Implants

Implants

Joined: December 17th, 2003, 1:00 am

December 17th, 2003, 1:00 am #1

Hi everyone, I just had a question for everyone here. My mom recently divorced my dad, and after this my mom decided she wanted a change. My mom got farily large breast implants. Before the surgery she was fairly flat but now she is quite big. My mom I think went braless before the surgery, and she is also doing that after the surgery. The problem is she now is verry obvious not wearing a bra. I mean she doesn't need one becasue of her implants, but it is still kinda emabrassing, she never wears one even when were outside the house, and it hurts me becasue some people make comments about it and I hear them. My question is is this normal behaviour, or should I talk to her about this. Thanks to everyone in advance =)
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John Bayko
John Bayko

December 17th, 2003, 1:41 am #2

"The problem is she now is verry obvious not wearing a bra. [...] it is still kinda emabrassing[...] it hurts me becasue some people make comments about it and I hear them. My question is is this normal behaviour, or should I talk to her about this."

It's normal, people are usually embarassed by things their parents do.

Okay, that's probably not what you meant. But before you talk to her, maybe ask yourself what it is you're not comfortable about.

And you might consider whether the problem with the comments is that maybe you partially agree with them, or that people are just being rude and it's none of their business anyway? After all, she's not doing anything different than she ever did, what should be the problem from her point of view?

From your point of view (and others), her breasts are bigger. What does that mean to you - are "breasts" and "mother" just two things you'd rather not think of together?

That's normal too.

Maybe what you don't like is the idea that she's flaunting them - that's what all those people are implying, isn't it? And by doing that she's forcing those two ideas together where you don't want them to be - in your brain.

Well, here's a thought - you can get used to anything.

And another thought - she probably doesn't think about breasts the same way that you do. And for that matter, not the same was as those people making the comments. A lot of people think that the world is only one way - they way they think it is - and get put out when anything comes along to challenge that, and if your mother's bra habits do that, then they're going to comment.

Anyway, whether to talk to her about it is up to you.
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Glenda
Glenda

December 17th, 2003, 1:43 am #3

Hi everyone, I just had a question for everyone here. My mom recently divorced my dad, and after this my mom decided she wanted a change. My mom got farily large breast implants. Before the surgery she was fairly flat but now she is quite big. My mom I think went braless before the surgery, and she is also doing that after the surgery. The problem is she now is verry obvious not wearing a bra. I mean she doesn't need one becasue of her implants, but it is still kinda emabrassing, she never wears one even when were outside the house, and it hurts me becasue some people make comments about it and I hear them. My question is is this normal behaviour, or should I talk to her about this. Thanks to everyone in advance =)
Trevor, your concern and love for your mom is commendable. She has made a personal choice that is not detrimental to her health or safety, and on the contrary may help her feel good about herself. While you do not have to agree with her decision, out of love, you could choose to support her. Let her know you don't agree, but will support her because you love her.

As for people talking ... ... welcome to the not so nice side of life ... ... we don't know most of what people think and say about us. If they don't love us enough to personally tell us, their opinion is worthless.

Best wishes.
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Mike
Mike

December 17th, 2003, 2:11 am #4

Hi everyone, I just had a question for everyone here. My mom recently divorced my dad, and after this my mom decided she wanted a change. My mom got farily large breast implants. Before the surgery she was fairly flat but now she is quite big. My mom I think went braless before the surgery, and she is also doing that after the surgery. The problem is she now is verry obvious not wearing a bra. I mean she doesn't need one becasue of her implants, but it is still kinda emabrassing, she never wears one even when were outside the house, and it hurts me becasue some people make comments about it and I hear them. My question is is this normal behaviour, or should I talk to her about this. Thanks to everyone in advance =)
"it is still kinda emabrassing, she never wears one a bra even when were outside the house, and it hurts me becasue some people make comments about it and I hear them"

Well if she feels comfortable not wearing a bra outside in public that is HER decision and weither its embarassing or not which it shouldnt be she really needs to stick up for what she beleives in and not let what people say bother her and honestly if what they say doesnt bother her then it shouldnt bother you either because if what they were saying is true then it would bother her and since it doesnt and since its not something that should bother anyone in the first place then its not really something to worry about. Id just let her go braless I mean it is her decision and if she gets bugged by what they say then just advise her on how to deal with what they say to her and not to just give in and wear a bra because that wouldnt be helping her it would just fuel their anger and misunderstanding and theyd win in the end and you dont want people like that to win, you gotta stick up for what you think is right even if these people are hateful in what they say. These are obviously immature or misinformed people who need to learn the facts or just get a life and in either case are not worth your time or effort because you will just stress yourself beyond beleif over something very trivial.
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Mike
Mike

December 17th, 2003, 2:22 am #5

Its me again. Just thought id add something since ive read other people's posts on this subject. Although im not a big fan of implants of any kind, because I see them as something artificial and thus not something the body needs or has to have like say a artificial arm or one of those mechanical hearts and thus is unecessary and oftentimes dangerous more so to a person's health than the feelings and ridicule they get before they have the implants, BUT I am an advocate for people's rights and mostly weither I think its right or wrong is irrelevant. I want to state my opinion and possibly provide some facts or a different viewpoint but if the person takes it or not or thinks im a weirdo because of it is entirely up to them and I dont want to get in the middle of their decision. So really I think you ought to just support HER decision *your mom's* say that you disagree and tell her how you feel but say you love her and will support whatever choice she makes. Also you should talk to her about some of the reasons why you dont like or dont feel right about what she has chosen to do

1. It might give her a different perspective of it than she has before.

2. You can get your feelings out to someone.

3. She MIGHT beleive it or not, actually be able to help you with your problems and give you or provide you with the solution or the steps to finding the solution or other sources that might be able to better help you with your solution.

