EPISODE #7: THE INCREDIBLE SHRINKING TURTLES
We open the episode with the Turtles sparring in the park, trying to practice fighting in a different environment in the event of another battle with Shredder, which no doubt will end in a Dusty Finish. Suddenly, SHREDDER ATTACKS! Donatello, Leonardo, and Raphael seem oblivious to the face that Shredder is not only partially dressed, but also appears to have GREEN SKIN and has Orange elbow and knee wraps. Oh, it's Michelangelo playing a prank on them. Wow, that fooled me. Suddenly, a SPACESHIP crashes into the... lake? River? The Turtles save him, only for him to expire after telling them about The Eye of Zarnoth. It's broken into three pieces, and when joined, they have the power of creative control. Shredder, of course, over hears the entire conversation, despite the dying alien being whisper quiet.
Shredder, Baxter Stockman, and Baxter Stockman's melting ice cream cone try pleading with Krang to send reinforcements, but Krang demands Shredder win on his own for once. Was this the creative team's inspiration for booking Randy Orton as the "face of WWE" in the Fall of 2013? The Turtles find fragment #1: In a Dump. Shredder swings in from what appears to be a 500 foot rope and easily kicks Donatello's ass... literally. Shredder makes short work of the remaining Turtles and the fragment of the Eye of Zarnoth has the ability to SHRINK THINGS, making all four Turtles almost microscopic. Even being about 5 inches tall, or big enough to be one of the countless action figures produced by PlayMates from 1987-1997, the Turtles still won't job to Shredder. They take the cop-out Count-Out finish, instead.
(Right in the ass)
Shredder uses the "alien crystal" to shrink down buildings in New York City, including the Empire State Building. Something inside me doesn't think he knows where he's going with this plan. After showing off his collection, Krang simply ridicules Shredder and hangs up on him. Meanwhile, the Turtles chow down on a single slice of pizza (because they're so tiny!) and save themselves from a "tidal wave" by riding a bar of soap (because they're so tiny!). Baxter Stockman manages to capture the Turtles (because WCW) which can only mean one thing: Another failed plot from Shredder at destroying the Turtles. Remember, we're PG: You can't say kill, you have to say "destroy" or "eliminate." Splinter runs in for the save, only to get his rodent ass handed to him. The Turtles return to their normal size, make the save for Splinter, and Shredder runs off with the crystal... but WHAT ABOUT THE OTHER TWO FRAGMENTS?!