Brief Reviews of Films You've Seen Recently

the non-horror, non-monsters kind!

Brief Reviews of Films You've Seen Recently

Spivsy
Cosmic Horror
Spivsy
Cosmic Horror
Joined: 16 Jun 2009, 19:12

27 Jan 2012, 19:26 #1

I just watched Hollow Point. The back of the dvd said 'Susan snaps. Trying to rid herself of her persecutor, she buys a handgun. No longer unarmed and in danger, Susan is now armed and dangerous'. The front said 'He had his chance to kill her. Now it's her turn.' Turns out, that was complete bullshit.
She spends 80 minutes doing shit all but shiver in terror, then sits in the dark and shoots the wrong guy. The cops get the right guy, and it ends. It wasn't that bad, but they didn't have to lie!

TYO
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xolta
Outer Godling
xolta
Outer Godling
Joined: 23 Dec 2009, 04:48

27 Jan 2012, 21:16 #2

I saw real steal wich was a family movie at the dallor store a little over a week ago. Its a solid decent family film. If you know a kid that likes robots, rent it and they will like and it least you wont regret having been forced to watch it.
Curently banned for life for blockbuster and hollywood video
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Admiral_Aorta
Indescribable Monstrosity
Admiral_Aorta
Indescribable Monstrosity
Joined: 07 Apr 2009, 04:15

27 Jan 2012, 23:36 #3

Crossposting from the upcoming movies thread:
Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy is really great, though it's a very dense film that you have to pay close attention to. I feel as though it would benefit from a second viewing. The acting is top notch all round, with particularly impressive performances from Gary Oldman and Mark Strong. I also liked the cinematography, it evokes the 70s cold war atmosphere really well.
Bogleech is the cool place to hang out. You can find most of the cool people there. In Bogleech you can just chill and do whatever and totally relax. "Take it easy" is the Bogleech motto, for example, that's how laid back it is there. Show up if you want to have a good time. Another good reason to show up is if you want to hang out with friends.

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Brontozaurus
Elder Thing
Brontozaurus
Elder Thing
Joined: 24 Jun 2010, 07:16

28 Jan 2012, 04:34 #4

Hugo is misadvertised as fuck. It's not so much a kids film as it is Martin Scorcese saying LOOK HOW FUCKING AWESOME FILM IS. This is not a bad thing. Also the 3D is actually quite impressive.
They're all like "BASE STATS STAB RATING TYPE MATCHES EGG MOVES" and I'm all like "I like Magmar because it's a duck and it's on fire." -dodoman1

"This is what we've come to. Arguing about bath salts being released into the atmosphere." -Spivsy
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OuthouseInferno
Inconceivable Abomination
OuthouseInferno
Inconceivable Abomination
Joined: 07 Apr 2009, 06:21

28 Jan 2012, 18:57 #5

The last film I caught a glimpse of was Repo Men (2010).

I think I actually talked about it before but I'll say stuff again.

Don't watch it. It has nothing to do with Repo! The Genetic Opera aside from having organ-reclaiming repo men, but that's not the point. It's vaguely intriguing at first. It has a consistent level of sugical gore but don't let that fool you. Soon, it turns into boring fights and gunfightan, and then there's more than a few points where your intelligence gets incredibly insulted.

"I am of a different mind ten times in the course of a day. But I resist the devil, and often it is with a fart that I chase him away." -Martin Luther
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Arachnid knight
Elder Thing
Joined: 04 May 2009, 23:29

28 Jan 2012, 19:08 #6

Directed by the visual master, Tarsem, The Fall follows the life of a silent film stunt man who had shattered his leg during the titular fall off of a bridge.
Fearing the loss of his leg, and thereby, his job, and pairing this panic with depression brought on by his love leaving him for the leading man, he sinks into a deep depression.

He meets a Serbian girl in the hospital, whos parents were killed by raiders. She desperately attempts to save his soul, while he tells her stories, all of which are portrayed with masterfully beautiful directing. The locations of these stories are lush, varied, and as real as they come, this film taking pride in using NO cgi for any of the locations.

As amazing as the film is, it hits a depressing as hell sequence very close to the end of the film, but thanks to the little girl, we are rescued from bleak depression by her inspiring the crushed stuntman to see there is still hope and beauty on the world.

