Mondo.....

Mondo.....

Joined: March 8th, 2007, 6:53 am

February 3rd, 2011, 7:15 am #1

i wanted to thank you for being so kind to our friend Roy.

just wanted to say that.

g
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Joined: October 1st, 2006, 10:04 am

February 3rd, 2011, 10:41 am #2

In fact, it's VERY nice and thoughtful.

Mondo! Isn't that just so nice??


Love
Jackie









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Joined: May 4th, 2005, 1:31 pm

February 3rd, 2011, 4:59 pm #3

Can't tell if you are being sarcastic or not. Maybe a mix of sarcasm and sincerity. No reason for a person to thank another for their behaviour towards yet another. Much as I also think there is little or no reason for a person to criticize another for their behaviour towards yet another. Whatever is between X and me is between X and me. Be it seen as "good" or "bad" by others, especially those prone to inspect and scrutinize others.

Criticism and Praise are the Same
~Scott H Young

If you do anything unique, people will attack you for it. Self-motivation depends on having a thick skin, persisting in spite of criticism. But equally important is the ability to not let praise consume you, either. Because, praise and criticism are just reflections of each other.

In order to properly handle criticism, you also need to properly handle praise. If someone excessively flatters you for a minor success, you need to internalize it the same way you would internalize a scathing insult. The person that is easily flattered is also easily criticized.

Ultimately, only you can steer your life. If you allow yourself to be misled by attacks or flattery, you won't reach your destination.

The Problem with Praise

If someone congratulates you, by all means, thank them. Enjoy the fruits of your success. But if you fully embrace every piece of praise you receive, you open yourself to becoming overconfident. Additionally, since praise and criticism are equal partners, when you accept all praise without a thought, you expose yourself to criticism.

A friend of mine was also involved with the same new venture competitions I was this year. His team had a tremendous success at their first competition and he fully absorbed the praise that went with it. He was extremely confident and happy in his team's success.

However, at a later competition, when his team did not perform as well, he was crushed. I feel his unguarded acceptance of all praise in the first victory is what opened him to deeper criticism later.

Internalizing praise can lower your motivation to work hard just as much as criticism. While some minor critiques encourage improvement, excessive flattery promotes laziness. Instead of working hard to constantly improve, it is just easier to rest and enjoy the congratulations of people around you.

Stop Caring What Other People Think of You

The solution, both to prevent the excesses of praise and the humiliation of criticism, is to stop caring what other people think of you. Take what is actionable from their feedback and ignore the rest. Since you are the sole captain of your life, don't allow others to steer the ship.

If I write an article, I generally receive a mix of positive comments and negative comments. For criticism, I seek out any actionable suggestions from their comments. If someone notes that I made a grammatical mistake in an article, I'll happily correct it. Or, if someone feels the logic of my argument was weak, I can make efforts to correct it in a future discussion of the topic.

For praise, I take a similar approach. I thank the person for their comment, and see if there is anything actionable from their suggestion. If several people enjoyed a topic, I'll know it is something readers are interested in and worth discussing again.

What I strive not to do, with both praise and criticism, is to let it get under my skin. If someone writes an attack on my writing, I'll remind myself that this comment is just a small pebble on my course, and not to allow it to derail me. Similarly, if I get a piece of praise, I'll remind myself that this is just one view, and not to let it distract me from the bigger goal.

Start Caring What You Think of Yourself

Far more important than praise or criticism is what you think of yourself. I don't care if I'm receiving thousands of words of praise or attacks, if I know that what I'm doing doesn't reflect my true goals or values, I won't be happy. Start caring what you think of yourself, because you are the one that has to look in the mirror each day.

In running this business, I need to constantly ask myself whether what I'm doing is aligned with my goals. Do my daily actions reflect my short and long-term goals for the website? Am I writing content that delivers deeper value, or is it just self-help infocrack that gains popularity but provides no substance?

Praise and criticism can't answer those questions, only you can. Which is why you need to listen to yourself above everyone else.

Listening to yourself first isn't arrogant. You are the only person that intimately understands your goals and values. You are the one who set the goals in the first place. So, how can you expect other people, with different motives, to give you the ideal feedback to move forward?

Other people can offer great advice. But the emotional impact of praise and criticism should come from yourself. Other people can offer actionable suggestions, but they can't be the judge of your self-worth.

