THE ANISSA JONES SCREENPLAY ("Little Doll")

THE ANISSA JONES SCREENPLAY ("Little Doll")

e-daisy
e-daisy

May 6th, 2012, 5:45 am #1



FADE IN: OCEANSIDE, CALIFORNIA-PRE DAWN, SUMMER, 1976

A late August breeze rustles the curtain of an upper bedroom window. The atmosphere is humid, damp, sour.
The camera moves through the white mesh lace pattern of the curtain as if through a cosmic pinhole, pans through the half-light, and focuses on
the strange shape of a woven macrame owl, so popular in the decor of a middle-class California beach house of the mid-seventies, whose
ceramic eyes cast an accusatory glance. The camera slowly zooms into it's threaded pupils, and the then slowly pans down the wall to two figures sleeping on a bed. Vague party music is heard, muffled and distant, mixed with adolescent giggles rising and then receding.
We now make out one of the figures to be a smallish teenage girl,who stirs restlessly across the bunched and twisted sheets in a pool of sweat. A hand
reaches out to touch the older male figure sleeping beside her, fingers aching for contact in an open gesture of need. There is no response. The fingers
close into a fist, the delicate pale arm falling in wounded defeat.


Note: installments of this screenplay will appear here sequentially in chronological order over the next six months, exclusively.


Copyright 2012


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new york fan
new york fan

May 7th, 2012, 2:24 am #2

the best thing of this brief excerpt of your screenplay is the detail of the woven macrome owl. i take it that representations of owls, particularly macrome owls were the fashion in southern, coastal, california in 1976?

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new york fan
new york fan

May 7th, 2012, 2:35 am #3


FADE IN: OCEANSIDE, CALIFORNIA-PRE DAWN, SUMMER, 1976

A late August breeze rustles the curtain of an upper bedroom window. The atmosphere is humid, damp, sour.
The camera moves through the white mesh lace pattern of the curtain as if through a cosmic pinhole, pans through the half-light, and focuses on
the strange shape of a woven macrame owl, so popular in the decor of a middle-class California beach house of the mid-seventies, whose
ceramic eyes cast an accusatory glance. The camera slowly zooms into it's threaded pupils, and the then slowly pans down the wall to two figures sleeping on a bed. Vague party music is heard, muffled and distant, mixed with adolescent giggles rising and then receding.
We now make out one of the figures to be a smallish teenage girl,who stirs restlessly across the bunched and twisted sheets in a pool of sweat. A hand
reaches out to touch the older male figure sleeping beside her, fingers aching for contact in an open gesture of need. There is no response. The fingers
close into a fist, the delicate pale arm falling in wounded defeat.


Note: installments of this screenplay will appear here sequentially in chronological order over the next six months, exclusively.


Copyright 2012

please change the title. anissa was at the very least, legally an adult. anissa was no "little doll". please don't make her story something sentimental. anissa was no angel, though her story deserves to be told.
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new york fan
new york fan

May 7th, 2012, 3:03 am #4


FADE IN: OCEANSIDE, CALIFORNIA-PRE DAWN, SUMMER, 1976

A late August breeze rustles the curtain of an upper bedroom window. The atmosphere is humid, damp, sour.
The camera moves through the white mesh lace pattern of the curtain as if through a cosmic pinhole, pans through the half-light, and focuses on
the strange shape of a woven macrame owl, so popular in the decor of a middle-class California beach house of the mid-seventies, whose
ceramic eyes cast an accusatory glance. The camera slowly zooms into it's threaded pupils, and the then slowly pans down the wall to two figures sleeping on a bed. Vague party music is heard, muffled and distant, mixed with adolescent giggles rising and then receding.
We now make out one of the figures to be a smallish teenage girl,who stirs restlessly across the bunched and twisted sheets in a pool of sweat. A hand
reaches out to touch the older male figure sleeping beside her, fingers aching for contact in an open gesture of need. There is no response. The fingers
close into a fist, the delicate pale arm falling in wounded defeat.


