This weekend I went shopping specifically to look for a nice dress to wear to a evening party and fundraiser. Since it was a weekend, I wore jeans and a sweater leaving my bra at home. After trying on several "slinky sexy dresses" I couldn't decide between two and asked another women who was also trying on dresses her opinion. She commented that she though the burgandy Ralph Lauren dress was the prettier. She then commented that I need to make sure I wear a good strapless bra that will help lift me so that it is not noticable that I am braless. I was a little shocked so I told her that the dress was probably made to be worn with or without a bra. I then asked her if she thought I really needed a bra and her comment was "just to help lift me and keep me from bouncing as I walked". I was at a loss for words, as this woman looked to be in her early 30's like me. Now that it is a day later, I feel like I should have said something but it is now too late. How would you have handled it?

Kelli, I would have said- "I prefer the natural shape and movement of my breasts."

What could she say after that?

This weekend I went shopping specifically to look for a nice dress to wear to a evening party and fundraiser. Since it was a weekend, I wore jeans and a sweater leaving my bra at home. After trying on several "slinky sexy dresses" I couldn't decide between two and asked another women who was also trying on dresses her opinion. She commented that she though the burgandy Ralph Lauren dress was the prettier. She then commented that I need to make sure I wear a good strapless bra that will help lift me so that it is not noticable that I am braless. I was a little shocked so I told her that the dress was probably made to be worn with or without a bra. I then asked her if she thought I really needed a bra and her comment was "just to help lift me and keep me from bouncing as I walked". I was at a loss for words, as this woman looked to be in her early 30's like me. Now that it is a day later, I feel like I should have said something but it is now too late. How would you have handled it?

I would have been confused myself.

Did you say that she said that you needed a bra so that you wouldn't be able to tell that you were braless?

Why wear a bra if you are going to be braless? I don't get that.

and

yes, I think that you missed a good chance to have a conversation about bralessness. You could have told her that you wanted to be braless and maybe she would have continued the discussion further.

Try not to avoid chances to have friendly conversations about being brafree with your lady friends and see what they have to say.

Remember this lady works in a store which probably sells bras, so you can't expect objectivity. This is what makes it difficult to "sell" bra-freedom because people don't make money from brafreedom. There is a great vested interest from manufacturers, distributors, advertisers, and stores to SELL bras. They make no money from NOT selling them.

I thought it was just another customer...

Yes your right- I didn't read too carefully but in any case what I said still true enough when dealing with clerks. Their job is to sell you everything they can.

I don't know about anyone else, but when something is said to me that might be personal, or perhaps a little barbed, I am sometimes slightly stunned, and don't think of the perfect response until it's too late...Does that happen to anyone else but me? It's always easy to think in hindsight what would have been a good comeback, "man! I wish I'd said..."

Remember this lady works in a store which probably sells bras, so you can't expect objectivity. This is what makes it difficult to "sell" bra-freedom because people don't make money from brafreedom. There is a great vested interest from manufacturers, distributors, advertisers, and stores to SELL bras. They make no money from NOT selling them.

They could still sell camisoles and more expensive dresses and tops. Not selling bras would not necessarily hurt them, they would just sell women other things.

I thought it was just another customer...

I understood it was another woman who was also trying on dresses, not a sales clerk.

This weekend I went shopping specifically to look for a nice dress to wear to a evening party and fundraiser. Since it was a weekend, I wore jeans and a sweater leaving my bra at home. After trying on several "slinky sexy dresses" I couldn't decide between two and asked another women who was also trying on dresses her opinion. She commented that she though the burgandy Ralph Lauren dress was the prettier. She then commented that I need to make sure I wear a good strapless bra that will help lift me so that it is not noticable that I am braless. I was a little shocked so I told her that the dress was probably made to be worn with or without a bra. I then asked her if she thought I really needed a bra and her comment was "just to help lift me and keep me from bouncing as I walked". I was at a loss for words, as this woman looked to be in her early 30's like me. Now that it is a day later, I feel like I should have said something but it is now too late. How would you have handled it?

I am a man. Even so, here is what would have been appropriate:

"Thank you very much for your help. Have a great day".

Then you go home, put the dress on first without a bra and then with a bra. After that, you pick the way you like it the best.

A hundred years from now, no one will remember which choice you made, nor care. Why wait until then? Just do what you want to do now. Either choice you make is the right choice.