About indoor pets, any problems with friends or family?

About indoor pets, any problems with friends or family?

Joined: June 5th, 2006, 5:33 pm

November 16th, 2011, 7:54 pm #1

Has anyone ever told you they didn't want to stay overnight with you because of your pets, or even said they don't want to come in because of them?

My dd#2 is extremely allergic to cats, which is one reason the cat isn't allowed in the house. I know dd would be miserable when she came.

My mom doesn't care that much and has 2 dogs and a cat. Or she did have a cat. She's not really a cat person and the cat getting on the kitchen counter was more than she could stand. I don't know why because she lets the dogs do anything they want. But anyway, dd#2 doesn't want to stay at her house over Christmas. She could handle one night with medication, but not 3.

Mom said she has cleaned the house and there won't be any cat hair when we get there. But I don't know if that is really possible and dd doesn't want to chance it, so we are all staying at a motel. Cha ching.

The dogs drive me insane (or more insane) with their barking, so it's kind of a relief to me to stay at a motel.

Now mom has arranged for a family reunion while we are there. She says she will put the dogs in another room. I think they will bark constantly but mom says they will settle down. They never have before when they've been put in a room for a short time.

Should I say anything else, or let it go? If yes, how would you word it to avoid hurting her feelings? I don't want the family to have to put up with the sound of scratching and barking for hours, but that's probably a pride thing. Mom doesn't care what they think of her, so why should I care if it reflects on me?

I think I am the same way about pets that I am about children. Mine don't bug me, but everyone else's do. lol But I never liked kids until I had one. I always liked dogs before.

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The road to success is always under construction.
Last edited by TxNet on November 16th, 2011, 7:56 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Joined: May 21st, 2006, 5:50 pm

November 17th, 2011, 12:12 am #2

we have someone in our family who won't come to visit due to dogs etc. Wouldn't visit her MIL either cuz she had cats. Yet this woman is a elementary teacher who hugs kids who have pets.
We invite her and then if she chooses not to attend, well, her loss.
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Joined: November 14th, 2005, 9:47 pm

November 17th, 2011, 12:36 am #3

Has anyone ever told you they didn't want to stay overnight with you because of your pets, or even said they don't want to come in because of them?

My dd#2 is extremely allergic to cats, which is one reason the cat isn't allowed in the house. I know dd would be miserable when she came.

My mom doesn't care that much and has 2 dogs and a cat. Or she did have a cat. She's not really a cat person and the cat getting on the kitchen counter was more than she could stand. I don't know why because she lets the dogs do anything they want. But anyway, dd#2 doesn't want to stay at her house over Christmas. She could handle one night with medication, but not 3.

Mom said she has cleaned the house and there won't be any cat hair when we get there. But I don't know if that is really possible and dd doesn't want to chance it, so we are all staying at a motel. Cha ching.

The dogs drive me insane (or more insane) with their barking, so it's kind of a relief to me to stay at a motel.

Now mom has arranged for a family reunion while we are there. She says she will put the dogs in another room. I think they will bark constantly but mom says they will settle down. They never have before when they've been put in a room for a short time.

Should I say anything else, or let it go? If yes, how would you word it to avoid hurting her feelings? I don't want the family to have to put up with the sound of scratching and barking for hours, but that's probably a pride thing. Mom doesn't care what they think of her, so why should I care if it reflects on me?

I think I am the same way about pets that I am about children. Mine don't bug me, but everyone else's do. lol But I never liked kids until I had one. I always liked dogs before.

------
The road to success is always under construction.
Poor thing is TERRIBLY allergic to cats. No chance in hell could she ever spend the night at my house. Your mom saying "I cleaned the house, so you can sleep here now" shows that she clearly doesn't understand the problem. Actually, vacuuming right before an allergic person arrives can make the problem worse than not vacuuming at all, because it stirs up all the cat dander in the carpet. When this friend comes to visit, I have a great excuse to not clean LOL. She can visit at my place for a few hours only before the allergies kick in to the point of her being miserable. We try to time her visits to my place in the summer (when the windows can be open or we can be on my deck) and have me visit her in the colder months.