Note: installments of this screenplay will appear here sequentially in chronological order over the next six months, exclusively.


Copyright 2012

there's a rich moral complexity to anissa's story. a moral complexity to be mined by a shrewd, unsentimental, unflinching, but poetic writer.

it would be sad and poor writing, to see anissa portrayed only as an innocent victim.
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THE WOLF MCCARRON SCREENPLAY ("Big Fag")
THE WOLF MCCARRON SCREENPLAY ("Big Fag")

May 7th, 2012, 4:19 am #5

SETTING. FENCE OUTSIDE AREA 51

Wolf has his night vision goggles on. He is waiting for a UFO. He is caught in the tractor beam of a UFO. Wolf is pulled up into the UFO eigth miles above Area 51 behind cloud cover. Wolf is placed by small grey beings on a cold metal table that yields to body pressure. A chrome like appendage comes up from the table and rams up Wolf's butt. Wolf enjoys it.

(to be continued)

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new york fan
new york fan

May 8th, 2012, 1:37 am #6


FADE IN: OCEANSIDE, CALIFORNIA-PRE DAWN, SUMMER, 1976

A late August breeze rustles the curtain of an upper bedroom window. The atmosphere is humid, damp, sour.
The camera moves through the white mesh lace pattern of the curtain as if through a cosmic pinhole, pans through the half-light, and focuses on
the strange shape of a woven macrame owl, so popular in the decor of a middle-class California beach house of the mid-seventies, whose
ceramic eyes cast an accusatory glance. The camera slowly zooms into it's threaded pupils, and the then slowly pans down the wall to two figures sleeping on a bed. Vague party music is heard, muffled and distant, mixed with adolescent giggles rising and then receding.
We now make out one of the figures to be a smallish teenage girl,who stirs restlessly across the bunched and twisted sheets in a pool of sweat. A hand
reaches out to touch the older male figure sleeping beside her, fingers aching for contact in an open gesture of need. There is no response. The fingers
close into a fist, the delicate pale arm falling in wounded defeat.


Note: installments of this screenplay will appear here sequentially in chronological order over the next six months, exclusively.


Copyright 2012

no vague party music. the movie should have all the music of the time playing in background and foreground, throughout the movie. i think diana ross' "love hangover" should be playing distinctly in the background in your opening scene and should be the last song in the movie, played at full volume. "love hangover" would be a bitter, ironic, musical theme, to anissa's story. "love hangover" has a strange, ghostly, haunting, minor key, quality to it.

im thinking of a treatment like "carlito's way". probably the best and most underrated gangster movie of all time. throughout "carlito's way" the music of the '70s plays in almost every scene, as background or foreground, each song adds to the feel and meaning of each scene, and summons forth the year of 1975. music can bring forth and can instill in the mind of the audience, the times past as almost no other thing can.

like "carlito's way", anissa's movie should have the feel of an inevitable, inescapable, impending doom. the audience should be made to feel a great optimism, only to be heartbreakingly shattered at the end.

the audience must be made to feel love, pity, and contempt for anissa, paula, paul, john paul, butch koven, helen henessy, and all those involved.

a fine balance must be created to show the intertwining(macrome?), of free will and choice, with destiny and fate.

believe me, anissa's story is a rich, and richly rewarding story, for the writer that can fathom it's depths!
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diane
diane

May 31st, 2012, 5:58 am #7

SETTING. FENCE OUTSIDE AREA 51

Wolf has his night vision goggles on. He is waiting for a UFO. He is caught in the tractor beam of a UFO. Wolf is pulled up into the UFO eigth miles above Area 51 behind cloud cover. Wolf is placed by small grey beings on a cold metal table that yields to body pressure. A chrome like appendage comes up from the table and rams up Wolf's butt. Wolf enjoys it.

(to be continued)
There are different places you could start this story. You seem to make the same mistake I have made. I was told that you need to start in the middle of a scene. For example: If you are showing a street fight, don't show the person leaving his house and walking down the street, then geting into a fight. You need to start with the fight. Get people curious.