I mean I can understand your issues here. What im really wondering about is, does the fact that she is braless bother you or does the fact that she now has implants and is braless bother you? Just because her breasts are bigger doesnt mean they should be any more unnatural or bad than smaller ones and if it doesnt bother her since they are HER breasts then why should it bother you. If shes got a problem with it then she'll probably tell you or tell those people that are bothering her what she thinks or she'll just go get a bra, whatever the case, just give your support and leave the ultimate decision up to her, ok.
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Joined: December 17th, 2003, 1:00 am

December 17th, 2003, 4:00 am #6

Hi everyone, I just had a question for everyone here. My mom recently divorced my dad, and after this my mom decided she wanted a change. My mom got farily large breast implants. Before the surgery she was fairly flat but now she is quite big. My mom I think went braless before the surgery, and she is also doing that after the surgery. The problem is she now is verry obvious not wearing a bra. I mean she doesn't need one becasue of her implants, but it is still kinda emabrassing, she never wears one even when were outside the house, and it hurts me becasue some people make comments about it and I hear them. My question is is this normal behaviour, or should I talk to her about this. Thanks to everyone in advance =)
I mean the comments that people make hurt me becasue I don't want my mom to feel bad. But another problem that I was afraid to bring up that others have hinted does deal with my mom's new look. I mean it is kinda hard to look at my mom's new figure. I mean she is my mom and it wierd to see her like she is now. I don't think she thinks the clothes that she wears don't effect but they do, I mean it is hard to see your mom dress in a way that men make comments about and look at.
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Anudist
Anudist

December 17th, 2003, 4:11 am #7

Hi everyone, I just had a question for everyone here. My mom recently divorced my dad, and after this my mom decided she wanted a change. My mom got farily large breast implants. Before the surgery she was fairly flat but now she is quite big. My mom I think went braless before the surgery, and she is also doing that after the surgery. The problem is she now is verry obvious not wearing a bra. I mean she doesn't need one becasue of her implants, but it is still kinda emabrassing, she never wears one even when were outside the house, and it hurts me becasue some people make comments about it and I hear them. My question is is this normal behaviour, or should I talk to her about this. Thanks to everyone in advance =)
Dear Trevor,

Regardless of what she does/did/doesn't do people will talk. They'd talk about the divorce, they'll talk about the implants, heck, they'd even make comments like she should have gotten implants to keep her man.

Unfortunately, its natural for people to talk.

I emphatisize with you. You don't know what to say, do and/or think.

All I can suggest is that you try to keep cool. Know your mother's strengths and work on promoting those strengths, give her support that you can, have an open and honest conversation with her about what you are experiencing.

Best wishes.

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JB
JB

December 17th, 2003, 5:22 pm #8

I mean the comments that people make hurt me becasue I don't want my mom to feel bad. But another problem that I was afraid to bring up that others have hinted does deal with my mom's new look. I mean it is kinda hard to look at my mom's new figure. I mean she is my mom and it wierd to see her like she is now. I don't think she thinks the clothes that she wears don't effect but they do, I mean it is hard to see your mom dress in a way that men make comments about and look at.
I had a "problem" with my mother that was a little different. She was just too well dressed for work and she worked in an area where that could get one in trouble, especially if they had to walk to and from bus stops. I told her that I did not think it wise for her to wear shoes that she can't run in and that she should not wear bright colors except possibly under a coat or sweater. After a few weeks, she told me she discovered that I was right. She changed her look slightly and then was not bothered on the street.
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Mike
Mike

December 17th, 2003, 5:29 pm #9

I mean the comments that people make hurt me becasue I don't want my mom to feel bad. But another problem that I was afraid to bring up that others have hinted does deal with my mom's new look. I mean it is kinda hard to look at my mom's new figure. I mean she is my mom and it wierd to see her like she is now. I don't think she thinks the clothes that she wears don't effect but they do, I mean it is hard to see your mom dress in a way that men make comments about and look at.
Those men would probably comment negatively about almost anything. You cant go and change your whole style every time someone has a negative view of it. As long as she is happy with it, who cares of a bunch of immature horny guys have a problem with it. Besides if your mom has a problem with the way she is, she really has no room to complain, she wanted to be that way and now she is and shes just gonna have to live with it and if those guys dont like it then theyre not worth her time or effort.
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Mike
Mike

December 17th, 2003, 5:33 pm #10

I had a "problem" with my mother that was a little different. She was just too well dressed for work and she worked in an area where that could get one in trouble, especially if they had to walk to and from bus stops. I told her that I did not think it wise for her to wear shoes that she can't run in and that she should not wear bright colors except possibly under a coat or sweater. After a few weeks, she told me she discovered that I was right. She changed her look slightly and then was not bothered on the street.
Well protecting yourself from thugs and rapists and protecting yourself from a bunch of horny immature guys is two different things. I honestly think if she was comfortable in the clothing then she shouldnt have worried about it so much, im sure she could look after herself if someone came after her and im sure those people would just as soon attack someone with regular clothing on than people who are dressed nicely, most of these people either enjoy causing trouble or they want money and honestly if she is a frequent in that area even if she changes her clothing, the people around there still know shes got alot of money on her so they might still try something. Maybe itd be wise that she didnt live in that sort of neighborhood.
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