Boundaries

Boundaries

Joined: April 12th, 2008, 1:18 am

May 25th, 2008, 4:20 am #1

I have a problem that I need some advice on. I just started as a CNA in a local Nursing Home. I love my job, I love working with the residents.

My problem is how the residents treat ME. I read a lot of articles about CNA's treatment of the resident and I work hard to make my residents comfortable, feel cared for and clean.

I expect some challenges and overcoming abuse, and I have not been disappointed. I have a great deal of patience for those who are confused, has Alzheimer's or dementia. However my patience is strained when residents who are alert and not terribly disabled. Being bossed around, called names, and the call light being pushed at least 6 times in one shift.

The other night one resident called me 'stupid', 'I didn't do it like the worker in the day'. It got to the point she was screaming I was hurting her (which of course was not true) Finally I put down whatever it was I was holding, I looked at the woman in the eye. I told her in my mother stern voice, "I am a certified nurse's assistant, I am not your personal maid. I will help you and make you as comfortable as I can. I will not accept this behavior any longer."

At first it was a power struggle. But after standing firm she tried to intimidate me, I looked at her straight in the eye and repeated what I said. Things calmed down quite a bit after that.

She said.. "You are usually so nice."

"I am a nice person, but I can't let you treat me like that. I don't think you'd like it if anyone did that to you."

Ok, questions. Can anyone share their experiences and what they did?

Thank you

Dawn
Quote
Like
Share

Joined: February 13th, 2004, 5:08 pm

May 25th, 2008, 1:03 pm #2

You'll get a variety of responses. IMHO, EXACTLY the correct response....

Remember, it's not only the dementia that will create issues. You have the mentally 'alert' people in there who resent being there (for various reasons --- people are people) and you are the only one they can take frustrations out on. But, of course, you cannot do your job and tolerate 'bad behavior'.

You took, what I think, is an appropriate, professional, response.
Quote
Like
Share

dl
dl

May 25th, 2008, 5:21 pm #3

I have a problem that I need some advice on. I just started as a CNA in a local Nursing Home. I love my job, I love working with the residents.

My problem is how the residents treat ME. I read a lot of articles about CNA's treatment of the resident and I work hard to make my residents comfortable, feel cared for and clean.

I expect some challenges and overcoming abuse, and I have not been disappointed. I have a great deal of patience for those who are confused, has Alzheimer's or dementia. However my patience is strained when residents who are alert and not terribly disabled. Being bossed around, called names, and the call light being pushed at least 6 times in one shift.

The other night one resident called me 'stupid', 'I didn't do it like the worker in the day'. It got to the point she was screaming I was hurting her (which of course was not true) Finally I put down whatever it was I was holding, I looked at the woman in the eye. I told her in my mother stern voice, "I am a certified nurse's assistant, I am not your personal maid. I will help you and make you as comfortable as I can. I will not accept this behavior any longer."

At first it was a power struggle. But after standing firm she tried to intimidate me, I looked at her straight in the eye and repeated what I said. Things calmed down quite a bit after that.

She said.. "You are usually so nice."

"I am a nice person, but I can't let you treat me like that. I don't think you'd like it if anyone did that to you."

Ok, questions. Can anyone share their experiences and what they did?

Thank you

Dawn
The new one always gets that kind of treatment- Just smile, be polite- and do your best- sooner or later you will win them over- Remember most likely they don't want to be there- maybe they don't get many visitors- take time to get to know that resident- ask questions about their past- some loves to talk about their past- some don't- Don't let the call lighters get to you- have a sense of humor-
Quote
Share

Danny
Danny

May 26th, 2008, 9:10 pm #4

I have a problem that I need some advice on. I just started as a CNA in a local Nursing Home. I love my job, I love working with the residents.

My problem is how the residents treat ME. I read a lot of articles about CNA's treatment of the resident and I work hard to make my residents comfortable, feel cared for and clean.

I expect some challenges and overcoming abuse, and I have not been disappointed. I have a great deal of patience for those who are confused, has Alzheimer's or dementia. However my patience is strained when residents who are alert and not terribly disabled. Being bossed around, called names, and the call light being pushed at least 6 times in one shift.

The other night one resident called me 'stupid', 'I didn't do it like the worker in the day'. It got to the point she was screaming I was hurting her (which of course was not true) Finally I put down whatever it was I was holding, I looked at the woman in the eye. I told her in my mother stern voice, "I am a certified nurse's assistant, I am not your personal maid. I will help you and make you as comfortable as I can. I will not accept this behavior any longer."

At first it was a power struggle. But after standing firm she tried to intimidate me, I looked at her straight in the eye and repeated what I said. Things calmed down quite a bit after that.

She said.. "You are usually so nice."

"I am a nice person, but I can't let you treat me like that. I don't think you'd like it if anyone did that to you."

Ok, questions. Can anyone share their experiences and what they did?

Thank you

Dawn
Hi dawn,

I feel you!!! There are those times when enough is enough. You should always report what happened to your nurse and always always always when something like this happens write a statement with the date and time of exactly what happened and have your nurse sign it, keep a copy for yourself and give a copy to the nursing home. CYA as we say. Residents in LTC will be the first ones to lie on you and cost you your job. Also keep in mind though that this is nursing and sometimes we just do what we have to to make our patients happy.
Take care and good luck.

Danny.
Quote
Share

Joined: September 4th, 2007, 12:39 pm

June 8th, 2008, 3:42 am #5

I have a problem that I need some advice on. I just started as a CNA in a local Nursing Home. I love my job, I love working with the residents.

My problem is how the residents treat ME. I read a lot of articles about CNA's treatment of the resident and I work hard to make my residents comfortable, feel cared for and clean.

I expect some challenges and overcoming abuse, and I have not been disappointed. I have a great deal of patience for those who are confused, has Alzheimer's or dementia. However my patience is strained when residents who are alert and not terribly disabled. Being bossed around, called names, and the call light being pushed at least 6 times in one shift.

The other night one resident called me 'stupid', 'I didn't do it like the worker in the day'. It got to the point she was screaming I was hurting her (which of course was not true) Finally I put down whatever it was I was holding, I looked at the woman in the eye. I told her in my mother stern voice, "I am a certified nurse's assistant, I am not your personal maid. I will help you and make you as comfortable as I can. I will not accept this behavior any longer."

At first it was a power struggle. But after standing firm she tried to intimidate me, I looked at her straight in the eye and repeated what I said. Things calmed down quite a bit after that.

She said.. "You are usually so nice."

"I am a nice person, but I can't let you treat me like that. I don't think you'd like it if anyone did that to you."

Ok, questions. Can anyone share their experiences and what they did?

Thank you

Dawn
This is what works for me:

go to this site:

http://www.merriam-webster.com/

enter the word "sympathy" (save this for your family)
enter the word "empathy" (makes you a better healthcare worker)

memorize the definitions

peace always,

xtech64
Quote
Like
Share