For Anissa, you need to start with a situation, (1) You could show someone checking on Anissa in the middle of the night and finding her blue, cold, and limp. (2) You could start with a body being carried out on a stretcher from the house where Anissa died. (3) You could start it in the hospital where she is being examined, but don't really show her body. Show doctors who are around a patient whose body is covered in a sheet. (4) The disposing of her cremains off a small boat in the middle of the Atlantic.

You could make the story about her friends getting together at a pizza parlor and gradually telling the tale of how her end came to be and what she meant to them. For this, you really should do some research with people who knew her. I know Bill was only ten when Anissa died, but he might have some leads. Can you contact that guy Butch or his brother because you would want to put Butch in this story. Perhaps, he can defend himself. People are giving him a bad wrap for Anissa's death. From what I have read on this message board, Anissa had problems,probably before she went with Butch. Let's not forget that she had problems at home, and ended up in juvenille hall. We know that her mother reported her and that was how that happened. I think that would mean she was a difficult teen and her mother felt there was no other way to handle the situation. Perhaps, in your research you will be able to find out if it was her mother's fault, her father's fault, or even a little bit of the parents and Anissa.

There are so many angles. For Anissa, you could show the problems of a child star. There is an address somewhere on this site for Paula. Perhaps the people who live there, might be able to help you out, as well. Here it is: Amin F Beshara 8905 Wilshire St Livonia Mi 48150.

What you will need is to develop the characters of Anissa's parents. Not in all cases, but ususally parents when they discover they have a talented child, use the child as a source of income for the family. I would want to know if Paula had any needs that she thought a show business salary could provide for her. Maybe Anissa's career started around the time her parents were divorced, and her father was not supplying enough money for Anissa, her brother, and her mother to live on. You can also show how much pressure this was for Anissa to live up to as a child star.

I also read on this site that Anissa had to work all the time, including all kinds of personal appearances. She was also expected to remain a 6 -year-old on Family Affair and also during public appearances. What does that mean to a girl beginning puberty?

You have so much to work with. If you wanted to make a statement about child stars, you can always talk to Paul Petersen who runs Minor Consideration to help the Anissa Jones' of today.


I remember when some did a documentary on Rod Serling. You saw a clock in the operating room and doctors working on a patient.

Maybe we could learn how to be good writers together.Maybe you should brainstorm what kind of conflict Anissa was in. In this case, the story really should start at the end of her life. Think of Citizen Kane when the story started with the announcement of his death. I don't know if I want to see this story begin with a newscaster announcing Anissa's death. As Citizen Kane went, that film was really about a reporter who wanted to do a story about a prominent citizen, so the reporter did some research to find out who Charles Foster Kane was, and who was Rosebud. That was done and we don't want to go there with Anissa.


There are so many examples. Mommie Dearest . Other than the opening montage of Joan crawford getting ready to go to the studio, where the credits were seen, she was walking on the beach with some guy. Maybe he was a boyriend or former husband. She learned that she was turned down when she wanted to adopt a child because she was single. That leads to the black market sitution where she adopted Christina.

You can start when Anissa first went out of control. This could be high school or junior high. I guess we can call this idea numbr 5 for the opening. Show her sneaking drug and having a drug trip.

Good luck to you and I will be looking forward to seeing other drafts.
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diane
diane

May 31st, 2012, 6:01 am #8

no vague party music. the movie should have all the music of the time playing in background and foreground, throughout the movie. i think diana ross' "love hangover" should be playing distinctly in the background in your opening scene and should be the last song in the movie, played at full volume. "love hangover" would be a bitter, ironic, musical theme, to anissa's story. "love hangover" has a strange, ghostly, haunting, minor key, quality to it.

im thinking of a treatment like "carlito's way". probably the best and most underrated gangster movie of all time. throughout "carlito's way" the music of the '70s plays in almost every scene, as background or foreground, each song adds to the feel and meaning of each scene, and summons forth the year of 1975. music can bring forth and can instill in the mind of the audience, the times past as almost no other thing can.

like "carlito's way", anissa's movie should have the feel of an inevitable, inescapable, impending doom. the audience should be made to feel a great optimism, only to be heartbreakingly shattered at the end.

the audience must be made to feel love, pity, and contempt for anissa, paula, paul, john paul, butch koven, helen henessy, and all those involved.

a fine balance must be created to show the intertwining(macrome?), of free will and choice, with destiny and fate.

believe me, anissa's story is a rich, and richly rewarding story, for the writer that can fathom it's depths!
The 70s music should reflect who Anissa was. How do we know she liked Diana Ross songs?