Stay in the motel guilt free. Your daughter's allergy is a great excuse to not have to be around your mom's dogs! Let HER deal with HER animals' problems at the family reunion. Not your problem.
Last edited by DarcyMae on November 17th, 2011, 12:37 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Joined: June 5th, 2006, 5:33 pm

November 17th, 2011, 1:28 am #4

She doesn't have allergies, and neither do I, so I probably don't sympathize as much as I should. My dad had allergies but they weren't bad enough for him to ever take anything. Dd#2's throat almost swelled shut when she was little, and we carried an Epi pen in the cooler after that. She's better now but she still gets really congested, sneezing, coughing, miserable, and has to load up on Benedryl if she is going to be around cats. She scored high on so many food allergies that it was hard to feed her for several years, but that has gotten better too.

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Joined: June 5th, 2006, 5:33 pm

November 17th, 2011, 1:30 am #5

we have someone in our family who won't come to visit due to dogs etc. Wouldn't visit her MIL either cuz she had cats. Yet this woman is a elementary teacher who hugs kids who have pets.
We invite her and then if she chooses not to attend, well, her loss.
I know she has a friend with cats and they spend a lot of time together. She can ride in the car with the friend, and dd is a hugger, so I'm sure she hugs her when she sees her, but she can't go in the friend's house.

------
The road to success is always under construction.
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Joined: May 25th, 2006, 12:05 am

November 17th, 2011, 2:04 am #6

She doesn't have allergies, and neither do I, so I probably don't sympathize as much as I should. My dad had allergies but they weren't bad enough for him to ever take anything. Dd#2's throat almost swelled shut when she was little, and we carried an Epi pen in the cooler after that. She's better now but she still gets really congested, sneezing, coughing, miserable, and has to load up on Benedryl if she is going to be around cats. She scored high on so many food allergies that it was hard to feed her for several years, but that has gotten better too.

------
The road to success is always under construction.
Stay at a hotel, it's not worth risking your dd's health.

Do your best to ignore the dogs during the 'reunion', unless you want to suggest that you meet at the park so the kids can play, or a restaurant where we can all have dinner...

My oldest is very allergic to cats - her daughter LOVES cats (and somehow manages to make pets out of barn cats). DD has no problem with the cats outdoors, or problem with her dd being around the cats (although she does make her wash her hands when she comes inside), but if one of the cats gets or is brought inside, she is wheezing w/in minutes. (Grace has tried to sneak them in more than once when it's cold, or raining outside, Mommy always catches her, lol)
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Joined: May 21st, 2006, 5:50 pm

November 17th, 2011, 2:23 am #7

I know she has a friend with cats and they spend a lot of time together. She can ride in the car with the friend, and dd is a hugger, so I'm sure she hugs her when she sees her, but she can't go in the friend's house.

------
The road to success is always under construction.
one minute she says she can't possibly be around anyone who owns cats, dogs etc. and then she says their pets don't bother her that it's only relatives pets. Whatever.....
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Joined: June 5th, 2006, 5:33 pm

November 17th, 2011, 2:28 am #8

I said cat owners don't bother her when they are in a non-cat environment. A brief hug isn't at all the same as sitting in a chair that a cat has been sitting in, or walking across carpet that has cat hair and dander where you get it all over your pants legs.

------
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Joined: October 28th, 2005, 8:35 pm

November 17th, 2011, 2:51 am #9

Has anyone ever told you they didn't want to stay overnight with you because of your pets, or even said they don't want to come in because of them?

My dd#2 is extremely allergic to cats, which is one reason the cat isn't allowed in the house. I know dd would be miserable when she came.