Humble Confidence

The ideal state of mind is humble confidence. You are humble, because you accept all feedback, searching for actionable suggestions, open to any opportunity. You are confident because you won't allow emotional praise or criticism to distract you from your goals.

In practice, it is impossible to maintain this state perfectly. I'm human like everyone else, so when I am insulted, I'll feel bad about that. When I'm praised, I'll feel happy. Those instincts won't go away.

However, if you accept those first impressions, but don't let them gnaw at your conscious self-image, you've succeeded. You can feel hurt from an insult, but you can evaluate the attack afterward and prevent it from wounding you. This is similar to the Stoic idea that nothing is good or bad, except in the mind. You may be forced to have a first impression from criticism or flattery, but you can then re-evaluate that so it doesn't distract you from your goals.

If people praise you, thank them and focus on your goal. If people criticize you, thank them and focus on your goal. Because, in the end, your the one who has to judge yourself and live with it.
Last edited by Oscar50 on February 3rd, 2011, 5:18 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Joined: May 4th, 2005, 1:31 pm

February 3rd, 2011, 5:00 pm #4

i wanted to thank you for being so kind to our friend Roy.

just wanted to say that.

g
Not sure why anyone would not be nice to Roy.

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Joined: May 4th, 2005, 1:31 pm

February 3rd, 2011, 6:48 pm #5

Can't tell if you are being sarcastic or not. Maybe a mix of sarcasm and sincerity. No reason for a person to thank another for their behaviour towards yet another. Much as I also think there is little or no reason for a person to criticize another for their behaviour towards yet another. Whatever is between X and me is between X and me. Be it seen as "good" or "bad" by others, especially those prone to inspect and scrutinize others.

Criticism and Praise are the Same
~Scott H Young

If you do anything unique, people will attack you for it. Self-motivation depends on having a thick skin, persisting in spite of criticism. But equally important is the ability to not let praise consume you, either. Because, praise and criticism are just reflections of each other.

In order to properly handle criticism, you also need to properly handle praise. If someone excessively flatters you for a minor success, you need to internalize it the same way you would internalize a scathing insult. The person that is easily flattered is also easily criticized.

Ultimately, only you can steer your life. If you allow yourself to be misled by attacks or flattery, you won't reach your destination.

The Problem with Praise

If someone congratulates you, by all means, thank them. Enjoy the fruits of your success. But if you fully embrace every piece of praise you receive, you open yourself to becoming overconfident. Additionally, since praise and criticism are equal partners, when you accept all praise without a thought, you expose yourself to criticism.

A friend of mine was also involved with the same new venture competitions I was this year. His team had a tremendous success at their first competition and he fully absorbed the praise that went with it. He was extremely confident and happy in his team's success.

However, at a later competition, when his team did not perform as well, he was crushed. I feel his unguarded acceptance of all praise in the first victory is what opened him to deeper criticism later.

Internalizing praise can lower your motivation to work hard just as much as criticism. While some minor critiques encourage improvement, excessive flattery promotes laziness. Instead of working hard to constantly improve, it is just easier to rest and enjoy the congratulations of people around you.

Stop Caring What Other People Think of You

The solution, both to prevent the excesses of praise and the humiliation of criticism, is to stop caring what other people think of you. Take what is actionable from their feedback and ignore the rest. Since you are the sole captain of your life, don't allow others to steer the ship.

If I write an article, I generally receive a mix of positive comments and negative comments. For criticism, I seek out any actionable suggestions from their comments. If someone notes that I made a grammatical mistake in an article, I'll happily correct it. Or, if someone feels the logic of my argument was weak, I can make efforts to correct it in a future discussion of the topic.

For praise, I take a similar approach. I thank the person for their comment, and see if there is anything actionable from their suggestion. If several people enjoyed a topic, I'll know it is something readers are interested in and worth discussing again.

What I strive not to do, with both praise and criticism, is to let it get under my skin. If someone writes an attack on my writing, I'll remind myself that this comment is just a small pebble on my course, and not to allow it to derail me. Similarly, if I get a piece of praise, I'll remind myself that this is just one view, and not to let it distract me from the bigger goal.

Start Caring What You Think of Yourself

Far more important than praise or criticism is what you think of yourself. I don't care if I'm receiving thousands of words of praise or attacks, if I know that what I'm doing doesn't reflect my true goals or values, I won't be happy. Start caring what you think of yourself, because you are the one that has to look in the mirror each day.