This goes along with research and finding out what represents Anissa. In the 1960s teens were into Jimi Hendrix. We would have to think about who these kids were listening to that got them high in 1976.
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diane
diane

May 31st, 2012, 6:16 am #9


FADE IN: OCEANSIDE, CALIFORNIA-PRE DAWN, SUMMER, 1976

A late August breeze rustles the curtain of an upper bedroom window. The atmosphere is humid, damp, sour.
The camera moves through the white mesh lace pattern of the curtain as if through a cosmic pinhole, pans through the half-light, and focuses on
the strange shape of a woven macrame owl, so popular in the decor of a middle-class California beach house of the mid-seventies, whose
ceramic eyes cast an accusatory glance. The camera slowly zooms into it's threaded pupils, and the then slowly pans down the wall to two figures sleeping on a bed. Vague party music is heard, muffled and distant, mixed with adolescent giggles rising and then receding.
We now make out one of the figures to be a smallish teenage girl,who stirs restlessly across the bunched and twisted sheets in a pool of sweat. A hand
reaches out to touch the older male figure sleeping beside her, fingers aching for contact in an open gesture of need. There is no response. The fingers
close into a fist, the delicate pale arm falling in wounded defeat.


Note: installments of this screenplay will appear here sequentially in chronological order over the next six months, exclusively.


Copyright 2012

I looked over your story again, you did start with a crisis. I guess I did not read that far the first time. My fault. I would have gone further than discover her limp body. There would need to be a reaction. Many people have limp bodies when they sleep. (1) How do you know she was sleeping with someone when she died? (2) I am with the person who said you should change the title of Little Doll to something that is more suitable. You ned to work on that.


Please keep my suggestions that I gave earlier. Do some research. You might find a better title than Little Doll. I don't know if this is Mrs. Beasley or Anissa who is supposed to be the little doll. You need to find that out. If it is Mrs. Beasley, then perhaps this centers around Anissa being kept in the image of a little girl while she is blossoming into a young woman. This in turn is the conflict between who Buffy Davis is and who Anissa Jones is. Maybe this is the route of her future drug problem.
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new york fan
new york fan

May 31st, 2012, 6:56 am #10

The 70s music should reflect who Anissa was. How do we know she liked Diana Ross songs?

This goes along with research and finding out what represents Anissa. In the 1960s teens were into Jimi Hendrix. We would have to think about who these kids were listening to that got them high in 1976.
i guess it all depends on what you like and enjoy diane. two things i've never enjoyed are court-room dramas and dramatized biographies.

in anissa's story i was thinking something more along the lines of creative allegory, fable, california gothic. not that any lies should be invented, anissa's story needs no lies, it's filled with so much drama; but fully accurate, and fully accurate details, in my modest opinion are better suited to documentaries.

yes, people who knew the accurate, and minutely detailed biographical anissa would say anissa would never have listened to diana ross or any disco song, so be it, but the majority of the audience, who would probably not even know of "family affair" or anissa jones, would be bored with a dramatized detailed biography, i know i would. if i were to create a literary treatment of anissa's i would only take the essentials and frame them in a more allegorical, fable-like, possibly gothic way, a little hawthorne, a little poe, a little fitzgerald. i would fill it with abundant ironies, try to bring forth the moral complexity and ambiguity that so fills her tragic life and death. a central theme i would try to highlight is the intertwining of fate, accident, and free will in her story.

but anyway, i'm so glad you're here! i could hug and kiss you for being such a sincere and serious fan!
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