The ending works out quite well for everyone, without feeling ham-handed, and the sequences where the actor tells the story, while fairly cliched in its heroic tropes, is still astonishingly well done. I reccomend seeing it in blu-ray, or with your highest definiton television. The colors alone will melt your brain.
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dodoman1
Inconceivable Abomination
dodoman1
Inconceivable Abomination
Joined: 07 Apr 2009, 20:56

28 Jan 2012, 21:55 #7

I saw The Grey the other day. I don't have all that much to say about it other than these wolves are fucking ridiculous. But other than that it was generally inoffensive and fairly entertaining.
"Abominations, mutations, deviations... that's all you're gonna find down here."
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Arachnid knight
Elder Thing
Joined: 04 May 2009, 23:29

29 Jan 2012, 07:47 #8

I see the Gray as Liam Neeson, not satisfied with killing thirty men in Taken, has decided to murder NATURE ITSELF.
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Admiral_Aorta
Indescribable Monstrosity
Admiral_Aorta
Indescribable Monstrosity
Joined: 07 Apr 2009, 04:15

29 Jan 2012, 18:36 #9

From all I've heard, The Grey is actually a somber rumination on death and the wolf fighting is largely symbolic.
Bogleech is the cool place to hang out. You can find most of the cool people there. In Bogleech you can just chill and do whatever and totally relax. "Take it easy" is the Bogleech motto, for example, that's how laid back it is there. Show up if you want to have a good time. Another good reason to show up is if you want to hang out with friends.

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dodoman1
Inconceivable Abomination
dodoman1
Inconceivable Abomination
Joined: 07 Apr 2009, 20:56

29 Jan 2012, 19:16 #10

Admiral_Aorta @ Jan 29 2012, 01:36 PM wrote: From all I've heard, The Grey is actually a somber rumination on death and the wolf fighting is largely symbolic.
Yeah, it is.

If I had directed it I would have made it a Lord of the Flies-esque psychoanalysis of the human condition, showing how the "human pack" grew more similar to the wolf pack as they grew more desperate.
But they didn't ask me.
"Abominations, mutations, deviations... that's all you're gonna find down here."
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KDarkness
Indescribable Monstrosity
KDarkness
Indescribable Monstrosity
Joined: 10 Sep 2010, 02:11

04 Feb 2012, 04:21 #11

Just got back from seeing the new Woman in Black with Daniel Radcliffe.
First of all, if you go to see it, wait a while so you don't have to deal with idiotic middle and high school fucks who are all OMGEEZ HARRY POTTER. Trust me.

Okay, so, the movie pretty much met my expectations. It was a relatively decent horror film with a few cool scenes (Like a dead child crawling out of the marsh towards the house), some relatively predictable scares (And a few that aren't), and an ending that is sort of expected but at the same time not.
The movie follows a lawyer named Arthur Kipps who goes to a house in a village to settle the paperwork of the owner who just passed away. The plot and setting are lightly reminiscent of other works in that a man goes to an old village by the water and finds a secret is being actively kept from him by the village leaders, a secret that involves mysterious deaths.
The movie succeeds in creating a dark atmosphere around the aforementioned house, which is vital in any haunted house movie. The movie also has no qualms about revealing and showing its titular antagonist, which causes the movie's environment of suspense to rely not on brief glimpses of the woman in black, but rather her actions throughout the house and how they affect Kipps. Yes, there are still some brief scare shots, but they aren't what the movie relies on to be scary.

All in all, I would recommend this to anyone who enjoys classic haunted house movies. Yes, there is one or two slightly over the top scenes, and yes, the ending was slightly predictable, but I think it made up for it overall.
"Sometimes I think we'd all be better off without our organs; less heartache." - ScutigeraColeoptrata
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FILTHY_PEASANT
Nameless Spawn
FILTHY_PEASANT
Nameless Spawn
Joined: 08 Nov 2011, 03:38

09 Feb 2012, 05:59 #12

The Woman in Black

Slenderman's beloved wife kills kids, but then, she is interrupted by none other than Harry Potter! He uses his wizard powers to banish the phantom from the earth, but then he and his babby get hit by a train. Spoilers, I guess.

It was alright I guess, if you like jump-scares. And dead kids who are also jump-scares.
*~lil bitch~*
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xolta
Outer Godling
xolta
Outer Godling
Joined: 23 Dec 2009, 04:48

12 Feb 2012, 04:31 #13

I just wachted Gamera The Brave. While not as good as the Gamera guardian
of the universe series, its still good. It much more like the classic Gamera series in tone and feels like part loveing tribute part boy and his dog movie. Its a good light hearted movie. Also Toto gamera is super cute.
Curently banned for life for blockbuster and hollywood video
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KDarkness
Indescribable Monstrosity
KDarkness
Indescribable Monstrosity
Joined: 10 Sep 2010, 02:11

18 Feb 2012, 17:03 #14

The Rum Diary with Johnny Depp is a more serious and less hilariously entertaining version of Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. It has some moments, but still.
"Sometimes I think we'd all be better off without our organs; less heartache." - ScutigeraColeoptrata
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The Outsider
Indescribable Monstrosity
The Outsider
Indescribable Monstrosity
Joined: 25 May 2011, 17:10

18 Feb 2012, 22:20 #15

Saw Red Tails.

I think Ol' George spent all the innovation on having it be a primarily black movie, because in every other respect it is STRICTLY FORMULA.

"How formula was it?!?"

It was SO formula, I was surprised by the pilot with the callsign "Joker" making to the end of the movie alive!
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