In running this business, I need to constantly ask myself whether what I'm doing is aligned with my goals. Do my daily actions reflect my short and long-term goals for the website? Am I writing content that delivers deeper value, or is it just self-help infocrack that gains popularity but provides no substance?

Praise and criticism can't answer those questions, only you can. Which is why you need to listen to yourself above everyone else.

Listening to yourself first isn't arrogant. You are the only person that intimately understands your goals and values. You are the one who set the goals in the first place. So, how can you expect other people, with different motives, to give you the ideal feedback to move forward?

Other people can offer great advice. But the emotional impact of praise and criticism should come from yourself. Other people can offer actionable suggestions, but they can't be the judge of your self-worth.

Humble Confidence

The ideal state of mind is humble confidence. You are humble, because you accept all feedback, searching for actionable suggestions, open to any opportunity. You are confident because you won't allow emotional praise or criticism to distract you from your goals.

In practice, it is impossible to maintain this state perfectly. I'm human like everyone else, so when I am insulted, I'll feel bad about that. When I'm praised, I'll feel happy. Those instincts won't go away.

However, if you accept those first impressions, but don't let them gnaw at your conscious self-image, you've succeeded. You can feel hurt from an insult, but you can evaluate the attack afterward and prevent it from wounding you. This is similar to the Stoic idea that nothing is good or bad, except in the mind. You may be forced to have a first impression from criticism or flattery, but you can then re-evaluate that so it doesn't distract you from your goals.

If people praise you, thank them and focus on your goal. If people criticize you, thank them and focus on your goal. Because, in the end, your the one who has to judge yourself and live with it.
He wrote:
. Because, in the end, your the one who has to judge yourself and live with it.

Not your. You're!!

What a maroon!!

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Joined: October 1st, 2006, 10:04 am

February 3rd, 2011, 6:53 pm #6

Can't tell if you are being sarcastic or not. Maybe a mix of sarcasm and sincerity. No reason for a person to thank another for their behaviour towards yet another. Much as I also think there is little or no reason for a person to criticize another for their behaviour towards yet another. Whatever is between X and me is between X and me. Be it seen as "good" or "bad" by others, especially those prone to inspect and scrutinize others.

Criticism and Praise are the Same
~Scott H Young

If you do anything unique, people will attack you for it. Self-motivation depends on having a thick skin, persisting in spite of criticism. But equally important is the ability to not let praise consume you, either. Because, praise and criticism are just reflections of each other.

In order to properly handle criticism, you also need to properly handle praise. If someone excessively flatters you for a minor success, you need to internalize it the same way you would internalize a scathing insult. The person that is easily flattered is also easily criticized.

Ultimately, only you can steer your life. If you allow yourself to be misled by attacks or flattery, you won't reach your destination.

The Problem with Praise

If someone congratulates you, by all means, thank them. Enjoy the fruits of your success. But if you fully embrace every piece of praise you receive, you open yourself to becoming overconfident. Additionally, since praise and criticism are equal partners, when you accept all praise without a thought, you expose yourself to criticism.

A friend of mine was also involved with the same new venture competitions I was this year. His team had a tremendous success at their first competition and he fully absorbed the praise that went with it. He was extremely confident and happy in his team's success.

However, at a later competition, when his team did not perform as well, he was crushed. I feel his unguarded acceptance of all praise in the first victory is what opened him to deeper criticism later.

Internalizing praise can lower your motivation to work hard just as much as criticism. While some minor critiques encourage improvement, excessive flattery promotes laziness. Instead of working hard to constantly improve, it is just easier to rest and enjoy the congratulations of people around you.

Stop Caring What Other People Think of You

The solution, both to prevent the excesses of praise and the humiliation of criticism, is to stop caring what other people think of you. Take what is actionable from their feedback and ignore the rest. Since you are the sole captain of your life, don't allow others to steer the ship.

If I write an article, I generally receive a mix of positive comments and negative comments. For criticism, I seek out any actionable suggestions from their comments. If someone notes that I made a grammatical mistake in an article, I'll happily correct it. Or, if someone feels the logic of my argument was weak, I can make efforts to correct it in a future discussion of the topic.

