19th, 2016, 6:44 am #22

[spoiler=Part 7: The Lightning American?]Last time we went on a boat and learned the miraculous ability to cut things.
That however, is completely unrelated to what happens next: catching new pokemon.

On route 9 we encounter this ominous bird that just.. stand there and stares. Constantly. Unblinking. Forever.

This filthy crouton gets caught easily with usual Yeast shenanigans.

In this cave we encounter a disgusting creature

ew, go away.

Now with the newfound discovery to cut things the shrub tree blocking the gym provides no trouble as Yeast simply clips it in two with it's claw.

First up in the gym is this boy-scout

..and his terrifying friend.

Cake just stomps all over it because crabs have no fear.

Next up was this shirtless guy. He had nothing of interest.
Suddenly the urge to catch pokemon beckons. Back to Saffron city to take on another route.

Now, who will we encounter at route 8?

Oh my god, WANT!

It at first appears to be a pretty straight forward catch..

But then it decides to be incredibly annoying. Took about 5 or so tries to finally catch it.

This description actually sounds fairly accurate for this one

When in doubt call 'em Cornbread.
onto route 7.

Where we encounter something spooky.

Luckily Yeast weakens it enough before getting put to sleep by this thing's hauntingly mesmerizing eyes.

Once again: Yes, this is a thing.

It's a cool pokemon, has a great typing, well rounded stats, and some pretty decent moves. Not bad, not bad at all. Welcome to the team, Blaa.
Well, since we're already on the way there we might as well visit celadon.

Home of people who think they are frogs.
Celadon's an alright place but it doesn't have much that interests us right now. Rye however does feel drawn to head to a certain apartment building for some reason..

Not through the front of course but through an ominously secret back entrance full of nothing but seemingly endless stairs. Up and up the stairs go, the surroundings getting more and more quiet as we proceed until all background noise of the potential residents cease altogether. Near the top one even gets the sense that reality itself has been distorting around them. Finally after what felt like an entire half hour of climbing stairs the we at last find a door.

The door to domain of the great one. The creature considers bestowing upon us unfathomable cosmic knowledge upon Rye but then.. takes a look at them and wisely decides that it would be entirely too much for them. But anyway, upon the table lies a gift.

It is complete garbage

So much hate. Into the box for eternity.
Since Rye's attention has already been completely broken i guess it's time to backtrack aimlessly.

So we get a thing from one of Oak's nuns. No i don't know why he has nuns.

We also encounter a guy who got attacked by a Drowzee

He gives us something worth less than garbage..
In pewter city the accursed skinny trees that were just outright impossible to navigate through despite their pathetic girth and stature are now no match for the miraculous invention of cutting things! This now leaves the an alternate entrance to the museum open.

Here we find a base of a cult that calls themselves "Twitchplays" a bunch of crazed idiots who worship a helix fossil. They also have a coming of age ceremony wherein they pump their children with several hallucinogenic drugs and then blindfold them as they send them out on a journey where every member of the clan shouts conflicting directions at them. it's very depressing to watch.

Here we find a undercover member of the Kanto Archaeological Society who slips us a fossil preserved in old amber which the cultists apparently claimed was "the mirror of the great one".
Now finally, back to the gym.

um.. excuse me miss where is the… "*sigh* he's plannning a "surprise attack" from the trash can again"

Oh um.. wow.. he's really let himself go.

But despite his appearance he's arguable better than ever.. o.o; this Zweilous is tough one that can hit fairly hard and can withstand even Cake easily. It is revealed that infect even Lt. surge's new appearance was a ruse as he takes off his fat-suit and fake beard.
"Greatest weapon in war is surprise, kid!(well, that and a Voltorb firing bazooka..)"

This beast is so tough that i even had to use a potion just to keep Cake alive!

Fortunately, even two headed dragons flinch at Cake's gross crab legs touching it. This allows Cake to finish it off without a scratch now!

As usual he gives us a T.M.



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Joined: August 30th, 2005, 2:57 pm

June 19th, 2016, 6:13 pm #23

Haha, that Twitch joke is great.


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Joined: November 20th, 2006, 6:23 pm

July 6th, 2016, 12:41 am #24

[spoiler=Part 8: Onslaught]Last time we got a badge. This time we head right and- "HOLD IT, PUNK!"

Oh great, it's you again
"THIS TIME I SHALLZ GET MY REVENGSH!!!11" she says as she sends out actually intimidating pokemon.

