Boys, puberty, and shaving - asking for advice!

Boys, puberty, and shaving - asking for advice!

Jenn
Jenn

August 10th, 2010, 9:44 pm #1

This topic was brought up on the FB forum - but it seemed more appropriate here. I read the other day online that puberty is hitting kids earlier - they were saying some girls were starting their periods at 7 - YIKES! I started early - but not THAT early!

I have two boys. The oldest is starting to change - and rather than being proud or excited, he wants to "get rid" of his "fuzz down there". Up to now I have just told him its a part of growing up and give things some time. Then I thought that I remove mine (as does my sister and my niece) and - as for males in his life - both my brother and brother in law do as well (to varying extents.) So I'm not sure if this is just "following" us; or if maybe he just doesnt feel ready for it. So - should I let him shave his little bush (there isnt that much) or just tell him to give it more time? And what do I do if he feels the same way when the hair on his legs or under his arms starts to come in?

Then if I offer him the option of removing it, do I just buy him one of those little electric trimmers that cant cut and let him do it himself or do I ask my brother or brother in law to help - or do I take him to the spa with me and let them do it?

I realize this is an odd question - this is where I bring ALL my odd questions - not exactly the kind of thing you can ask at work...

Did any of you feel like this? Any similar situations? Any advice or recommendations? I'm very open - I just want him to be comfortable with himself and his body.
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Nat
Joined: January 1st, 1970, 12:00 am

August 10th, 2010, 11:50 pm #2

As you mention Jenn, kids are reaching puberty sooner now- I don't know if its good nutrition or residues of hormones they feed cattle these days in our food (I suspect that!). But kid's physical maturity may not be matched by their emotional maturity- and it may be that your son has a bit of "Peter Pan" syndrome- that is he enjoys being a kid and is not quite ready to take on the expectations and responsibilities of becoming more like a man.

In any case, shaving hair is no life-shaping decision- it will grow back so I see no harm in letting him shave it if he wants to. I do recommend a GOOD electric shaver- not some cheap Walmart thing with a vibrator type motor (good ones have rotary motors). A barber supply place is a good place to find that. They cost more but work better- smoother, quieter and will outlast several cheap ones.

As to shaving himself or letting someone else do it- I would leave it to him to make that decision.
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Brandon
Brandon

August 11th, 2010, 12:32 am #3

We've talked a lot over the years about changes in popular culture since the 1970s, but what caused the following to change?

Back in the 1970s, the true sign of a man was chest hair. Look at any movie or tv show or magazine ad from those days or think about Burt Reynolds who was considered the ultimate sex symbol by many women in the 1970s.

But today, many women apparently find hairy chests to be gross and ideal is for a man to be smooth chested.

My mom has watched the soap Days of our Lives since the 1960s, so I grew up with it always being on the tv or later the VCR at home. I still find myself turning it on about once a month and whenever one of the actors has his shirt off (too frequently these days), he is as waxed as can be.

Why did women change what they consider sexy in this area?
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Nat
Joined: January 1st, 1970, 12:00 am

August 11th, 2010, 1:46 am #4

Well just as fashion in clothes changes- long/short snug/baggy, so it is with hair. I read several teen forums sometimes just to keep up with what young people are thinking these days and I can tell you that body-shaving- especially pubic shaving- is very "in" now. Maybe it's their way to be different than us old folks- like 40 years ago we had long head hair to be different than our parents. Or maybe it was the athletes in the summer Olympics in China last year- or who knows. But there are worse things they could be doing.
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Jenn
Jenn

August 11th, 2010, 12:42 pm #5

We've talked a lot over the years about changes in popular culture since the 1970s, but what caused the following to change?

Back in the 1970s, the true sign of a man was chest hair. Look at any movie or tv show or magazine ad from those days or think about Burt Reynolds who was considered the ultimate sex symbol by many women in the 1970s.

But today, many women apparently find hairy chests to be gross and ideal is for a man to be smooth chested.

My mom has watched the soap Days of our Lives since the 1960s, so I grew up with it always being on the tv or later the VCR at home. I still find myself turning it on about once a month and whenever one of the actors has his shirt off (too frequently these days), he is as waxed as can be.

Why did women change what they consider sexy in this area?
Well - I think two things. When I have seen old "men's magazines" (60's and 70's) almost all of the girls had hair - and often it wasn't even trimmed. When I have seen more recent magazines almost all of the girls go Brazilian - or at the very least are closely trimmed. I myself go Brazilian because I like it better - as does my niece. My sister prefers to keep a little. My understanding is that gentlemen prefer this - thus the change in magazine photos.

I also think that men and women are either becoming more similar or possibly even switching roles. I know a lot of guys who want to get married and more and more women who dont. I know more guys are "at home" dads and more moms who work outside the home.