For praise, I take a similar approach. I thank the person for their comment, and see if there is anything actionable from their suggestion. If several people enjoyed a topic, I'll know it is something readers are interested in and worth discussing again.

What I strive not to do, with both praise and criticism, is to let it get under my skin. If someone writes an attack on my writing, I'll remind myself that this comment is just a small pebble on my course, and not to allow it to derail me. Similarly, if I get a piece of praise, I'll remind myself that this is just one view, and not to let it distract me from the bigger goal.

Start Caring What You Think of Yourself

Far more important than praise or criticism is what you think of yourself. I don't care if I'm receiving thousands of words of praise or attacks, if I know that what I'm doing doesn't reflect my true goals or values, I won't be happy. Start caring what you think of yourself, because you are the one that has to look in the mirror each day.

In running this business, I need to constantly ask myself whether what I'm doing is aligned with my goals. Do my daily actions reflect my short and long-term goals for the website? Am I writing content that delivers deeper value, or is it just self-help infocrack that gains popularity but provides no substance?

Praise and criticism can't answer those questions, only you can. Which is why you need to listen to yourself above everyone else.

Listening to yourself first isn't arrogant. You are the only person that intimately understands your goals and values. You are the one who set the goals in the first place. So, how can you expect other people, with different motives, to give you the ideal feedback to move forward?

Other people can offer great advice. But the emotional impact of praise and criticism should come from yourself. Other people can offer actionable suggestions, but they can't be the judge of your self-worth.

Humble Confidence

The ideal state of mind is humble confidence. You are humble, because you accept all feedback, searching for actionable suggestions, open to any opportunity. You are confident because you won't allow emotional praise or criticism to distract you from your goals.

In practice, it is impossible to maintain this state perfectly. I'm human like everyone else, so when I am insulted, I'll feel bad about that. When I'm praised, I'll feel happy. Those instincts won't go away.

However, if you accept those first impressions, but don't let them gnaw at your conscious self-image, you've succeeded. You can feel hurt from an insult, but you can evaluate the attack afterward and prevent it from wounding you. This is similar to the Stoic idea that nothing is good or bad, except in the mind. You may be forced to have a first impression from criticism or flattery, but you can then re-evaluate that so it doesn't distract you from your goals.

If people praise you, thank them and focus on your goal. If people criticize you, thank them and focus on your goal. Because, in the end, your the one who has to judge yourself and live with it.
Oh, I think you can. brother dear!

What about cheeky??

hey! Mondo a great article!

(Hey, down Bush boy, you reptoid worshipper. Go eat dirt..)



You know this is what I LOVE about the forums. I can go and make a dud post and from that comes a Great article!




Mondo...
Aboutt he Zohar post at The Star.
I am amazed!
I told you i was doing the Hebrew stuff, then a few days back I go into the loft library and yes, I took out of storage my Zohar volumes.
Those days with the Kabbalists stand out in my mind more than most.

I have listened to just a bit but I will listen to it all real soom.

I have connected with Yvonne at times with some of her observations.
With the Zohar, I am also with her.

Thanks to you both...



Love
Jackie


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Joined: May 4th, 2005, 1:31 pm

February 3rd, 2011, 7:13 pm #7

Light and ... cheek?

Well I NEVER!!

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Joined: October 1st, 2006, 10:04 am

February 3rd, 2011, 7:42 pm #8



Keep at it, kiddo!

Love n hugs and LOVE
Sis.
XX

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Joined: March 8th, 2007, 6:53 am

February 4th, 2011, 12:33 am #9

Can't tell if you are being sarcastic or not. Maybe a mix of sarcasm and sincerity. No reason for a person to thank another for their behaviour towards yet another. Much as I also think there is little or no reason for a person to criticize another for their behaviour towards yet another. Whatever is between X and me is between X and me. Be it seen as "good" or "bad" by others, especially those prone to inspect and scrutinize others.

Criticism and Praise are the Same
~Scott H Young

If you do anything unique, people will attack you for it. Self-motivation depends on having a thick skin, persisting in spite of criticism. But equally important is the ability to not let praise consume you, either. Because, praise and criticism are just reflections of each other.

In order to properly handle criticism, you also need to properly handle praise. If someone excessively flatters you for a minor success, you need to internalize it the same way you would internalize a scathing insult. The person that is easily flattered is also easily criticized.

Ultimately, only you can steer your life. If you allow yourself to be misled by attacks or flattery, you won't reach your destination.