The Gliscor prepares an attack but gets mesmerized into a trance in the middle of it by Blaa's hauntingly hypnotic eyes. Blaa then proceeds to consume it's delicious dreams twice to finish it.
After being defeated once again Lorelei shreiks and frustration and leaps into the bushes. …i will never understand what is up with her.
Well, time to move on along the route.

Here we encounter a ..Cheif?

A dead child

Cool looking jousting snail things.


She hastily sends out a tiny bird. Poor thing didn't know what hit them.

Next she sends out the horrific tongue abomination. Fortunately, i have my own horror now whom proceeds to consume the Lickilicky's hopes and dreams.
As usual she shrieks in frustration and leaves.

….but then immediately turns back around and rushes at Rye, taking two pokeballs out of her overstuffed purse. "NO! I'M NOT DONE WITH YOU YET, PUNK!! I'LL USE AS MANY POKEMON AS IT TAKES UNTIL YOU ARE CRUSHED, DEFEATED , AND HUMILIATED LIKE ME!!!! >=E"

Her first pokemon is… wait seriously? needless to say, this little bug never stood a chance.

Her next pokemon is equally pathetic. Sertioulsy, why would you send that out?
""I STILL WON;T RELENT!! AS I SAID I'LL KEEP THROWING STUFF AT YOU UNTIL SOMETHING WORKS!" she rummages through her bag for several minutes and comes out empty handed
Lorelei falls asleep in the middle of her rant after a few seconds of Blaa staring at her.

We also encounter this weird deer. It's not significant but just felt like pointing it out. I don't like itt very much. The other deer are much better.

We also encounter someone laying down some electrical cables while.. on a bike?

They actually turn out to be Lt. Surge!?
"Never let your guard down, soldier!"

He just sends out this harmles little bird.
"Heh, just kidding kid." Oh, Surge.
after defeating the bird and bidding the vermillion gym leader a friendly farewell surge interrupts Rye as they are about to walk away.

"..OR WAS I!? Hah! Did you really think i'd let you get off so easy? Here's your last test, kid!"

aw shit. His first pokemon is a scary squid

Fortunately it spends most of it's time unsuccesfully trying to confuse Blaa and gets taken down in two shadow sneaks.

Next he sends out um…? I'm not quite sure actually..

It's sturdy but lacks in power so yeast just poisons it while slowly leeching off it. Adorable.

Last but not least is the mighty derpfish! Flats mind-crushes it without much trouble.
with that, Lt. surge gives us a jolly farewell saying that he now knows we can make it out there and thus we move further along the route.

Where we encounter the unlosing man.

He uses this… *sigh* everyone who actually hangs around this route sucks then.

A mienfoo would be pretty great actually..

Sadly we do not have any penguins to trade.
Turns out there isn't much else to do here right now as the route is a dead so Rye backtracks all the way back to cerulean. To head onto route 9

Here we find a oddly normal-ish but mostly useless T.M.

We also encounter lots of those awful scantily clad buff men hiding in clefairy outfits.. ugh..

Gary please.. just go home already. Once again he halfheartedly threw out nothing significant
Now to see what we can catch next

Damnit. Even more annoyingly we couldn't even catch the little guy as backup since this douche just teleports immediately!
Suddenly we are accosted by Gary again except now.. he seems oddly different..

"…alright enough slacking. For the past while i've become disillusioned and lost sight of a reason to fight but you.. after seeing you battle many trainers while passing by I saw a certain fire in your eyes.. a fire that reminds me of HIM! I was once at the top of the world but then after suffering defeat after defeat i sunk to where i am now.. BUT NO MORE! I remember why i must train to go stronger now, to finally beat HIM!! NOW YOU SHALL FACE THE MIGHT OF THE FORMER CHAMPION!!"
..holy shit he's back

First off he starts off with.. freaking Entei!
"Heh, surprised? Took chasing this guy all throughout the johto region thrice over but in the end i finally got him."

Brioche gives Entei a hug and suddenly the legendary beast just doesn't have the heart to unleash it's full power on the blob. Brioche then sludge's it twice to defeat him.

Next, Gary sends out a Lanturn. We respond in turn with Flour.

It does some decent damage but Flour endures it to go for another takedown, ending the fish.

Gary's third pokemon is a mighty Vileplume. We ofcourse switch to our cold steel companion, Flats to take it down.

It never stood a chance as Flats gives it a mindcrush

Gary's final pokemon is a simple larvitar. Uh.. it's part dark right? Yeast should be able to do this right?