But for me I think humans are heading toward a "less hairy" future altogether. I find smooth both more appealing and honestly more "sexy". I have dated guys who shaved their legs, under their arms, chests, backs, and other areas. Far from being put off, I loved the feel of smooth skin on smooth skin - especially legs.

My sister started bringing her daughter to the spa with us to get our "hair" done when she was 13. Apparently, other girls she knew had already started. So - peer pressure, trends, better hygiene, or social evolution - who knows? I do know that certain things become much more pleasureable on both men and women - and I'm thankful for that.
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Jenn
Jenn

August 14th, 2010, 3:27 pm #6

This topic was brought up on the FB forum - but it seemed more appropriate here. I read the other day online that puberty is hitting kids earlier - they were saying some girls were starting their periods at 7 - YIKES! I started early - but not THAT early!

I have two boys. The oldest is starting to change - and rather than being proud or excited, he wants to "get rid" of his "fuzz down there". Up to now I have just told him its a part of growing up and give things some time. Then I thought that I remove mine (as does my sister and my niece) and - as for males in his life - both my brother and brother in law do as well (to varying extents.) So I'm not sure if this is just "following" us; or if maybe he just doesnt feel ready for it. So - should I let him shave his little bush (there isnt that much) or just tell him to give it more time? And what do I do if he feels the same way when the hair on his legs or under his arms starts to come in?

Then if I offer him the option of removing it, do I just buy him one of those little electric trimmers that cant cut and let him do it himself or do I ask my brother or brother in law to help - or do I take him to the spa with me and let them do it?

I realize this is an odd question - this is where I bring ALL my odd questions - not exactly the kind of thing you can ask at work...

Did any of you feel like this? Any similar situations? Any advice or recommendations? I'm very open - I just want him to be comfortable with himself and his body.
Well - after a lot of thought and taking the advice I received here and from my brother, sister, and brother in law I decided it wouldnt do any harm to offer him some options. We had a (very) brief conversation and later today my brother is coming over to help him out. I've also asked him to talk to him a little more about the "why" just in case. But I suspect that by this afternoon he will be bush-free again. I have mixed emotions, but mostly like I said before just want him to be happy and comfortable.
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Nat
Joined: January 1st, 1970, 12:00 am

August 14th, 2010, 4:25 pm #7

It's not like whatever he decides now is irreversible. If he wanted to get tattoos all over his face I would be very concerned- but hair grows back so if he later decides he wants it- it will happen.
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Jenn
Jenn

August 16th, 2010, 11:52 am #8

This topic was brought up on the FB forum - but it seemed more appropriate here. I read the other day online that puberty is hitting kids earlier - they were saying some girls were starting their periods at 7 - YIKES! I started early - but not THAT early!

I have two boys. The oldest is starting to change - and rather than being proud or excited, he wants to "get rid" of his "fuzz down there". Up to now I have just told him its a part of growing up and give things some time. Then I thought that I remove mine (as does my sister and my niece) and - as for males in his life - both my brother and brother in law do as well (to varying extents.) So I'm not sure if this is just "following" us; or if maybe he just doesnt feel ready for it. So - should I let him shave his little bush (there isnt that much) or just tell him to give it more time? And what do I do if he feels the same way when the hair on his legs or under his arms starts to come in?

Then if I offer him the option of removing it, do I just buy him one of those little electric trimmers that cant cut and let him do it himself or do I ask my brother or brother in law to help - or do I take him to the spa with me and let them do it?

I realize this is an odd question - this is where I bring ALL my odd questions - not exactly the kind of thing you can ask at work...

Did any of you feel like this? Any similar situations? Any advice or recommendations? I'm very open - I just want him to be comfortable with himself and his body.
While browsing the net I came across this. I guess this is more common than I thought. Had I known, I wouldnt have thought so hard or worried so much about it.

I'm a little concerned that the article makes it sound so weird - and so "parent-motivated." I wonder how many of these kids ASKED like mine did. Well - for those who care...

http://www.thefrisky.com/post/246-daily ... /?eref=RSS
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Nat
Joined: January 1st, 1970, 12:00 am

August 16th, 2010, 2:02 pm #9

Well now we are talking about a different gender- girls- but it brings up the whole issue of sexualizing little girls by having them wear make-up and enter beauty contests (remember JonBenét Ramsey?). It seems that the age when little-girls become big-girls has been dropping through the years and is now at ridiculous levels.
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Tubby
Tubby

August 17th, 2010, 10:40 am #10

Have to agree with you there Nat. It seems that the stores are pushing harder and harder with this sort of thing. Recently in Australia there was an outcry about shops offering a padded bikini top for preteen girls. Luckily there was an outcry about it and it was stopped but it seems to be a way of enlarging profits.
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