The Problem with Praise

If someone congratulates you, by all means, thank them. Enjoy the fruits of your success. But if you fully embrace every piece of praise you receive, you open yourself to becoming overconfident. Additionally, since praise and criticism are equal partners, when you accept all praise without a thought, you expose yourself to criticism.

A friend of mine was also involved with the same new venture competitions I was this year. His team had a tremendous success at their first competition and he fully absorbed the praise that went with it. He was extremely confident and happy in his team's success.

However, at a later competition, when his team did not perform as well, he was crushed. I feel his unguarded acceptance of all praise in the first victory is what opened him to deeper criticism later.

Internalizing praise can lower your motivation to work hard just as much as criticism. While some minor critiques encourage improvement, excessive flattery promotes laziness. Instead of working hard to constantly improve, it is just easier to rest and enjoy the congratulations of people around you.

Stop Caring What Other People Think of You

The solution, both to prevent the excesses of praise and the humiliation of criticism, is to stop caring what other people think of you. Take what is actionable from their feedback and ignore the rest. Since you are the sole captain of your life, don't allow others to steer the ship.

If I write an article, I generally receive a mix of positive comments and negative comments. For criticism, I seek out any actionable suggestions from their comments. If someone notes that I made a grammatical mistake in an article, I'll happily correct it. Or, if someone feels the logic of my argument was weak, I can make efforts to correct it in a future discussion of the topic.

For praise, I take a similar approach. I thank the person for their comment, and see if there is anything actionable from their suggestion. If several people enjoyed a topic, I'll know it is something readers are interested in and worth discussing again.

What I strive not to do, with both praise and criticism, is to let it get under my skin. If someone writes an attack on my writing, I'll remind myself that this comment is just a small pebble on my course, and not to allow it to derail me. Similarly, if I get a piece of praise, I'll remind myself that this is just one view, and not to let it distract me from the bigger goal.

Start Caring What You Think of Yourself

Far more important than praise or criticism is what you think of yourself. I don't care if I'm receiving thousands of words of praise or attacks, if I know that what I'm doing doesn't reflect my true goals or values, I won't be happy. Start caring what you think of yourself, because you are the one that has to look in the mirror each day.

In running this business, I need to constantly ask myself whether what I'm doing is aligned with my goals. Do my daily actions reflect my short and long-term goals for the website? Am I writing content that delivers deeper value, or is it just self-help infocrack that gains popularity but provides no substance?

Praise and criticism can't answer those questions, only you can. Which is why you need to listen to yourself above everyone else.

Listening to yourself first isn't arrogant. You are the only person that intimately understands your goals and values. You are the one who set the goals in the first place. So, how can you expect other people, with different motives, to give you the ideal feedback to move forward?

Other people can offer great advice. But the emotional impact of praise and criticism should come from yourself. Other people can offer actionable suggestions, but they can't be the judge of your self-worth.

Humble Confidence

The ideal state of mind is humble confidence. You are humble, because you accept all feedback, searching for actionable suggestions, open to any opportunity. You are confident because you won't allow emotional praise or criticism to distract you from your goals.

In practice, it is impossible to maintain this state perfectly. I'm human like everyone else, so when I am insulted, I'll feel bad about that. When I'm praised, I'll feel happy. Those instincts won't go away.

However, if you accept those first impressions, but don't let them gnaw at your conscious self-image, you've succeeded. You can feel hurt from an insult, but you can evaluate the attack afterward and prevent it from wounding you. This is similar to the Stoic idea that nothing is good or bad, except in the mind. You may be forced to have a first impression from criticism or flattery, but you can then re-evaluate that so it doesn't distract you from your goals.

If people praise you, thank them and focus on your goal. If people criticize you, thank them and focus on your goal. Because, in the end, your the one who has to judge yourself and live with it.
if you were speaking to me...i was being serious. i don't usually play that game and say what i mean.

wow....i thought i wasw cynical.
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Joined: March 8th, 2007, 6:53 am

February 4th, 2011, 12:35 am #10

Not sure why anyone would not be nice to Roy.

were you think i was not being serious or jackie above??

sorry if i misinterpreted....sometimes hard to follow whom is talking to whom in the threads....;-/

and i can understand why....some people have no bioudries for their anger, hatred, hypocrisy or misery.

they suk....
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