It turns out I- I mean err.. that dumbass Rye ofcourse had a brainfart and forgot it only gets the dark typing in it's final form. It threw some rocks which hurt Yeast a lot and it was scary so we send out something scarier.

Blaa confuses it and takes it down with a sneak attack.(shadow sneak)
"Heh, impressive.. Maybe next time maybe i won't have to use my old gym leader power limiter! Well smell ya later! I'm going to have to train much harder to beat Red.." Gary says, indicating a small device on his pokeball throwing arm used to lower the power of one's pokemon to provide more even ground for the opponent.

Anyway, after fighting through more weirdos we eventually reach route 10 and find a convenient buff center to heal up in!

Also, new pokemon. It's a pig with a pearl on it's head, what else do you expect me to say?

Yeast gets it with the ol' one-two of paralysis+scratch and it gets caught easily in one go.

Because it's bouncy

Anyway, after catching our new friend that we will probably never use Rye stumbles into a dark cave where they clumsily trip over themselves into a random encounter and sends out the wrong pokemon first.

Ugh, terrible poser. not even worth a pokeball.

So Yeast just cuts it to pieces.

Sorry, but someone has to do it and musharna actually doesn't learn very many moves anyway..

Since Yeast has kind of fallen off as a combatant and has become more of a capturer for our growing legion in the box he will be staying behind for the venture into the ever ominous Rock Tunnel.[/spoiler]


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Joined: November 20th, 2006, 6:23 pm

August 31st, 2016, 10:53 pm #25

So, never trust me when i mention keeping to any kind of schedule apparently. Just hard to get into the mood for it lately, really and i've been kind of been struggling with the games material and trying not to make it bland and repetitive so yeah. I do want to finish this before sun & moon comes out and makes pretty much everything irrelevant though so expect updates maybe more often.(which should likely happen as there aren't very many level and progress gaps between the next few gyms in kanto. Though honestly the material the game has been giving me lately almost makes me wish it'd spam lorelei again XD)
[spoiler=Part 9: The cave of the damned]

Before heading out though, Rye decides to be smart for once and backtrack to Saffron in order to get some supplies for the journey.

Shortly after entering we get attacked by a mystery man on a bike who's probably something wacky

oh.. huh, he actually is a biker.

He sends out.. …. WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT!?
It looks weird but doesn't do much. His other thing isn't very impressive either.
So, we move further into the cave..

…of the damned. Where we encounter soul sucking horrors

grumpy Umbreons


o-ok, after running away from THAT and battling through several biker gang members who seem to have made this cave their "base" of sorts, we finally encounter something not scary for once. I have never been so glad to see a boring normal/flying type in my life.

This is very fitting considering the next i mean-err.. I KNOW NOTHING OF FUTURE EVENTS.

aww one of these bikers is really just a big softy at heart.

As well as the biker gang, the cave ninja clan dwells here. they're.. not very good.

oh and a angry rocket-cocoon tries to ram us because well, everything in this cave has to be incredibly hostile ofcourse

… oh god. We find a whole group of these creeps just hanging around probably planning to do awful things..

Fortunately a majestic Dunsparce appears to encourage us onward!

The creepy "swimmers" here aren't messing around but fortunately neither are we.

HOLY SHIT, IT'S PIKABLUE! The legends were true!

Rye is also accosted by this creep. HELP


Cake takes the creep's beast out with a single blow from a claw as hard as steel. Awesome

Aw crap
"Behold. I am Mewtwo"

Blaa takes the mighty mewtwo out with.. just a shadow sneak? um..? well.. that was anticlimactic.
"Oh noooo. how could i be defeated? I'm mewtwo by the way!" he says as he collapses' dropping his mewtwo sign in the process. Turns out it was just some average person. huh..


The team took qute a bit of a beating through this trip to the point where we've had to use several potions

Another "swimmer" sends out.. the mighty zygarde?
"..I've been desperate since Pokemon Z stopped being a thing ok?"

He's an annoying paralyzing jerk but anpan manages to get it with a psybeam in the end

And now we're all out of potions..

Next up we find a ninja who sends out freaking Suicune!

Blaa then proceeds to never attack ever because it can't deal with some mild paralysis and stuff. …Blaa, i fucking hate you.

So ofcourse anpan has to do all the work.

Also steel penguins are rampant on top of everything else in this cave

At last we finally reach it to the safety that is outside and a guy who doesn't know that munna exists. Finally, no more-


He sends out.. a weapon to surpass metal gear!?

Flour however is still the best deer and takes it out in one flying jumpkick.

next time: spooktown.[/spoiler]