My mom doesn't care that much and has 2 dogs and a cat. Or she did have a cat. She's not really a cat person and the cat getting on the kitchen counter was more than she could stand. I don't know why because she lets the dogs do anything they want. But anyway, dd#2 doesn't want to stay at her house over Christmas. She could handle one night with medication, but not 3.

Mom said she has cleaned the house and there won't be any cat hair when we get there. But I don't know if that is really possible and dd doesn't want to chance it, so we are all staying at a motel. Cha ching.

The dogs drive me insane (or more insane) with their barking, so it's kind of a relief to me to stay at a motel.

Now mom has arranged for a family reunion while we are there. She says she will put the dogs in another room. I think they will bark constantly but mom says they will settle down. They never have before when they've been put in a room for a short time.

Should I say anything else, or let it go? If yes, how would you word it to avoid hurting her feelings? I don't want the family to have to put up with the sound of scratching and barking for hours, but that's probably a pride thing. Mom doesn't care what they think of her, so why should I care if it reflects on me?

I think I am the same way about pets that I am about children. Mine don't bug me, but everyone else's do. lol But I never liked kids until I had one. I always liked dogs before.

------
The road to success is always under construction.
My SonInLaw cannot stay in my house for any length of time. My dd had to find a home for her cat when they got married. He will come and stay for dinner (they live in town) but by the end of the evening I can tell he is starting to suffer.

I usually try to dust plus vacuum the floor and chairs in the dining room before he comes but this only gives him a little time. I am not hurt, I know there is no way to get rid of the cat dander (it is usually not the hair that people are allergic to). We tend to either go out or visit them at their house. My sdd comes over with the grand baby and that is not a problem.

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Joined: May 28th, 2006, 3:48 am

November 17th, 2011, 10:15 pm #10

Has anyone ever told you they didn't want to stay overnight with you because of your pets, or even said they don't want to come in because of them?

My dd#2 is extremely allergic to cats, which is one reason the cat isn't allowed in the house. I know dd would be miserable when she came.

My mom doesn't care that much and has 2 dogs and a cat. Or she did have a cat. She's not really a cat person and the cat getting on the kitchen counter was more than she could stand. I don't know why because she lets the dogs do anything they want. But anyway, dd#2 doesn't want to stay at her house over Christmas. She could handle one night with medication, but not 3.

Mom said she has cleaned the house and there won't be any cat hair when we get there. But I don't know if that is really possible and dd doesn't want to chance it, so we are all staying at a motel. Cha ching.

The dogs drive me insane (or more insane) with their barking, so it's kind of a relief to me to stay at a motel.

Now mom has arranged for a family reunion while we are there. She says she will put the dogs in another room. I think they will bark constantly but mom says they will settle down. They never have before when they've been put in a room for a short time.

Should I say anything else, or let it go? If yes, how would you word it to avoid hurting her feelings? I don't want the family to have to put up with the sound of scratching and barking for hours, but that's probably a pride thing. Mom doesn't care what they think of her, so why should I care if it reflects on me?

I think I am the same way about pets that I am about children. Mine don't bug me, but everyone else's do. lol But I never liked kids until I had one. I always liked dogs before.

------
The road to success is always under construction.
As others have said, cleaning up the cat hair just isn't going to do it. It's impossible to eliminate all the dander. If your daughter can handle one day with the medication, go to the reunion and try to ignore the dogs. Spend the nights at a hotel. No reason for her to be miserable just to please her grandmother. Is your mom putting the dogs in another room because of allergies or because they're unruly?

I've had two acquaintances who wouldn't come over at all because we have two cats, and two who would come over but had to medicate beforehand and then stay for a couple of hours at the most because of allergies. It's not that uncommon.

I'm looking forward to spending some time in Michigan visiting friends and family this summer, but I'm not sure how I'm going to tell my parents that we're staying nights at my inlaws the whole time. My Dad smokes and the smell of the house makes me crazy even when he isn't smoking right that minute. The smell permeates everything. Plus they have a rather uncomfortable futon in the guest bedroom. We can see them during the day but we're not spending the night.
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